NEGRO PLEASE: So Juelz Santana Didn’t Catch a Yung Berg?

[Editor's Note: "Blogger's Note" has been taken over by Ron Mexico until further notice.]

“Bottom line, my former manager, along with an ex-group member, accepted an astronomical amount of money for a paid date that never happened or was ever brought to my knowledge. I was NOT robbed… My staff and I were kicked out of our orginal hotel for the commotion. The promoter, myself, and my Dipset associate Blackadon worked out the outstanding issue like bosses do.” -Juelz Santana, [all the fuck over] XXLMag.com [already]

So Juelz didn’t get “robbed.” He was forcibly relieved of his personal belongings. I get it.

You don’t win a “Negro Please” for getting robbed, but how you gonna act like yeen’t catch a Yung Berg?

Since Bol already beat the fuck out of this one I’m only gonna chime in a couple important points of principle.

According to Bol’s Saturday Night Workout (America’s Second Finest News Source), Santana the Great claims the polices were called (by a “Dipset associate,” not Juelz) and relocated the rapper’s party to a secret location like the ones you hear about on your favorite radio station. Clearly London isn’t Santana’s Town and The Mighty Dipshits were discovered by some thugs–I mean, other bosses, who robbed settled with the party to the tune of a $70,000 debt.

First, this whole shit is straight out of “The Story of Gangstalicious.”

“A! I ain’t request no police presence. I ain’t need them to take me to some secretive, safer hotel. These ain’t nothin’ but some niggas I used to owe money to when I was in the drug game. A! I was fuckin this bitch, right… and then the police bust like like ‘Yo, Juelz… You gotta come with us.’ I was all bustin a nut and ain’t have no time to get to react. A! Juelz Santana love tha pussy! A! So, yeah… they took me to this other hotel butt nekkid and I ain’t have no choice. If I’d have known they was comin’ I’d have shot em, ya dig? I’m a boss! A!

I mean… I wasn’t lookin for no police, but I ain’t mad. They supposed to do that. That’s why they downstairs now… They supposed to be there… You sure? Ain’t no police downstairs?! A?!”

Silly anecdote aside, there’s no way Santana didn’t request police protection on his own. Granted I’m not from the UK and have never been, but in civilized nations one can deny police protection if they so choose. Otherwise it’s kidnapping.

I know several victims of domestic violence and all kinds of foul shit who can’t get a cop to show up until someone’s lying in a pool of blood like a fuckin newborn baby out this motherfucker. Part of the reason why the police suck so much balls is their unwillingness to protect those who really need it. Yet, here’s Juelz getting forcible unwanted police intervention.

If I give Juelz the benefit of the doubt and concede that his entourage fucked him over with a both a shady tour obligation and made him look like a bitch with all that unwanted police protection, he’s still responsible. Thems yo’ niggas. Ask Mike Vick about the Community Property of Niggerdom. Besides, If it’s supposed to be as gully as Santana makes this  all seem those “Dipset associates” are supposed to be handling that muscle, no? Or is it more like Dipset the Movie where homie’s got the 2-for-5 purple tops and no biscuit?

I know it’s wildly illegal to be holding out there, but I remember a video with Juelz, Cam’ron and Jimmy in better days rolling around London with Tim Westwood. If they’re connected like that, they should have a couple of shooters on the team like the Lakers and post up… You know. Hit ‘em with the toaster from long distance or close up. (Name that rapper.)

As Bol also alluded before my internet went out I got the chance, maybe Cam set the whole shit up. If he hasn’t sold the rights to those oh-so-gulliver SAS chaps, they might have taken some time out from their busy crumpet-eating, polo-shopping schedules to handle some blinky work.

Alls I’m sayin is if some dude with a Chelsea Football Club jersey and blurred face pops up on EweToube with the “A” chain I’ll just die.

What’s the official Santana settlement explanation for why niggas are coming after him anyway? Did he buy some new bathing apes with that 70Gs? Did he think the shit was a campaign contribution or some shit? If I get a mysterious bump in my scrilla stack I’m gonna ask a couple of questions before something fucked up happens. What the fuck was Juelz thinking?

“Yo my bad. I spent this paper I ain’t earn and they just came through to make it right.”

Negro, please. This boi argument got more holes in it than Sarah Palin’s Obama attack last night.

Again, I’m not knockin Juelz for some niggas having gotten the drop. It happens to the best, especially when playing away games. Just don’t lie to us, LaRon. Biggie was able to man up and admit that Lil’ Cease crippled him by opening the door for the cops. No one will think any less of you for admitting the same.

Questions? Comments? Requests? Trynna go to rehab? ron@ronmexicocity.com

“Besides, Juelz without a pistol, probably couldnt fight off Amy Winehouse on a crack binge.” -Trouble (on Bol’s blog)

Applaud that man.

  • Pierzy

    Mex, doesn’t this just prove how much of a herb Juelz really is? Dude is garbage through-and-through. I’m just relieved that the whole DipSet “movement” never went anywhere and just disbanded…

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      i’m glad the pink parade is over too.

      • DETROIT

        how are you from harlem and don’t like the dips? are you really a hater? i thought you were just acting. who did ya’ll have before them…doug e, nice and smooth, and mcgruff? how do you not support niggas that rep your hood?

        you’re still da man at this bloggin shit, but i just don’t understand the dip hate. them niggas repped hard wherever they went, wit like 50 harlem niggas!

