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Nigga stole my chain

Friday May 9 2:42 PM CDT posted by Byron Crawford

People have a tendency to email me whenever there’s anything wrong with this site (i.e. pretty much constantly), as if I do anything here other than take ad hominem shots at rappers and make jokes about my gerkin. Hence, all week long I’ve been fielding emails from mofos wanting to know why XXL has yet to weigh in on the incident.

Of course the suggestion has been that this is part of some grand cover up, as ordered by Fiddy Cent. I know some people have tried to post links to it in the comments section and it wouldn’t show up, which would tend to lend credence to this theory.

But I don’t know. You know the comments section here has been fucked the fuck up. There’s probably all kinds of shit that’s been posted there that never showed up. And now I see Fiddy’s own site, the ridonkulously popular ThisIsFiddy, has gone and posted the footage. So there goes that theory of him not wanting anyone to see it.

That said, I’m sure if Fiddy had it his way, we probably never would have known about this. And I say that for a few reasons.

First of all, if you notice, the shit’s just now showing up on ThisIsFiddy, several days later. Where as when Papoose supposedly snuffed out Fat Joe, he had all sorts of shit having to do with that posted seemingly immediately. Certainly, if Fiddy’s people were too busy to upload their own footage of the incident right away, they could’ve at least posted a link to the clip of it on YouTube.

Then there’s the fact that, where as the version on YouTube is taken all out of context, and is all the more amusing for it, the version on ThisIsFiddy is padded out with footage of smelly Africans fawning over him as if he was Michael Jackson - as if to suggest that they were so touched by his presence in their shit hole of a country that they couldn’t help but to do something crazy.

When I think it’s obvious the real reason that kid snatched Fiddy Cent’s chain is because he figured he could sell it on eBay and be the richest person in his village, if not his entire country. Fuck sending out those spam emails trying to get old people to give out their bank account information - even though I heard some Africans have made a shiteload of money doing that shit.

I’m assuming the real issue is that Fiddy Cent’s main reason being over there was for PR, and he figured if this footage got out, it might have defeated the whole purpose. Which would’ve sucked for him. You’ve seen the clips of him performing there. Imagine how bad it must have smelled in that stadium. I’m sure he could’ve made just as much money performing somewhere else.

I know I saw some shit on MTV where he met with Nelson Mandela. So I’m assuming they might turn that into a whole special - similar to how Jay-Z went over there to have his picture taken with some African kids right around the time when it was announced that he sold the naming rights to the Nets’ stadium in Brooklyn to a bank that funded the slave trade.

Which makes me wonder what it was the two of them discussed. My guess: baby mama drama. Fiddy Cent recently had to kick his baby’s mother out of one of his homes, and I heard the first thing Nelson Mandela did when he got out of prison was drop his wife like a bad habit. Also, they’ve both done time, so maybe they traded tales of when dudes tried to test them in the shower.

But I digress.

Probably the worst case scenario would’ve been if one of the local officials, concerned with the effect this might have on tourism, hunted the kid down and chopped his arm off at the elbow or some shit. Which I’m assuming is the reason the kid’s mom made him turn himself in - especially given how much money they probably could have made if they’d kept the chain and sold it.

If Fat Joe would’ve been thinking, he would’ve found the kid himself and bought the chain from him, just so he could wear it on TV and be like, “I got yo chain, nigga!” Shit, if I was him, I would’ve bought the chain and the African kid and brought him on tour with me as if he was Kid Rock’s midget. Or would that have been a bit too offensive? What do you Africans think? Speak on it.

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This entry was posted on Friday, May 9th, 2008 at 2:42 pm and is filed under Bloggers, Bol's Saturday Night Workout
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50 Comments »

May 9th, 2008
at 2:55 pm

dubbzz says:

Lol,man that video to was to grainy for me to see him actually get the chain…but 50 stay rappin about how he will die for his chain..haha

May 10th, 2008
at 7:38 pm

Tru lizzy says:

well if u actually saw the video like i did on a beautiful 26′in LCD u would have saw 50 jump in the crowd after his chain lol u mad dumass

 

May 12th, 2008
at 1:06 pm

MOE says:

AT THE END OF THE DAY 50 IS STILL A BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITCH! FUCK THAT DENTURES WEARING GORILLA.

