Hiring women to beat women

Putting your shoe on a woman is generally frowned upon, but what if you hire another woman to do your dirty work for you? I suppose it would still be wrong, in a sense, but would it still be considered misogynistic? What if the broad really had it coming?

By now I’m sure you d-bags have all heard about this weekend’s incident with Foxy Brown. Supposedly, she broke up with some guy she was dating, and to get back at her, the guy went and got three nappy headed hoes to go after Foxy. They beat the crap out of her and stole her Louis bag with $500 and her hearing aid in it.

There’s no word yet on whether or not she’s been able to retrieve the hearing aid, but I bet the guy is especially distraught now that Foxy is deaf again. I don’t know about the rest of you ‘bags, but I always thought it would be cool to bang a deaf broad, just to see what kind of sounds she would make.

(In fact, if you’re a deaf girl reading this, and you’re… you know, at least decent-looking, maybe the two of us could hook up in the name of science. Trust that it wouldn’t be a thing where I’d do it just so I could write about it on this site the next day. Fuck the kids who read this site; I just wanna know for myself.)

Granted I realize Foxy is the victim in all of this (as if it wasn’t already bad enough that she can’t hear shit), but the more I hear about this incident, the more I can’t help but be disappointed in Foxy Brown.

First of all, I’m not saying she definitely should’ve been able to take out three gully project bitches all by herself (though I’m sure I could take like 40 of them – bring it on, ladies), but it sounds like she pretty much just stood there and got her ass beat. Which is disheartening to say the least. I mean, it’s one thing to flex on some defenseless 60 year-old Asian manicurist, but now you have to wonder just how hardbody Foxy Brown is, to use the parlance of our times.

Also depressing: Supposedly, not only did Foxy Brown run to the cops and moan to them – in that weird shriek that deaf people tend to have – that she’d just had her ass beaten and robbed, but then she actually rode around with them in a cop car through the projects looking for the assailants. No, really. As a 26 year-old man who spends his afternoons sitting around in his underwear giggling at Clueless, I can’t think of anything less hip-hop.

If anything, Foxy Brown ought to be glad at this point that she’s a female rapper. Because I can’t imagine Fat Joe or somebody getting away with anything like that. Shit, not even Cam’ron, for that matter.

As far as whether or not hiring another woman to beat another woman’s ass is considered Kosher, I’m not sure. I mean, it’s not like there’s much in the way of standards in the hip-hop community anyway. Back in the day, Dr. Dre did everything to Dee Barnes short of taking her up on the roof and dropping her ass off, and it’s not like his career has suffered much. Today, a rapper like Saigon not only roid rages on his girlfriend, but then he goes and writes songs about it. And I haven’t heard as much as a peep about that. (Though obviously part of it has to do with the fact that the female “hip-hop heads” who live to destroy hip-hop don’t actually listen to much hip-hop.)

So if anything, this weekend’s incident with Foxy Brown could actually be viewed as progress. Which is not to say that the shit was right or… you know, justifiable in a court of law, but it was at least more right than something that’s completely indefensible. (It’s like the last Nas album compared to the last Jay-Z album!) A man shouldn’t beat up a woman, because, more often than not, it’s just plain not gonna be a fair fight, but there’s still plenty of instances where a woman could use a nice meeting with a shoe. In that case, outsourcing your woman-beating work to an actual woman would at least seem like a decent compromise, if not quite the best in conflict resolution tactics.

  • B.N.W

    LOL!! BOL THIS IS CLASSIC!! i agree some broads leave u no other option but to get in that azz. but a pimp with 3 hoes ready to ride or die!! lol. Foxy aint gangsta & needs to give the “HOOD” act up. Who wants to bet in 10yrs the broad from i love New York is the new foxy brown?

  • i’ll shit bag u

    bol u scared 2 smile,they called u ugly?hahaa u fuckin ugly mutha fucka!!!

  • http://xxlmag.com houston’s finest

    hoes beating on hoes is cool in my book. maybe next they should jump 50′s baby momma.

  • http://www.xxlmag.com/?p=11020 Jay

    but I always thought it would be cool to bang a deaf broad, just to see what kind of sounds she would make.

    (In fact, if you’re a deaf girl reading this, and you’re… you know, at least decent-looking, maybe the two of us could hook up in the name of science. Trust that it wouldn’t be a thing where I’d do it just so I could write about it on this site the next day. Fuck the kids who read this site; I just wanna know for myself
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

    LMFAO…that shit is funny as fuck..
    now u got me intrested in fuckin a deaf girl
    that was the highlight of my day… thank Bol

  • jacquez
  • http://xxlmag.com Billy X. Sunday

    Paris Hilton hardbody status still > Foxy Brown

  • these posts are racist

    Paris Hilton hardbody status still > Foxy Brown hardbody status much > Billy X Sunday.

