Did Brisco get pistol whipped?

[Taking off for the Chi again tomorrow, so I'm publishing Friday's post a bit early. Enjoy! -- Bol]

Does Brisco not have the Internets?

Earlier today I saw on Nah Right, in the sidebar, the same place where I saw the link to the post by Peter Rosenberg, where it said that Brisco had been severely beaten and robbed. It said he’d been pistol whipped, just like Big Pun’s lazy, ungrateful wife. I only ever heard of Brisco from that time he said he was gonna kick the shit out of Yung Berg for making fun of Flo Rida’s receding hairline. So, I figured Yung Berg may have paid some goons to pay him a visit. Twitter came back online just in time for me to share as much with people the world over.

Later on, I saw where Brisco told XXL he didn’t he hadn’t been assaulted, and I figured there must have been some sort of mistake. Maybe some other black guy got pistol whipped and robbed, and 5-0 couldn’t tell the difference between him and Brisco. You know how police stay arresting black people for crimes committed by other black people who look kinda similar. And they’re even more clueless when it comes to hip-hop. For a good 10 years after 2Pac and Biggie Smalls were assassinated, they kept trying to tie every hip-hop-related crime to some East Coast-West Coast beef. There’s probably some random, clueless white guy trying to figure out who killed Biggie Smalls as we speak.

But come to find out Brisco was probably just lying. Or trying to save face. I saw on the Awl, which I don’t necessarily check for hip-hop news (but which runs some good hip-hop stories none the less) where they had video of Brisco getting robbed and pistol whipped. It’s been all over the local news down in Florida. There’s a great interview with a cop, who jokes Brisco got a little bit more off of the top than he expected, that this robbery was “off the chain,” and that, for a rapper to have his bling taken, they might as well have taken his heart. No, really.Even old white people who wouldn’t know from Flo Rida, let alone Brisco himself, know Brisco got robbed and pistol whipped. What the fuck was he thinking, saying he didn’t?

Brisco told XXL he wasn’t assaulted, but that he was in a barber shopped that got robbed, and it was just a matter of him being in the wrong place at the wrong time. What that’s supposed to mean, I’m not sure. He may have been trying to let us know that he wasn’t specifically targeted – the perps just got really lucky that day. XXL, in its headline and in the actual story, makes it sound as if he did get robbed, but he didn’t get pistol whipped. Which makes it sound like there was a robbery, someone else got pistol whipped, but when it was Brisco’s turn, he was just like, “Here, take my shit. You don’t even have to threaten me. Here’s my wallet, $35,000 in jewelry, which I just so happened to be wearing to a motherfucking barber shop, the keys to my Range Rover, and how about the shirt off my back, while I’m at it?”

It would have been more heroic, if he actually admitted to putting up a struggle and having to be pistol whipped. Which is not to say that I would have put up a struggle. If I were sitting in a barber shop, wearing $35,000 worth of jewelry, with $1,000 in cash in a Louis Vuitton wallet (which is kinda gay), and I ended up getting robbed, I’d just have to charge it to the game. The shirt off my back wouldn’t be an issue. I couldn’t run the risk of any women noticing my (old) manly physique while I walk home. I don’t know if I could handle that, emotionally. But then I wouldn’t be sitting in a barber shop with that much expensive shit on me anyway. As Owen Wilson would say, Brisco is a damn fool, if he thinks he wasn’t specifically targeted. A damn fool. He probably walks around with that much shit on all the time, and goons were just waiting to catch him slipping.

Say what you will about Soulja Boy (and I have), but I’ll give him credit for learning from his mistakes. You used to see him in videos all the time bragging about how much money he had and how much shit he had in his house. Then goons ran up in his crib and took it. Now, when you see him bragging about how much money he has, it’s at a no tell motel, where he bangs that guy A-rab. Brisco, being Flo Rida’s weed carrier might not have any choice but to come outside with no jewelry on from now on anyway.

  • AZ40

    He gave it up smooth, he ain’t wanna hear the bang…

  • GRAND PRIX

    PIERZY!

    BOL,U CRAZIER THAN A MUFUCKA(“NOW WHEN U SEE HIM BRAGGING BOUT HOW MUCH MONEY HE GOT,ITS AT A NO TELL MOTEL WHERE HE BANGS DAT GUY ARAB”)..BUT YEA,I DONT THINK IT FUCKS UP HIS STREET CRED CUZ ANYBODY CAN GET JACKED,ESPECIALLY IN DA HOOD(SHIT,EVEN MAJOR WEIGHT PUSHERS GET THEY PRODUCT KNOCKED OFFF FROM TIME TO TIME,ITS PART OF DA GAME)..BUT I WOUKDNT HAVE BEEN WEARING ALL DAT CUZ I KNOW HOW NIGGAS GET

  • Enlightened

    Nigga you a fool!

