2009 DDN Tournament – Round 1, Midwest Region Voting

Ladies, gentlemens, skip-skaps and scolly-whops… Welcome to the opening round of the 2009 DDN Tournament. You’ve been waiting entirely too long as it is. Let’s dive right into the first round matchups in the Midwest Region, where voting is already in-progress.

#1 Yung Berg vs. #16 BooBooTV.com Dude

Mr. Dark Butt didn’t come all this way as an 2008 NP/DNCAA First-Teamer to be ousted in the first round, or did he? The mystery fucker in 50 Cent’s BooBooTV experiment may be poised to fuck up brackets left and right. We’ve all seen the video. That’s some indubitable, unimpeachable nasty shit. What’s dumber, cultural self-hatred + shit-talking + being “an artist” or going raw dog on The Leaning Tower of Skeezer in 2009? [VOTE @ WWW.RONMEXICOCITY.COM]

#8 Katt Williams vs. #9 Steve Harvey

Do you cast your sole vote on the man who forgot his own name at a motel before throwing stones? Do you go with reigning Coon of the Year who somehow thought he could outhumor Pimpin’s Paramount in Detroit? Is wearing the original Chopper Suit enough to skate by to the next round? [VOTE @ WWW.RONMEXICOCITY.COM]

#4 Alex Rodriguez vs. #13 [Every] Major Label [Sucks Dick]

One didn’t know if he was doing it right. The other hasn’t done anything right since the internet era began. Both are likely to be involved in hooker scandals. Is A-Roid dumber than your standard-issue out-of-touch record label executive with nothing newer than 1982 in his personal music collection? [VOTE @ WWW.RONMEXICOCITY.COM]

#5 Octomom vs. #12 Kid Cudi

Now that he’s retracted his retirement bitch fit, Kid Cudi’s looking like Jonah in the face of mother grouper. He’s chum to a whale at this point, but only votes matter. Maybe Octomom isn’t as interesting as the form-fitting, multicolored hoodies that grace the rap magazine covers these days. [VOTE @ WWW.RONMEXICOCITY.COM]

#3 Sarah Palin vs. #14 Charles Barkley

They both inexplicably harbor political aspirations. I get the feeling Palin can hold her liquor a little better. I also get the feeling she knows to have her hoes cab it top-speed to the crib, as opposed to getting caught out there sweaty and speeding. Charles, on the other hand, has to know that Africa isn’t one big country. It’s broken up into at least 5 of 6 smaller ones. [VOTE @ WWW.RONMEXICOCITY.COM]

#6 Kwame Kilpatrick vs. #11 Jim Cramer

Pimpin’ Kwame broke damn near every law in the books en route to his slow, long-awaited ouster. To his credit, he did his time and went down gracefully… compared to Rod Blagojevic, that is. Cramer not only knowingly capitalized off of the greed and mishandling that ultimately forced Kilpatrick [and his entire constituency] into a life of pimping, but came to The Daily Show for his public flogging. Wowsers. [VOTE @ WWW.RONMEXICOCITY.COM]

#7 Karrine “Superhead” Steffans vs. #10 Jesse Jackson

I’m sure Jackson’s plenty pleased to be so close to Superhead, even if only in a metaphorical bracket. The former SDN Cinderella regressed enough in 2009 to lose the benefit of doubt that earned her the respect to be considered “smart” by the sweaty locker room known as the XXL readership. Jesse just wants his nuts back. [VOTE @ WWW.RONMEXICOCITY.COM]

#2 Plaxico Burress vs. #15 VLADTV.COM Content

We’ve got some of the world’s most blatantly niggerish content up against one of the world’s most blatant niggers. Yes, I said “niggers”. Only a nigger would have his baby moms iced and hide in the trunk of his car until discovered by the po– What? Wrong wide receiver? He only shot himself? Damn. Why is he ranked so highly? [VOTE @ WWW.RONMEXICOCITY.COM]

Questions? Comments? Requests? Having trouble deciding on the dumbest of the dumb niggas? ron@ronmexicocity.com

  • DaLockerRoom.com aka Deez Nutz

    Let me find out Im the first one to the show…Man it don’t get no better than this…who said the tournament started last week. Let the madness begin

  • 20 Mil

    There is no possible way Berg should be upset in this region

  • DV8

    Octo-mom and Plaxico are destined for a head on collision, but Superhead is a dangerous dark-horse (no Yung berg).

