Five things that occurred to me while listening to Beanie Sigel's Jay-Z dis record.

With all due respect, past and present, and without further to do:

1) Beanie Sigel is just broke, right?

The first thing I thought, when I saw on Twitter a few minutes ago (I slept in) that Beanie Sigel put out a Jay-Z dis record, is that Beanie Sigel must be broke, looking for a handout. Like Jaz-O, Damon Dash, etc. This was before I even got to the part where he started talking about how doesn't want to sit on Jay-Z's lap, because Santa Clause isn't real, let alone is he black. But it hadn't occurred to me until just now that "What We Talkin' About" from the Blueprint 3 must be all about the bums he had to let go, when he left Def Jam for Live Nation. When he said he wasn't talking about Game, Jaz, etc., he meant it. He was really talking about Sigel and the rest of those guys from Philly. Remember they all supposedly got let go on the same day, via courier? Jay-Z knew better than to call them into his office and explain to them that their services wouldn't be needed.

2) We don't believe you. You need more people.

Beanie Sigel claims he's been the fly on the wall in the Def Jam building for so long that he could expose Jay-Z. He even has information that could make Beyonce look at him differently. Oh, really? I took the line about Beyonce to mean that he's either seen Jay-Z banging other broads, or maybe he's even seen him banging other guys. Maybe one day he accidentally walked in on one of Jay's heated phone conversations with that guy from the Kansas City Chiefs with whom he shares an apartment, who, I've been informed, was recently suspended from the NFL for calling someone a Christopher Street boy - Christopher Street being the street in New York where all of the fruits hang out. How would he know? Also, where is this apartment he shares with Jay-Z located?

3) Stop snitching, Jay-Z.

Presumably, Beanie Sigel wants Jay to cut him a check, before he lets the world - and, by extension, Beyonce - know what he accidentally saw. But he's gonna come right out and tell us that Jay called the cops on him. Maybe he saw where Jay cut a check to the Pigs in a Blanket Foundation, to make it alright for him to exploit the victims of 9/11 to help promote his new album, and he figured that informing people that Jay doesn't just call the cops when he wants to give them money wouldn't cause sufficient. I'm not as familiar with the code of the street, but it could be that Jay-Z has priced himself out of the stop snitching policy. It sounds like Beanie Sigel may have been coming to visit Jay during the recording of Blueprint 3, and Jay may have thought he was coming to rob him. Which is certainly understandable.

4) What does he want from Jay-Z, anyway?

Beanie Sigel claims that when he got of the joint (which time? - zing!), he went to see Jay to request out of his deal with Rocafella, to go somewhere else where he could make some real money. Jay spent some time playing with a tennis ball, which is how he made all of his important business decisions, then decided that no, Beanie Sigel had to stick with Rocafella. Which begs the question: where was Beanie Sigel about to go where he could make more money than he did when he was on Rocafella, and how come he can't just go there now, since he's been let go from Rocafella? He should just admit he wants Jay-Z to cut him a check. He thinks him and his crew from Philly were responsible for a lot of Jay's swag/street cred in the late '90s - early '00s, and now he's had all of this success, and they should be able to share in it. It's not even that bad of a point. It's too bad our public schools aren't the sites of socialist indoctrination Glenn Beck says they are.

5) Sigel may have spent too much time in the joint.

Things got kinda homoerotic towards the end there, didn't they? (Nullus.) Maybe one of the reasons Sigel keeps claiming he doesn't want any money from Jay is that what he really wants is a hug. Those lines about how this isn't an invitation to dis Jay-Z, it's just him taking his brother in the yard for five minutes, cuz he's got a knot in his chest that needs to be loosened, and how only real friends leave footprints on your heart, and Jay-Z's is starting to fade in the sand, sound less like a dis record and more like a love letter from a jilted teh ghey guy to his ex. Remember that video where Beanie Sigel was trying to shove his tongue down Peedi Crakk's ear? I'm just saying.