Will Kanye marry Amber Rose?

If Kanye didn’t want us to think he was considering marrying Amber Rose, he would have said something by now, right?

He’s been more prolific than usual lately over at his blog/scam travel site. I know there was a post in which he congratulated himself for the College Dropout having been named the best rap album of the aughts (or something to that effect) by Entertainment Weekly, as if anyone gives a shit about Entertainment Weekly’s opinion on rap music, and I think there may have been a few other recent posts along those lines. It’s hard to say. I haven’t been there in years. I only hear about this shit second hand. On the rare occasion when Kanye updates his blog himself, like that time he ruined Bonnaroo, the crack team of mail sorters/hip-hop experts at MTV News usually quotes it at length within the hour.

Are we still supposed to be pretending that Kanye does all of the updates on his blog, or was that more or less settled back when he got caught posting pictures of the latest in teh ghey men’s fashion while en route to Hawaii, that time he pulled a Chris Brown on a stalkerazzi? It was obvious even then that the only ones Kanye wrote were then ones with the all caps and the piss poor writing, but that was the first time there was actual proof. I wonder if, since then, they’ve given up on maintaining the illusion. Like, if they let the team of teh ghey kids go ahead and update while Kanye was having his incident at this year’s VMAs.

Come to think of it, another recent post by Kanye may have had to do with that Spike Jonze video where he gets Feather Indian drunk, causes a scene at a party, date-rapes a broad, then kills himself, or whatever happened in that video. I can’t remember if I actually saw that video, or if I wrote an entire post on it just based on a description of it I read on another site. But I do seem to recall seeing, on Twitter or somewhere, where Kanye had congratulated Pitchfork for having the vision to select “We Were Once a Fairy Tale” as one of the top music videos of 2009, even though he had it pulled from the Internets, and I don’t seem to recall him having re-released it.

The only reason why Kanye might be hesitant to comment on whether or not he plans to marry Amber Rose is that it would be weird to have your girlfriend read in the paper or somewhere that you don’t have any intention on marrying her. Even if she’s a sex worker by trade. I know, from having seen the film the Wrestler – which has more of a verite feel, and really, like the Wire, should viewed be more along the lines of journalism – that strippers like to put up a strict wall of church and state between themselves and their patrons, but that’s probably just to avoid handing out too many freebies. They still harbor illusions of living a square life with a man. It’s just hardwired into a woman’s psyche. No amount of crystal meth can change that. That’s why Marisa Tomei finally got down off of the pole and tried to get with Mickey Rourke, at the end of the movie. But, alas, it was already too late.

And who knows, maybe Kanye really is planning on marrying Amber Rose. The report I read in some British paper last week included a quote from an anonymous source, probably one of the teh ghey guys Kanye travels with, that made it clear to me some of the psychological issues at play here. Namely, the fact that Kanye might be looking for a strong female figure in his life to replace his mother, with whom he had a weird oedipal relationship that may have actually led to her death. I’ve alluded to this on a number of occasions. However, I hadn’t been aware of the role Kanye’s mother may have played in the relationship with his fiance. What this guy was saying, which I hadn’t been aware of, is that Kanye’s mother loved that black chick he was gonna marry, and that’s probably why he was gonna marry her in the first place. But when Kanye’s mother died, in a tragic plastic surgery accident, that freed him up to get what he wanted all along – a white woman, albeit a white woman with a ridonkulous and a haircut like a guy. Whether Kanye purposely dropped his fiance as soon as he no longer felt obligated to marry her, or if this played out on more of a subconscious level is hard to say. I might have to finally listen to 808s & Heartbreak. Or maybe I’ll just scan a description of it on the Internets for clues.

Will Kanye marry Amber Rose?

If Kanye didn’t want us to think he was considering marrying Amber Rose, he would have said something by now, right?

He’s been more prolific than usual lately over at his blog/scam travel site. I know there was a post in which he congratulated himself for the College Dropout having been named the best rap album of the aughts (or something to that effect) by Entertainment Weekly, as if anyone gives a shit about Entertainment Weekly’s opinion on rap music, and I think there may have been a few other recent posts along those lines. It’s hard to say. I haven’t been there in years. I only hear about this shit second hand. On the rare occasion when Kanye updates his blog himself, like that time he ruined Bonnaroo, the crack team of mail sorters/hip-hop experts at MTV News usually quotes it at length within the hour.

Are we still supposed to be pretending that Kanye does all of the updates on his blog, or was that more or less settled back when he got caught posting pictures of the latest in teh ghey men’s fashion while en route to Hawaii, that time he pulled a Chris Brown on a stalkerazzi? It was obvious even then that the only ones Kanye wrote were then ones with the all caps and the piss poor writing, but that was the first time there was actual proof. I wonder if, since then, they’ve given up on maintaining the illusion. Like, if they let the team of teh ghey guys go ahead and update while Kanye was having his incident at this year’s VMAs.

