The chutzpah of these Jews, I swear

The Awl, a site run by some of the fruits who used to work for Gawker, runs a lot of suspect hip-hop journalism, usually of the pretending to like LCD rap for irony purposes variety, but a post yesterday, on anti-semitism hip-hop, might be the most suspect of them all.

You can tell it’s BS, because of the random nature of the reference points. The guy who wrote it claims that the first time he was offended by hip-hop was the line in “Baby Got Back” that goes, “Turn around. Stick it out. Even white boys got to shout,” and the second time he was offended by hip-hop was the time in Dave Chappelle’s block party when dead prez changed a line in “Hip-Hop” about police to read, “And it won’t stop until we get them crackers off our block,” – two events that took place something like 15 years apart. Even I was offended by hip-hop more than twice in that time span, and I wrote that shit the other day about Lil B stroking it to pr0n with other guys in the room.

Let me guess – the only time this guy spent a significant amount of time listening to rap music was when “Baby Got Back” was popular, when he was in college, possibly at parties where people pretended to be black, for the lulz, and then several years later, when they’d play rap music on Chappelle’s Show, which he found hilarious, especially the part where Chappelle went, “I’m Rick James, bitch!” But then he went to see the Dave Chappelle movie, and he got weirded out by the line in the dead prez song, especially because there were a lot of black people in the theater, even though the Roots were involved.

(Admittedly, I’ve been known to get weirded out in theaters with a lot of black people. A few months ago, I went to see the godawful Shutter Island, and it was like a fucking zoo. People shouting at the screen and shit. The old black people sitting next to me came in there with a motherfucking picnic basket, but in one of those huge, gaudy purses black women carry. I started to get up and sit somewhere, but I thought maybe she’d at least have the decency to offer me a sandwich.)

The first example of anti-semitism in hip-hop in the post is the line in the Clipse’ “Wamp Wamp” about how their pancake mix cools to a tight wad (like a Jew), which suggests to me that the guy heard someone on The Awl talking up the Clipse, as is their wont, he DLd, had a look, heard the line about the Pyrex being Jewish, and decided to put hip-hop on notice about its anti-semitism, as if anti-semitism in hip-hop is something anyone should give a shit about, even if it were true. (I’m tempted to revisit the lesson from the first season of the Real World about why black people can’t be racist, but I already had to go in once this week, re: the infamous Slap Heard ‘Round the World.)

Per the New York Times’ rule on what constitutes a proper trend piece, the other two examples he comes up with are a line from Ghostface’s Ironman that I didn’t even know existed, despite how many times I listened to that album back when I was like 15, and despite my penchant for baiting Jews on the Internets (you’d think that line would have popped out to me), as opposed to the much more famous reference to the Jews, on the superior Supreme Clientele, and a few scattered references to Jews from Jay-Z’s oeuvre. The latter doesn’t really count, because not only is Jay-Z arguably the most famous rapper evar (the king of the world or some shit, according to Rolling Stone magazine), but he’s got like 13 albums. You can probably find a reference to anything you want, somewhere in Jay’s vast body of work, similar to how it’s so easy to find a passage in the bible to back up your argument, regardless of what you’re trying to argue.

I’m assuming that’s why he gets on Jay-Z worse than anyone else: It’s one thing if you only mentioned Jews once during the course of your 10 or 15 year career (he really does seem concerned whenever a rapper so much as mentions a Jew), at least as far as this clown is aware of, but Jay-Z has done it at least three times – four, if you count him mispronouncing l’chaim in “Roc Boys,” which he apparently is, since it isn’t clear to him why it was necessary in the first place. If Jay-Z feels like he can mention Judaism in his raps all willy nilly, without consequences and repercussions, the rest of these dreaded n-words might take that as a green light to make songs about how Hitler had the right idea, he was just an underachiever, which he’s sure they would, if rappers didn’t spend so much time sitting around in the studio worrying about how their words will be received. It’s only a matter of time before Swizz Beatz loops up that Bill Hicks line from “I’m Sorry Folks.”

The worst parts are the parts where he seems to suggest that Jay-Z should be happy that Jews built Def Jam Records (which, admittedly, they did), so he’d have a platform from which to spew his anti-semitism in the first place, and the part where he seems to wish that the RIAA had a policy on going over rap albums with a fine-tooth comb for any potential perceived (by the most paranoid of Jews) anti-semitism, which would presumably be done away with, like Mos Def’s “The Rape Over.” (How did he miss that one? It’s the very origin of the term tall Israeli.)

