Lesbians: not as hot as we once thought?

I’m pretty sure I read somewhere the other day that, in the past few months, Nicki Minaj has gone from hinting that she might be a lesbian, to full-on rapping about going down on other women, playing with their cans. etc. She may have even come out, so to speak, as the woman in that video talking about how Remy Ma ate the box – I honestly don’t know. Even though I’ve probably written a few posts about Nicki Minaj at this point, I try to avoid anything and everything having to do with her. I’m honestly not even sure what’s more bothersome to me: the sight of her huge ass stuffed inside a pair of stretch pants she probably copped from an Ashley Stewart, the fat woman’s clothing store typically found in ghetto strip malls sandwiched between a Korean beauty supply and a grocery store where they look at you funny if you actually pay with cash, or the sound of her voice rapping in that accent that sounds like it was purposely selected to antagonize men. Which was all the proof I ever needed that she can’t stand guys.

(Speaking of both Young Money and women with huge asses, has everyone seen those pictures of Drake and the black chick his label hired to pretend to be his girlfriend? She might be even more thundery through the thigh region than Nicki Minaj – though I saw some pictures of her with her pants off, and her ass was actually fairly well-sculpted, for how big it is. But I’m not buying for a minute that Drake has any real interest in her. There’s no way he could have grown up surrounded by the kind of pussy on that new Degrassi series, only to become a chubby chaser. That’s just not how it works.)

Nicki Minaj must have thought that people would be a lot more interested in the idea of a female rapper who (openly) gets it on with other women than they apparently are. Otherwise, she wouldn’t have dragged out the process of revealing her sexual proclivities: trying to holler at Amber Rose on Twitter; mentioning in interviews how many girls’ boobs she signs at concerts; that song she did Ludacris (I think) about trying to recruit another girl for a menage a trois, so on and so forth. As if anyone would find the idea of menage a trois Robert Downey Jr.-style, with two girls and a guy, particularly noteworthy. As far as I’m concerned, that’s the only kind of menage a trois that should exist. Which is not to say that I wouldn’t tag team a broad, if she was attractive enough, and there wasn’t any way I could just have her to myself. But I doubt I’d enjoy it as much. I’d be too concerned that a guy’s load might accidentally land on my shirt – which once happened to Artie Lange. I suppose the other guy could wait in the next room until you finish, but then you wouldn’t be able to tag him in, which would defeat the entire purpose.

But I digress.

Lest there was any confusion as to people’s disinterest in Nicki Minaj’s taste for fish, a recent song by Lil Kim about the joys of chewing on carpet – clearly intended to capitalize on the media’s fascination with Nicki Minaj – was greeted with a similar response: crickets. As I recall, the lyrics were even more explicit than anything I’ve heard from Nicki Minaj. But it just came off as sad, since Lil Kim has never seemed that interested in girls until just now – like the hip-hop equivalent of those supposedly straight bodybuilder guys who fuck other guys in the ass on film, because there’s so much money to be made doing it. Gay for pay it’s called. Nullus! There was also a picture of her out somewhere with a woman she obviously wanted us to think she’s been having sex with. I would have found it a lot more interesting, if she were at all attractive at this point, or if the two of them were actually making out or some shit. Instead, it reminded me of these black lesbian couples you see where you have to wonder if they’re really that into other women, or if they’ve just given up on trying to find a man.

  • Masonic

    Cosign that Minaj and Kim suck -musically and on carpet.

    • ToyBarbie

      Wow…such haters! You guys, come on….cheer up!

  • jp

    “I’m honestly not even sure what’s more bothersome to me: the sight of her huge ass stuffed inside a pair of stretch pants she probably copped from an Ashley Stewart, the fat woman’s clothing store typically found in ghetto strip malls sandwiched between a Korean beauty supply and a grocery store where they look at you funny if you actually pay with cash, or the sound of her voice rapping in that accent that sounds like it was purposely selected to antagonize men.”

    I’ve often asked myself the same question.

  • sealsaa

    proclivities: Brought to you by the letter P!

  • Jhon da Analyst

    Nicki Minaj sux period and her voice is annoying as fuck. Just my opinion……

  • fastflipper

    nice post

    nicki is mad ugly and got no skillz

    thats why the T.I. have to make us belive shes a lesbian…thats shes different that the other scums bags that we saw before her

  • Justice4All

    I really don’t care-Most rappers are “Hollywood” anyway, just trying to be in the “in crowd” and most of the in crowd is gay now. Actually what these people choose to be has no bearing on how I live my life and in the grand scheme of things really don’t matter to me. Make music? o.k., cool-good for you-you gay? o.k., whatever, now even senators wanna be gay. Sodomites.

  • SuperstarExtraordinaire

    “…suppose the other guy could wait in the next room until you finish, but then you wouldn’t be able to tag him in, which would defeat the entire purpose.”

    Hahaha Byron u are a disturbingly hilarious ass motherfucker.

