Sticky Fingaz: Shit Happens

[VIDEO: Sticky Fingaz Speaks On Accidentally Shooting Luce Cannon]

At age 28, I’m apparently a geriatric for knowing Sticky Fingaz as the face of Onyx. The youngsters who aren’t exactly hip to my jive may know Sticky for his work as a bit part actor in their favorite mind-numbing hood movies. He lived out the worst parts of both mediums’ messages last week when he shot friend and collaborator Luce Cannon in the leg while showing off a “baby” Desert Eagle.

For those who know a little more about guns than what can be gathered from rap lyrics, the “Baby Eagle” is a diminutive version of its absentee father, but is still available in up to .45 ACP–so, you can’t treat it like a “Savanna Canary” or some shit.

You might catch a hot one in the leg for that.

In the corresponding video, TMZ attains footage of an impromptu interview with a visibly inebriated Sticky Fingaz. Rather, I can only hope he’s fucked up. You never know. Some of these guys get to a point where they just look like that all the time. But, I digress. After showing surprise at the incident being public domain, Sticky reminds viewers that poppin one into your homeboy’s shin is the kind of accident anyone’s prone to having.

As he says, “Shit happens.”

I can only imagine the “shit” that “happened” leading up to Luce Cannon catching hot shrapnel. Why the fuck would a nigga be waving a loaded Eagle around anyway? He couldn’t have at least put the safety on before living out the part in Paper Soldiers he wished he’d landed?

Am I the only nigga who finds great irony in the fact that Sticky shot a nigga named Luce Cannon? I can’t be. In which case, I really see no problem with the following situation:

With DJ Drama and Don Cannon’s “Cannon” playing in the background, Sticky Fingaz and Luce Cannon smoke a couple non-regulation blunts and down a fifth of Hennessy before their usual Friday night new cannon unveiling ceremony. After Cannon shows Sticky–a known loose cannon himself–a newly cannonized hand cannon, Sticky reaches into the cannon duffel for his own. Due to inebriation, Sticky forgets that his cannon is neither empty, nor set to safety. While attempting a hand-to-hand hand cannon transfer, Sticky catches his long nail on the trigger, firing a round into Cannon’s shin. After 10 minutes of incoherent apology and alibi development, Sticky turns off Underclassman, starring Nick Cannon, and calls someone to take Cannon to the hospital.

From one loose cannon to a loose cannon and Luce Cannon, I see no problem with this. For example: Hypothetically, if I had a homie called Smoke Stack and we challenge him to smoke an entire quarter ounce of BC in one sitting, and he gets about halfway through the bag before he thinks he’s gone blind… no one should be at fault. That’s just Smoke being Smoke, right?

Hopefully this tool was properly licensed. We already know Sticky likes to toy around with the unregisterd Tonkas with mad G.I. Joe and Ken dolls on em already. At least this time the nigga pulling a Plaxico didn’t Plaxicate himself.

Questions? Comments? Requests? Umm… Cannon! ron@ronmexicocity.com

  • westcoastaggie

    Good Grief.

    I hope he wasn’t in NY when the baby cannon went off. He doesn’t have the money Plexiglass has.

  • Pierzy

    I miss Onyx…not the Triggernometry but Bacdafucup, All We Got Iz Us & Shut Em Down ’98. They did their shit. You know, before Sticky became Blade and Fredro decided to do a few seasons of “Moesha”

  • 1hunid

    “At least this time the nigga pulling a Plaxico didn’t Plaxicate himself”

    As if i wasnt already cracking up by the time i got that part. Aces bruh!

  • OG Matt Herbz

    Haha…that was *CANNON* funny. Huh? What the *CANNON* was that? There *CANNON* goes again. Yo, Mex,*CANNON* something ain’t*CANNON* here. Mex?*CANNON* Fuck*CANNON* No,*CANNON* fu*CANNON* *CANNON*

    –*CANNON* att H*CANNON* z

  • anutha_level

    “I can only hope he’s fucked up. You never know. Some of these guys get to a point where they just look like that all the time.”

    u know…i was thinking the same shit. take old school Sam Perkins who used to play in the NBA back in the day. you NEVA knew if that nigga was blazed during a game. kinda like lamar odom these days……hmm

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      sam perkins ALWAYS looked high! he played like he was kissing the sky too!

