Kanye West: Be-All, End-All You Can Be… All

Kanye Please is back!

"There's nothing more to be said about music. I'm the fucking end-all, be-all of music. I know what I'm doing. I did 808s in three weeks. I got it. It's on cruise control. . . . Man, we talked about music for God knows how long! Now let's talk about how my f*cking sweater didn't come back right from Korea. That's what's interesting me." –Kanye West, Details Magazine

I don’t know what’s more entertaining, reading shit like this or watching A-Rod deliver the most insincere apologies in the history of forced apologies.

Hall-of-famer Kanye West has closed the book on music. Music is done. There are no records left to break and no one will reach the heights Yeezy’s ascended to. Since Mr. West is the end-all, be-all of music as a whole—not just the hippety-hop--I guess niggas need to hold one of them LV 54.11s up to their ears for auditory entertainment going forward. I wonder what the fuck the Leather Louis told Mr. King, jr.

It probably told Kanye, “Hurry the fuck up with that record, nigga. I need you to design me some laces and find me a non-matching blazer!”

Three weeks on an album isn’t all-that impressive anyway. In the Motown-era some of that shit was done in a day without any artists having the luxury of being able to sample the fuck out of themselves.

“Damn, Otis. I told you we should have used that David Ruffin sample. Now the damn Four Tops done took our spot in this bitch.”

My mid-90s teen rap group Tha New Balance Ballerz made our debut record for a small indie label over one sleepover weekend at the rich white member’s house. He had a nice computer and a microphone with a popper stopper like in the real studio. We wrote and produced the entire shit from 4PM Friday to 11AM Sunday and celebrated with a Giants game later that afternoon.

My point? That shit is a solid XL record and took us 36 hours from beginning to end. Classic music comes from the combination of talent and care. While Kanye’s super-talented—far less so than he thinks—his love for the music right now appears akin to Bush’s love for the work of his presidency.

[Blogger’s Note: Any one. Tyson. Jordan. Jackson. The U.S. The Texas Rangers…]

Question of the Day: Would you, the reader/listener, rather hear about the sweater that didn’t come back right from Korea than Kanye’s latest project?

I’m sure some of you would. For the rest of us that actually give a shit about the music Kanye’s supposed to be the king of—

Wait a fine Egyptian cotton-pickin minute. I thought Rihanna was the most important figure in contemporary music. That’s what he said this time last week. What the fuck is this man smoking?

Perhaps my confusion can be clarified with his sentiments on being the voice of a generation.

"If not me, then who? Someone could be a better rapper, dance better. But culturally impacting? When you look back at these four and a half years, who’s the icon at the end of the day? Who broke down color barriers? What other black guy would a white person use as a fashion reference?”

Okay, nevermind. I get it. Kanye’s Jackie Robinson and Rihanna’s Seattle Mariners-era Ken Griffey, jr. Cool. We’re good now.

Let’s then hope Rihanna keeps it Griffey and avoids the use of performance-enhancing substances in her recovery from the 30-day DL.

Questions? Comments? Requests? Think Kanye should be the Texas Rangers’ president? ron@ronmexicocity.com