Marky Mark > Kid Cudi – Put Your Shirt Back On, Homie

Before I even start this little rant, let me start with a preemptive PAUSE! This admittedly may traverse some pause-worthy moments, but it has to be said.

So I was perusing the Internet earlier today and came across news that Kid Cudi—whose music I love by the way—is the new poster boy for Calvin Klein. That’s a good look, I thought to myself. I could totally see him rockin’ some CK gear, but to my surprise, the Cleveland native wasn’t sportin’ khakis and polo shirts—he was shirtless and modeling underwear.


I’m not mad at any man making bread, especially in a recession, but the thought of Cudi’s chest hair taco meat plastered on 50 foot billboards in Times Square or even the pages of this site’s magazine is not my idea of a good time. I’m more into the idea of Nicki Minaj as a Victoria’s Secret model, as I’m sure all of you are, too.

I mean, seriously; how did this whole deal come about? I know Cudi is making mainstream waves with his HBO series, How to Make it in America, and is fast becoming a marketable commodity, but “underwear model” wouldn’t be part of my career goals, especially when my pecs weren’t up to par with the last two rappers to do it.

Nelly made ladies drool and men hit the gym, when pics of his shirtless ad for Sean John popped up last year (PAUSE) but the originator of the rapper-turned-actor-turned-CK-model was Marky Mark, known now as Mark Wahlberg.

Not that I’m in any rush to see more rappers running around in their boxer briefs (the offer still stands for Nicki, though) but c’mon, son! I’m sure chicks were way more excited to see Mark’s “funky bunch” than they were to see Cudi’s birdcage.

In fact, I could think of several rappers I’d like to see topless and sorry, Kid Cudi ain’t nowhere near the top or bottom of that list. But, uhm, Nicki, the offer still stands—I’ll even do the shoot myself. —Anslem Samuel

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  • John Cochran

    I don’t think an adult completely comfortable with thier sexuality needs to use pause. That being said, if anyone, male or female, gets on any type of publication exposing their bodies they need to get in shape. If he was a friend of mine or from my hood he would never live this gay looking mess down.

  • abdulnasir

    if he was still here, i’m sure ron mexico would’ve ran on this on Negro Please!

  • Pingback: #EpicFail: Kid Cudi Channels Marky Mark and Pookie From "New Jack City" In New Calvin Klein Ad! | Gyant Unplugged

  • $yk!

    Looks more like a Red Cross “Feed The Hungry” campaign than a Calvin ad.

    Kid Cudi – Put Your Shirt Back On, Homie

    I wonder if they called Ross…

  • dj

    I WISH NIGGAZ WOULD STOP SAYING PAUSE AND NO HOMO!!! Real men don’t have to give a disclaimer when they make a statement, only these new age fags. Double kill yo self if you over 30 and still saying that shit!

    • yoprince

      it’s not that you ‘have’ to… it’s just funny sometimes.

      my associate the other day: “I’ve been juggling a lot of balls lately.”

      Then he chuckled to himself and said: “Not those kind of balls, mind you.” And we both laughed.

      He’s like 60+, but the younger, hip-hop version of that is “pause,” “no homo.”

      • NotoriousAGC

        dont give a fuck if your boss does it, sayin PAUSE is fucking GAY..Kid Cudi put your shirt back on homie XD

  • chillin mayne

    i dont think his body has fully developed yet, he has a head to large for his “body”

  • sealsaa

    *In Riley Freeman voice* XXL, yall nigga’s are gay.

  • EmCDL

    OMLL (oh my lawdy-lawd), please XXL, do not post anything of this nature again…please…*washes eyes out with hot water*

  • HvdL

    let him shine.. this is for the skinny people around us.. not all are big boned … @ CK they thought this would be a great deal for those who are not that FAT !!.

    Well, i’m not from the states soo.. What Up .. Amsterdam Holland !!

  • DV8

    did Vanessa force you to do this topic for a blog?

    SMH WTF Ness?????

  • Fireforreal

    Kid cudi makes soulja boy look like 50 cent. LIL guy put a shirt….No a sweatshirt on and work on making a good album Not that bullshit you through together just to say it’s over niggas heads. Wack is wack fuck it.

  • Will E. Will

    got dayum Kid Cudi two words for you.

    Weight Resistance lmaooo

  • BAR

    This dude knocked somebody out at a concert?!?

  • lvs

    obiviously kudi is comfortable with what he looks like. so why ya’ll trippin lol! he’s not killin nobody

    • NotoriousAGC

      cept our eyes.