 
 

May 9th, 2008
at 2:57 pm

Combat Jack says:

“”Fuck sending out those spam emails trying to get old people to give out their bank account information - even though I heard some Africans have made a shiteload of money doing that shit.”

^ Would you believe, back when I was guest writing on your site, wifey got caught up in some bs scheme by those shady ass Nigerians. Long story short, she deposited a bogus check from them original niggers and the feds ended up shutting not only her bank accounts, BUT MINE as well, on some “homeland security” shit. Nigger couldnt get his $$$ out the bank for like a cotdamned month while they investigated US and not them smelly ass motherland hustlers. Couldnt buy pampers, pizza and Newports for like 30 days B!!!

May 10th, 2008
at 3:16 pm

Chaka says:

“smelly ass motherland hustlers”.That not the right word.The right word for ‘those shady ass Nigerians’ is 4.1.9 boys or Yahoo boys.Thats what they are called out here.But the goverment out here are doing a lot to shut down their operations.If any of you out there have lost your money to 4.1.9 boys then try and contact EFCC(Economic Financial Crime Commission).Google the name.Believe me they will help you to get your money back.Peace

 
 

May 9th, 2008
at 3:19 pm

snitch says:

1st!!!!haha

 

May 9th, 2008
at 3:24 pm

Go back 2 africa says:

“If Fat Joe would’ve been thinking, he would’ve found the kid himself and bought the chain from him, just so he could wear it on TV and be like, “I got yo chain, nigga!” Shit, if I was him, I would’ve bought the chain and the African kid and brought him on tour with me as if he was Kid Rock’s midget.”

LMAO Oh yeah, I love women from africa, every time I smash 1, it’s like “Going back 2 Africa!” I’m like let’s fuck in the woods, hold on to that tree, and if you let go I’m a snatch that bone out ya nose…

May 12th, 2008
at 1:04 pm

moe says:

dude…log off and go take your meds.

 
 

May 9th, 2008
at 3:24 pm

Bol says:

I supposed I’d be remiss if I didn’t find some way to work this in:

http://niggastolemybike.ytmnd.com/

 

May 9th, 2008
at 3:27 pm

Begotten Sun says:

Bol you’re a trypical slef loathing shiiite for brains… “Smelly Africans”… U talking about our people, human beings… on a mainstream shite like this…

Go fuck yourself u homo-daughter of a slave…

watch then censore this comment.

 

May 9th, 2008
at 3:28 pm

Apollo Moses says:

Deezam CJ that sucks donkey ballz!(nullus) But yeah them Nigerian negroes will get you on the watch list. Never respond to emails about possible family members or folks that share your last name but recently killed in an accident in the motherland…and don’t even dream that you can get in on a scam for that oil money. Them fools even got diss songs clowning wannbe rich quick Americans….Is that Hip Hop???

 

May 9th, 2008
at 3:29 pm

$ykotic says: Subscribed to comments via email

“If Fat Joe would’ve been thinking, he would’ve found the kid himself and bought the chain from him, just so he could wear it on TV and be like, “I got yo chain, nigga!” Shit, if I was him, I would’ve bought the chain and the African kid and brought him on tour with me as if he was Kid Rock’s midget.”

LMFAO!!! Son you are wild with it. But that would’ve been gangster! Would’ve been KING for the rest of the year! 100

 

May 9th, 2008
at 4:12 pm

Yayza says:

Publicity stunt for his shitty new game in which pretty much that same thing happens, storyline-wise (Chain gets snatched in Africa). I don’t want to go much deeper on the subject, because any time spent typing about 50 is wasted time, but then again I don’t have a whole lot to do anyway…

May 10th, 2008
at 7:44 pm

Tru lizzy says:

Publicity stunt for what he richer than favorite rapper(lil wayne garbage ass). so u must not now how poor they are in africa
so how about u go over there with a chain and then they kill u for it and i never have to read your dumass comments

 
 

May 9th, 2008
at 4:16 pm

Mr. Alex says:

“Imagine how bad it must’ve smelled in that stadium” . . . LOL. You’re probably right though.

