Viva the straight rap movement

Natural born pessimist that I am, I figured that hipster rap might be the final nail in the coffin. Hip-Hop had already been on a creative downswing for more than 10 years now. Certainly, the fact that mofos are walking around wearing purses and tight-ass pants showing off their nuts was a sign that hip-hop had crossed some sort of threshold into complete and utter teh gheyness.

It had gotten to the point where, when I’m talking to someone who’s never heard of XXL, which is the case more often than you’d think, even amongst people who listen to rap music, I just tell them it’s a magazine about fat men’s clothes. Which would make sense anyway, since I wear fat men’s clothes, and presumably I might have some sort of expertise in the field.

Lately though, there’s been some signs that hip-hop might actually be about to reclaim its manliness.

First of all, there’s was the backlash against hipster rap in the hip-hop blogosphere, which I think was brought on by a few different things, including Arab rapper Mazzi’s jihad (pardon my use of the term) against hipster rappers like Jay Electronica and the Cool Kids, Unkut.com’s poll to determine the biggest douchebag in hipster rap, and the fact that the Cool Kids put an album out and it only sold like 4,000 copies, despite the fact that they’ve been mentioned on the Internets more times than 2 girls 1 cup.

Now, I see there’s been a movement developing in the streets against onstensibly straight hip-hop kids walking around dressed as if they were fruits.

The other day, there was a story in the Village Voice about some guys out in New York called Thug Slaughter Force who’ve got a song out called “No Tight Clothes.” There’s also a music video on YouTube, and a t-shirt that says “Tight Clothes” with a red slash through it.

Here’s a few sample lyrics from “No Tight Clothes,” as printed in the Village Voice:

Take them tight-ass fuckin’ clothes off

That shit ain’t gangsta, nigga

We don’t wear tight clothes . . . we let it hang!

. . . Shirt extra-small and you six feet tall

Lookin’ like you got your pants off a Ken doll

Of course, with it being the gay-ass Village Voice, these guys are painted as virulent homophobes and failed no-talents trying to capitalize off a gimmick. I can buy the argument TSF put forth in the article, that they aren’t homophobes so much as they are committed fans of hip-hop, concerned with creeping teh gheyness in what was once a bastion of manliness in the black community.

But it’s kinda hard to argue against that second point. According to the story in the Voice, these guys have been kicking around the hip-hop scene for 10 years now, and it’s not hard to see why, as awful as “No Tight Clothes” is. It sounds like it could be a D4L record. Which would seem counterintuitive, given that these guys are from New York.

Or does the song suck balls on purpose, as a sort of commentary on the quality of rap music production these days? Like a modern day version of that song on the second Jeru the Damaja album where he’s rapping about his bling bling.  Probably not, right?

Far superior, both in terms of the song itself and its attendant YouTube video, is “Operation Purse Snatcher” by a guy named Japcity.

I first became aware of this kid the other day, when he put out another YouTube video, called “Put that N-bomb under the Jail,” about R. Kelly. Even though I couldn’t necessarily agree with the sentiment, I was taken aback by the the sheer force of the argument as put forth in both the song and the video. Japcity fucking ethered R. Kelly.

And come to find out, R. Kelly isn’t the only one Japcity fucking ethered. Yesterday, I did some subsequent digging into this kid’s YouTube account (nhjic), and I turned up his video for “Operation Purse Snatcher,” in which he absolutely destroys Lil Wayne, and mad other people in hip-hop who’ve been engaging in various forms of fruitiness.

It’s absolutely brutal. I’d describe it, but it’s probably best you just watch it.

I’m surprised I’m just now finding out about it, given the amount of time I spend discussing hip-hop on the Internets, and given how absolutely fucking huge Lil’ Wayne has gotten in these past few weeks. Could it be that there’s some conspiracy amongst mainstream media outlets to purposely obscure material that’s critical of hip-hop’s golden boys? I certainly hope not. Lord knows this is the kind of thing hip-hop could use right about now.

  • ri067953

    Yo, XXL mag as a catalog for fat men’s clothing is funny as shit. We all know that a rocawear shirt isn’t hot unless it is a XXLT. Fuck homo rappers wearing that those tight pants. What happened to wearing hoodies and carharts. That’s hip-hip!

  • B

    Hey ri067953, I love hip-hip too! But anyways, Japcity got a better song called “Take That Nigga’s Chain.” Youtube that shit.

  • master cheef

    co-sign all that shit. i’m tired of all these gay motherfuckers. I might would play some of these fools’ records if they didnt act like such queers.

    i like fucking bitches and like to hear about it in my rap music. shit gets my drenalin going to lay it down on a bitch.

    should i say no homo in case people accuse me of being a homo because i said i like fucking bitches and that could possibly be taken as frontin because i’m on the keyboard?

  • Chris

    Maybe it has more to do with niggas being too dumb and socially/intellectually conservative to make decent music?