    Billy, you’re a certified…bootleg, fake intellectual.

  • Content

    Bol,

    That shit was beautiful. Keep it up.

  • http://www.myglobaloutlet.com Severe

    i banged a deaf chick once.
    i would tell u to try it bol, but even a deaf chick wouldnt do you. u might have better luck wit a blind chick….but i doubt it.

  • http://blogs.hiphopdx.com/meka Meka Soul

    >…I always thought it would be cool to bang a deaf broad, just to see what kind of sounds she would make.>

    i quit.

  • stoneyisland

    Real men dont ever raise a hand to a woman, even a stanking ass skeezer…However a REAL man does have the option of paying another chick to beat a chicks ass:) I am all for it. Every dude should have a gangsta chick on his payroll for situations where some chick needs her weave tightened the fuck up:) Chick at work giving you problems? call your gangsta chick, a chick keeps calling you after you break up? call your gangsta chick. I may start a business after this post, if you have a owman in your life, be it spouse, girl friend, mistress, whoever, and they giving you a hard time for the low price of 150 i will have a gangsta chick readjust her attitude over night:) call me at 1-800-beat-her-ass, lines are open now:)

  • DAAAAYYYUUUUM!!!!

    As a black male (70s baby) can we stop the slaughter on sisters. Charles Manson is in jail for a reason, eventhough he never murked anyone he ordered it. SOS Save our Selves from FAT ASSES like BOL who hate hip hop and black women!!!

  • bucnasty aka young buc

    what an idea, wish i had thought of this shit myself. pure brilliance. women everywhere, beware. this is some shit that can change relationships everywhere for the better…

  • yaboy

    LMAO.

    foxy brown should run out onto the street and introduce herself to the front end of a car.

    *das a cadillac (in scarface voice)*

  • whatupkicko

    The degenerates hero.

  • Cuban link

    (in Jigga voice) Bol you crazy for this one!

    that blind girl shit is prolly the funniest thing any blogger has ever come up with

    Muchas Gracias

  • Cuban link

    Shit, not even Cam’ron, for that matter.

    ^Cmon Bol, Killa Cam couldve gotten away with that one, no problem

  • Mr whipple

    Bol has gained a lot of weight, look him up on youtube

  • these posts are racist

    BOL Saturday Night Haters.

  • Larry Brite

    Stat Quo said -”i’m the shi% and the only 1 ain’t herd is Foxy” – (i don’t care who you are – That’s FUNNY rite therrr’)

  • Horus

    1) Liked the shameless plug for deaf girl sex.
    2) The fight challenge you just issued may end up with you in an Andy Kaufmann like situation.
    3) The image of you in your underwear was unnecessary.

  • john cochran

    LIKE GHOST SAID, “MY GIRL COUSINS GONE ROCK YOU”. THIS POST JUST SHOWS THAT BOL STAYS IN THE HOUSE ALOT, CAUSE ALL MY NIGGAS IN THE HOOD BEEN GETTIN GANGSTA BITCHES TO DO THEY LIGHT WORK.

  • jimmy

    certified platinum.

  • Tyler

    U are funny dude BoL, Beast of the Bloggers. And deaf girl sex is great but not as great as a chick in a in wheel chair if U know what I mean dawg.
    UrbanRock
    http://www.myspace.com/marcusorealiusmusic
    http://www.myspace.com/marcmaysrockandrollthug

  • http://www.plasticsquirtguns.blogspot.com thoreauly77

    what the hell DO you mean, tyler? weird. this post makes my brain hurt. i don’t even know where to begin except to say that you and i couldn’t be any different in our perception and treatment of women. this kind of shit isn’t even funny.

  • http://www.myspace.com/writeonpointmagazine janice

    “I don’t know about the rest of you ‘bags, but I always thought it would be cool to bang a deaf broad, just to see what kind of sounds she would make.”

    LOL Soooooo wrong……

  • Tyler

    thoreauly77 Says:

    June 25th, 2007 at 5:01 pm
    what the hell DO you mean, tyler? weird.

    Do your homework^^^^^^^^^^^^^Peep this movie called “Crash” homeboy & not the one about blacks & white & shit wit’ Luda up in it either. Then holla at a playa’
    UrbanRock
    http://www.myspace.com/marcusorealiusmusic
    ww.myspace.com/marcmaysrockandrollthug

  • these posts are racist

    Irony. Billy and BOL constantly criticize those they consider to be un hip hop or killing the culture. Blogs like this…that just make fun of those less fortunate, etc. are the antithisis of Hip Hop.