May 10th, 2008
at 3:00 pm

Chaka says:

@Mr. Alex,
Why dont you imagine how your mother’s pussy was smelling when you came out of that stinking worn out thing.Low life racist.Peace

May 10th, 2008
at 3:20 pm

Chaka says:

Revised edition:

@Mr. Alex,
Why dont you imagine how bad your mother’s pussy was smelling when you came out of that stinking worn out thing.Low life racist.Peace

 
 
 

May 9th, 2008
at 4:25 pm

major says:

damn fat joe shoulda been thinkin! he could have officially ja ruled 50 ass..damn!!!! lol

 

May 9th, 2008
at 4:37 pm

gside says:

Bo are you racist you hate African sound like it, like your on some better than you shit. Like nigga over here would’nt snatch that chain giving chance. I susepcted you were bitch made this poves it’s you nigga hating nigga .

 

May 9th, 2008
at 5:07 pm

Andrew Barber says:

This shit right here is hilarious.

 

May 9th, 2008
at 5:09 pm

dat koon nigga says:

I IZ DONZ THINKZ THATSZ AFRICANZ NIGGAZ IZ DA ONEZ WHOZ I IZ BUYZ DEMZ BOOTLEGZ BLUZ G-UNITZ CD’Z FROM DA PASTZ 5 YEARZ

BOI YOUZ IZ DA FUNNTZ AZZ KOON

 

May 9th, 2008
at 5:35 pm

BL says:

PUNK ASS 50′S SCARED FOR HIS LITTLE IMAGE.FORGET FAT JOE - WHAT’S GAME WAITING FOR?!?!! I HEARD THAT THE CHAIN WAS JUST A REPLICA BUT IF IT WAS REAL, HEY, THINGS HAPPEN. ANYBODY REMEMBER THE SONG “HOW TO ROB”? LOL. THAT’S PROBABLY THE SAME COUNTRY THEM DIAMONDS CAME FROM ANYWAY. SO WHILE THOSE “POOR” AFRICANS NEVER BENEFIT FROM THE WEALTH THAT GENERATES FROM THEIR LAND, THESE DUMB NIGGERS GIVE THEIR ROYALTY CHECK TO A WHITE PERSON IN EXCHANGE OF THOSE SAME PRECIOUS STONES. KEEP LAUGHING FROM CRYING. BTW, BOL YOU LOOK LIKE A SMELLY AFRICAN LOLLL

 

May 9th, 2008
at 6:19 pm

The Chancellor says:

“Ya man joey crack, I told Him before,
he dont want it with me, You pussy fat boy!”

G-Unit.

 

May 9th, 2008
at 6:39 pm

african killa bee says:

yo bol!!may be angola’s poor but for sur it’s richer than your projects full of crackheads this country has oil!!
don’t forget that you motherfuckin slaves ‘re all coming in africa in order to entertain us!
we got enough monney to pay your biggest stars!
we the boss we pay and you dance like bitches on the stage for us motherfuckers!
africans americans =lazy,crackheads,prostitutes,slaves!
how can a lazy crackhead son of a prostitute, feels superior to a african??
you’re good for nothing at least keep entertain us!clowns!!

 

May 9th, 2008
at 7:31 pm

Kane Corleone says:

@ Ease…….You gotta think who the fuck wears a hunnid thousand or million dollar chain on tour ? that shit has to be fugazzi 50 didnt even try to chase dude or nothin no security runnin after them,those niggas would be fired(but on a side note u know them africans walk around with choppers and shit)

May 10th, 2008
at 7:46 pm

Tru lizzy says:

50 did jump in the crowd if u saw video dumazz

 
 

May 9th, 2008
at 7:49 pm

RisingSon says:

FUCK YOU! Ignorant ass AFRICAN-American.

