Reality TV just got a lot more interesting

Oh, what it must be like to be a fly on the wall in the offices of one of these cable networks right about now.

From the time I was born until the time I was about 28, the only time I can even remember someone on TV dying was when that Mexican guy died on Sesame Street. And he was a Mexican! (Just kidding.) But in the past few weeks, stars on these reality TV shows have been dying like it’s going out of style – and not from cancer or some shit.

First there was that girl from the show where girls from the flyover states compete to blow Bret Michaels. (Back in the day they would have all gotten their turn, but there’s only so much he can do these days.) Then her husband or boyfriend or whatever went ahead and did the right thing and committed suicide. Then they found DJ AM lying in a bed in his sweatpant, with crack sprinkled all over him. I’m not even sure why they wasted taxpayer dollars doing an autopsy. Let me guess – the coroner is related to the mayor.

Then this past weekend, a guy who was on Real Housewives of Atlanta got the Derrion Albert treatment in the parking lot of a strip club down in Atlanta. As far as I know, there weren’t any 2x4s involved, but he got his head split open to the white meat none the less. He must not have seen my post suggesting that people in dangerous areas wear helmets.

At some point during my weekend-long bender, I saw on CNN where the boyfriend of one of the girls from RHOA had been killed, and I figured Sandra Rose might have something on it. Drug dealer/club promoters and obscure R&B singers in Atlanta? That’s right in her wheelhouse. When I heard the vic’s ex-girlfriend was Kandi Burruss, one of the guys from Xscape, I figured she be a bizarre-looking troll of a woman, like Tiny. But Sandra Rose had a picture of the two of them together, and she was surprisingly smokin’ for a middle aged black women. She hardly had any hair, and she’d be considered zaftig by white people standards, but what are you gonna do?

But I digress.

Word on the street is that this guy who got killed, Ashley “AJ” Jewell, was a known drug dealer (no one tell Alfamega!) and may or may not have been a part owner of the strip club where he was killed, the Body Tap. And you know how corrupt those strip clubs. I know I’ve written on a few different occasions about Sauget, IL, one of the towns around here that has a lot of strip clubs. It even says in Wikipedia that Sauget basically has no laws. If you accidentally shove your arm in a stripper (which could happen…), don’t be surprised if it gets chopped off. And not because it got stuck.

And that’s Southern Illinois. Southern Illinois looks more like a John Mellencamp video than the towns where they shot John Mellencamp videos. I shudder to think what might happen in a strip club down in the A, if you were to accidentally kill a stripper, because you found out it was a tranny. (I’ve heard trannies are rampant down there – though I refuse to believe Pastor Ma$e got tricked.) I mean, obviously this is an example of some shit that could happen to you at a strip club in Atlanta. If you’re unfortunate enough to live in Atlanta, you might just wanna stick to white strip clubs. Because of the socioeconomic background of girls in that industry, a lot of white strippers have pretty big asses anyway. Or so I’ve heard.

Anyway, the producers of RHOA should have known some shit like this could happen. I’ve never seen the show, but from what I understand, it’s a buncha insane middle aged black women and maybe one white chick who all got their money from late ’80s – early ’90s era ball players and R&B singers. Niggas like Al B Sure (who I know is somehow the father of one of Puff Daddy’s children). Obviously, these are precisely the kind of women to end up in a relationship with a drug dealer. They’ve become accustomed to a lifestyle they can no longer afford to maintain. Copies of Nite N’ Day (Al B Sure = the original Kid Cudi) aren’t flying from store shelves at the same rate as those Beatles remasters. They might not even still be on store shelves.

I heard that word went out, in the Viacom building, that these reality show producers needed to check their “talent,” so to speak. This was way back when that girl from Rock of Love turned up dead in a dumpster, as if she was some East Saint street walker. They sunk several hundred  dollars into that show, and they had to stop airing it for a few weeks. Only thing is, this was at VH1, and the network that airs RHOA might be owned by one of the three other corporations that owns the vast majority of media outlets in this country. Bravo or whatever probably figured they didn’t have to worry about any of their talent turning up dead.

