T.I. didn’t really save anybody

What if the incident yesterday in which T.I. supposedly talked a jumper down from the ledge, like in that Third Eye Blind song, was all part of an elaborate scheme by T.I. himself and the Feds to help him avoid jail time?

Here, let me explain.

As revealed in a post over at Vlad TV, the incident was almost certainly a publicity stunt, because it took place the day before T.I. is set to appear before a judge to be sentenced for violating the terms of his probation, in the incident I discussed here yesterday, when he got caught driving himself around in a Maybach, with a pocket full of drugs black people, people with money, and people with sense in general don’t usually fux wit, as they say on Black People Twitter.

If it would have been, say, two weeks ago, that would have been one thing. But yesterday? That’s just too convenient. And as we learned in the movie JFK and also the Big Lebowski (the ’90s >), you… uggh, look for the one who stands to benefit.

If you’re T.I., and you’re looking at the prospect of spending several more months in jail (even though this is literally your gozillionth offense), when you just got out of jail for like a year, and your career is in the state that it’s in, as discussed here yesterday, you kinda have to cite the fact that you prevented a guy from killing himself, in court today, right? Even if it was someone dumb enough that they were going to kill themselves, but they opted not to, for the chance to meet motherfucking T.I., and hence someone who probably should have gone through with it. It’s not like we almost lost a cure for cancer.

This is one of those situations where you try anything anway. And I’m sure T.I. would try just about anything, if he had the sheer balls to suggest to the court that his sentencing in that gun case should be reduced in exchange for him going around to elementary schools and explaining to kids how they could grow up to be just like him. He never got to go to very many schools, once parents caught wind of this BS. But I guess that show he did on MTV also counted towards him getting off easy. Bonus! If only he could do one of those shows every time he has to go to jail. It’s a good that guy was about to kill himself.

But what would T.I. have done if that guy didn’t almost kill himself?

That’s a trick question. There couldn’t have been a scenario in which T.I. didn’t conveniently save a guy’s life the day before his sentencing, because it was planned all along. They may have even come up with it way back when T.I. first got out, before this most recent arrest, because they figured T.I.’s judgment is so weak, and his wife is on so many drugs that it was only a matter of time before he got caught riding dirty. They knew they were going to have to come up with an excuse for how T.I. managed to avoid serving a significant amount of time yet again, but they already exhausted everything that was even remotely reasonable a couple of years ago. This would require a miracle – er, somethat that seemed like a miracle.

The evidence lies in that fact that, as revealed in that post over on Vlad TV, which really has become a bastion of hip-hop journalism, not only did this incident conveniently take place the day before T.I. was set to be sentenced, it took place on the roof of a hip-hop radio station, on a day when T.I. just so happened to be nearby with a full staff of PR people. DJ Vlad says you can’t even get inside this station, let alone onto the roof, unless someone calls down to give you access. You know how these hip-hop stations have to have very strict security, what with these dumbass rappers shooting each other in the lobby, and trying to intimidate people into buying their shitty homemade CDs.

And the reason I suspect the Feds were involved is because I just saw a video of T.I. commenting on the incident (presumably taped afterwards), and there were all sorts of stormtroopers in the background. That little stunt probably cost the state or whoever a lot of money. There’s gonna have to be a thorough investigation. And at some point during this investigation, they’re gonna have to answer questions like, how did this guy (who’s obviously not that smart) get out on the ledge in the first place, and how in the fuck did motherfucking T.I. manage to get involved? What kind of police station lets a rapper assist with a potential suicide?

  • these posts are racist

    You have no proof it was a publicity stunt. Just hate.

    • El Tico Loco

      You’re right there’s no proof, but the circumstances point that way. First you know security is tight inside skyscrapers just to get to an office and this dude ended up on the roof that’s flag one. Flag two, how do you get involved in a negotiation; better yet, enter the scene of a negotiation without credentials? I was not there of course but since I’m familiar with the area I know that traffic is always bananas even if the streets weren’t blocked, and I’m sure they were, and he just so happen to be in the area and allowed to enter? mmmm not likely under normal circumstances. Then it was at the building the hip hop radio station is in? Two days before court? Why did he had to address the fact that it wasn’t a pub stunt?

      If you do something from the heart you do your deed and keep it pushing, there’s no need to explain shit to anybody.

  • T.I.

    Sucka nigaa I keeps it real now tell me where the meth at. Ay, ay, ay, ay!

  • AR-KKK-ANSAS

    BOL YOU sir are a humuman turd (made from the cheapest of government cheese, taco bell, and dirty Racoon me <notice I said ra–coon? get it chump? I used to find your post funny but the more I read them the more I know (how much you really hate yourself AND your brothern! so HERES MY SUGGESTION TO YOU! come to little rock, ar 4500 stock street apt.14 and I’ll give you a brand new out the box stollen 40calliber handgun and a full clip walk down the street a little, and stand in the middle of the road ok. Now put the gun into your mouth at an upward angle so the projectile of the bullet goes up through your cranium cavity. Reason being so no innocent bystanders are hurt by a piece of BLACC MONKEY SHIT DOING WHAT GOD LOVES. YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN ON A FUCCING NAPKIN SOMEWEHRE INSTEAD OF FERTILIZING AN EGG WHICH MADE YOU!!! KILL YOUSELF PLEASE!GOT DAMN RACE TRADER, FIRST I THOUGH U WERE FUNNY NOW UR A GOT DAMN JOKE!!!

