#Kanye_Thumbnail

Kanye_Intro

10 Possible Features At Kanye West's Amusement Park

After the premiere of his Cannes Film Festival debut, <em>Cruel Summer</em> on Wednesday night in the south of France, Kanye West stated, "What I want to do post-Grammys is I want to work on cities, I want to work on amusement parks, I want to change entertainment experiences or life."<p>Coming from 'Ye, who now has accomplished a great deal—from fashion to films—it's not too surprising that he wants to take things to a different realm, even if that means amusement parks. With his artistic vision showing no boundaries, <em>XXL</em> was genuinely excited about Kanye's next goal, and conjured up some likely features that could pop up in Yeezy Land. —<em>XXL Staff</em> (<a href="http://twitter.com/#!/XXLSTAFF">@XXLStaff</a>)</p>

Kanye_1

Kanye West Rant-Reenactment Stand

Guests get a chance to get their deepest feelings off their chests at this stand, which consists of only a mic, a camera and a giant screen that broadcasts each rant throughout the theme park. Fans with rants that are deemed worthy by Kanye will receive special prizes like George Bush campaign pins or a replica of Taylor Swift’s VMA.

Kanye_2

Throw Some D's Milk Bottle Toss

In a twist on the classic carnival game, guests attempt to throw large D-shaped rings over the neck of glass milk bottles. Winners receive free breast implants on the spot. Though not as popular, Big Sean's "Shooting At Jiggling A$$es" stand next door, offers free butt implants to winners.

Kanye_3

Roc Pass

Guests willing to drop extra racks at the door can get a “Roc Pass”—an imitation of the classic Roc-a-Fella chain. This pass allows them to cut lines, eat for free, drink out of two Champagne-bottle-shaped mugs, and yell at anyone in the park that gets on their nerves. Basically, you’re allowed to act like Dame Dash (pre Roc-a-Fella breakup) for a day.

Kanye_4

Through the Wire

Ride at your own risk. This unpredictable coaster is known to breakdown because, like a young Kanye, the operator spends all of his off-time making beats instead of sleeping. Grab ya NoDoz!

Kanye_5

Jesus Walks

A large piece of glass covers a giant aquarium, allowing kids to literally “walk on water” and explore the wonders of marine life.

Kanye_6

Flashing Lights

This short-lived ride was shut down after the flurry of lights that it flashed at guests was said to cause seizures.

Kanye_7

All Falls Down

Guests get to experience the most dramatic fall of their lifetime, while former GOOD Music signees, Consequence, GLC, Really Doe, and members of Sa-Ra work both as conductors and safety instructors.

Kanye_8

Big Brother

In his latest effort to impress his big brother, 'Ye designs a tribute ride for Jay-Z, decked out in all-black everything. Hov never shows up for the much-hyped debut of the coaster, leading Ye to the point of mental breakdown as he rides it alone for a week straight, staring at the empty seat next to him with tears in his eyes.

Kanye_9

Beautiful Dark Twisted Nightmare

This extravagant roller coaster takes fans through an upscale haunted house. Hot zombie babes pop out to arouse, then frighten patrons as they ride by Basquiats that are painted in blood by Rick Ross.

Kanye_10

Drive Slow

Billed as the slowest rollercoaster ever made, guests can get custom grills made by Paul Wall himself while they wait in line.

Kanye_Bonus

(Bonus) Kim Kardashian Curvy Coaster

Inspired by the curves of his beautiful girlfriend Kim Kardashian, Kanye creates a coaster with such dramatic curves that put even fans who are strapped in risk of falling.