Come to think of it, another recent post by Kanye may have had to do with that Spike Jonze video where he gets Feather Indian drunk, causes a scene at a party, date-rapes a broad, then kills himself – or whatever happened in that video. I can’t remember if I actually saw it, or if I wrote an entire post on it just based on a description of it I read on another site. But I do seem to recall seeing, on Twitter or somewhere, where Kanye had congratulated Pitchfork for having the vision to select “We Were Once a Fairy Tale” as one of the top music videos of 2009, even though he had it pulled from the Internets, and I don’t seem to recall him re-releasing it.

The only reason why Kanye might be hesitant to comment on whether or not he plans to marry Amber Rose is that it would be weird to have your girlfriend read in the paper or somewhere that you don’t have any intention on marrying her. Even if she’s a sex worker by trade. I know, from having seen the film the Wrestler – which has more of a verite feel, and really, like the Wire, should viewed be more along the lines of journalism – that strippers like to put up a strict wall of church and state between themselves and their patrons, but that’s probably just to avoid handing out too many freebies. They still harbor illusions of living a square life with a man. It’s just hardwired into a woman’s psyche. No amount of crystal meth can change that. That’s why Marisa Tomei finally got down off of the pole and tried to get with Mickey Rourke, at the end of the movie. But, alas, it was already too late.

And who knows, maybe Kanye really is planning on marrying Amber Rose. The report I read in some British paper last week included a quote from an anonymous source, probably one of the teh ghey guys Kanye travels with, that made it clear to me some of the psychological issues at play here. Namely, the fact that Kanye might be looking for a strong female figure in his life to replace his mother, with whom he had a weird oedipal relationship that may have actually led to her death. I’ve alluded to this on a number of occasions. However, I hadn’t been aware of the role Kanye’s mother may have played in the relationship with his fiance. What this guy was saying, which I hadn’t been aware of, is that Kanye’s mother loved that black chick he was gonna marry, and that’s probably why he was gonna marry her in the first place. But when Kanye’s mother died, in a tragic plastic surgery accident, that freed him up to get what he wanted all along – a white woman, albeit a white woman with a ridonkulous and a haircut like a guy.Whether Kanye purposely dropped his fiance as soon as he no longer felt obligated to marry her, or if this played out on more of a subconscious level is hard to say. I might have to finally listen to 808s & Heartbreak. Or maybe I’ll just scan a description of it on the Internets for clues.

  • Worley

    He’s good so long as he gets an iron clad pre-nup and/or does not make the marital home in California. Ask Nas. Better yet, ask Lamar in a bout six months.

  • http://www.plasticsquirtguns.blogspot.com thoreauly77

    missed opportunity to discuss the death of brittany murphy.

    • $ykotic/Don McCaine

      Knowing Bol he probably did already.

      • http://www.jamal7mile.blogspot.com Jamal7Mile

        Hahaa! You can’t say he didn’t either! Man, I missed the last two (three??) post that were pulled last week because of work. So much for FireShot…

        • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

          Chris Henry’s death had “Bol” written all over it.

        • http://www.plasticsquirtguns.blogspot.com thoreauly77

          J7M-

          i am sure one of the nerds around here saved the posts.

  • b

    mailed that one in huh?

  • General

    This is probably something cooked up by his publicist to try to get him some publicity that is positive after the fiasco this fall…

  • Deadly MIME

    Kanye ain’t gettin married. Not to no Amber Rose. I’ll do a quick fuck and leave real quick

  • DetroitDraper

    I wonder will this get pulled?…

    MAYN HOL’UP

  • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

    Assuming Kanye does want to marry & have children, his best bet would be to pull a Hugh Jackman. Find an average, non-celebrity that is more than happy being the wife of a superstar. His temperment is too intense to be married to someone who may get as much attention as himself. He seems the type to need an Ugly Betty, who’ll treat him as the (Martin Louis the) king (Jr) he thinks he is, which actually, doesn’t seem like that bad of an idea.

    That would surely one-up the Taylor Swift debacle.

  • JAY STONE

    stop gossiping and leave that shit to bossip.
    i thought this is a hiphop site.wtf?

  • http://www.xxlmag.com/?p=66092 jay

    whats funny is didnt kayne write a song called gold digger?? lol need to listen to ur own words dude.. she prob already sucked off half the rap industry

    • Broke Iz A Disease

      He did Gold digger AND made this chick a Overnight celebrity

      • Hanch

        LMAO thats hilarious!!

  • Sky Holiday

    Damn Bol, that was lousy. Put down the yellow tail, this is like the 6th mediocre post in a row. Keep this up, well send your ass over to KeepitTrill

  • the best ever

    My middle-class, white mother lives by entertaintment weekly.

  • cabo verde

    Amber Rose is not White. She is from Cape Verede. Her mother is Black African and father Italian.

  • Jim

    I have 1 question, who gives a fuck?

  • Chuck

    Byron Crawford you are a complete moron. Gheys wow. Glad you are living in 2010 homophobe. You have the brain of an ant, I cannot believe any respectably publication would hire such an idiot. Kanye did release the video on iTunes. 808s & Heartbreak was possibly the best release of 2008. Your minute brain could not grasp a single concept of the We Were Once A Fairytale video. Kanye has a perfectly normal relationship with his Father. You know nothing of the subject you are writing about. You are a terrible writer yourself. He loved Alexis very much, obviously dedicating an entire album to their demise would make that pretty obvious. You are pathetic.