  • http://www.plasticsquirtguns.blogspot.com thoreauly77

    tyler, i have seen that movie — it’s pretty gnarly. good luck with that.

  • Latino Thug

    this one was nasty.

  • http://www.myspace.com/killuminatti1_23 KilluminattI7

    “outsourcing your woman-beating work to an actual woman would at least seem like a decent compromise, if not quite the best in conflict resolution tactics.”

    by-Ron,
    I alwayz considered you to be little less than a fake-a** re-tread un-original/copycat/ geneirc version of Paul Mooney, STAR– do remember he pretty much patented style of “pseudo-journalism” YEARS ago w/ his Reality Check column in the back of the source– and countless others…
    But that being said, even I (normally your staunchest critic) gotta admit that that ish right there was type funny!!

    In any event by-RON you should go ckilla cam ya self. still

  • amedawg00

    This was one gully as post Bol. This is the type of material the prudes will criticize you for, and yet secretly nod in agreement. Bol (Howard Stern) Crawford, you have officially reached shock blogger status, as if you hadnt already…hahah..big ups…

  • J.A.M.E.S.

    Back in the day, Dr. Dre did everything to Dee Barnes short of taking her up on the roof and dropping her ass off

    ^The funniest thing about that line is its not even an exaggeration!

    “He picked her up and “began slamming her face and the right side of her body repeatedly against a wall near the stairway” as his bodyguard held off the crowd. After Dre tried to throw her down the stairs and failed, he began kicking her in the ribs and hands. She escaped and ran into the women’s rest room. Dre followed her and “grabbed her from behind by the hair and proceeded to punch her in the back of the head.”

  • BlackGenius

    That is the most hilarious shit I have read alll day keep up the good work man.

  • DaKidCapri

    this is raw. as a female i feel you one hundred percent well maybe its just because im dykin but the point is that when i get older im going to be just like you…my dream is to write in xxl just like you and i will one day…your mah inspiration on the real

  • kal

    haha yo that shit was funny BOL.. i dont kno shit bout foxy brown cuz i never liked her bitch ass in the first place but now i kno she a fake bitch.. so now i rly dont like her

  • abdulnasir imam

    nigga this is classic

  • 1,2..1,2 it don’t stop81

    YOU OFF DA’ DAMN SCALE WIT’ DIS ONE! PURE POWDER OFF TONY DESK KNA’MEAN!

    BUT NAW IT AIN’T FOR NIGGAS TO BE GETTIN ALL BRAWLIC ON A BROD (IT’S JUS SO UNCIVILIZED), NOW WHAT YOU DO IS GET YA’ TIRED ASS RAMEN-NODDLE EATIN JACKI WEAVE UNK BOUNCIN’ IN A CAR YOU PAYIN FOR OUTTA YO’ LIL’CEASAR’S PIZZA CHECK BABY MAMA TO STOMP A MUD HOLE IN THAT ASS SO DEEP THAT CHARMIN WOULD HAVE TO INVENT A BODY ROLL OF TISSUE TO WIPE THAT ASS UP! I MEAN SHIT BESIDES SUCKIN DOWN THE FUTURE CRIMINALS OF THE WORLD WHICH WOULD BE MY OFFSPRING WHAT OTHER USES DOES A BM HAVE?

  • 1,2..1,2 it don’t stop81

    ^^^^
    proceds to bang Bizzare’s “I’m in love wit’ you”

  • THOROUGHBRED!

    I have to say when I first heard this story I was thinking “How the hell this happened” now that I have details, its believable. Growning up in NYC one way I made money was by knocking broads out for a fee $50 bucks/K.O.! But see that’s only for chicks that really got hand skills and still come out on top after getting “jumped”.
    (Ha! Ive been jumped more than I can remember!) Thats how I met my best friend of 12 years! So when you think you’re the baddest bitch… better watch out for that THOROUGHBRED BITCH!

  • http://xxlmag.com michelle

    YOU WRITE THE DUMBEST SHIT! IT WAS FUNNY THOUGH. GET OUT THE HOUSE MORE AND STOP JERKING OFF.

  • http://myspace.com/dantaiinc jolly stomper rep

    somewhere lil kim is smilin…

  • kandy

    reading this shit ..i knew that there are only men on this page…but Bol whoever the fuck you are u are one pussy mother fucker..u propably aint getting pussy anyways and want to fuck someone who propably cannot verbally tell you NO…so u resort to banging deAF girls. So get ur fucking hands out of ur pants and go fuck your MOMA cause i am sure her fucking ass is DEAF!!!

  • kandy

    fuck

  • bizzle

    Foxy needs to get her ass out the projects

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