A History of Violence

I guess Kid Cudi isn’t done addressing the criticism he took over his Canadian bitch nigga moment. I would blame Kanye West’s influence, but I know the Cudi type all too well. He exhibits the same dangerous combination of Eastern European dictator megalomania and Ralph Tresvant sensitivity that have already consumed West, Lupe Fiasco and a slew of other artists whose unparalleled awesomeness keep us all awake at night.

The highlight of Cudi’s latest rant is that he insists the media and other rappers are out to destroy him, namely by portraying him as the poster child for violence. Now had Cudi felt he was being presented as the poster child for bitchassness, I’d have to agree. I would have been like, “Yes, Cudi. They definitely portray you in that light… when they show your actual and frequent displays of bitchassness.”

[Blogger’s Note: Remember Postaboy? Whatever happened to that fellow?]

How the fuck could a nigga be the poster child for violence when all we’ve seen is a single sissyslap at one of his sissified shows? That’s like Lil Wayne being the poster child for safe sex. Nigga’s probably only done it like once—and poorly, I’m sure. He must put condoms on his dreads like Jamaicans do. So long as you’re wearing it somewhere, right? But, I digress. Cudi plays to rooms filled with bitches—male and female alike—whom he knows he can assault with banter, whining and the occasional errant left hand.

That’s not to say everyone attending a Kid Cudi show is a whiny bitch. It’s just… well… you know what? I’ve yet to know someone who has purposely attended a Kid Cudi show who wasn’t a whiny bitch, so nevermind. I’ll pocket that one. The important people with the money say I should exercise more caution when I speak. There you go. Caution.

I thought people come to these shows to hear Cudi whine about being high and lonely over beats and shit. I guess they’re okay with a speech too, because this nigga is gettin all kinds of Obama love up there. The excitement in the crowd amazes me. He could have been reading the phone book. They would have cheered.

Despite the maniacal fans who will only let him see his mirror when it’s time to do a line, I don’t think anyone could possibly think about Mr. Solo Dolo as much as… well, Mr. Solo Dolo. There’s no concentrated effort by negro media to bring Cudi down. If there is, I surely haven’t gotten that behind the scenes email or press release. Granted, if I had I wouldn’t discuss it either. I am a professional, after all. But, no. Sorry. I’m not buying this “everyone’s against me” bullshit. Save that for the empty emo emu who need that sort of thing to feel alive.

People only write about Cudi for two reasons—well, three if you count that HBO show. Cudi makes music. Cudi makes ridiculous statements. I, like everyone else on the planet, assume that the Vancouver—er, umm—assault incident is an isolated one. If it’s not, then Cudi either gets his ass beat on the regular, or should have been a bookie. If that man gets into regular physical altercations, his true talent in life is picking spots and making odds.

My pops would take that nigga to Yonkers Raceway and bet the mortgage on “di numba tree ‘arse!”

In addition to promoting anarchy, Cudi claims he only got into the “game” to smoke his weed. At least he’s accomplished one of his goals. He must have smoked the entire Nick at Nite/TV Land rotation in one Dutch Master to come up with this shit right here, nigga.

[Blogger’s Note: This music shit is far from a game. It’s also nothing like selling drugs, despite the popular metaphor.]

Mr. Mescudi, this is my most sincere of season’s greetings to you. In order to avoid further embarrassment, I would like you to do a few things. Enjoy your new year. Make your little TV show. Quietly collect your non-Gaga tour money. Simma yuh poom poom.

Questions? Comments? Requests? Been posterized lately? ron@ronmexicocity.com

  • http://Pierzy11@gmail.com Pierzy

    “That’s like Lil Wayne being the poster child for safe sex. Nigga’s probably only done it like once—and poorly, I’m sure. He must put condoms on his dreads like Jamaicans do.”

    HAHAHAHAHA

    Maybe on his glasses like Left Eye in the early days of TLC?