  • Brahsef

    It’s a CK ad, what’d you think he’d be doing? They’ve been doin the same style of advertising since the 80s. Cudi is obviously gettin bread for this, and fuck it…I’d be geeked to have myself on a CK ad in Times Square.

    And times are changin, that roided out look is played out now. Skeets are all about that “art” look now. At least white skeets.

  • I KNOW YOU!!


  • tommy gunz

    cudi just hit puberty

    give him a break guys

  • the brown

    Yo! Yeah he actually doesnt look that bad. I see muscle tone. He aint bulkin but he doesnt have to. He aint fat either, he actually looks like a boxer. He ain’t fly but I aint mad at it. Pisses me off that some sexually confused “writer” with a pretty good gig has to nothin better to do than try and justify why he was staring at this pic a little tooooooo long.

  • these posts are racist

    I love how this guy keeps dropping Nicki Manaj to add to his “PAUSE”. PAUSE doesn’t work when you’re doing an article about men’s underwear models…comparing which male model looks better. Just write the article unapologectically and leave the no homo and pause to those who have insecure sexualities.

  • Smear

    u r gay. seriously.

  • Otto the Rugged Man

    IMO, I think it’s cool that ads are showing a different image of males. I’m a thin, kinda unfit, dude myself and I felt insecure about it during my adolescent years, because ads made it seem like it was “ugly”.

    The size of your arms and six pack doesn’t make you a male. What makes you a male is what’s between your legs. And CK is marketing for us dudes who look like a “Kid Cudi”. I’m thinking of buying some CK underwear now.

    Anyway, it’s the confidence that matters, not the looks. Well sometimes the money too, but I don’t usually spend dough on hoes…

    And I lose respect for rappers anyway when they use sex appeal to sell, i.e. 50 Cent, Game, Nelly, Wayne, etc.

    So props to CK and Cudi for doing this. Hopefully this sets a new trend for ads. Because honestly, people (especially girls, but males too) think they gotta fit this “image” of someone else, when someone else is someone else. You are you. And that’s real talk!

  • P81

    @bar…no he didnt “knock” anyone “out”. He swung a faggy right hook and clipped the guy.

    im with syk looks like a feed the hunger campaign to me.

  • caino

    We now have herion chic for male models!

  • G-Money

    this dude looks like a starving insurgent in the mountains of Afghanistan. he shoulda had the objectivity to stop himself and say “no, im not in shape for this” and “i look like a complete dumbass” after he saw the shoot.

  • ladidadida

    this mofo’s head and neck are as big as his torso

  • wiLLie BooM

    Kid Cudi ain’T the one who’s gay…U guys are, for being an hassle because the guy ain’t beef like Fitty. If u guys would like him to be all muscle up and shit and hatin because he’s not well you’re the one who’s gay. How many of you are beef as Fitty Nelly or some ohter dude..??? Don’t think that much.. and how many of you would refuse the chance to get big money from CK for posing even though u skinny..? don’t think that much either. Yeah He’s slim…and still makin money out of posing.. Anslem Samuel is gay and all u guys hatin too. If u want only beef and bulk models to take off their shirt well go get a Gay p magazine or go peep Go Go boys…They’ll make you haters happy!!

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  • diane

    people don’t need to look a certain way just so your eyes could have something to drool over…its like we’ve been brainwashed to think what should be on a billboard and what shouldn’t…just the world run its course and let cudi do his thing.he ain’t killing anyone.

  • Humphrey

    I would totally bang kid cudi!!!

  • Riley

    Why is this man so concerned whether Cudi has six pack abs or not….if you do not like Cudi shirtless don’t look at Cudi Shirtless..I’m thinking your straight but Im not sure with a whole post dedicated to you telling Cudi shouldn’t be the an underwear model because he is skinny. What does Nicki really have to do with anything but try to re-assure the reader that you like women but in turn making your sexuality seem insecure. If Cudi is Calvin Klein Model what does Nicki being a Victoria’s Secret Model have to do with anything ? LMFAO “I’m sure chicks were way more excited to see Mark’s “funky bunch” than they were to see Cudi’s birdcage.” Are you a women? Lol Why are you so “sure” they would wanna see Marky Mark then Kid Cudi…..You should really look into your sexuality man…..cause that post want completely straight…..

  • Bob Loblaw (Mwaha)

    Narrator: [voice over] I felt
    sorry for the
    guys packing into gyms, trying to look like Calvin Klein and Tommy
    Hilfiger said they should.

    Narrator: [indicating to the ad]
    Is that how
    a man looks like?

    [Tyler looks at the ad
    and laughs]

    Tyler: Ahh,
    self-improvement is
    masturbation. And self-destruction…