And I quote:

Aside from [the Professor Griff interview in the Moonie newspaper], hip-hop and Jews have enjoyed a mostly fruitful history together. Rick Rubin, The Beastie Boys, and Lyor Cohen all helped build the Def Jam label into the conglomerate it became, paving the way for Jay-Z to reach the stratospheric heights he found there later on.
[...]
Lest we forget, a time once was where blatant, mean-spirited verbal assaults were openly expressed toward Jews on the grab-him-by-the-horns level that Borat was lampooning. Now the charge of stinginess with money seems to be the sole remaining stereotype of Jews deemed acceptable by RIAA standards.

Hmm…

And then he concludes by resigning himself to the fact that complaining about anti-semitism in hip-hop would be bad form, when rappers are way harder on teh ghey people and women. “What more can you expect, from those people?” he seems to be saying.

  • Oh Snap Guess What I Saw!

    This post is pure fire.

    Best line: “especially because there were a lot of black people in the theater, even though the Roots were involved.” Holy shit that’s hilarious. And true: is there a black Roots fan beyond Chuck D and their families?

  • http://www.hiphopisread.com/ Ivan

    LMAO at “even though the Roots were involved.”

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  • Rofflecaust

    If he truly listened to Hip Hop, he would have brought up Method Man’s line from “Got My Mind Made Up” (2Pac):

    “Stickin’ up Jews like German Nazis”

    *Even though it was edited out, but still…That album sold like 10 Millions Copies (Really more like 5 Million).

    -By the Way, If anybody has the original version with Inspectah Deck’s verse, post that shit ASAP. Thanks in advance!

    • what

      The line is:

      “Fuck you losers
      While you fake jacks, I make maneuvers
      Like Hitler, stickin’ up Jews with German Lugers”

      Sorry to be pedantic.

      • Rofflecaust

        LOL, Yeah that’s it! Haven’t heard it in a while…

  • DNIRO

    Beatnuts had a ill line back in the day
    “Torturing crews like Jews in gas chambers

  • Devi Gargon

    First, I am black and I and my friends are Roots Fans!

    Second, Ive probable heard every rhyme Jay Z spat, and what is so anti semite about “l’chiam”. Its actually like a shout out! These dudes are just on a mission! And Id figure that anglo-white people should be mad about the crackaz line in Block Party. And I remember, they made a point of accentuating it!

    1,000,000

  • hate

    “not only is Jay-Z arguably the most famous rapper evar (the king of the world or some shit, according to Rolling Stone magazine), but he’s got like 13 albums. You can probably find a reference to anything you want, somewhere in Jay’s vast body of work, similar to how it’s so easy to find a passage in the bible to back up your argument, regardless of what you’re trying to argue.”

    well said.

    and co-sign ROFFLECAUST . if anybody got that original track post a link

  • Young Mo Fo

    That movie was the shit…Shutter Island..

  • dat k00n nigga

    ‘Shutter Island is a 2010 American psychological thriller film directed by Martin Scorsese”

    got this from wikipedia

    I cant see a bunch of coons sitting still for a “psychological thriller”

    These jigz in the theater musta seen “Martin Scorsese” and though it was a whop mob movie

    Also you know coons cant stay in one place and act civil.

    Where is The fun in that

    • og bobby j

      on the real, shutter island was fire. if you can pay attention for 2.5 hours….

      im bout to head out the lou for the weekend….any good food spots out there?

  • vcity

    The paragraph describing Bol’s movie going experience should be enough to get a book deal.

  • geico lizard

    “I started to get up and sit somewhere, but I thought maybe she’d at least have the decency to offer me a sandwich.”
    ^^^
    ROFFLEGOLDSTEIN BOL DAMN I CAN PICTURE THAT TOO. I dont know about generosity with food from black people in public because I have never been offered any food but white people i sit next to at titans games always offer to buy beer and food for me and my friends. Pride should stop us black men from taking handouts from whites but when it comes to sex and free food most men will say yes,rofflesteinberg.


    Jews make most of the money off those black rappers thats why they arent complaining.

  • glassjaw

    for all the holacaust movies/books/memorials/industry these jews better realise that we will call them on their bullshit. Jesse Jackson gets it, Obama gets it, Bush got it and a motherfucking Goldberg will get it(wether it’s a whoopi or a Rabbi). How can you be an oppressor of an entire region and still have the superiority to whine about a fucking line in a rap song that only gets played at BBQ’s by 30 year old black guys who don’t vote and 30 year old jewish guys lamenting their conscriptions in palestine. GTFOH.