Paul Rosenberg, on the other hand, must have received that memo. And obviously he was the first person to have an incident, so to speak, since the memo went out. He was DJ AM’s manager, as well as the producer of the reality series in which AM, a recovering crackhead, handled a crackpipe for probably the first time since he went on the wagon. I’m gonna tread lightly here, because I made some good prostitution jokes, and I want people to be able to read them – but I wouldn’t be surprised if the death of DJ AM was what led to Eminem not being on that hottest MCs list. Think about it: Fabolous was on that list.

  • Chilly Willy

    Reality shows involving remotely famous people, or used-to-be-famous that is, is just recycling.

    The final product may be shiny, but it’s still made out of garbage…

    J7M

  • these posts are racist

    “…got the Derrion Albert treatment.”

    Again, realize you are mocking the brutal murder of a teenaged non-celebrity honor roll student living in one of the harshest communities in the US, at no fault of his own.

    Think.

    • giantstepp

      He aint gonna learn TPAR. I’ve learned to ignore Bol’s poor attempt at “humor” at the expense of the innocent. Bol, check out Mike Bigga’s take on the situation a learn a thing or two you squeeky voice fat fuck! Ayo, somebody post that interview of Bol’s pitful ass.

  • these posts are racist

    how dare you diss Derrion/
    u wanna be Arian/
    my patients is wearin thin/
    u wear a grin/
    as u type shit that’s embarrasin/
    u wouldn’t say shit in front of his parents then/
    why hide behind a keyboard?/
    my comment is a re-ward?/
    well here’s your prize/
    ur a deprived purple whale, disguised/
    as a blogger, when u need to be a jogger/

    talk about Derrion shoulda ran?/
    son, u need to run and be a man/
    put down the burrito and try to read yo/
    something besides whats behind your demented mind, but i guess
    that’s a reach though/
    so/
    go, ahead and break bread with the other shock journalists/
    and get off on talking shit/
    u fake as shit/
    dis a little kid, fine, but remember your a whale of a man, with chick tits.

    • General

      That sound you hear is not applause…

      Its crickets chirping

      • these posts are racist

        “General”,

        I didn’t know you’d arrive so early…that sound hear is my zipper going down, feel free to get off my dick, at your leisure.

      • these posts are racist

        “General”,

        I didn’t know you’d arrive so early…that sound you hear is my zipper going down, feel free to get off my dick, at your leisure.

        • General

          TPAR, TPAR, TPAR here you go again with thinkin you got a dick in the first place, when we all know the only dick you’ve ever had was the ones in your ass and your mouth…

          You want to show some respect for Derrion then quit associating your name with him.

        • these posts are racist

          General…moaning my name over and over “TPAR, TPAR, TPAR…” is not helping your cause. Wow.

        • General

          Nothing can help your cause. Here you continue to be outraged by Bol’s comments while at the same time you continue to drop 15 comments on his blog. I have never seen anyone so blatantly ether themselves over and over again.

    • http://www.byroncrawford.com Sleeze $

      AW SNIZZAP!!! YOU GONNA TAKE THAT BOL-DOG????

    • Phillmatic

      “put down the burrito and try to read yo”

      TPAR is top 5 dead or alive. Right in the mix with Hammer, Kevin Federline and Karl Rove.

      • these posts are racist

        Phillmatic,

        There’s room on my dick for you too. If you can write a better flow…then do it. It’s easy to say you can, but hard to do it. That’s a problem with the youth these days…

        • Phillmatic

          Even if I could write a better flow, I wouldn’t. If I’ve got a problem with somebody’s opinions, I’ll talk it out with them. If their poor conduct continues (as you believe Bol’s has), I’d have to punch them in the face really hard.

          It’s a less embarassing way of settling grievances. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to have a burrito, yo.

      • these posts are racist

        Phillmatic/
        let’s go at it/
        u stay on my dick, if i was homophobic you’d be a…./
        it’s easy to be a critic/
        harder to spit it how u live it/
        treat this beef like alzheimers, and forget it/
        TPAR/XXL star, you can’t get wit it.