  • Pierzy

    Octo-Mom is like UNLV in 1991.

    • DV8

      yeah she even birthed her own team

      • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

        hiyooooooooooo!!!

        seriously. that’s fucking funny.

  • Boo Boo James

    I’m dissapointed in “Chopper’s SUIT” getting a play in spot but my money is on on Tyga or Yung Berg to win it all. Can’t wait for the K-Ci and JoJo v. DMX cokedown showdown. It should be one for the books.

    • $ykotic

      Chopper suit?

      Aww man you brought that over here…

  • Apollo Moses

    Does that mean she’ll lose in the final four?
    1990 won they won the chip. Larry gold tooth Johnson would say she is more like Duke…going back-2-back.

  • Lowedwn

    ***Bil Duke stare****

    “Mexxxico, you know you done fucked up right?”

    let the igeerishness begin, LMAO

  • amar

    octo MOM vs. KID kudi?!?! irony! is this on purpose?!?!

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      hahaaha. no. there really wasn’t any pun or irony intended with any of these.

  • amar

    fuck my comments aren’t getting through…i’mma check back and they’ll be there and look like a jackass later…

  • giantstepp

    “Pimpin’ Kwame broke damn near every law in the books en route to his slow, long-awaited ouster. To his credit, he did his time and went down gracefully…” LMAO

    True indeed Mex. Kwame fucked shit up but was smooth as silk the entire time. I personally got the brother making a come back. Shit, Marrion Barry did it after being caught smoking crack, trying to get some ass from a woman that was not his wife, and it was shown across the entire world. He is a DC city councilman to this day!

  • http://XXL GSIDE

    Yo MEx to keep ever thing on the up and up what should we be looking for in a champion ?

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      we should be looking for a dumb-dumb nigga. however you define it is cool. we had a bunch of discussion about what a smart-dumb nigga is, i don’t see why this will be any different.

      this is a fun social experiment.

  • BIGNAT

    Plax is winning by a landslide in his match up

  • http://hiphoponmymind.blogspot.com/ DJ Daddy Mack

    MY PICKS: YUNG BERG, KATT WILLIAMS, MAJOR LABELS, KID CUDI, CHARLES, CRAMER, SUPERHEAD AND VLAD TV. THESE THINGS SHOULD WIN. VOTE OR DIE SONS!

  • Jamal7Mile

    My votes:

    YUNG BERG – Come again! Detroit needs all the stimulus we can get, man! The Transformer is nice!

    KATT WILLIAM – Smoked that D-Town oohWEE! Yup, we robbed you too!! Almost got put on the track, homie!

    A ROD – Cinderella?? You on the news as I type this!

    KID CUDI – Weird matchup. Octomom is evily smart.

    SARAH PALIN – Dee Dee DEEEEE!!! (hey Mencia).

    KWAME KILPATRICK – We went to the same highschool, Kwame. You made the Technicians look like SHIT! Thanks man. Stay off the fuckin’ phone, dummy!!

    JESSE JACKSON – Stop chasing those hoes Jesse!

    PLAXICO – A blind vote… I’ve never been to Vlad.tv so…

  • Dub Sac

    So am I the only one that thought it was hilarious that Mr. BoobooTV only lasted for all of two minutes before busting his nut? He’s lucky they blurred his face out. You don’t want people watching your two-pump chumpery on the internet.

  • DETROIT

    i still don’t understand how prodigy makes these lists! he’s one of the best rappers ever, and the shit he rants about IS TRUE! he’s a ddn for trying to spread knowledge?

    also, chopper shoulda not only made the list, but he shoulda been a #1 seed for wearing that cheap ass suit IN DETROIT! nigga that suit is garbage anywhere, but in the D, one of the only cities where hood niggas know what a good suit is! AND HE THOUGHT HE WAS STUNTIN? TALKIN LIKE HE OWNED A LAMBO….THAT SHIT WAS PRICELESS!