 

May 9th, 2008
at 8:07 pm

CHICAGO PaPii says:

Fuck 50! Sike the Nizza is the most entertaing rapper that DOESN’T say anything that belongs on a “Hip-Hop Quotable”. This mofo obviously was scurred as fuck about the whole gettin his Chain Snatch by a AfriKan that he barely let Footage of the shit get out. Besides him being a Federal Informant and Interscope Publicity Pet(ask yo Mama!), his main quality his Pain-In-Thee-Arse Humor. Then again XXL Mag take major L’s for letting Ferrari F. tell these wankers what to do. O.N.E.

 

May 9th, 2008
at 9:27 pm

geico lizard says:

there are also some scams where they go on dating sites and pretend to be women who live in another country and try to get guys to send them money to buy a plane ticket or to pay for medicine for a family member.i think one guy busted them because they wouldnt let him buy a non refundable ticket to america they acted like they had to buy the ticket from whatever country they were pretending to be in.

 

May 9th, 2008
at 10:26 pm

DJ Daddy Mack says:

“If Fat Joe would’ve been thinking, he would’ve found the kid himself and bought the chain from him, just so he could wear it on TV and be like, “I got yo chain, nigga!” Shit, if I was him, I would’ve bought the chain and the African kid and brought him on tour with me as if he was Kid Rock’s midget.”

LLOLLLLLLLLLL. DAT WOULD HAVE BEEN GREAT.

 

May 9th, 2008
at 10:57 pm

jg420 says:

Bol you are the man, and the line about Fat Joe is another classic. Keep it up

 

May 10th, 2008
at 2:00 am

Gzus says:

Nah son, watch the footage Fif actually jumped in after kid…. Fuckin ballsy if you ask me, jumpin in with thousands of crazy AfRicans. But yeah doubt the shit he was rockin was real shines. Its the principle tho
Anyone can get stole on, its what you do about that counts.

 

May 10th, 2008
at 3:04 am

mtsu says:

bol….i hate your blogs, but i love to read’em.

 

May 10th, 2008
at 6:20 am

raoul says:

Bol, come to South Africa and you’ll see that we have the same shit you got, if not more.

Check for info on South Africa on Google.
You’ll never regret coming here.

BTW, THE CHICKS ARE XXTRA HOT!!

 

May 10th, 2008
at 8:19 am

PHATSAM says:

the shit thats not being said is that 50 jumped in the crowd to in africA TO GET HIS CHAIN HOW MANY OF YOUR FAV RAPPERS WOULD HAVE DONE THAT .

May 10th, 2008
at 11:34 am

o.g. says: Subscribed to comments via email

1. 50 did not jump into the crowd-watch the video again…he just stands there and then PUSHES the security guard into the audience to chase the kid, then he (50) stands there shook–then after the fact he makes a clearly half assed attempt at going down in the audience to try to save face…he was just standing there shook lmao

2. he did not get his chain back—the kids mom made him turn himself in several days later…wait a minute–turn himself in???!?? oh yeah, that must mean 50 went to the cops…lmao!

3. no disrespect man, but how old are you? you honstley beleive that 50 wanted to fight a kid in fukin angola!?!?–those kids are in the army holding literally holding ak47s by the age of 5–high as fuck on meth and diesel killing everything in sight like its thier only fuckin purpose on earth…get real man,shit in places like angola and city of gods brazil is way too fuckin real…50 is an actor, an entertainer–u see him standing there dont you?!? you see him push security down into the audience dont you?!? you know he could have grabbed the kid and fought him on stage don’t you?!? why didn’t he do that you ask?–cuz he knew better than to make a bad situation worse by possibly gettin ktfo on stage in a 1 on 1 fist fight…this was the funniest shit i’ve ever seen in my life…

4. singing i get money etc. while wearing a $300,000 blood diamond chain on stage in africa and getting straight up JACKED 1 on 1 in front of the whole world—fuckin priceless!!!