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  • wednesdayguy

    Lol Bol ur hilarious. How have you not written a book? although i think you should get a stand in to do the author pic at the back because you do overly resemble a effeminate cat.

  • icon (trillbert arenas)

    LMAO @ you should get a stand in to do the author pic at the back because you do overly resemble a effeminate cat.

    Ol Cheshire cat lookin’ ass nigga…

  • Brooklyn

    i never got down with the victim role played by jews. don’t get me wrong, the holocaust was fucked up, but 3 million deaths in 12 years can’t compare to the 12 + million of africans that died on the middle passage alone, many brought over here on ships that were owned by jews. as much money as jewish people have made off our music and culture, sitting down combing through rap music for a few anti-semitic lines is ridiculous. blacks don’t even own rap music, jews do, they get paid for whatever a nigga raps about.

    • L

      i never got down with the victim role played by jews. don’t get me wrong, the holocaust was fucked up, but 3 million deaths in 12 years can’t compare to the 12 + million of africans that died on the middle passage alone, many brought over here on ships that were owned by jews.

      More like 12mil killed in the Holocaust in 7 years (4696/day) and 2mil killed in the Atlantic slave trade over 300 years (18/day). If you’re measuring fuckeduppedness by rate of death, then I swear I read a paper that claimed the genocide in Cambodia takes the prize, but Wikipedia’s numbers don’t match up. The Rwandan genocide (8000/day) is probably the leader, and they did it mostly with machetes so they get an A for effort.

      • Brooklyn

        only about 3-6 million jews died during the holocaust, the other 6-9 million were gypsies, mentally retarded, physically handicapped, and other peoples that the nazis didn’t feel were worthy to live. and you mean to tell me that out of all the nations that participated in the slave trade from the 1450′s until the 1850′s: england, france, the u.s., spain, portugal, denmark, and the netherlands, only 18 slaves died a day? slave ships were stocked with upwards of a hundred slaves because only a quarter actually survived the trip to america. like i said, the holocaust was fucked up, but the african slave trade’s ramifications have been a little more far reaching.

      • Brass Tacks

        The Rwandan genocide (8000/day) is probably the leader, and they did it mostly with machetes so they get an A for effort.

        That was funny…

  • big pinch

    No mention of Jada’s “stack chips like hebrews” line gettin blocked out of all about the benjamins???

  • Bomb

    I was gonna stamp this article kosher. Except for the paranoid Jews line. That was a little overboard. Bad form to be accusing another group of people of paranoia. Especially when they have a huge reason to be “paranoid”. Like dudes in white hoods, shaved heads, or towelheads (or any other variety of racist headgear i forgot) publicly mocking their dead family members and talking about giving it a second shot. I wouldn’t mock a shvatza for being paranoid and oversensitive about race, well i probably would, but it’s still wrong.

    Yeah the antisemitism in hip hop thing was horrible and stupid.

    The important thing is that the KKK is smiling right now, black vs Jew beef brings tears of joy to their eyes. White people outsourcing their racism is a great testament to capitalism.

  • Ron Lee

    BLACKS DISRESPECTING JEWS: The clipse saying their “pyrex is jewish”

    JEWS DISRESPECTING BLACKS: “uuuh, didn’t you see the small writing on page 20 of your contract, all your publishing belongs to us and we’ll continue to make $ off your music for the rest of our lives”

    Joe, i find you and everyone who looks like you offensive. You jews have a shitload of nerve to be talking about how you’re disrespected in hip hop when you fucks have been RAPING AND PILLAGING this culture FOR YEARS!

    The jews are the ones who funded all the projects you mentioned you idiot, doesn’t seem like they were very offended when they were collecting those checks, right?

  • ron lee is a moron

    JEWS DISRESPECTING BLACKS: “uuuh, didn’t you see the small writing on page 20 of your contract, all your publishing belongs to us and we’ll continue to make $ off your music for the rest of our lives”

    ———————

    so i guess black people don’t hire entertainment lawyers or any legal counsel? that quote should have the header “Rappers Are Morons”.

    it makes no sense to me that jews are demonized for business acumen and financial success. as a minority group, jews are extremely successful despite being such a small percentage of the population on top of being hated by too many ethnic and religious groups to list.