2010 DN Tournament Nomination Ceremony
You’ve waited long enough. It’s time to get the 2010 DN Tournament started. Welcome to the most wonderful time of the NP year.
The DNCAA selection committee has decided to eliminate the SDN and DDN distinctions. Instead, we’re going to toss all of our niggas--smart-dumb and dumb-dumb alike--into a single battle royale. Ideally, we’ll have 64 seeds separated into 4 regional brackets.
[Blogger’s Note: The brackets will be named for regions, but not necessarily consist of seeds from those regions. You know, kinda like the NAACP one in March. NAACP… Them’s the ones who handle the athletics, right?]
This is where we’ll need your help, loyal NP readers. To start next Monday January 18, we will need a field of 64 contestants. I’ll accept your nominations here on XXLMag.com, at Ron Mexico City (where voting will take place), and via email. The 64 best-represented DNs will be announced Saturday, January 16, 2010.
Just to get you started, here are twenty of this year’s automatic entries:
O.J. Da Juiceman
Soulja Boy Tell ‘Em
All further nominations will be appreciated.
Speaking of Lil’ Wayne, I was going to write about Lloyd Banks today until I came across a song in the XXLMag.com Bangers section. For those who are unaware, the Bangers section is the section for bangers… section.
There have been dumb songs with redundant descriptions there since forever. However, I don’t know if ever in my life I’ve come across some depraved shit the likes of “Whip it Like a Slave.” I understand how such a theme can make its way to being a cute little punchline for an uneducated, out-of-touch rapper. I don’t know how even a desperate, god-awful microphone molester like Boo Rossini could think to make it a title. I do know how to get Lil’ Wayne to feature, though. Aspiring rapsters, take note. You have about one month to put cocaine in a stripper’s vagina, slap her on the ass and set her loose around Lil’ Wayne. Lock that guest verse down before... Shit. No pun intended, there. I promise.
Whip it Like a Slave?! Word, nigga? Needless to say, they’re talking about cocaine too. As if the irony didn’t need to be brought full circle, we go from the physical captivity of slavery to the mental and cultural corrosion brought about by the rise of drugs in America to the physical captivity of prison. Ask Buju Banton.
Oh, shit. Add Buju Banton to the list of automatic entries.
Questions? Comments? Requests? Enough! The hour has come. email@example.com