    • AR-KKK-ANSAS

      OH, YEAR FAGGOTS AND I’M BLACC!!!

  • AR-KKK-ANSAS

    OH yeah, and by the way I’m blacc!!! succaz,now if your to scared I can point you about 3 bloccs down and they will do it for you!!!

    • AR-KKK-ANSAS

      I LOVE BLACK COCK IN MY MOUTH! YUM YUM GIMME SUM!

  • D90

    Are the people commenting on this post really so stupid they believe that TI really saved sum1 frum jumpin cuz he gave a shit? GTFOH that shit was planed jus like that fire that was lit in the courthouse the day wayne was supposed 2 be sentenced. TI is retarded on so many levels that he not only shows the shittyest judgement known 2 man, but he also insults every1s intelligence by setting this stunt up 2 gain sympathy and then expecting people 2 believe it.

  • benjy

    spot on as always byron. holla back wodie

  • pmackey

    TI had that show helping kids so he could shave alota years off a mando 10piece?, the guy DJ AM had the show helping kids with drug abuse and he’s high as a kite (oxy,crack, anything) MTV stop putting these lying hiphop people on tv with fucked up kids, im a fan BOL keep exposing these fruits. I cant log on you website without a big Verizon secrurity screen saying virus detected on your page, i think its time to take that boycott israel line off, its holdng you back.

    • http://www.yzhood.com/ www.yzhood.com

      o wow T.I

  • http://definitelyeatinb.tumblr.com B

    I actually believed Lil Tip just happened to be there in a case of extreme coincidence but you have successfully changed my mind… well done.

  • Pierzy

    I take it up the ass

  • Pierzy’s Wife

    ^^^

    Yeah baby I know you do!

  • http://www.bboycult.com Don mcCaine

    IDK about the “staging”…

    Wouldn’t it have been easier for Tip to do charity for the homeless or poor in front of mass media?

    Staging a suicide event where L.E. is involved, especially when you can get charged with falsifying an event would be too risky…ask that broad who threw acid in her own face what happens when you do that for attention…

    • Kev

      All the dude has to do is keep saying he was really gonna jump and find somebody who alerted TI. The acid in the face bitch was dumb enough to tell people she bought sunglasses at 8pm to wear minutes before she got the acid in the face which explained why she wasn’t blinded.

  • Enlightened

    “I talked that nigga down from the roof in 5 minutes.” (takes a pull of cigarette) “But it took me 6 months to talk that crazy nigga into gettin up there.”
    - Don Cheadle as Petey Greene in “Talk to Me” laughing about how he got out of prison early because he made a deal with the warden

  • caino

    l’m not sure what to feel about this, l mean are we giving TI to much credit for staging this?? l mean this is a guy that chauffers himself around in his own Maybach consuming drugs even l wouldnt touch! (bazinga!)

    but then again , saving a suicide victim(does that make sense?)the fact it was on a roof of a hiphop radio station, the fact it was 2 days before he goes to court!! somthing aint right!!

  • thestunna

    Look like Byron’s more than likely rite on this. A source from V103 is basically echoing what hes sayin its on mediatakeout

  • Atlanta is full of Flakes

    .

  • Dub

    Are we talkin about the same dumbass TI who got caught with the pills and the weed a few months after being released from prison? Nigga ain’t think of anything THAT elaborate… And why do people keep thinking the FEDs have this huge interest in protecting him… FEDs ain’t get Bernie Madoff outta jail why the fuck you think the FEDs wanna help some rapper

  • Kev

    Yall are some dumb ass marks if you believe this shit is legit.

    If this was real TI wouldn’t get notified some dude was up threatening to jump before the po-po got there. If you worked at the desk and somebody told you somebody is up trying to jump off a roof, are you gonna call 911 or some rapper? In a panic you’d call the cops.

    So yall think po-po is gonna let this fool up on some charges go up on a roof just cause he’s famous? Or the hotel or radio station sent TI to go save the day before calling 5-0? And all this one day before he’s up on a charge? Fuck no. Faker than fake.

  • GOD OR SNITCH?

    1. Miracles do manifest to those who move out on faith. T.I. could be walking with the lord Christ. AMEN.

    2. The government would only assist T.I. to this extent if he was snitching on high level crime figures. I don’t think he is a snitch but I wouldn’t entirely rule it out.

  • Anonymous

    believehalf ofwhat usee nothing u hear ti works for the feds the real king louisiana stand up

  • nkem

    This article has hate written all over it! go fuck yaself mr writer ure just some East Coast dude acting jealous, coz u guys are always hating, matter of fact u should be called Hate Coast for all the bullshit u spread .