    Maybe concerning yourself with other people’s lives and manner of dress is for lames?

  • http://www.plasticsquirtguns.blogspot.com thoreauly77

    um, those japcity videos are retarded. but, so is r. kelly and skinny jeans, so maybe the whole thing evens out? ultimately though, who really cares how another man dresses?

  • http://myspace.com/marko4aoc Marko-V

    Music goes in cycles and we just happen to be in an ultra nouveau rich stage where the music we express shows off how we dress.I liken it to glam rock back in the day with all the hair metal bands until Nirvana came with some personal depressin ish and totally made the music obsolete. Think about the times tho. Whatever rapper can come with some heartfelt music about their personal trials and tribulations without an uptempo beat, will win and totally redirect the flow of current rap music. It all goes in cycles. DMX got rid of the shiny suits.

    get @ me: myspace.com/marko4aoc

  • $ykotic

    I thought being gay was when u became interested in a man, being concerned at how he looks, the way he dresses, how he smells?

    Usually on lockdown, the hardest, most brolic dude is the greatest booty bandit of all.

  • giantstepp

    No tight clothes = Fcuk Compton (Tim Dogg)…just another Gimmick!

  • FaMe

    Real talk Bol. this is another real post from you. I fuck wit it. But think about it. this whole trend started with Dipset. well really it started wit them one hit wonder niggas that wanted to party like rockstars. at the same time dipset was at the top of their game. Jim just did the Ballin thing and Santana was smashin 16 year old girls. either way, they took that rockstar shit and brought it to the hood. circa the same time, a pre-Carter II Weezyana was Dipset’s faggot weed carrier. and we all know what happened once the Carter dropped, so there you go. now we’re here today. the shit just never ended though. fuckin radiculous

    BeatsAndFoodStamps.blogspot.com

  • 239allday

    Yo Bol, I seldom agree with you nigga but I can make an exception today. I hate hipster rap almost as much as I hate those gay ass tight pants. I didn’t think it could get worse than the pink shirt craze of 02′/03′ year, but I spoke too soon.

    Let ya nuts breathe nigga!!!

  • Avenger XL

    This is all bullshit. Marko-V got it right music goes in cycles. Most of these douche bag complaining about so-called hipster hop are just as bad as the old men complaining about rap in the beginning on some “that shit ain’t real music they just talking”. Or the media painting everything with a curse word on it as so-called Gangsta rap.

    First of all please keep in mind labels are just the way compaines control your buying habits and thus allowing you to consume a lifestyle. i.e. if you are suburban you can be gangsta(pretend to be anyway). If you are black you can dress like something other than a fucking convict (What is more gay than sagging pants so your boy can tap yo ass)NO BOL

    But why in the name of Hiphop is it Teh Ghey to wear ugly tight clothes I just find it wack myself but guess how I respond I don’t buy them and guess what else I don’t listen to their music unless I like them. Hear is a news flash for all you fag hunters out there. Most of these dudes who act hyper straight are taking it up the coat on the low. If you straight you straight no need to wear certain clothes or talk a certain way to prove it. Fools who do either are over compensating and I wonder why hmmmm could it be they are GAY.

    And why does every hip-hopper have to dress the same or all hip-hop has to sound the same. That kind of shit creates posers and douche bags who complain hip-hop is dead every day. Also I don’t like the idea that black dudes gotta rock ghetto ass shit to be excepted. If I murk you while rocking gear like urkle are you still not Murked at the end of the day? Come on dude this whole idea is suspect closet HOMO talk to me NO BOL on this whole post.

  • http://www.theunderwriters.blogspot.com THE UNDERWRITER

    I cannot fuck with this hipster rap shit. The whole movement killed itself when it let rap journalists get away with naming them such a sugary-ass collective name.

    I feel bad for The Cool Kids and K.I.T.H., but come on now – “Hipster?” It sounds like the name of a generic iPod for gay fashion magazine editors. Only comes in fuschia.

    You already nolo.

  • CHUN

    He does reference your ‘no homo’ campaign in his song…..

  • geico lizard

    Bol you have me almost in tears laughing because there is a commercial that comes on late at night called XXL and they have fat guys in plaid and overalls its really bad that they make big men think that stuff looks nice. also there is a place near the mall called casual male XL so i guess they want the big men to feel bad about being that size even when they are shopping.

  • dizzle

    There was a similar push back against Vanilla Ice and MC Hammer back in the day. Gayness apparently comes in pant cycles. Disco; bell bottoms, New Wave; tight jeans, Hammer; Parachute Pants, and Now; tight jeans + bapes + purses.

  • MI

    has no one noticed that 50 Cent is the gayest looking rapper of all time? . . . seriously. and i like 50 Cent but his constant way overly masculine shirtless appearance, surrounded by other lesser men (Banks and Yayo), holding onto phallic symbols in photos, is just a fact. that glittery Curtis shirt he wore on the cover of XXL really put it over the top.

