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NEGRO PLEASE: The Game Prepares for Ritual Suicide

[Editor's Note: "Blogger's Note" has been taken over by Ron Mexico until further notice.]

“I think that Jay-Z is iconic, man and he Jay-Z. I bang his albums. He can use that against me if he likes and say that I’m a fan of him and diss me and say whatever he wants, but the bottom line is that I’m too disrespectful for Jay-Z. I go too hard. His beef is mediocre beef. It’s more swag. It’s less hardcore. Me? I go in on your grandma and your kids and your girl. It will get ugly and I don’t mind. And I got a whole coast to back me. My coast will turn their backs on whoever I’m beefing with. So basically just let me commit suicide because I’m the only cat that’ll commit suicide and then resurrects every time. For Jay to say that about me, that’s cool, man. That’s Jay-Z… If you fuck with me I’ll turn into a beast and I’ll will rip your head off. I’ll bust your lips and turn the Roc-A-Fella sign into a pee stain… West-West. And I know this interview is gonna find its way on the internet somehow… Let’s tie the shoes on this one and let it walk… If you got something to promote use me as your tool and get broke down limb by limb by bloody limb. That’s just it, man. It’s no games… I’m the rapper that could be a fan of Jay and still rip him limb from limb and be a fan… I’ll kiss Jay goodbye with his own lips. I’m gonna make Jay so mad that he’s gonna have to say something… I killed a whole group limb by limb, man. See what happened to G-Unit? I stretched them out. Three years, man. I interrogated them, pulled their fingernails out with pliers, taped their tongue to their lips and just fed them vinegar and gas all the way until there was no more G-Unit… You ever hit a roc[k] with a hammer?” –The Game, Chino’s 104.7 Radio Show

I know Jayceon thinks he’s hella cool right now. He just saw The Dark Knight and is doing his damnedest to sound like Christian Bale’s Batman.

What special kind of dickrider can’t even get his fighting face together? Does he want to fight Jay-Z or give him a massage complete with happy ending?

It sounds from here that Jayceon love Jigga long time–far too long to throw a straight right hand.

He may as well have said:

“I can rip Jay-Z’s dick off, beat him with it, reattach it to his pelvic region and finish the blowjob! That’s no thang!”

Maybe Hurricane Game thinks his straight right hand has more of a tsunami effect. Outlandish claims like “I got a whole coast to back me. My coast will turn their backs on whoever I’m beefing with” lead me to believe that this dude thinks he can drop California, Oregon and Washington into the sea with the rumble of yet another 40% quote, 60% shoutout verse.

Someone from the left coast please set me straight if I’ve got this fucked up. Last time I checked, Game is NOT the emperor of the west side, nor is he Namor. He’s not even the Black Fonzarelli whereas he can just snap his fingers twice and every west coast citizen will stand facing out toward the Pacific Ocean.

That’s E-40’s gig.

As far as slapping a camel in the lips goes, Game’s among those whose threats I honor least. I’m more worried about Ne-Yo accidentally punching someone while flailing his arms in a massive bitch fit than I am about The Game doing anything beside puckering or sobbing.

If Game keeps stroking he’s gonna get that mouthful of salty camel load and it’s likely to be a lot more than he bargained for. Sure, jerking a camel always seems like a good idea mid-mirage. It’s not until the delirium wears off that one realizes he didn’t actually pop open a fire hydrant in the projects.

With Chuck Taylor having already revolved from vehement Jay-Z detraction to camel gargling and back full-circle to the hate, I, like most rap fans, have no idea what to expect from this man at album release time. Blood-erfly over here is fully media savvy and knows whatever shit he pops on some radio chickenhead’s program will end up on the popular blogs.

What never appears to be well thought-out is his course of attack. First, the tidbit Chino tosses Game comes from some unconfirmed gossip blog fodder of the highest order. I wouldn’t be surprised if Game started the Wimbledon rumor himself.

Second, for the children at home who may not be aware, running around with DMX, Jim Jones and other top-seeded SDNs outcasts of the rap industry is far from a good look. I hope these aren’t the soldiers he’s assembling for Charlie Taylor’s War. I don’t think Doja, X, and the Dipshits would come out of this one alive.

This ain’t Tropic Thunder. There ain’t enough Booty Sweat or Bust-A-Nut bars to keep them going in the jungle! Game’s playing the dude disguised as a rapper dude disguised as a stripper disguised as a gangster dude.

He’s gone full-retard. You don’t go full-retard and expect an award.

What’ll it be? Is Game Nation going to war with Roc Nation? Is Georgia going to invade Russia? Or should we all wait patiently for Gangsta Rap’s favorite housecat to cough up more Reasonable Doubt verses on our new carpet?

That must be it. Game’s likely tired of coughing up all bullshit and is ready to die any time. If such is the case, I do hope that Jay-Z and Beyonce’s condo is the Doja Airplane Bomb’s final flight from L.A.X.‘s kamikaze target.

Negro… please do it!

I’d be talking retirement too if shit-talking like Wendy Williams fresh out of the Dominican salon on payday were my only recourse for promotion.

I’m not usually a [Doctor’s] advocate of the expression “kill yourself,” but dammit if the shit doesn’t actually apply here for once.

Questions? Comments? Requests? Why so serious?

P.S.: The Game didn’t end G-Unit. He just got kicked out bailed at the right time. Those niggas didn’t need any help falling off.

P.P.S.: Doja finds the time to get after Jay-Z’s Diamond Dallas Page sign having been taken from wrestling when his own stage name is clearly inspired by Triple H.

Shake my head.

Let me high-step away from niggas who stay losing for a moment and extend big respect to Jamaican sprinters.

A blooooooodclaaaaaaaat zinc dat! Yuh nah winna GOLD!

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