  • CaliKid

    This all you got Bol? Must be a slow day!

  • CaliKid

    This all you got Bol? Slow day huh?

  • http://www.xxlmag.com/?p=78127 jay

    minaj is hot ..how do u not love that booty?!??

    n that video where she was tryin recuit another bitch was for usher vid lil freak..im smash minaj quick n do nethin for a minaj lil kim 3 some..cmon bol i kno u like white bitches(me to) maybe cuz im white but i prefer rican bitchs myself..but how do u not instantly get fuckin hard as a rock thinkin bout a 3 some lmao..

    • valdez

      ^^actually, it’s very easy to “not love that booty” when it’s blatantly fake.

  • cmoney91

    the girls from degrassi>nicki minaj

  • Enlightened

    That lesbian shit was never “hot” to me.

    My only purpose for a menage is that it would allow me to fuck both of the women. Anything they do to each other is just incidental contact.

    That shit don’t turn me on.

  • .tony.

    nicki minaj only really has a sort of cute face, her body looks like some kind of mistake of science fiction;
    mr potato head + sasquatch + $200 worth of makeup from the mall

  • El Tico Loco

    If you manage to smash a lesbian, you need give powerball a chance too. Now a bi chick on the other hand if she gets in the mood for hotdogs and tacos at the same time she will go out with you to pick up girls to bring back to the crib, and it helps that their standards are usually higher than ours (right bol?).

  • http://letyoutellit.com http://letyoutellit.com

    I LOVE LESBIANS – NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nicki Minaj has so much potential she just went over board with that voice and gimmick crap before she even put a album out. But she is still doing something right cause she is at a all time high with haters from everywhere.

  • Killa Kels

    29 yo married black man with 3 kids and I LOVE Nicki Minaj. The ass; the voice; the flow; the out-the-closetness. I love her. Anybody hatin on Nicki is miserably unhappy with their own lives and project their unhappiness outward towards other people. REAL SHIT

    • valdez

      “Anybody hatin on Nicki is miserably unhappy with their own lives…”

      GTFOH!! better yet, just kill urself now.

      • Killa Kels

        Your animosity towards me helps to further validate my point. I appreciate that.

        • DA Truth

          @ Killa Kels in the words of Flex “you have a lot of moist energy”

        • Killa Kels

          How you feel about me aint got shit to do with me.

  • Magc

    I have not listened to any Nicki Minaj tracks, ever, so I am neutral on any talent she actually has on the microphone. And visually, she’s just a better looking Lil Kim. However…the Massive Attack single did not go ANYWHERE. Fact. So you know some record executives got shook up. That’s probably why she couldn’t tour with Rhianna.

    And…popularity on black blogs and black twitter does not automatically translate into gold or platinum selling cds with white people, who actually buy most of the rap out there. Minaj has to go at least gold for any of the hype to be worth it. You can’t get all this free publicity and not at least go gold.

  • Will E. Will

    just for future reference.

    a three some is with two women.

    two men and a woman is not a threesome, that is called a GANG BANG!

  • ChinCheka

    Is this what hip hop has come to? All this gimmick ish is just sad. I thought hip hop was a movement not a marketing plan….

  • q.b.

    bol good post!! i thought i was the only one that voice and wack lyrics was annoying,, and no one knows what she look like for real with all the fake shit attached to her!

  • http://non JB

    I couldn’t have said it better myself. Thanks to the bush economy I am forced to work in one of the sweatshop like call centers of a fortune 500 company. As such, i work around about 200, man-less, bitter black women of varying ages.

    A large chunk of these bitches are like junior league niki minaj’s (re: overly colorful clothes, color plastic weaves, and horrible nasally voices). About 1/2 are straight up lesbos. And you’re definitely right….leave it to the sub standard black bitch to even fuck up the threesome fantasy.

  • P. Harris

    I think you’re fronting if you wouldn’t smash Nicki Minaj… you’re downright crazy if you wouldn’t fuck her…

    Unfortunately, no “guys” are fucking her because she’s a super lesbian…

  • Iz

    Well, I iz a faggot so I love it.

  • RudNare

    “…if she was attractive enough, and there wasn’t any way I could just have her to myself.”

    HaHaHaHaHa…Iyuu! *grins* :)

    Bols U’re liar, U just sour because U lost another fantasy-girl…The fact that she plays for the other team & that there’s no way in hell U can bone her (being-lesbo&all), even if only in U’re imagination must annoy the shit outta U, I know it does to me & every other hot-blooded straight male on the planet! As for her rapping abilities, well, that’s another story…

  • phalmatah

    nicki waz 1 of da celebz i uzd 2 luk up 2 buh al i knw iz shiz jzt sm fakey n dd u c b4 n after pics…money doz chenj ppl…i dnt blame kim 4 h8tin her any way jzt bcoz shiz a lezzer or bio or wat ever she is dznt mean she aint a gud singar!!1