A Eulogy for My Boo

No, this is not a lament for a dead girlfriend. Well, I guess it kind of is in a way.

I was still attending high school in 1996, which makes me an old, irrelevant, hatin-ass nigga. I know. “My Boo” by Ghost Town DJs from the So So Def Bass All-Stars album was that shit back when I was a teen and still relevant to society. We’re talking back in the days when I had yet to pay a bill of my own or sexify a fine wimminz—but was of course, center of the music-buying universe.

[Blogger’s Note: I’m rolling my eyes here.]

You know. The good old days when the music industry understood that adults bought rap records too, and that young people wanted what the grown folks fucked with. Today there’s some mass campaign to undermine everyone’s intelligence at once, and it’s even undershooting the juveniles, ha.

But I digress. Sorry. Nostalgia gets the best of me sometimes.

Little Jermaine Dupri and his So-So Dwarves were absolutely killing shit at this time. Dallas Austin was what we’d consider the now-extinct superproducer. OutKast had already sold a gang of Southernplayalisticadillacmuzik and ATLiens units and was positioning to blastoff into hyperspace, taking the rest of the Dungeon Family along. Despite being broke for some strange reason, TLC was just coming down from CrazySexyCool. I think “Waterfalls” was still in fucking rotation. Monica was coasting off Miss Thang. Needless to say, it was a good time to be from Atlanta and making negro music. It’s never not been, but you’d think Atlanta just started popping off if you listened to the commenters on some of these rap-flavored websites.

Mariah Carey’s “H.A.T.E.U.” remix is the latest mockery of “My Boo”. Granted, Pitbull, Lloyd and P-p-play N Skillz fucked it up just a couple years ago with “Secret Admirer”, but nobody listened to that shit or gave a flying fuck. Given what a few of the participants on the “H.A.T.E.U.” remix have accomplished in terms of legacy, it’s amazing to see how little they care about making such hot fucking garbage. This track belittles Mariah Carey, Big Boi, OutKast, Jermaine Dupri, and whatever’s left of the So So Def Bass All-Stars.

I guess by now they’re the So So Def Base All-Stars. They’re probably high on crack huddled over a flaming trash can as you read this. The most fucked up part is, with the destruction of “My Boo”, they won’t even have the satisfaction of being simultaneously recognized and pitied as some kid steps over them while napping off a crack bender in the subway station or shopping center parking lot.

Dupri signing off on, and probably suggesting this travesty of music, is likely a byproduct of he and his Ocean’s 7 cohorts’ financial irresponsibility. Too bad the Ghost Town DJs can’t do shit about it. They’ve got to sit back and watch their track get molested because Janet Jackson stopped giving Dupri allowance and this little nigga can’t cover his hotel/casino tab anymore.

Suga Momma’s not alone watching her life’s work go down in a sea. Carey singing the watered down version of Rayona Graham’s melody equals fail. A Big Boi ignorant to the fact that his career is over if he needs the warmth of Gucci Mane’s nutsack to stay Leftfoot equals fail. Jew Mane on anything but a speech pathology educational resource equals fail.

Needless to say, Gucci Mane, OJ Da Juiceman and their gingivitis grills should never have touched this track on a level beyond shitty mixtape exploration. And I still don’t know how they would have worked “Alaska”, “ice chain”, “nice brain” and “chickens” into “My Boo” seamlessly.

I meant that shit I said about Big Boi too. When Gucci Mane has the best verse on a track you’ve contributed to, it’s time to retire with dignity. Either that or snatch Andre 3000 up out the Men’s Wearhouse and get to work on some Kast shit, nigga. Big Boi needs to do one of the two. Nigga startin to look like he’s trynna earn himself a So Icey contract and the costume jewelry that comes with it.

In the meantime, I say good night to my sweet boo in autumn. At least she didn’t leave in summer.

Questions? Comments? Requests? And that’s real, Jazzy Belle. ron@ronmexicocity.com

  • geico lizard

    The best part of that Jazzybelle video is Dre 3000 in the strip club looking like he is about to have a stroke. Mariah is trying to crank out the hits before she has this baby and her body blows up to the size of Aretha Franklin. Mariah Carey trying to sell albums without her sexy body equals Jennifer Hudson.

  • Apollo Moses

    All I can say is exactamundo.

  • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

    “Mariah Carey singing the watered down version of Rayona Graham’s melody equals fail. A Big Boi ignorant to the fact that his career is over if he needs the warmth of Gucci Mane’s nutsack to stay Leftfoot equals fail. Jew Mane on anything but a speech pathology educational resource equals fail.”