  • Avenger xl

    I just listened to that Japcity video. The best part was the Wayne impersonation at the begining. Japcity sounds like a average to below average east coast cat with moderate skills who is salty because nobody feel his stale flow. The THug slaughter house force need to quit they are just wack dude you are not from the south and rhyming over a generic track that sound like some D bag on soundclick made it to blow up jocking one of FloRhidas corny ass producers. Bottomline both of these examples are garbage truck juice.

    Try this you idiots if you don’t like it don’t support it and if you like the D bags Bol mentioned support them. But dissing diversity of any kind in a black culture as Gay is still stupid. You homophobes are secretly Gay like the so many priests in the church. Ya’ll fools are lame as Jap city and TSF.

    P.S. Stop yo wack homeboys from doing youtube videos it ain’t cool just go back to fast food or whatever you low rent fucks do for money damn!

  • ARICE

    NO..DID ANY ONE EVER NOTICE HOW GAY 2 PAC USED TO LOOK…AND DON’T SAY NIGGAS DRESSED LIKE THAT N THE 90′S CAUSE NOT ALL NIGGA’S DRESSED LIKE THAT! OH YEAH CAM’RON WAS THE ONLY REAL NIGGA N THE DIPLOMATS THAT DID NOT DRESS LIKE THE BIKER OUT OF THE VILLAGE PEOPLE…THAT NIGGA WAS STRAIGHT CHAMPION HOODY’S JEANS AN NIKE BOOTS.

    • maximus 32

      I don’t agree with Arice on Cam’Ron. That dude went on 106 and park with pink mink on his sneakers. He was wearing a whole bunch of pink shit talking about he comfortable with himself. If he was that comfortable and straight he wouldn’t pick pink everyday for two years to wear. A pink Range Rover with pink interior…what the fuck is that? No grown straight man, entertainer or not thinks to do that shit. 2PAC did look real gay on the All Eyez on Me cover. God rest his soul but I always thought that. He was my favorite MC of all time but he was wearing some gay leather shit on one of the best CDs of all time. I guess the quality of that album was so high that you kinda forgot about the cover.

      Bol – you still a sucker for that shit you wrote the other day about Killer Mike being on some terrorist shit. Either you are an Uncle Tom – white nut scratcher, a white boy from the heartland of America who actually believes in the War on Terror or just an asshole saying shit just to fuck with people. Either way it does seem by the shit you write that you and some of these other motherfuckers need to get some pussy. If you can’t get none, buy some. Just unplug for a little while and get up some courage to talk to some chicks. There are some average chicks out here who might be stupid enough to give you some pussy. Gay dudes get pussy so there is hope for you.

  • Phil

    I’m just gonna say that that professional bitch Mazzi only increased Jay Electronica’s fanbase. And, I couldn’t put jay elect in the same realm as the Cool Kids, sorry, he’s something else entirely. He don’t wear the tight jeans either, lol. And, personally, I could give less than a fuck what ANOTHER MAN is wearing, dudes. That’s what WOMEN do. As if what they wearing is gonna just magically rub off onto me. And to judge ANYONE’s talent based on a garment is small-minded, ignorant, and counterproductive to Hip-Hop’s survival. You should be more concerned with white mags comparing Lil Wayne to Bob Dylan!

  • grp03

    hipster rap, just like gangsta rap, has its good shit and bad shit. for example, id rather listen to kanye any day over most rappers, as much as i think hes a deuche bag who constantly bitches about stuff. however, since when was lil wayne considered hipster? isn’t he just more like a bisexual gangsta? whatever wayne is, he deserves his own category for crossing boundaries other hipsters have failed to reach.

  • brooklynjuell

    This article is one of the most homophobic diatribes I’ve seen in a while. If you’re a real journalist, you would do well to criticize the music and the cultural currency…instead of resorting to schoolyard taunts of people being
    “gay.” Real classy.

    We in the hip-hop community– and as young people, and black people– need to stand up against this sort of thing. We should have media outlets and safe spaces for EVERYONE. If you don’t like the Cool Kids, fine. But What does that have to do with sexual orientation or manhood? If you ask me, it takes a real man (or woman!) to be who they truly are instead of conforming to some bullshit standard that society places on them. Grow up!

  • http://www.fuckbyron.org fuckbyron

    byron crawford is a fat homophobic bitch

  • Omar

    Fuck this article and fuck all the comments. You straight muthafuckas need to stop blaming gay people from ruining hip hop when it’s the god-damned RIAA and all the fake-ass straight rappers contributing to hip hop’s demise! And what the fuck does it matter if a rapper is gay? I thought it was about talent. But these homophobic-ass Japcitys and other fake-ass punks have no talent, and therefore no right to even comment on the current state of hip hop. You think all “faggots” are pussies? You think we’re all soft? Say that to the barrel of my fucking gun as I shove it down your hateful fucking throats!!! You want war? You got it punks! LGBT representin in this fake-ass bitch!