    That white police officer had jokes for real though. That “a little more off the top than he expected” shit was classic!

    But in his defense, I really didn’t see the pistol whipping in the video.

    It look like all them niggas just hit the ground quick as hell and started taking they shit off, but I have to look at it again to be sure…

  • Enlightened

    Ok. Just watched it again, the headline even says, “pistol whipped and everything.”
    I still can’t see it. Is it just me. Somebody point me to the pistol whipping if you see it but…

    niggas really gotta appreciate that bullshit police officers comedic timing…
    dude really do that shit with a straight face

    “this robbery was off the chain” yeah… literally mu’fucka. That’s crazy!!

    And oh yeah, that news bitch at the very beginning could get it. I’m surprised you didn’t mention her Bol…

    Oh yeah, you don’t like your white bitches slim and actually halfway good looking

  • http://youtube.com/federalranga Federal Ranga

    Brisco ain’t gonna learn… you know how many mufuckaz was watching his ass when he shot that I’m in the hood video?

    I said it before and I’ll say it again… I SWEAR that looks like the barbershop I get my shit done at every two weeks… I hope not…

    Commission!!! New vlog up.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5lO2D9palS0

  • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

    Maybe it just me, but the whole “I didn’t get pistol-whipped angle” seems counterproductive, for a dude like Brisco.

    He had all that shit on for bitches to begin with, although we still don’t know who the gay rapper is , yet. He probably bought that Range bitches in mind. Like most niggas with money for no reason, it’s all about impressing bitches. So, why wouldn’t he admit to getting beat up with a gun, so the bitches would feel sorry for him? It’s not like he can drive them to the swapmeet anymore.

    I bet he had a gun in the car, too. Nigga should be thanking God right now that he didn’t get Vernon Forested.

    Berg even had to pull his face out of a 13 year old’s lap to laugh @ this, I’m sure.

    • Worley

      Co-sign Grand$. Brisco is very lucky they didn’t put him to sleep and so are they. The whole sh*t was on camera (not tape, people don’t really use tape anymore).

      I didn’t see the pistol whipping either. The funniest part, however, is it looks like they went through the barber’s pockets and couldn’t find his money. Dude then reached under his huge belly into his pocket and gave them something. Now that sh*t and the cop in the press conference had me rolling.

      Hold ya head Brisco. Those n*ggas set you up. Shi*t happens fella.

  • $ykotic/Don McCaine

    1. Dude blogged about Berg, why not blog and discredit the pistol-whipping? Show the no-bruises profile!

    2. The cop PLAYED him. Big time.

    3. Hope the guy on the phone has his bags packed.

    Heard Ross’ Maybach caught some metal termites.

    Seems like them Miami fans want there $ back!

    Watch out Plies…

  • RAWshad

    Bol… did your King Hippo Punch Out looking ass even see the video? Brisco never got pistol whipped, dude dipped to the floor quick to live another day. There was like 4 niggas with guns, that nigga is not dumb.

    He didn’t even got touch. Just robbed. SMH.

    • http://myspace.com/devitan Devi Gargon

      To RaWshad
      “King Hippo Punch Out looking ass”

      I never thought that before, but damn if you aint had me rolling!!!!!!

      About Brisco, I’m not gonna bother watching it. Getting yapped is an occupational hazard!

      Co – Sign to Grand Prix

      Pushers get their weight knocked off, and you just gotta do OT and take the L.

  • capcobra

    brisco chain got everybody robbed…lol.

  • Big Say

    Brisco needs to go holla at officer ricky and go get his chain back!

  • http://www.justice.gov.za GO-Getta’

    Whether dude got pistol whipped or handed his land rover keys & jewelry like a pussy does’nt matter.
    @ least he did’nt try 2 sweep it under the carpet & denied the robbery.Sh**t happens,bol,he should have known better.

  • http://www.mikestreezy.com mike streezy

    Now this is where all the hustlas out there tryin to make it in the biz can pick a few thangs up. We are about to see damage control and so far its not looking good Brisco. It will be interesting to see how folks try to spin this situation.

    It also teaches us that folks aint makin money in the rap biz so insurance claims are the way to go if you wanna get all that money you paid to lease a chain and a range back before they repo that ish!

    Peep the free music Ive got for you out at http://www.mikestreezy.com and I’m the artist of the week at http://www.onthagrind.net! Holla at ya boy!

  • RAWshad

    All I am saying is this. Dude, Brisco, got robbed randomly @ a barbershop. 4 niggas with GUNS came in and you expected his ass to fight back with 4 niggas with GUNS? He dipped to the floor cuz the nigga ain’t dumb, let them take his chain, money, car, whatever, he can get those back, but you can’t get your life back.