May 10th, 2008
at 2:54 pm

Chaka says:

@o.g.,
My brother you have been watching too much movies and they are messing with your head.You cannot even seperate fiction from reality.Who told you that kids at the age of 5(or any other age) carry ak47 in Angola?Do you you think there is war every where in Africa.Who says every region in Africa has diamond.Man you people out there know nothing about the people here in Africa that why you keep on acting silly films about us.Peace.

May 10th, 2008
at 6:08 pm

o.g. says: Subscribed to comments via email

i’m half angolan, my little brother got killed at age 8 in 2000 fighting man…no one is trying to sterotype the country…but its true that theres a lot of shit going on there man, just cus the civil war ended doesn’t mean its all good now…why is it that people from countries with huge, huge gaps between the rich and poor (russia, uae, india, nigeria, ghana etc.) always feel the need to try and prove how rich they are and how much they are “ballin” over in thier countries? like that shit is cool or something–yeah, the rich people in those countries are CRAZY rich, but we all no what the fuck is going on with the 90% of the people who aren’t on the rich side….they ride phantoms in moscow but go literally 1/2 mile outside of the little city center and poeple are in the worst conditions u could ever fuckin concieve…trying to show how rich a country is that suffers from these huge economic gaps is just feeding into this fuckin capitalist bullshit…THERE ARE FUCKIN PROBLEMS IN ANGOLA MAN…and blacks as a whole need to stop letting thier (our) insecurties to keep them frontin–we got to admit there are problems before we can fix them…we have health issues in the black community-time to step up and admit that soul (slave) food is nothing to be proud of–its killing us-we were forced to eat that shit as slaves–time to move on…black people we have a problem with child abouse in our community–we got beat as slaves and keep beating our kids like its our culture–its not our culture–its a fuckin slave culture..that child abuse is fuckin us up man, fuckin up how we treat woman, fuckin up how we percieve the world…we got some real problems in the hip hop community–we got real problems in africa…i could go on forever man…we got to admit to a lot of shit going on before we can fix it…one.

 

May 10th, 2008
at 8:15 pm

Chaka says:

@o.g.,
Yeah I agree with you my brother we have got problems in Africa.M not denying that.But generalizing the situation of a particular region like it is the whole of Africa that is faced with the same situation,is what I cannot accept.Sorry about what happened to your brother.May God refresh his innocent spirit.Peace.

 
 
 
 

May 10th, 2008
at 9:12 am

Kufi smacker says:

south Africa = instant aids. You can keep those HOT chicks to yourself. Google it, about 40% of pregnant women in your racist ass cracker run South Africa have Hiv

 

May 10th, 2008
at 11:13 am

dsl says:

hahaha “If Fat Joe would’ve been thinking, he would’ve found the kid himself and bought the chain from him, just so he could wear it on TV and be like, “I got yo chain, nigga!” Shit, if I was him, I would’ve bought the chain and the African kid and brought him on tour with me as if he was Kid Rock’s midget. Or would that have been a bit too offensive? What do you Africans think? Speak on it.”

Thats crazy shit my negro, word up.

 

May 10th, 2008
at 2:33 pm

Chaka says:

@Bol,
You are one dumb brother.First you refer to our people as “smelly Africans” then you went on to say the sale of 50cent’s cain can make an individual the richest person in a whole nation in Africa!Do you think we are that poor over here?The money from the sale of 50cent’s cain is beer money which guys over here spend every weekend in the club on one sitting.Without saying much,I will advise you to come over here and visit places like Lagos,Abuja,Accra,Dakar,Lome,Jburg,e.t.c.Then you will see that you all are totally ignorant about us.The places I mentioned are far more developed than your projects and are even better than most of your lovely cities.Jay z,Snoop,Guru,DMX,Wyclef,Foxy,KCI&Jojo,and many of your stars who have been here can testify to this.Peace an hip hop head in Africa wrote this.

