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Nickelus F: Thank You

Now, I’m not a big fan of Drake and after listening to his homeboy, Nickelus F’s Thank You mixtape, I’m even less of a fan of Drake and not a fan of Nickelus F at all. Really, what’s the deal? He is by far the most average rapper out there. He sounds like a non-interesting GLC (His voice sounds like GLC’s at times).

His style is plain as a cracker (the cookie, not a white person), his lyrics say nothing and contain no content and his flow is as common as Lonnie Rashid Lynn Jr. when it’s not just lazy on the track like a rapper who already went 8 times platinum. His rhymes are about average but they don’t make you think or even pay attention. There’s times it reeks of tired metaphors that scream “listen to me! I put no effort into this so I’m ill!” which really isn’t a good look.

For example, on “Heavy Wrist” he said, “I think I’m gonna change my name to Mr. Get It First/I got the girls going crazy like a missing purse/I’m like a bathroom break, they wanna lift their skirt/I’ll make a video out of her like I did with nerp…they say I’m great like Tony The Tiger/I’m something you’ve never seen like Napoleon’s Liger.” This dude makes me want to crown Yung Berg the dopest rapper in the game. That’s real talk. It gets to the point where you’re thinking “Is this going anywhere?”

His hooks are weaker thank Rick Ross in a KFC/Pizza Hut joint too, man. I mean they couldn’t bait me in for nothing. Even T-Pain’s Auto-Tune hook couldn’t help his cause on “Digital.”

The only bright spot I could find on the mixtape was “Doobey In The Ash Tray 2009.” And you can credit that little success to his homie, Devin The Dude. He actually made that song entertaining and listenable with the melodic hook and suave beat.

When it was finally over, I was left thinking “Why?” like Jadakiss. Why would someone give this man any studio time? So he can say, “Show my penis cleavage?” That sounds wrong on more levels than one. Or so maybe he can say, “They call me Cujo, they say I’m dog nice.” What the hell does that mean?! Are niqqas animal nice now? If he’s dog nice where does that leave DMX? Is Trina chicken nice? I suppose Jay-Z is camel nice. This dude is killing ma, dunn! He chose the right name I’ll tell you that. Most of the time I kept saying, “Nickelus, F*ck you talk’ about?” Man, I’ma leave it at this. I can go on all night and day picking this mixtape apart, but it’ll just keep getting uglier like Lil’ Kim after every surgery (She was so cute. Why’d she ruin it?). Have a great weekend y’all. I might make next week Charles Hamilton half a week. Dude dropped 3 mixtapes. Stay tuned…-The Infamous O

Hottest Joint: “Doobey In The Ash Tray 2009”

Weakest Joint: “Ballad For The Smokers”

  • Stephflow

    yo u need to review Drake’s So Far Gone. its a dope mixtape n it needs to be here…especially if your going to review his homeboy who is less known

  • Avenger XL

    OK I will agree this guy isn’t bringing much new to the table but really I have seen you give a bad rating at least to many albums much worse than this. Then XXL just gave jim jones an XL.

  • nellz

    idk….i guess i gotta listen..cuz nickelus f usually kills whatever drizzy has 2 say.

  • http://www.myspace.com/kingmezz King Mez

    You guys are wyling…hard

  • http://www.myspace.com/kingmezz King Mez

    Whoever rated this is wylin’…

  • SergioAC

    This is the most haterest thing ive ever heard in my life! You have nooooooo taste in music. This guys lyrical ability is out of this world! He was the Freestyle Friday champion on 106 and Park so yous aying he cant rap makes nooo sense!

    “girls wanna cut, but not many can take the sword… poppin niggas bubbles while their girls inflating ours.”

    “you fibin’ when u spittin, I flip it and get my fabel on/ Aesop rock a beat, repeat, I get my fabel on/ Betcha cant do it like me, I GET MY FABO ON!!”

    “niggas hatin hard around the way cuz now my name is known/ excel around big problems, get my King David on/ Sling shot to the T-O-P S-P-ot/ more checks than Nike cause every bar is a Reebok/ CLASSIC!!”

    That last one had a reference to David and Goliath, but that probally flew right over your head like flies at a cookout.

    You probally cant even comprehend the things he says.

    EVERYBODY, FUCK THIS REVIEW! Download the mixtape and listen to it for yourself. Then Watch his videos on youtube of his freestyle and battles. HE WAS FREESTYLE FRIDAY CHAMPION! That should say enough.

  • Ryuk

    Wow. I wonder if whoever wrote this still works @ XXL.

  • Esso

    This Is First Class Hating At Its Finest. i normally dont cooment about reviews but when i see b.s i like this i must .nickelus F is a great mc and deserves a more credit in this review granted this is ur opinion but u dont have to be a dick about it..this is his dream and he made it happen..why are u so salty? u need to go check his history get that r.a.r.e mixtape he did the portishead….
    sincerly yourz, REVIEW THESE NUTZ

  • http://wreckthedj.com Janah

    This critic is on crack. He’s probably a Plies fan or a Petey Pablo fan. Must be something because NICKELUS F is the most lyrical rapper holding VA down right now, w/out a deal! He came in #2 on J-Electronica’s beat over rappers who are signed to major labels. So this person is a major hater seriously, sick to my stomach.

    • Sergio

      TRU DAT!!!
      FA SHO!!

    • LilCFromVA

      True Stuff. I Think He Had the best over that beat. Better Than Fab, Joell Ortiz, Jay E…. He Is One Of My Favorite Rappers. SEcond Best unsigned Rapper, Next To Joe Budden.

  • http://www.youtube.com yung Gaston

    YALL TRIPPEN N.I.C.K.E.L.U.S F WAT THINK… HE HOTTTTT…

  • Anonymous

    nick iz one of tha best rapperz out right now thiz critic is a dumbass

  • DIRT DAWG of tha EOP

    XXL SUCKS ASS.. the next page probably reads that Soulja boy is the hottest rapper out today and his metaphors keep the listener wanting more
    to the critic: anyone can use big words and say stupid jokes to make an article. HOW DID U GET UR JOB ? when ur taste of music is this bad

  • 804Tmac

    The guy giving the review clearly isnt a mc on any level… my dude nick is too original! No additives! This square jus dont know lyrics when he hear em obviously!

    • LilCFromVA

      Gotta Be a clown, Tmac….

  • http://fisdjfoto.com fisdj

    Yeah this critic is wylin HARD. Please check your staff XXL.

    Nickelus F is one of the most underrated artists out period

  • Aaronb

    What a dumbass. Whoever wrote this is a straight moron.

  • Vinnie Vibez

    I recently did a show with Nickelus F in RVA and the shit was POPPIN. The homie’s makinG alot of backGround moves that REAL G’s will respect one day. So lauGh now cry later.

    RVA STAND UP

    -VIBEZ

  • kelly d

    you should probably check out his new stuff, then. he’s a genius, his flow is sick, and his lyrics have substance. he can spit over beats others wouldn’t dare tackle. his live performances are amazing, as well. you need to go sit in the corner and kick rocks for even mentioning Yung Berg in the same article as Nick.

  • http://hiphoppush.com HipHopPush.com

    LOL crazy review. i think Nick F is alright, he ain’t really lyrical but he does have a few dope lines. You expect everyone who comes out to be a canibus or Jay-Z?

    There aren’t that many lyrical rappers out now a days and their hasn’t been for a while. J-electronica, J-cole, and Locksmith are an exception. So no maybe he’s not super lyrical but he’s not bad to listen to either!