    ————-
    As far as CuDi, I don’t know about anyone else, but if someone wants the public to have a different opinion of him, the main point that he should make is that he just wants to smoke his weed. That will surely prove to everyone – especially the media – how intelligent and well-versed you are!

  • $ykotic/Don McCaine

    Ain’t it a blip that both of Kanye’s boys are emotional wrecks?

    Anyway Mexx Teddy Riley deserves your input…(II)

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      yooooooooooooooo.

      we spoke about that on the podcast today… but, definitely. i got you on teddy riley tomorrow.

      • HNIC

        Aw, man, I can’t wait to check out that Teddy Riley story, tomorrow. I know that it’s gonna be epic. I’m getting my jokes together, as we speak… er, um… type.

        • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

          @HNIC

          Lol. Let’s get this one out of the way now:

          “That nigga Teddy Jam’d her up something terrible. Too bad he had to New Jack Swing on his own kid…”

        • http://dasteamwerkmusik.blogspot.com bollocks

          HAHAHAHA! Classic. Obvious, but classic.

        • HNIC

          @Grands. What up, homie!

          Who knows? Perhaps Teddy Riley’s reasoning behind “Joe Jackson-ing” his daughter was to have her aspire to reach the same level of Pop Superstardom as the late, great M.J.

          If you’ve ever seen the VH-1 “Jackson” bio-pic, do you remember the scene when Poppa Joe came home and noticed that one of his guitar strings was broken? He was like; “Who’s been messing with what’s mines?” and all of the kids started crying. They knew that he was about to levy a serious ass-whoppin’ into poor, chubby, pre-ass whoopin’-jovial Tito.

      • $ykotic/Don McCaine

        @ Mexx

        Too much static in the podcast. I’ll wait.

  • http://twitter tgriff

    I swear I thought by the title this would be a Mary J. Blige post. Any way another great post by bruh.

  • http://Pierzy11@gmail.com Pierzy

    “That’s like Lil Wayne being the poster child for safe sex. Nigga’s probably only done it like once—and poorly, I’m sure. He must put condoms on his dreads like Jamaicans do.”

    HAHAHAHAHA

    Maybe on his glasses like Left Eye in the early days of TLC?

    ——————–
    As far as CuDi, I don’t know about anyone else, but if someone wants the public to have a different opinion of him, the main point that he should make is that he just wants to smoke his weed. That will surely prove to everyone – especially the media – how intelligent and well-versed you are!

  • DV8

    “In addition to promoting anarchy, Cudi claims he only got into the “game” to smoke his weed.”

    If that was his purpose then he could have spared us the depressing music he makes. That shit would ruin my high if I still blazed. But do we blame Cudi or Kanye? After all Mr. West is the one who signed him.

  • Moving Sideways

    Cudi been puffin’ that Infomercial, you know the SlapChop. You get so chopped you slap a motherfucker.

    RIP Billy Mays

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      that slapchop. we have a winner.

      you’re gonna love my nuts.

      the shamwow dude is ill. didn’t he choke out a hooker?

      • Moving Sideways

        Vince Offer is his name and slapchoppin’ hoe’s is his game.

        http://tinyurl.com/ylqzsue

        Check this out, you can thank me later.

      • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

        ^^Indeed. She needed medical attention & the whole nine. White men get away with everything…

        Probably used a Shamwow to soak up her blood.

        “Here bitch,*throws it @ her feet* & watch your mouth next time.”

  • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

    Too many quotes, Mex.

    But, I’ve been saying for quite some time, emo-thuggery is on the rise, at an exponential rate.

    Man-bags can hold box cutters & drugs just as easily as plaid ascots, cashmere scarves & silk Gucci ‘kerchiefs. Somebody’s telling these ADD having douche nozzles cats that the weed is natural medicine; “FUCK THAT RIDILIN, SON!!”, & now look…dude’s running around paranoid, thinking the world’s against him, with no clear line of sight that doesn’t include that White girl. No, not the one he’s dating, the one that Raekwon wears on his clothes, until Ghostface comes through.

