The Kanye Code: What Would Jeezy Do? [WWJD?]

“Every time I write a chorus or any type of hook, I say like, ‘What would [Young] Jeezy do?’ You know how niggas be like, ‘What would Jesus do?’ Our shit is like, ‘What would Jeezy do? What would Jeezy say on this record?” At the end of the day, I make my shit straight white T-shirt-ready.” -Kanye West, Def Jam Conference Call

Word, Kanye? What would Jeezy do? I can see the wristbands now.

I’m no biblical scholar, but according to the book of 1 Jeezy, third chapter, sixteenth verse, the golden rule of white tee-ready music is to include as many adlibs as possible. The danger of religion, however, is that scripture is always open to interpretation. Some rapster sects believe that when addressing the Atlanta congregation Jeezy is implying that “snow” is more important than “DEEEEEAAAAAAMMMNN!” Others believe that the high-energy, workout-ready melodies are the true foundation of Jeezyism.

The kid in me likes the frosted side. The grown-up is all about the enriched wheat flour that gives the block 12 essential vitamins and minerals.

Here I am thinking that Kanye West is the most self-centered, megalomaniacal, Napoleonic beast of an artist that rap music has ever seen, when really he is a man of faith and humble servant of the “YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHH!!!”

Standing corrected, I now see the Jeezy influence in Kanye’s recent white-tee bangers such as “Love Lockdown” and “Heartless.” I would have thought the aforementioned dope-boy anthems reflected more of a devotion to Paintology, but clearly I don’t know shit about shit. Like I said, I’m no biblical scholar or religion expert. I’m the homo-loving heathen blogger, remember?

It’s not my place to test or question one’s piety, but I do wonder if Kanye–now having officially announced his religious affiliation–will go as far as some Jeezy extremists have in recent history. Some followers of Jeezyism have gone as far as intentionally crashing expensive foreign sportscars, circling police checkpoints intoxicated, opening fire outside of nightspots and taking massive turkey shits in recording studios.

Other practicing Jeezyists have housed Katrina victims, conducted toy drives in underprivileged neighborhoods and fucked with John McCain.

It will indeed be interesting to see how Kanye continues to manifest his devotion to this increasingly popular sect of the Christian faith. As 808s and Heartbreak looms, I’m sure those who follow Kanye as he follows Jeezy will be paying closest attention.

Questions? Comments? Requests? Still haven’t called the toll-free number for your personal prayer package?

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  • DJ Knox

    1st!!! Wow, that blog was a shit-sandwich, seasoned with a crackhead’s urine and a side of month-old weed. XXL has negro please, and this blog should make it…now whee’s the real entertainment…G.U.K.?


      Hey Ron Mexico u pussy nigga when I catch you its over nigga when the doggs catch you its str8 over. Hey DJ don’t lump me in w/ this pussy ass blogger Nigga I’m an Ebangin ass janitor gangsta. I would address this bitch ass nigga I got shit to clean so I’m out. But For real DJ Knox Ron Mexico got sex’d into XXL Staff. Gyant used to pipe him back in his SOHH Dayz. Hey ron u want to fucc w/ this 2 time Junior Crip of the year!! Nigga you better cancel X-Mas cause you won’t even see New Years!!!! That’s on Crip Cuz!

  • amar

    wow kanye must be dillusional from swallowing too much of young’s jeezy. He claims that he makes his shit white t ready, and then releases 3 singles where he’s crying over a cheating bitch? Young jeezy would NOT do that.

    Young jeezy’s a realist. He knows gold diggers aren’t dating his ugly ass for the long-term. So instead of whining about it, the man just finds another girl to sniff snow off his jetski dick.

  • Lowedwn

    I think KanYeezy drank some of the Jim Jones Kool-Aid b4 that interview. The 808s album is some G.O.O.D Deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaamn music though.

  • Queens Boy

    i am completely speechless…

  • geico lizard

    if you join the church of jeezy he wants 10% of your gross income not your net so get that shit right before you write the check niggas,lmfao. i guess he wanted to say ANY def jam artist except jay-z was his inspiration. next time he will say ludacris.

  • Pierzy

    Yo Mex, maybe Kanye should’ve named his album “17.5 & Snowman” because that is what is really consuming his mind (and heart)

  • geico lizard

    jeezy was hoping you wouldnt remember that mccain quote he said ron, just because it was on tape doesnt mean they didnt misquote him,LOL. im sure daddy yankee sold alot of his cologne at the rnc after he endorsed mccain.

  • tony grand$

    Poor Mr. West. The collapse of his mind continues. Although I’m startin’ to wonder if this nigga is just REALLY good @ saying shit that makes ppl talk about him. They say any publicity is good publicity. Dude beatin’ up photogs, cryink on records like he’s a therapists wet dream, classic symptons of a man that will go as far as suicide just to go out on top. Lol @ him being his own “stan” though.

  • OG Matt Herbz

    I went to church a couple times, but left because I realized it is not the best place to get some dome. Fuck Kanghey and Jizzy. That’s some stupid shit like, “Damn, I’m not enough of a fucking man to write some shit from a man’s point of view…hmm…what would Jeezy say?” Gay ass nigga.

    –OG Matt Herbz–

  • Sonic

    Ill admit that ‘Ye makes some good music but this cat is feeling himself WAAAAAAAAAAAY too much. maybe the bitch was cheating on him because he’s an arrogant prick?

  • anutha_level

    what happened to that letter to trick trick blog? guess the powers that be tryin to look out for their investment eh?

    • tony grand$

      Thought I was the only bloke wonderin bout that, AL. Hmmmph, I figga’d it wouldve been there @ least thru the weekend. Can’t even find it in the archives. Any conspiracy theories?…….


    my friend was saying remember kanye said and when you get on he leave your ass for a white girl. now that white girl that jeezy is talking about in his music is cocaine. that means kanye did not mean anything about fucking with white women when he made that song. he was talking about drugs now that kanye has made it super international star big. he is messing with that white girl he sniffing that shit.

  • the r

    kanye is one gullible ass nigga…i wouldn’t be surprised if he becomes a scientologist…didn’t common diss jeezy a while back…

  • tony grand$

    Yo, if Kanye does become a scientologist (a la Isaac Hayes), prepare for “the Snowman” to transform into the dirty south’s most prominent motivational speaker next. Thanks, but no thanks.

  • FlapJack

    What Would Jeezy Do is nothing new. I’ve been waiting on that t-shirt. It’s a great way to live. You know Jeezy does excactly what he wants regardless.
    Jeezy quotables:

    “Four shots to the chest, why niggas get at me? They done fucked around and fucked up my new white t”

    “My president is black, my lambo’s blue, and i be god damned if my rims aint to”

    “It goes: Hillary Clinton, Barrack Obama, make the world trap or die, ax DJ Drama”

    dude is hilarious

    honorable mention
    The retard-adlib on “I hustle”

  • TCUK

    Mexico you still blogging? Trick Trick not found your mama’s basement yet? If Trick Trick does’nt G-UNOT KILLA will!