        Just a little smack for the kids…

        • Phillmatic

          Wow, I was posting a comment while you were spitting hot fire (No Dylan).

          I love how you ended almost every line with ‘it’.

    • Vakuru Chaivo

      my patients is wearing thin/
      ^^^^
      My own “PATIENTS” did try to kill me this one time I tried to rap like that …I should know I am medical doctor in Kandahar!!

  • $ykotic/Don McCaine

    *sounds whistle*

    Unnecessary roughness, on Bol, still throwing darts at the young boy who died, penalty will be assessed when someone catches you, loss of downs.

    Stop being a douche-nozzle dude.

    • OG Matt Herbz

      I like sports analogies:

      a. “Bol doesn’t get any play.”

      b. “Why?”

      a. “He failed the piss test.

      b. “What did they find?”

      a. “He sits down to pee.”

      –OG Matt Herbz–

      • $ykotic/Don McCaine

        Ha!

  • that nigga

    He must not have seen my post suggesting that people in dangerous areas wear helmets.
    ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

    You my friend, are one sick/demented/crazy dude

  • OG Matt Herbz

    No comprendo.

    Wait, so Eminem is not on that list because his manager is Jewish and managed DJ AM who was an Atlanta housewife on Rock of Love?

    HAHA @ TPAR telling Bol to follow his own untimely, unsolicited advice:

    RUN!

    –OG Matt Herbz–

  • sealsaa

    “I figured she be a bizarre-looking troll of a woman, like Tiny”

    *shudders* Count your blessings that you don’t have to wake up next to her every morning like TI does (or used to)

    @ TPAR

    Anyone can see why you’re upset, but did you ever stop to think that the more visibly irritated you get, the more he’s going to taunt you? Just a thought…

  • El Tico Loco

    Is there any group that you didn’t offend? Oh let me guess you overlooked little people, and fat people don’t diss each other. Other than that you got everything covered.

    @TPAR
    “whale of a man with chick tits”
    *dying right now*

  • http://dasteamwerkmusik.blogspot.com bollocks

    Wwwwwwoooowwwww……..this is exactly why XXL commenters shouldn’t try to rap. You Ethered yourself, man.

  • http://WWW.MAJORMUVS.COM *BLOCK*

    BLOCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    TPAR…U GO HARD MY MAN….I UNDERSTAND WHERE YOU ARE COMING FROM…BUT WITH BOL IT IS WASTE OF TIME….IN FACT SO ARE MOST OF HIS BLOGS!!!! I USE THEM AS MINUTE WASTERS WHEN ITS ALMOST TIME TO GET OFF OF WORK…SOMETIMES THOUGH U GOTTA LET PEOPLE DO WHAT THEY DO BECAUSE THEY WILL GET WHAT THEY GET….

    R.I.P TO THE LIL HOMIE FROM THE CHI!!!

  • http://danjlovesthe90s.wordpress.com DANJ!

    It’s pretty hard to write some shit more ridiculous than that which Bol writes…

    But TPAR might’ve very well done it with that uh, rap.

    -D!

  • latino heat

    i saw one of the Real Housewives Of Atlanta on TMZ the other night and they were asking her about the floods in Atlanta, she acted like she had no clue what they were talking about. she came off like a bitch and sounded totally ignorant. they asked her if she was gonna donate money like Ludaacris and T.I. did, her response was, “huh, no, i’m going to the gay club.”

    that should tell you all you need to know about the mentality of the people on these ignorant ass shows.

  • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

    Y’all cats remember ‘The Running Man’ with Arnold Schwarzeneggar? The whole movie was based around a “reality show” where the losers die & if you survive, you win your freedom. These shows might as well cut out the middle man & just start turning niggas loose in the jungle with cameras on. I’d watch some guy get mauled by a tiger.

