Where Is Barack?

“Where is Washington? Where is Barack?!”

Germaine Miller

Barack is probably somewhere fucking up a health care proposal—I mean, chasing down Mexican pork. I mean—working diligently on making our country better. Please forgive the man if he doesn’t have time to overturn C-Murder’s second murder conviction.

Isn’t Percy Miller supposed to be a 5-star general or something? I’ve seen him drive a tank on a basketball court with 7-foot rims. Maybe he’s got some pull in Washington.

I know Germaine Miller is in a difficult place right now, but this situation is not what negro Presidents are used for. They’re for the mass absolution of racism-associated guilt, not to give niggas O.J. passes.

Believe me. I checked the mailbox repeatedly for my O.J. pass. Nothing.

This reminds me of a little girl I saw on the Maury show. You may know this program by its working title, In the Case of 7-Month-Old Dontarius, Tayvon, You ARE The Father. This particular episode was one of them trouble teen jawns where Maury gets the bodyguard from Jerry Springer or that ‘roid rage Scott Storch-lookin’ dude to throw teenage girls in the clink for fucking too much.

As the junior hoodrats are introduced, this one country high-yeller middle schooler boasts an imaginary skripper pole and has the nerve to say that she could commit whatever crime she wanted because Obama would give her a pass. Germaine seems to share some of this girl’s delusion.

Granted, Germaine Miller is just that—a Miller. Who knows how long she’s been delusional? It seems to run in the family. I’m sure being rich as fuck doesn’t help, yurrrrd me? Master P still thinks people want to hear his music and wear his Wal-Mart clothes. C-Murder believed he could roll his Brabus on Broadway and open fire in a nightclub entrance the broad way in broad day.

[Blogger’s Note: That’s a totally unrelated case, but it establishes character. You can catch that shit on YouTube.]

Sometimes people are unfairly pre-judged based on their rap aliases and lyrics. This is totally unfair. I just found out OJ Da Juiceman neither played professional football nor murdered a white wife. Needless to say, I’m terribly disappointed. In C-Murder’s case, we already kinda know how he gets down, music aside.

Even if C-Murder were innocent *snicker*, this shit has absolutely nothing to do with Obama. I mean, does she think the nigga is sitting in the White House or on Air Force One biting his nails over the outcome of Corey Miller’s murder retrial?

Barack Obama: [to Michelle] Honey, what’s taking you so long? Bring that donkey ass of yours over here with my unflavored Dutch Master. That C-Murder verdict is about to come down. I know I’m gonna have to clear my mind behind this shit.

Michelle Obama: [to Barack] You know I can’t roll so good with these new nails, nigga. Just pause the damn TiVo.

Barack: I know I’m finna be sick behind this. You know that’s that old bullshit, right? I mean, how they do dat dere?

Michelle: *sighing* You know these crackers don’t care about a black man. They already had a 10-2 ruling. This shit should be a mistrial. *sitting next to Barack* Alright. Unpause it, honey.

Germaine Miller: [on television] ROWWRRR! HISS WOMP ROWWR HISS ROWRRRR CHEA WOMP TOMBOUT ROWRRRRR HISS GRRRRR BLACK MAN ROWRRR GRRRRRR WHERE IS BARACK?!?!?!

Michelle: Remember your campaign promises, honey. You promised you wouldn’t let any more black people be convicted of crimes. They’re making you look like a fool. Fox News is gonna have a field day with this!

Barack: *long pause* Goddammit! Turn this motherfuckin plane around. We’re going to Louis Armstrong airport. They ‘bout got me fucked up ’round here, little daddy.

Sho’ ya right.

Questions? Comments? Requests? Now had Obama been Biden’s vice president and you got a clean shot… ron@ronmexicocity.com

  • Silly Willy

    “This reminds me of a little girl I saw on the Maury show. You may know this program by its working title, In the Case of 7-Month-Old Dontarius, Tayvon, You ARE The Father”

    ^^^^^^^^^^

    LMAO!!!! Dontarius, Ron ? Seriously?

