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Moving on up

At least Soulja Boy had the sense to move his valuables to a decent neighborhood.

Yesterday, a video hit the Internets of Soulja Boy showing off his shedload of ridonkulous-looking jewelry and his shoebox full of bundles of hundred dollar bills. In it, he’s in his apartment out in LA, the same place that recently hit him with a bill for about $10,000 in unpaid rent and late fees, as well as a letter getting on him for making too much noise and using too many parking spaces.

People who follow Soulja Boy on Twitter must have been giving him shit about not being able to come up with the $10,000. Which seems silly, in the sense that $10,000 isn’t very much money at all. Either he didn’t fall very far behind on his rent, or the apartment just isn’t very expensive – he must be living in a shit hole similar to some of the places where I used to live.

But who knows, when it comes to the kind of people who would follow Soulja Boy on Twitter. They might be so broke that they just don’t have any concept of money. $10,000 might as well be $10 million. I could stop paying the mortgage on my house for a few years and not get $10,000 behind (no, really), and I’d imagine some of the kids around here would be interested in the day to day life of Soulja Boy.

The reason I suspect Soulja Boy hasn’t fallen very far behind in paying the rent is because I’ve spent enough time around cracka-ass crackas to know how they operate. I’ve lived in houses and apartments in areas where only white people live. I grew up in a neighborhood where mine was the only black family. 20 years after the fact, there’s like three of them. It’s not the most expensive place in the world, but this is St. Louis we’re talking about. It’s a broke, petty part of the country.

White people who live in places like that hate to see black people coming. They probably wouldn’t have rented Soulja Boy that apartment in the first place, except the company that owns it is probably owned by Arabs or some shit. They could give a rat’s ass if ignorant black people live in one of their units. If you can come up with the first and last, you’re in. The salty old white people who live there are a different story.

I wouldn’t be surprised if that $10,000 in back rent and late fees was only for one month. And I wouldn’t be surprised if it wasn’t even that late. Maybe a few days, or a week. If it wasn’t Soulja Boy and his ignorant-ass friends living there, they probably wouldn’t have given a shit. They definitely wouldn’t have cc’d a copy of the bill to TMZ or whatever, putting his business all out in the street. They’re just trying to come up with up with enough complaints that they can kick him out without him being able to sue or anything. Trust me, I’ve had this happen to me in a couple of different – though admittedly for good reason.

The good thing about living in a series of shitholes, like I have, is that it’s nothing to up and leave. If the toilet overflows and the ceiling starts caving in, just move into another unit. If an Indian family moves in next door and the entire building starts smelling like curry chicken, just move into the complex on the other side of the highway.

It’s different with Soulja Boy. He had himself a nice spread down in Atlanta, and you saw what happened there. Goons found out where he lived and ran up in his crib. It may have even been people from his neighborhood. Houses in Atlanta, because they’re in fucking Georgia, don’t cost as much money as houses in more cosmopolitan areas. And the place Soulja Boy was, in in that episode of Rich Nigga Shit where he was riding around the house on a Segwaym looked like it might have been a townhouse. It looked like a somewhat cleaner version of the place where I lived, where the ceiling starting falling down on my lunch.

The consensus re: this latest Soulja Boy video is that he’s playing himself by letting the world know where – and how unsecured – he keeps his shit. Even TMZ all but begged for someone to find out where this place is and pull a kick doe. Fortunately for Soulja Boy, I doubt goons could get anywhere near this apartment he’s in without getting raped by LAPD. The one good thing about living near rich white people is that you can count on 5-0 being vigilant than a motherfucker. Soulja Boy can probably hardly drive to his own house without getting pulled over. He just better hope he doesn’t get kicked out. He might have to move back to a neighborhood where he has to keep his jewels in a safe deposit box. And what good are they there?

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