It’s too late to ‘pologize

Kanye West keeps apologizing for snatching the mic out of Taylor Swift’s hands at the VMAs, as if anyone gives a shit.

I could see if he went on the View, or some show where you’d suspect that a significant amount of the audience wouldn’t like the idea of a 30-something black man interrupting a teenage white girl’s award acceptance speech to inform her that her video wasn’t as good as the video of some black chick who looks like she was conjured from the depths of R. Crumb’s subconscious (presumably the main draw of the video for “Single Ladies,” which doesn’t consist of anything other than Beyonce in her underwear dancing like a retard doing the hokey pokey at an adult day care center). I know Kanye was trying to crack that audience of middle aged white women with 808s & Heartbreak, either because he figured that was an appropriate market for that kind of music, or because Oprah or somebody explained to him that they’ll buy pretty much anything they see advertised on daytime TV. (Maybe his big brother told him that.) I know he debuted the video for “Love Lockdown” on the Ellen DeGeneres Show. I wonder if she did that dumbass dance she does at the beginning of the show. It’s not like I was doing anything the day he was on, but I wasn’t about to watch that shit. It’s On with Alexa Chung, on the other hand…

Some cracka-ass crackas probably never will get over the incident at last year’s VMAs, but I don’t think most hip-hop heads ever really gave a shit. I was more concerned with the fact that Kanye thought that “Single Ladies” was one of the best music videos of all time, of ALL TIME. “Single Ladies” wasn’t even one of the best music videos of that year, let alone of all time. “Losing My Religion” was one of the best music videos of all time. No homo. I don’t even know what it was about, but that shit felt important to me. (That’s how you know it’s real art.) Beyonce didn’t do shit in the video for “Single Ladies” but stand there and jiggle. And I’ve seen much better videos where a woman didn’t do shit but stand there and jiggle while a song plays in the background. It’s too bad none of them were eligible for a Video Music Award, because they weren’t music videos per se, and – more likely – because the TIs didn’t have anything to do with them. I might need to speak to someone at MTV about this. Who gives a shit whether or not something is a real, according to Hoyle music video? This is 2010 – we all have our different ways of listening to bad music. I know MTV has been beefing with the major labels anyway (both of them), because the TIs are trying to charge them money to play music videos. Tha fuck?

I think I see a way out of this!

It’s obvious to me that Kanye is just trying to ride the incident at last year’s VMAs for what it’s worth. I don’t buy for a minute that he’s really sorry for what he did, or that it had anything to do with the state his career is in. His career was already spiraling out anyway, because he was running out of ideas. If he could have put out another rap album on a par with Graduation, instead of motherfucking 808s & Heartbreak, he would have, never mind his fiance finally growing tired of his shit (I might still need to holler), and his mom dying in a tragic plastic surgery mishap. Similarly, I heard on the radio that this past weekend, while I was working like a Hebrew slave at the BGM, Kanye went on Twitter and tried to link the death of his own clothing line before it even began, as if it was one of Drew Barrymore’s kids, to his stunt at the VMAs. As if he’d invested all of this time and money and effort into launching it, and it was something people would actually want to buy, but then the Jewish guy in charge was like, “I’m sorry, Kanye. Everything else is in place, but I can’t go into business with someone who ruined Taylor Swift’s moment like that.” (You know how Jewish guys are about blondes.) Let me guess: Kanye insisted on doing the designs himself, and they didn’t look like anything a straight guy would wear, and even a lot of teh ghey people didn’t really care for them, and so the people who were really in charge pulled the plug. This may have happened at more or less the same time as the VMAs, but no one with the sense god gave geese will believe the one had anything to do with the other.

  • Worley

    I’m tired of people apologizing period. Everybody pulls a stunt and then says sorry or, even worse, gets on TV crying. Forget that. Think about what you do first. If people don’t like it then f*ck ‘em. No more damn apologizing.

  • dat k00n nigga

    damn cracker ass jewz

    do you kow if the jew in question called kanye a Shvartzer ?

    also talking about hip hop kikes do you still keep in contact with peter (MC jew boyz)and jew last name berg ?