  • Silly Willy

    You’re a disturbed genius for those dialogues, Ron. Please excuse yourself, you’ve been having too much fun

    hahahahahaha!!!!
    ROWRRRROWWWWWRRR!!!!!WTF???

  • shawnb

    THA MOUTHA FUCKIN G.O.A.T…..u done done it again ron looooooolololol to the barack/michelle convo….RON MEXICO FOR PRES. OF THE HATERS CLUB(PIERZY FOR VP)…time for bol to pack his bags and move to texas
    -sincerely SHAWNB THE SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE(of haters)

  • $ykotic/Don McCaine

    WHOOOOOOOO!

    Now someone tell me why the black president has not addressed the people in the hoods(ghetto’s, projects).

    And why he met with DMC, and NOT RUN…

  • shawnb

    cosign the ROWRRRRROWWWWWRRRRR

  • shawnb

    cosign the ROWRRRRROWWWWWWRRRR LOLOLOLOL

  • Superstar Extraordinaire

    Haahaa barack said finna….thats ignorant nigga shit….ron u r too good at makin this shit up

  • http://xxl gside

    Ya’ll get off mex nut’s he ain’t no genuine he’s a fucking physic . You knew this shit was going to happen before it happen , probably already had this shit wrote out just fill in the blanks. You knew when Obama got elected this type of niggerdom would come out ,it goes hand in hand if you got some money you can get away with anything maybe if your white and they get caught sometime . You got to be smart first have money second , look at the dummy move this nigga pull . Then see his sister , say some dumb shit like that reinforce my belief these people been taught wrong from day one . Obama say get your education then put his money where his mouth is so get your education . It seem like have money is getting nigga lock up faster than being broke so let’s try it a new way ain’t to many educated people behind bars .

    • DM

      Wow–I’m genuinely shocked at how poorly you write. You don’t even get points for trying:
      “Ya’ll get off mex nut’s he ain’t no genuine he’s a fucking physic . You knew this shit was going to happen before it happen , probably already had this shit wrote out just fill in the blanks. You knew when Obama got elected this type of niggerdom would come out ,it goes hand in hand if you got some money you can get away with anything maybe if your white and they get caught sometime . You got to be smart first have money second , look at the dummy move this nigga pull . Then see his sister , say some dumb shit like that reinforce my belief these people been taught wrong from day one . Obama say get your education then put his money where his mouth is so get your education . It seem like have money is getting nigga lock up faster than being broke so let’s try it a new way ain’t to many educated people behind bars”

      • http://xxl gside

        Man were the fuck do you we get these fake as English teacher from and since your criticizing my writing tell show were I fuck ,up at . All you did was and you bullshit comment and wrote word for word ever thing I wrote then what . Lord know I’m no Alex Hailey but who the fuck are you ,I’m going to tell you.A petty moutherfucker with a superiority complex who give a fuck this is all fun and game here you take yourself to serious. If you getting on here check in people grammar, were not getting paid for this , there’s no award for blogging go get you some pussy and a life .

        • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

          ^^^^^Classic…..

        • The Southern Comfort

          You ever talk to a homeless guy when he’s hammer drunk? he sounds like this dude writes and i mean exactly. Damn!

        • http://www.myspace.com/monstarrmacc Monstarr.

          Speaking that DRUNK ASS trrooooofff.

          Haha, definitely.

  • kelito-vision

    heard this shit on Shade 45 morning show and i thought it was a joke…lmao….is that what Black folk think Obama got elected for? smh…i’m black and i know this nigga guilty…i wasn’t sure until i saw that tape where C was shooting at niggas in the entrance of the club…that proved it to me…dude better be locked away…keep us law abiding negroes away from them type niggas

  • Around and Around

    Dam this shit was funny…

    Bush set precedent by the pardon of John Forte, only he’s actually talented.