    @TPAR
    You should’ve just taken my advice, dude. You could’ve been started a blogspot with all the energy your wasting making new enemies. Screaming out the windows @ passers-by just makes you look crazy. It’s not that you don’t have a point, but this is most definitely overkill. Write your blogs, discredit Bol’s humor until your fingers get tired, then let guys make the choice if they want to be subjected to your anti-establishmentarianism. All you’re doing is spitting in the wind @ this point.

    • these posts are racist

      Tony,

      With all due respect, don’t tell me how and where to comment…your shit is annoying at this point.

      • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

        Nah, my dude. You’ve got “annoying” on lock right now.

        • these posts are racist

          Nah…you just sound like a bitter hater right now.

        • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

          Yes, TPAR. I’m positive that’s exactly what I sound like to you…

          I’m not now, nor ever have I “hated” on you. You just turn molehills into mountains, then stand bewildered when no one else has the gumption to climb them but you.

          It’s all good, juice, just like it was yesterday & will be tomorrow. Keep fighting the good fight.

          Good luck & Godspeed to you.

  • biggamike

    @Tony Grand: I never thought about how running man was a movie about a reality show. That was some glimpse into the future type shit because everything is a damn reality show now. I’m going to have to watch that movie again. Oh, and the amazing race is damn near “The Running Man”.

    • $ykotic/Don McCaine

      “and the amazing race is damn near “The Running Man”.”

      Ain’t that the truth. There’s your next drop homie.

  • Brooklyn

    the irony about that show is that it’s called housewives of atlanta, but only two of them bitches is actually married, that fat man looking one with the big ass mouth and that short asian bitch that might have been fine as hell back in the day but is starting to show her age now. when jd put xscape together, he must have told niggas to find him 4 of the ugliest bitches in atl, because they were all dogfaced. tiny, that bitch’s face always looks like it’s melting. kandi was probably the best looking one in that group, and that’s saying a lot. i mean, with swv and tlc, at least most or all of them bitches were fine, xscape just looked like 4 boys dressed up like girls.

    • Mr. North

      You up here testifying and sh*t LOL

      All absolutly right them bitches aint even married…lmao

      “when jd put xscape together, he must have told niggas to find him 4 of the ugliest bitches in atl, because they were all dogfaced.”

      lmfao

  • http://xxl All Dae

    got the Derrion Albert treatment
    —————————————————-
    lol…oh my aching stomach.

    this guy got it the worst cause he was beaten with no weapons and died. whoever did it really unleashed some stress. i mean they must’ve whooped dudes ass like it never been done before.
    what’s tragic is homie died like a ho in some parking lot all for talking shit.

    reality shows will get more violent as society does.

  • OG Bobby J

    After watchijng the video of that dude getting got, i did notice he threw a punch prior to being hit. Im not saying it should have went down the way it did, but dont walk into a brawl, throw a haymaker, and then claim honor roll innocence. Also, if the background neighborhood is any idication of the areas school system, and the mongaloids in the video are his peers, i am not sure honor roll is even that difficult to achieve when half the people cant read.

    It still is sad it was caught on video, it is so much easier to make fun of it when you did actually see it.

    @ Grand – this dude been had annoying on lock…since like 06…TBAG

  • Chilly Willy

    @tpar

    We all get your point. And I happen to think your intentions are laudable, in that you’re offended by Bol’s humor and want to honor the lil’ homie. Ain’t nothing wrong with that.

    But this kind of behavior actually does everything but honoring the lil’ homie. Get it together, man. At this point, if we all ask Derrion’s family’s opinion about a TPAR, they’ll have a Louis Vuitton-Crystal type moment and say that you’re an unsolicited support right now….

    I know you can have smart convo from time to time. What happened ? You hit the pipe ? Bol is a douche, we all get the idea, now get over it.

    J7M

  • FPL

    Just lost my dawg to senseless violence last week…Im reading these comments damn near in tears… we have come so far to get nowhere. Are we really having fun with this young mans loss of life?

  • biggamike

    This TPAR is going to far. Its almost like some kinda social experiment. Could TPAR and Bol be in cahoots? Bol using TPAR to get more comments on his blog, in turn getting TPAR more attention that he can parley into a blog of his own? Or is something even more sinister in the works…..could TPAR and Bol be…one and the same?