      2 points.

      well… 3, because it’s sam perkins we’re talking about.

  • Jamal7Mile

    I’m having some problems with my computer (memory) so the ads don’t pop up and I can’t always see them. But I’m willing to bet there’s a gun shop ad on this page somewhere.

    Come on now, the fake Gucci/LV ads showed up when Rick Ross got called out on them shades!

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      no gun ads, thank de lawd. just iar and u-god

  • $ykotic

    Mexx’ ratchet IQ is on high…

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      higher than it should be. sad to say.

  • foolio_iglesias

    Public inPlaxication=felonious.

  • http://xxl gside

    How does this nigga sticky stay working he like the poorman Will Smith .

    • BIGNAT

      poor man will smith LMAO more like a low budget ice cube. sticky be in them barely breaking even movies.

      “At least this time the nigga pulling a Plaxico didn’t Plaxicate himself.” oh man i am going try to work plaxicate into my vocabulary. good post ron ron you killing these clowns. you keep fucking around they going start trying to come after you. like the stuff bol had to deal with. “sticky catches his long nail on the trigger, firing a round into Cannon’s shin. After 10 minutes of incoherent apology and alibi development ” i bet the first thing he said nigga you going be aight it’s just a leg wound. when i was on the blade show i dealt with tougher shit than that

  • DV8

    LMAO!!!!!!!

    this sounds like the Chappelle skit “Zapped” in real life.

    You know Sticky could have been aiming at someone else, but with the cock-eye and all……..shit happens.

    • KF UK

      Thats fucking hilarious! HAHAHAHAHAH

  • Azhar

    Am I the only nigga who finds great irony in the fact that Sticky shot a nigga named Luce Cannon? I can’t be. In which case, I really see no problem with the following situation:

    LMFAO!!!!Ron Mex dunn dunnit again, roll up!

  • ?

    LMAO!
    Omg that Luce Cannon line had me dying.

  • janklow

    i just miss the days before the introduction of the Desert Eagle when Jerichos were called Jerichos and there was no usage of this shitty “Baby Eagle” rebranding

  • janklow

    i just miss the days before the introduction of the Desert Eagle when Jerichos were called Jerichos and there was no usage of this “Baby Eagle” rebranding

  • BGZ

    Sticky for Republican VP 2012

  • KF UK

    “For example: Hypothetically, if I had a homie called Smoke Stack and we challenge him to smoke an entire quarter ounce of BC in one sitting, and he gets about halfway through the bag before he thinks he’s gone blind… no one should be at fault. That’s just Smoke being Smoke, right?”

    Thats one of your funniest lines ever mex.

    But to be fai my dude id take your smoke challange, id conquer a quarter for jokes!!! LMAO

    Bring it on!

    • Capital G

      I laughed at the Smoke Stack scenario myself. The only problem I had with it was the BC reference. Fuckin’ BC? The Beast? Mex gotta know that’s some regular ol’ seedless bullshit. Up top in NY you got that good ol’ piff, some Sour D, or even a million different strains of Kush. Leave that BC shit to the youngins that call it “dro”.

  • iquell

    LOL @ CANNON! I can hear the adlib in the background

  • Around and Around

    That’s some good shit… Was there a video more cold then Onyx & Biohazard.

    Anyone that knows how to correctly carry a CANNNON knows you never trust a saftey for shit.

    I’ve seen them go off on saftey, it’s a mechanical and like the US auto industry it can fail.

  • bongolock

    aw man toooo many quotables!

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  • EReal

    Sticky’s long pinky nail – FTW!

  • East Saint Louis 618

    “Sticky turns off Underclassman, starring Nick Cannon, and calls someone to take Cannon to the hospital” that had me weak as hell.. ron u a mad genius.