  • ChiquitaB

    I could not STOP LAUGHING…at the Barack and Michelle dialogue..Funniest two lines i have read all week “Im finna be sick behind this you know that right” and “They bout got me f’d up round here little daddy”..TOO FUNNY Mr. Mexico :).Too GD funny :)

  • ChiquitaB

    I could not STOP LAUGHING…at the Barack and Michelle dialogue..FUNNIEST two lines I have read all week “Im finna be sick behind this you know that right” and “They bout got me f’d up round here little daddy”. TOO FUNNY Mr. Mexico :)…TOO GD FUNNY :)

  • Silly Willy

    On an unrelated note, am I the only one who saw the new feature about Detox on XXL? They made a post with Maino on some 12 steps to save hiphop…. I commented, then the whole drop just disappeared………

  • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

    Maybe if Obama sends C. Miller (he “changed his name awhile back) a lifetime supply of Newports, his sister will stop neck-rolling.

    I just love how black families turn a blind-eye to the facts in a case like this. & how dare Obama not put down his civil-rights Beer Mug to rush to the aid of a murderer. The nerve of this douche bag. All preoccupied with healthcare & the economy @ a time when one of our beloved icons is forced to deal with the reprecussions of his own decision making…..

    They may want to drop a line to Professor Gates.

  • Shawty J

    “Where’s Barack?”

    I say this as a guy that voted for Obama, people need to get off this delusion that he’s some messiah or superhero. Even if he was, the idea that Obama is gonna hand off a presidential pardon to C-Murder is ludicrous.

    • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

      ^^^Huh?

      You must be new here?

      There’s not a cognizant person in America who thinks Obama’s a messiah or superhero.

  • http://www.myspace.com/emcdlthemusicprofile EmCDL

    Damn Ron that shit was hillarious!

    “C-Murder believed he could roll his Brabus on Broadway and open fire in a nightclub entrance the broad way in broad day.”

    LMAO!!!

  • BIGNAT

    “Believe me. I checked the mailbox repeatedly for my O.J. pass. Nothing.”
    shit if that was true some fool would fuck up so bad in one day. the rest would be null in void.

  • AZ40

    Barack: *long pause* Goddammit! Turn this motherfuckin plane around. We’re going to Louis Armstrong airport. They ‘bout got me fucked up ’round here, little daddy

    thast shit is mad funny…YOU knew every black person was gonna feel a sense of entitlement seeing how the new H.N.I.C is a nigga

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  • Brooklyn

    that dialogue was funny as hell, that shit had me rolling. niggas are a trip, as if obama doesn’t have enough to deal with leading a country, trying to get that healthcare bill passed, and fending off them “crackers” that oppose his every move. really, he should stop what he’s doing to prevent some ignorant ass mediocre rapper from going to jail. before this, i never even heard of c-murder, i can’t even name one of dude’s songs.

  • Yessir

    Ignorant SHIT…..

  • Blackwestie

    I honestly dont know where y’all on this site get off having a go at c-murder. An innocent man lost his freedom. He’ll never be able to hold his 3 daughters in his arm’s again and all you can do is joke bout it! y’all trying to judge him on an earlier incident that the d.a leaked to the media hoping any potential jurors seen this so they’d have their minds made up before the trial was even up. If any of you stupid ass motherfuckers even took a minute and decided to read the facts of this case maybe you wouldnt be as quick to judge. There was no evidence against c-murder, no weapon, no gun residue on clothes, nobody even seen a gun in his hand for fuck sake!
    4 witness’s said it wasnt cee, that he was at da dj box. all the prosecution had was 2 witness’s who the d.a cleared their charges for(bribe). sure one of the witness’s underage girlfriend murdered their new born baby after this incident and the witness was being charged for carnel knowledge until they found out he worked as a bouncer in the club when the shooting took place and dropped the chrage if he’d say it was cee who shot steve thomas. closing statments the d.a gave the jury a nudge,nudge,wink,wink saying ‘come on guys u all know this guy is a thug’! wtf! it should have been a mistrial but the judge sent them back in and obviously the jury changed their minds jus to get the trial over with cuz they were tired and felt pressured and jus wanted to go home as they admitted. So before all u stupid motherfuckers that are so quick to judge, read the facts beofre coming on here typing shit u know nothing bout! if anything we should be on here supporting the release of c-murder and fellow black people wrongfully imprisioned
    FREE C-MURDER

  • http://www.yahoo.com Dreez

    This stupid NIGGER diserved his time every freakin minute, second of it. Do the crime…he should have been hung.