    • latino heat

      @ biggamike

      “could TPAR and Bol be … one and the same?

      that’s been a theory around here for a few years now.

  • These posts are racist

    I have always commented on XXL because I love Hip Hop and felt I contributed to the process that moved the culture forward. Its apparent my comments are not appreciated and my intentions are being questioned by those I highly respect. Love me or hate me, I commented always in good faith. This will be my last comment on XXL. Peace.

    • $ykotic/Don McCaine

      You cause all of that ruckus, then bow out with a quickness.

      Those taking the leader’s chair are prone to criticism and slander.

      You could have kept freestyling, took the post away from Bol(U basically already did), and made you’re point. You gotta know Byron’s fukking with you.

      Unbutton your collar and relax, man.

    • OG Matt Herbz

      TPAR, you went toe to toe with the muthafuckin Herbz and made it out alright, but this shit is getting to you?

      Like Jay said, “Ain’t nothing wrong with the aim, just got to change the target.”

      You know nowadays I ain’t got no problem with you and I’m honestly pleased to see people with some common fucking sense posting in here. Let this shit blow over and step back in the joint like you own the place.

      –OG Matt Herbz–

    • chillin mayne

      jajajajajajajaj, TPAR got to be emotionally unstable right now..jajaajajaja, TPAR u really trippin jajajajajajaj, dude totally not ever gone put an opionion ever…that reminds me of something a young rapscallion would do… reminds me of that skit on that clipse album where dude is bitchin, then his homeboi like “BITCH is u cryin??..”

  • B

    You know you done fucked up now right… you know that right… Damn, someone actually writes something intelligent and puts themselves out there by writing down some lyrics and you muthafuckas jump all on his head. On a hip hop site it’s funny to see how many people get pissed off about a guy trying to rap… damn, I guess you have to write some bland ass comment or some half way funny shit in order to jump in

  • Federal Ranga

    TPAR is leaving? WTF is going on here?

    • Chilly Willy

      It appears so. We made him cry…

  • mazemayhim

    How da phuck you get yo head tapped @ the Body Tap smh no love in this game

  • Master CHeef

    to tell you the truth, i gotta roll with tpar on this one. dude busts some freestyles (this is a hip hop website) all in good fun, and then is accused of being the one who takes things too serious. some of yall are taking it too serious that you think he’s taking it so serious.

    man, dont quit commenting, we lost a lot of good commenters already. this shit used to be like 100 comments. i like a lot of the cats up in here but there’s a few who are really monopolizing the threads. instead of jumping all over someone everytime, we should be encouraging as many people as possible to comment, and increase traffic for the site we all obviously tend to enjoy.

    there’s a lot of us that check in even during the weekend. the more people contributing topics to discuss, then the more these threads can stay open and maybe someone can write something worth reading because it was intelligent, or my personal favorite, something that is funny. i love when a nigga posts a comment that make a nigga like myself lol.

    • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

      I agree with what you’re saying, Cheef, about the site overall.

      But in the same vein, any dude who considers himself a part of XXL has been a target @ one time or another, & very rarely was it just because. Hell, for going on 2 weeks, niggas been on me tough with hatred. SO THE FUCK WHAT? It’s not that bad that I’m going to give up commenting. That’s a facet of the site like anything else. Next week, it’ll be someone else. If that’s the case, I would’ve gave up a long time ago. But, I noticed something; you have you’re battle(s), & unless you keep bringing it up, in a couple days it’s new topics, new threads & a new dude saying some shit to make you laugh or sic ‘em.

      TPAR never struck me as the sensitive type. Unfortunate that Derrion Albert’s death drove him to a point of no return.

      & ftr, for those who don’t understand or know, no one’s attacking TPAR. It started with trying to make him understand that he can’t force feed niggas Anti-Bolism. He wanted the thread to collectively boycott Bol if he didn’t apologize for just being Bol. No Dice. Bol’s entertainment, like Mex, Matt Barone, whoever. Once that didn’t happen after numerous failed attempts @ rallying the troops, now he quits…

      I’ve had my rhyme battles on here & proven myself, so him jotting verses had nothing to do with him throwing in the towel regarding commenting. Cats will gladly start up a cypher. Me & Tpar just went @ it about a month back just because. So, it has nothing to do with that.