    Bol think Brisco be on his Max Payne shit. Most of yall niggas would shit in your pants if you was ever robbed gun point like that.

  • http://www.aspnradio.com Kevin

    Love your blog, great stuff and I am a random clueless white guy. That is why I read your stuff. Trying to get a clue……..

    This is a great quote “some random, clueless white guy trying to figure out who killed Biggie Smalls as we speak”

  • http://myspace.com/atlatino404 El Tico Loco

    He ain’t the first rapper to get robbed, and he won’t be the I actually thought that was a rite of passage.

    • http://www.myspace.com/atlatino404 El Tico Loco

      *won’t be the last.

  • http://xxl All Dae

    If Bol got robbed I’d feel bad and keep it moving. Brisco getting robbed is more like getting Got….cause dude knows better than to wear that much bling at the barbershop a.k.a. the guy/thug/gang/mobster hangout.

    He shouldn’t feel ashamed for not taking a bullet. Life is not worth all the money in the world. Better to take the sting of the hip hop community clowning yr ass…even 5-0 busted his balls than to be murked like Stack Bundles.

    I don’t listen to homie but will be hard to hear him talk greesy after getting Got…homie should have brought his grip with him.

  • calimovement

    Bol I thought you had some good jokes….but damn…the cop really did say that shit on the video….hilarious

  • geico lizard

    “It said he’d been pistol whipped, just like Big Pun’s lazy, ungrateful wife.”
    ^
    Roffle

    That cops lyrics>>>Brisco entire rap career

    • DetroitDraper

      Hey you get the best comment award specifically handed out by me in Detroit dun dun dun lol…Naw but that shit was funny as hell.

      MAYNE HOL’ UP

  • ross alert

    ^^^Kevin is a Rick Ross, read between the lines…

  • vhingrhamesonyo’momma

    At least the nigga was smart enough not to die over some punk ass metal. Ere’ nigga in the world would’ve done the same shit or been colostemy bag bound.

  • $ykotic/Don McCaine

    “That street medicine is going good for me…”-Brisco on ABCTV

    “I’ma just get bigger chains, better jewerly…”

    Your new rap heroes are dry snitching.

    No pistol-whip evidence, so that’s bogus.

    But looking @ the new footage, dude with the beard is wolf and hyena food.

  • Isee

    What if homey just pulled a stunt to get a buzz going? Rappers, not emcees, but rappers are really desperate for attention these days.

    • Enlightened

      I didn’t think about it but in this day and age that is very possible. Sad to say, but a nigga would do something like that nowadays

  • for real

    bol you should take your picture down homie.. youz a ugly motherfucker. for real

  • Teddy

    this comes to mind

    Rick Ross – Hustling Lyrics-

    “Whip it real hard whip it whip it real hard
    I caught a charge, I caught a charge
    Whip it real hard, whip it whip it real hard”

  • MIAMI NIGGA

    He did the right thing by laying down. He was in Liberty City, I’m from that area and trust me dudes get murked all the time out here for bucking the jack. What yall cant see in the video is that they let off 3 shots when they entered. What would you do?????? I dont know where yall from but anybody gets it down here if they slippin. You can have 10 bodies and we dont respect that. Its gutter on the other side of the bridge!

  • MIAMI NIGGA

    Actually the barbershop was in lil Haiti at the border of Liberty City. But its all hood!

  • Deuce53

    y’all aint even mentioning this was in his home state…ill even get my CSI on and explain how it prolly went down; he came in, wearing all his shit, one of the customers got froggy, called his goons, and its a rap…end, but yea, id rather come up out all that shit before dyin, it aint worth it

  • http://youtube.com/federalranga Federal Ranga

    Well then, Fed doesn’t give a fuck then. I get my shit chopped in Opa-Locka.

  • giantstepp

    Where Im from in the black community the barber shop is a respected institution and has always been. It’s one of the rare places in the hood where you have all types of blackmen sitting side by side kicking it without reservations. The barbers are usually from that same hood too. IDK, but it’s just hard to see dudes randomly running up and robbing the Bshop. It’s kinda been unofficially off limits to even the goons. I think dude was targeted!

  • Rob

    I think that its some bullshit that anyone would make a negative blog or comment about what happen. I don’t necessarly like Brisco as a rapper and think he says some ignorant things but this is a man’s life we are talkin about. These niggas came in and were shootin, that man could have easily gotten it and it coulda been a different story. He did the right thing by cooperating and letting them have his jewels and money. What he did after he got robbed probably wasn’t the smartest thing but people needa lay off the blogs if they are gonna talk shit about someone getting robbed after shots fired. This shit ain’t cool at all.