 

May 10th, 2008
at 11:31 pm

daaaammmmm homie! says: Subscribed to comments via email

for once and for all…50 is LYING on his website–they did not beat the kid up in the audience and 50 did not push the guard aside to get the kid…50 pushed the guard down into the crowd to get the kid for him…then 50 stands there shell shocked for a minute and finally realizes he has to jump down or else he will look like even more of a fruitcake…here is the the quote from the angolan papers: (how much u wanna bet xxlmag censors this shit and doesn’t post it–fuckin lames)

Police in Angola arrested the man accused of jumping on stage and snatching the chain off of superstar rapper 50 Cent during a concert at Cidadela Pavilion in Luanda.
Police Superintendent Carlos Mota revealed that officials had apprehended Bruno Carvalho, who hopped on the stage as 50 Cent and G-Unit performed and stanched the rapper’s diamond chain.

According to The Angola Press, Carvalho was turned over to authorities by his own parents yesterday (May 4), after footage of the incident hit the Internet and spread throughout the world.

Carvalho will face criminal charges for his role in the 50 Cent chain snatching incident, which took place last Wednesday (April 30) during the annual International Peace Festival.”

…incase u are wondering-his parents turned him because they were afraid for his life–50 launched a massive police with hunt for the kid (u knw how 50 loves to call the police!–and angolan police are no joke-ANYTHING can happen when they get u) so his parents turned him in…50 DID NOT GET HIS CHAIN BACK…

 

May 12th, 2008
at 4:15 am

Dra$t-iQ Alkoholik says:

man fuck you you racist cunt homo-son of a slave. but 50 a bitch his chain got snatched in africa nigga,and the nigga claim he a thug damn1 y’all niggas gotta cum back to the motherland and see how real g’s collide the kid was no soldier jus a youngster out to punk a faggot and Bol you faggot make sure you don’t come to africa or any of your relatives too coz we gon take em out for that stinky stadium shit you put up here.FAGGOT

 

May 12th, 2008
at 9:10 am

Maverick, real nigga! says:

Firstly fuck u, u ignorant bitch: YEAH NIGGER YOU BOL. Do u actually believe this shit that the whites teach you about Arica, in your shitty Public Schools?

 

May 12th, 2008
at 9:43 am

EReal says:

Ignorance abounds.

Yeah, go ahead and end up in a phuckin south african jail for beating on a minor that stole your windex chain, when you’re worth 400 Mil, that sounds real smart. Better yet, pull out a gun, in front of 30,000 people and blow his brains on the floor, thats even smarter.

You children are hilarious. Talkin bout Fat Joe, what happened the last time Fat Joe was around police, oh yeah, he RATTED. Not only in NY, but in Miami too. The kid’s MOM made him turn himself in, 50 didnt even press charges, you kids are dummies.

Grow Up. Its entertainment, I guess Immortal Tech should kill the president. Sean P should stomp out your grill, MOP should mash you out, Jedi Mind Tricks should pull your spine out, and the Cash Money click are all real O.G. Bloods, and Game is a real PIRU. *SMH*

 

May 12th, 2008
at 10:09 am

ahaha says:

lol, internet

 

May 12th, 2008
at 10:41 am

c. gabi says:

Damn Bol, these Africans are mad as hell!

That is all.

 

May 12th, 2008
at 11:56 am

Dra$t-iQ Alkoholik says:

fuck you you faggot son of a slave what the fuck you talking bout all that bul shit bout the lil kid being the richest niga in the country after he sells that shit nigga I got more money than you and am African in the motherland. nigga your whole family put together earns what I spend in a week you faggot,come thru to Africa and see real thugs nigga not that 50cent cunt who got robbed bya lil kid nigga real 26,27,28 gangstas cum to South Africa and you’ll understand those numbers nigga

 

May 13th, 2008
at 7:51 pm

BIGNAT says:

tham bol this is 2 funny
“When I think it’s obvious the real reason that kid snatched Fiddy Cent’s chain is because he figured he could sell it on eBay and be the richest person in his village, if not his entire country.”
that was funny but this is what put this post over the top

“If Fat Joe would’ve been thinking, he would’ve found the kid himself and bought the chain from him, just so he could wear it on TV and be like, “I got yo chain, nigga!” Shit, if I was him, I would’ve bought the chain and the African kid and brought him on tour with me as if he was Kid Rock’s midget.”

hahahahhaha

 

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