      Real talk though; It’s not that serious TPAR.

      • Master Cheef

        no doubt, Tony, that you’ve earned your stripes above and beyond, but these kinda lil niggas that come at you and you handle with ease, they just wanna have fun. i, for one, enjoy all those battles and the shit def. gets better when they elicit the response they’re looking for. the truth is, however, the way you came at tpar is different from kids wanting to battle. telling him to “start a blog”? his comments are tired? if one of the people whose opinion you respected (he said he respected your’s) came at you like that, it would be more discouraging than some groupies trying to get u to spit a hot 16 for us to enjoy.

        niggas like general and philmatic who just jump in to call a rhyme wack, are wack. tpar said you dont like the rhyme, then post a better one. you, of all people, should appreciate that. let’s get it on in here (no homo), and mix it up. somebody posts some rhymes, don’t freak out, like omg, somebody’s battling on the internet, what a loser. let’s build. dont call someone’s rhymes wack unless you’re willing to post one.

        i enjoy a good e-rap beef, and if i’ve got the time, ill get with any nigga that wanna roll. i’m bout to write a 16 right motherfucking now and drop that shit.

        no shots, Tony, your comments are some of the best. they have a point while being humorous at the same time. 2 for 1. but it did seem like you were putting yourself in a position of enough authority to dictate how much commenting is too much. just like you felt disrespected when some niggas told you the same thing, imagine if it had been skyotic or og matt herbz that said it to you.

        • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

          Actually Cheef, that was a continuation from actual advice I tried to give him last week. He’d have a better chance @ starting an anti-Bol blog, than trying to convince cats to go against the system in the comment section.

          But, I understand your well made point. Kudos for breaking it down like that.

          Just like you, General, $yk, Herbz, etc., the respect is mutual & obvious, or so I thought. I got love for all my dudes, even when we bicker & disagree. Niggas are a family on here, because as soon as somebody jump on talking some “fuck the commission” or spamming us with their wack site, we all swarm.

          I got it though. Touche. Still though, you gotta have thick skin when you put your opinion out there so loudly. & if anybody knows that, it should be TPAR.

          & you know I don’t put down anybody’s raps unless they intentionally came for me (paauuuuuusssse!!!!!!!).

        • Master Cheef

          cosign. thick skin is a must for these parts.

          just to let you know it’s all love, i check for your blog right along with bol’s and dp’s.

        • Master Cheef

          no homo to “thick skin is a must for these parts”

      • chillin mayne

        Sanctuary!!

  • Master Cheef

    is the irony that tpar ended up being the derrion albert of the xxl gangland?

  • capcobra

    shit got so crazy in the comment section that i damn near forgot what the post was about…special thanks to tpar..i actually enjoyed that 1st e-style you posted champ..good work..but i also laughed at the brett favre retirement speech..can’t forget i cried over xscape being 4 dudes dressed as girls..it was a good read post to comments..i ain’t gon front tho’..i tried to smash kandi back in 05..i never did but i always will…other than that..common shut down that maxwell show tonight..it was a good look for hip hop on a r&b “arena” tour.

  • Master CHeef

    I’m irrationally equipped
    With an unhealthy ration of bullets and clips
    Cool whips and shit, bitches who blow dick
    With two lips and strip
    You fucking with fate and disaster
    You don’t wanna get ate by the Master
    Not just a reference to how much I inhale
    But also to my dominance over all the people the world entails
    I’ll leave you the blackest and bluest
    Hatless and toothless, goddammit, I’m ruthless
    My cabbage is screwless, I’m bringing the newness
    Do all that huffing and puffing, but it gets tough when
    You come face to face with a real ruffian
    Who’s already tempted to do that stuff again
    You’ve got an underachiever’s score
    Hoping for a meager award
    I’m eager for war, knocking at the reaper’s door
    I’ll leave you with a leak or four
    Bleeding out your pores
    Your girl said she wants a newer team
    Got her legs spread, you should view her scene
    Then I screw her thing till she oozes cream
    Bruises and screams, and loses her steam
    Then I spew manure in between
    Her ass cheeks, enough to last weeks
    Yup, I’m a nasty freak

