Me last night watching EweToube: “Busta, NOOOOOOOOOO!”
Y’all see I tried to be nice by NOT roasting this nigga for coming out looking like a 6-month pregnant Bumpy Johnson at the Hip-Hop Honors. I even ignored “Arab Money” for as long as possible in hopes that he didn’t go with the Soulja Boy pronunciation of the ethnicity.
Much like #10 Superhead when she doesn’t get her way, I held my breath for no reason.
After finally indulging in the Ron Browz track and Tim Westwood presentation, I have decided I live too close to Brooklyn. I need to move before the next Bin Laden mixtape comes out with that Busta Rhymes response.
“It’s Arab, mother bitch!”
I was sure Atlanta would catch a bad one first since they escaped 9/11 un-planed. When Young Dro dropped “Taliban Banks,” I thought it was their time for sure, Shawty.
Don’t look at me like that. Please don’t tell me I’m the only one who remembers “Taliban Banks.”
“–Suicide doors like bombers. How it ‘pose ta be./
Jawin’ like Obama plus Osama buy dro from me./
Mosque smell like potpourri… Opium and groceries…/”
Jesus, people. That shit was hotter that applefruit. I feared the backlash would be more so.
From culturally insensitive lyrics to stereotypical corner store sound, Busta’s bringing us back to 2002. DJ Quik and Just Blaze had some ‘splainin to do behind “Addictive” and “React.” I wonder why no one’s up in arms about this track. I guess since thems was Injuns it’s different. In Amurrca we can get on the lufa falafel boys and won’t nobody say nothin.
I mean… Whatever he said, then I’m that.
As one of Mr. Smith’s supporters since LONS days, I didn’t want to condemn Busta without a fair trial. I took this shit to the corner store for myself and asked Habibi what the fuck they was sayin on the hook. He gave me that look like I just wiped my ass with his favorite page out the Koran. Then he asked me who the rapper was.
Of course, I told him it was Soulja Boy. When he finds out it’s Busta, some shit is finna jump off across that bridge, ya dig?
Worse than the song is that fuckin dance! What’s that supposed to be? Is he shakin a bomb up? Is that the Krylon can he used to draw the image of Mohammed on the side of his local public library?
Question of the Day: What kind of moron comes to the radio to debut a fucking dance anyway?
Negro, please. Busta, what the fuck are you letting dread sell you? I got a 2-year-old cousin who does that dance whenever the Backyardigans sing a song he likes. This whole midlife crisis thing fucked you up for real, though.
Alright, everyone. Whenever Arab Money comes on the radio I need you to bury your head in sand to show that you’re not part of the Busta Rhymes/B.O.M.B. listenership.
Questions? Comments? Requests? Seen 4 A-rabs in a Navigator with the AC blasting recently? firstname.lastname@example.org
P.S.: If you can “shake your money” you most certainly do not have A-rab money. You might got “keeping my Citibank account active” cash, but yeen’t got that “keep a golf course green in the middle of Cursed Earth” bread.