    • that nigga

      (presumably the main draw of the video for “Single Ladies,” which doesn’t consist of anything other than Beyonce in her underwear dancing like a retard doing the hokey pokey at an adult day care center
      :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
      My day sucked, I really needed a laugh. Thanks Bol and dat koon nigga!!

      hahahaha, wow!! “MC Jew Boy”!! Thats Peter Rosenberg you mean!

  • mandingo

    Hahahahahah

  • Chilly Willy

    I think Kanye’s apology is meant to keep his name in people’s mouth (people who wouldn’t know anything in music if not for MTV, i.e. retards) for the buzz because, you know, retards still buy music and retards money is as good as your money. But also to make his real fans react by saying fuck apology, get over it you country ass bitch!
    Which explains the ode to the asshole and the social network flick’s score.

    On another note, while he was a dick with it, he was still right. Beyoncé won video OF THE YEAR, but couldn’t win female video of the same fuckin’ year, and that still makes sense to some of y’all ?

  • SOMETHIN NEW

    Kanye is straight bitch made.That’s all,every time i see the dude he’s bitchin and moanin over shit that really ain’t all that real.

    And he wonders why people keep refering to him as a homosexual.The last time i seen a man do some of the things he do like showin bitch emotions and throwin a fit and acting fruity on stage was Little Richard on the American Music Awards back in 92.

  • http://www.bboycult.com $yk

    I thought this was supposed to be about good music (no pun).

    I don’t understand how cats totally scrutinize Kanye’s character, yet overlook Ross’, then believe what T.I. says on wax, and hate Em because of his race.

    • http://www.emcdl.com EmCDL

      ^^^this

  • nicholasdelorejo

    Considering how albums sales are so low now that going gold is the best that artists can ope for, labels need some cost efficient way to get the consumer attention and desire topurchase albums. Releasing successful singles doesn’t work (see B.o.B), internet campaigns don’t work (Slaughter House), and neither does continuous promotion (Drake considering the amount of promotion given to him didn’t outweigh the amount of albums he sold). People today have very low attention spans and unless your a die hard fan people won’t care to remember to purchase music from an artist they may like. So gimmicks and controversy is necessary for artists to even be in the minds of the masses. Janelle Monae released arguably the best album this year and very few people know about it, but Kanye snatched the microphone of some blonde country singer and people are pretty much anxious to even read the tweets he hired other people to write. People want to hear his new album just to either praise/defend him or to trash him. I hope for Jay-z sake, his new album has guest features from Aleister Crowley and Lucifer.

  • Choc

    The comments seem to never be about the Music(you should know this by now)

    “Don’t ever fix your lips like collagen/To say somethin where you gon end up Appologen”

    I heard that line from somewhere? LOL

  • Jerod.

    Dragon Ball Z is the shit.

  • http://www.bboycult.com $yk

    Only 9 comments?

    heavy moderation 2nite…

    # Choc

    I know, just noticing a heavyweight double standard with this rap thing.

  • HellNaw

    Bored of Taylor Swift and Kanye.Bored of people apologizing for doing stuff after being messed up off some liquid class A.NO Kid Cudi.

    Stick to dropping albums like College Dropout and Graduation, chuck in some dope beats like ‘Brooklyn Go Hard’ and ‘Swagga Like Us’ and we cool Kanye.

  • that nigga

    I hope for Jay-z sake, his new album has guest features from Aleister Crowley and Lucifer.
    :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

    Damn, mo’fuckers goin in today.

  • http://davidfrank.bandcamp.com D Frank

    Man I’m Jewish and you will never see me with anytype of blonde know that. Fuck an aryan. But you were right on the money when you said we dislike our own women even more than black dudes. I will most definitely fuck with Rachel from the Yeshiva before I fuck with Courtney or Christy from St Augustine Catholic Church. I’m trying to find me an Ethiopian right now thats where its at.

  • cmoney91

    drew barrymore had kids? lol

  • Gloveson

    Maybe jus maybe, the whole reason Kanye turned up to last years VMA’s with a bottle Hennessy was because they told him they wouldn’t be sellin his fruity ass clothes earlier in the day….. he wasn’t happy and turned to the bottle to comfort himself…. Shit Bol we solved it!

  • Juke

    What the fuck?????

    XXL blogs are so futile it’s funny. There’s no way anyone takes this mag seriously I mean y’all only post like 6 songs a day.

    If people actually get pad to work for these blogs that’s gotta be the dumbest shit I’ve ever heard.