    • macdatruest

      Who is Master Cheef fans? A buncha Halo faggots/I’ll leave his soul wit the halo body covered in maggots

      Got the nerve to try to co-sign Tony Grand$ like you respected/Yo street cred was Federline last time I checked it

      I suprised you actually avoided sayin Mac/but Im not suprised you defended freestyles then came wack

      I already seen the set up cause I been done demolished you/Yo flow was tarnished since then and aint no nigga polished you

      You always rappin bout somebody girl where yo bitch?/ you like Fiddy stay single, makin hoodrats rich

      “Then I spew manure in between her ass cheeks”/You POOPED on yo career posting SHIT that weak

      Guns and other niggas girls that shit is so laughable/Yo rah rah bullshit is barely understandable

      Blackest and bluest, my cabbage is screwless?/If you like Fab style let Fabolous do it

      You still work at McDonald’s and part time e-thug it?/Gt back on ya grind I need a 20 piece nugget

      and when ya sneak back on line, we can battle on each subject/You sell burgers you know this was lunch time, not beef was it?

      Da Truest

  • Master CHeef

    Speaking of groupies trying to get a nigga to spit a hot 16
    Last time we met, you got split clean
    Surprised I didn’t mention your name, or disappointed?
    You stay on my dick, hoping to join it and enjoy it
    Don’t need your respect, don’t want it
    Shit that you’re on, I ain’t on it
    Raps you spitting, I don’t condone it
    That shit was so soft, it was more like a sonnett
    I also earned my stripes, proud as well
    Repping like a harley revving its pipes loud as hell
    And if you won that battle that happened in the past tense
    Then how come you’ve only left like 2 comments since?
    This is sense that you’re trying to go against
    Let me tell you what you missed b/c obviously ignorance is bliss
    Your whole style is wick wack, do you get that?
    Or are you as clueless as someone that needs a tic tac
    You’re the trash left over from the rift raft
    I’d like to give you a big slap gift wrapped
    You say you’re kenyan?
    Go back to your dominion
    No one values your opinion
    “e-thug it & nuggets”?,
    even john deere wouldn’t have dug it
    seriously, guy, you need to ease up off the nut hugging
    your own cousin say you buggin
    and he don’t hardly speak english or nothin
    your style is as fresh as the fast food you mention every flow
    & everybody knows wisconsin’s a place for scary hos
    just telling you how the story goes
    you need to quit spitting those nerdy flows
    they’re too weak to worry foes
    you have a blurry prose and err’body knows
    your obsession with mcdonalds is what’s laughable
    hung up on a job there cause they told you that you were not even applicable
    switch it up at least, instead of always using mickey d’s, try arby’s
    or fuck, how about burger king, wendys, jack n the box, or hardees
    your problem is you’re too repetitive
    and that’s a huge impediment
    quit with all the tuff guy talk
    I’m walking all over u like a sidewalk
    I know you think its ok to be fun n gay
    Wearing your little mullet, dressin up like kanye
    Touchin on little boys like a priest on Sunday
    Bout to destroy mac and there’s more than one way
    Thank god for the pen, I ain’t gotta resort to gunplay
    I gotta say I find it commendable
    That you even think this is winnable
    You’re obviously a hopeful individual
    But you are reprehensible, them shits is incomprehensible
    I find them all abysmal
    Rapping at Cheef was a rookie mistake
    You’re pussy and doo-doo, call u nookie shit waste
    Your life has less meaning than your words have
    I’ve got an ocean of rhymes, you’ve got a bird bath
    Going from water to land, I’ll send you to a dirt nap
    Everyone heard the shot fired, but no one heard tha slap
    I will send however many slugs your chest wants
    Serving niggas like a fuckin restaurant
    You get on here to hate and no one likely cares
    Reach in yo ass and remove my nike airs
    Leave xxl, pack your suitcase
    GTFOH, find a new place
    You, my friend, are a true waste
    Who is a wack clown trick
    that can suck my fat, brown dick

    • macdatruest

      I’ll keep it short cause its quality of quantity/You really wrote two blogs worth of garbage to respond to me?