    The first rule in the ‘Rap Niggas Handbook’ is “Rap, nigga!”. I guess some folks just skim through it.

  • Brooklyn

    this nigga is hilarious. he overracts and gets all homotional about someone throwing a wallet at him, he bitch slaps the wrong dude, and now he’s crying about how the media is trying to turn him into the poster boy of violence? that nigga’s delusional, clearly it just isn’t maria juana that he rolls into his blunts, he must be sprinkling some a different world onto that shit too. in some issue of xxl he said that he’s the next hendrix. so far, the only thing he got in common with hendrix is being light skinned, the drugs, and the white bitches. as far as i know, hendrix didn’t trip on acid and slap some motherfucker at woodstock. apparently, cudi didn’t have someone around when he was a little boy to slap him around a little and toughen him up, because he’s not only a sensitive bitch, he’s a drug addled sensitive bitch, and those are the worse kind.

  • mikel

    as ridiculous as his statements are they still hold more weight than his music…dude is the definition of style over substance

  • El Tico Loco

    Douchebag douchebag!*that’s what they yelliin!*

    I said it before is not gonna stop at skinny jeans is deeper than that.

  • harmen

    man my respect for cudi is falling and falling, that album was sporadic you know? it was just weird, but it was aight still tho this guy’s more and more of lil bitch the further he’s progressed into his career i mean come the fuck on son! (ed lover voice) he said he wanted to retire before his album even dropped!

  • $ykotic/Don McCaine
    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      hahahahaaha. +2 points for “it ain’t… over”

  • Todd_Base

    man Cudi’s an okay artist but he first showed his signs of bitchtivity (yes I said Bitchtivity) when he was unsatisfied with how his picture was placed in the freshmen 10 of XXL magazine, talking bout “he all in the creases and shit when you open up the mag, blah blah blah” not to mention performing at a reebok event and then throwing a bitch fit cus they asked you to take off your JORDANS and supply those moon feet with their own brand, not to mention they are paying you..smfh…

  • Todd_Base

    The excitement in the crowd amazes me. He could have been reading the phone book. They would have cheered.

    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

    LMFAO simply hilarious.

    it’s crzy how rappers like cudi never get to perform at those shuckle and jive clubs, where instead of wallets, bullets and bottles are thrown, with a crowd full of dread heads…just let him perform there..then he’ll be the poster that was put on the wall from the crowd’s violence.

  • BIGNAT

    let me rewind and say it again what cudi said himself. before he was even close to having his album drop he was talking about quitting the game. he is not built for it he wants all the positive and none of the negative.

    • $ykotic/Don McCaine

      “before he was even close to having his album drop he was talking about quitting the game. he is not built for it he wants all the positive and none of the negative.”

      ^^^ This

  • http://www.obeseamerica.com sankofa

    Kanye should have an imprint for proteges called DIVAS (Distinguished In Violent Acts Son). Substitute the “violent” for “vain” and you’ve got something the middle schoolers in girl pants can tell their parents when they start worrying about their kids.

  • Apollo Moses

    That last Blogger’s Note was on point…that punch was so weak, they only thing repugnant about that incident was how fruity he looked trying to snuff a stan…Teddy Riley…SMH…waiting on this one….

  • these posts are racist

    What is it with these rappers who sound intelligent and thoughtful in their music sounding…like this, when they speak?

    Lupe, Cudi, i LOVE!…..your music.

  • http://theinfamoussyndicate.blogspot.com/ Noles506

    Priceless, nice to see when people dont kiss the ass of the next wonder boy….lol

  • Gift

    How the fuck could a nigga be the poster child for violence when all we’ve seen is a single sissyslap at one of his sissified shows? That’s like Lil Wayne being the poster child for safe sex. Nigga’s probably only done it like once—and poorly, I’m sure. He must put condoms on his dreads like Jamaicans do. So long as you’re wearing it somewhere, right?

    Ron u r a fuckin fool for this shit. keep it up. Tell Cudi to get that tampon out his ass lmfao!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!