        RIP BIG L

  • Queens Boy

    Alls I’m sayin is if some dude with a Chelsea Football Club jersey and blurred face pops up on EweToube with the “A” chain I’ll just die. lmao me too my nigga nother great psot Ron you can tell that juelz got robbed cause, listen to his opening statement

    “Bottom line, my former manager along, with an ex-group member, accepted an astronomical amount of money for a paid date that never happened or was ever brought to my knowledge. I was NOT robbed… My staff and I were kicked out of our orginal hotel for the commotion. The promoter, myself, and my Dipset associate Blackadon worked out the outstanding issue like bosses do.” -Juelz Santana, [all the fuck over] XXLMag.com [already]

    …come on juelz you faggot! thanks again for the insight Ron!

    btw the way you flipped that gamgstalicious shit was hilarious!!

  • Queens Boy

    opps! i meant post

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      i got you.

      yeah, man. everything about that response suggests he got took for his shit. and come on… yeen’t ask for no police?

  • http://www.myspace.com/youngmyke Myke_Wayne

    Killa layin low. Knockin these niggas off one by one.

  • Chad Biggz

    Dips love police protection just ask The GOV.

  • giantstepp

    Save that Boss shit Juelz! Nobody in there right mind is gonna settle a debt that has nothing to do with them and they know nothing about it! …say my cousin/homies or whoever gets fronted some product. They associate my name with the product…I know absolutely nothing about it, didnt approve it but yet im gonna pay for it?? NEGRO PLEASE! That dude got extorted or robbed, period!

  • Lowedwn

    “If he hasn’t sold the rights to those oh-so-gulliver SAS chaps, they might have taken some time out from their busy crumpet-eating, polo-shopping schedules to handle some blinky work.”

    …man I was thinking the same shit when I heard he got knocked in london of all places. I said the S.A.S niggaz must not have like being an American tax-write off and them niggaz is tryna re-coup.

  • DETROIT

    I don’t know mexico! on that video he has the same jewelry that he had when he was flossin on tru life. THE EXACT SAME SHIT! so he may not have gotten robbed. if he did, don’t you think the niggas that got him woulda spoke up by now?

  • http://www.xxlmag.com Benicio Del Thoro

    What kind of points does this get you if you have Juelz Santana in your cRap Music Fantasy League?

    I knew I should have held out for Fox Brown.

    Yo bust this…This whole post is the reason why rappers get dissed. Just think about it, and this is just an example. 50 for instance, when we read about shit like this on the net, that’s when Fif went in on his opponents. You have to hit your targets when they are strong, but you definitely hit them when they are weak. All I know if I had a problem with Juelz, I’d put somethin out and fast. You gotta capitalize.

  • Bobo D

    Ron, what happened with the Negro Please
    Tournament? Or are trying to pair it up with the Paralympics (no disrespect).

  • iLL

    What I dont get is; he posted one of them Jordan Towers vlogs and he’s posted up with his chains. Why would he go out the way to make this 13 minute video explaining why he didnt get robbed (driveling on and on about it) Homey shouldnt feel like he have something to prove or is that a sign of (yea my shit got took, i paid the ransom and i got it back but yall dont have to know bout it since im back at home court). Things that make you say hmmm.

  • Yaw

    I love all the English references in this! The Anelka pic was (insert any word of your choice which means gud without it sounding corny lol).

    Yo Ron, u pretty educated, or at least resourceful, when it comes to this lol

    • Pierzy

      “He speaks so well…”

  • kelito-vision

    stop hating ron….u called Obama’s speech last week Ether 2008…i call Palin’s speech last night Hit Em Up 2008…she smashed on Obama hard body…

  • http://www.theunderwriters.blogspot.com THE UNDERWRITER

    This just goes to show you that nobody is ungaffleable, no matter how many people they’ve killed on wax.

    It’s so cold in the L.

  • geico lizard

    that gangstalicious stuff is classic like your jeezy workout. anything palin said that was a clever went out the window when she said God wants the troops in iraq, that is always the republicans fall back plan when they have no facts they say God told them to do something.

  • geico lizard

    ron have you also noticed the republicans and some pastors hinting that obama fits the profile of the anti-christ? damn i can understand not wanting the man to win but calling him that is going hard as hell but we knew this would get ugly the closer it got to election day.

  • Shawty J

    As Bol pointed out, Santana wasn’t robbed, he was extorted, which is worse. At least when you get robbed you can say “Them niggas had guns” or “These niggas got the drop on me”. This was organized and set up and made him looks like an idiot in the end. I would’ve preferred for people to think I got robbed.

  • master cheef

    nice drop.

    it’s almost like dipset never even existed.

  • Hawaiian

    man i died when you put that Nicolas Anelka pic up!

  • Aem

    LOL! Chelsea….

  • alderman j

    I know its like a year later, but i know yall seen the you tube video 4 days after this post, with santana showing he still has all his jewelry, putting each chain on then getting the charm out the suitcase and putting it on, then taking the charm off the chain, taking the chain off, then putting on another chain, then getting another charm out of the suitcase and putting it on, and so on, and so on, repeating same action like 10-15 times. I dont think he was robbed, the ‘A’ charm was there!!! Stop hating clowns be clear.