      You silly ass dude thats a waste of an hour/At 7 in the morning you shoulda been in the shower

      Instead you woke up and spit garbage in detail/But why wash ya ass when you aint got a female?

      “Nookie shit waste?” you garbage as all hell/you call that a long verse I call that a long nail

      In your freestyle coffin, you get bested quite often/skipped breakfast this morning just hop on my sausage

      Your mom asked you what was wrong you didnt feel like talkin/ran to the basement cryin sneezin coughin and bloggin

      “Servin niggas like retaurants” the realest shit you ever wrote/”your a pussy and doo doo” the dumbest shit I’ll ever quote

      Do yo niggas see the shit you be writing? You sayin they dont laugh at you/Who’s backin’ you in this battle??…..exactly dog I’m baffled too

      You faker than them Most Wanted white boys from Malibu/You wanna swing off? Oh you mad cause Im Mackin’ you

      You know my shit hot, it aint never been a secret/Elite shit fuck wit me you gonna get the treatment

      You wrote a garbage rap next time you should make it piff/You called me Kanye? and I stole ya shine? you Taylor Swift

      You a chipmunk High pitched, chasin nuts-Alvin/Gettin by all ya life flippin fries-Calvin

      In the lobby lookin real solemn/every Mac wit cheese you ring up-make you get an attitude problem

      Shoulda never battled Mac shoulda played Possum/ask the white boys in here who sucks and whos awesome

      Yea ya lost one….

      Da Truest

  • chillin mayne

    jaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa…..fresh ass battle on both side, bunch of qoutables, cheef where u at with the rebuttal though?

  • Master Cheef

    Wisconsin’s school system must be tender hearted
    With those kiddy flows, yo ass should still be in kindergarten
    Life’s ups and downs have left a nigga hardened
    My trigger doesn’t pardon
    Quantity or quality? I had both, you had neither
    Face it, loser, you suffered a real bad ether
    Now take it like a man and shake it off
    In this, you’ve got no stake at all
    And no cushion to break that fall
    Telling me when I should shower is mad suspect
    That’s why you’ve never had trust yet
    & why u always asking about my girl? No, I’m not single
    go to the gay dating website to look for men with which to mingle
    you’re a real clown, a fuckin bozo, what’s wrong wit u, don’t know yo
    but even when fags say macdatruest, they have to follow it w no homo
    nigga is u trippin, you on lsd?
    lost yo mind trying to mess with me
    my rhymes have wit and cadence
    yours are dripping with lameness
    I’m wild, boy. You cant tame this
    You remind me of buddens trying to get at mef
    You got a few e-friends, but your whore and dignity left
    Better yet, you like game going at jay
    You’s a groupie nigga, a lame going gay
    You’re a fag and don’t even seem shamed to say
    Shameless faggotry to go along with your nameless douche baggery
    Make yourself feel better and go get you one of those mcds’ burgers
    Nothing left for you here, you got fucking murdered
    So bad that’s it damn near unheard of
    Listen, I’m only gonna say this once
    You’re a dunce, so this will be my last response
    So I don’t wanna hear shit about I gave up
    Not worth my time unless you’re gonna come with something worth a flaming fuck
    Honestly, I think your hyped mind’s gone
    Your raps are too wack to waste my tight rhymes on

  • $ykotic/Don McCaine

    Ha! My dudes!

  • chillin mayne

    1st 2 lines of that rap had me laughin allready “wisconsin school system must be tender hearted” mwa ja jaaaaaaaaaa…on point

  • Master Cheef

    thanks for reading, chillin mayne, and appreciate the feedback. hope shit’s cool over there in England.