    ^^^^^
    Rotfle Mayo. Man down, Mex. & a couple bystanders…

    Once 3 Stacks starting getting dandier than Mary Poppins, I didn’t see great things for Big Boi. & fuck it, I’ll say it; the nigga wasn’t necessarily all that slick with the verbiage to begin with, in my opinion. He had something to offer until Erykah Badu put that voodoo cooch on Undray. After that, it was knickers & knitted scarves. Daddy Fat Sacks never stood a chance. Loyalty is a motherfucker though.

    Cosign G. Liz. Aretha has her hats; Mariah has Nick. I guess now he’ll have to hold her purse & their kid. Nigga better learn how to juggle from one of the contestants on his TV show.

  • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

    Oh yeah….Mex, I’m class of ’94. By Hip Hop Head (yes hetero) standards, I should be doing commercials for ‘Just For Men’ like Emmitt Smith.

    “Ya beard is weird, ya stash is trash. Oooh, it’s bad”

  • Worley

    “We’re talking back in the days when I had yet to pay a bill of my own or sexify a fine wimminz.”

    What? You ain’t splash off in high school? You only get a pass freshman year. No coochie equals fail after that.

    Big Bwah is in serious trouble. It’s been that way since The Love Below. That Luscious Leftfoot album has been coming soon for a long time. God bless him.

  • Detroit P

    BURR! BURR! BURRPrint 3-D!….and yea I don’t like that H.A.T.E.U song

  • $ykotic/Don McCaine

    Shouts to all my ATL cats. Y’all been doing it in the game for a minute.

    But “H.A.T.E.U. RMX” is trash. Holla @ them people for f***ing up a classic.

    PEACE

  • hate

    co-sign worley

    only herb ass moafuckas still got they v card after 9th grade

    • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

      I didn’t lose my virginity until I was 18. By choice. So what?

      I had other, more important shit to do than let some broad’s vagine dictate my actions in high school. Cats was walking across stage on graduation day with their pregnant classmates/girlfriends/soon-to-be baby moms’, students giving each other crabs & herpes & what we now know was HPV & shit, hoes telling everybody’s who’s dick was small, who couldn’t hang, girls falling in love & stalking cats all day-waiting for them @ their lockers & on the quad, niggas fighting in the locker room over some ass while she’s fucking the rest of the Varsity team, etc. I just laughed at niggas & their ridiculously unnecessary problems, & kept it pushing.

      I learned early on, not only are females usually not worth the headache unless you’re really ready to deal with it, but there’s no hurry in most things. Shit’s not going anywhere.

      & as a society/culture/community/race (I think you said you were white, but even still…), maybe if more young man had a stronger foundation in the “I need pussy!!” department, there’d be less 40 year old grandparents & way less fathers & mothers who aren’t old enough to legally buy alcohol, much less make cognizant decisions on life altering activities.

      Shit’s always fun & games until somebody gets hurt, feel me (yes hetero)? Then everbody wants to cry foul. In hindsight, I’m glad I waited until I could approach it from a more mature level, because had I started early like most dudes, I would’ve fucked around & stuck pipe in any chick who didn’t stink. Fuck catching AIDS.

      But, to each his own, juice. Lol @ “v card”.

      • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

        Oh yeah, & don’t believe everything people tell you, champ. Motherfuckers lie on pussy regularly, unless you stood in the room & watched him.

        & that would make you a pervert, which is a bit worse than being a teenage virgin.

        • Worley

          Cut the bullsh*t. If you couldn’t get none just say so. I ain’t buying none of that moral “grand”standing.

        • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

          Lmao!

          No need for “Grand”standing, playboy. Thats my story & I don’t expect most folks to believe or understand. We don’t know each other, so I have nothing to prove.

          It is what it is, Worl.

      • http://www.myspace.com/emcdlthemusicprofile EmCDL

        Definitely co-sign Grands…

        It was the same shit back when I was back up in high school, dudes smashing chicks and bragging about it…then I see the same girl they were bragging about smashing walking down the hallway with a basketball stomach….not the business.

        By the way great blog Mex!

        My bad Commission, I’ve been MIA for a lil bit because of school and work, so I haven’t been puttin’ my two cents in lately. Trying to get my ed-ju-macation on!

  • caino

    Shit , any dude that be bragging in high school about getting the pootang, was Lying !!! dont trust noone when it comes to the poon!

    ps the remix is W.A.C.K

  • that nigga

    A Big Boi ignorant to the fact that his career is over if he needs the warmth of Gucci Mane’s nutsack to stay Leftfoot equals fail. Jew Mane on anything but a speech pathology educational resource equals fail.
    ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

    Yup! Jew Mane aint no Puff Daddy, neva was or will be and that nigga Puff makes me sick jumpin on er’body shit. And Big Boi, I thought the same thing bout his verse. Hang it up, go hard or go home. Where the fuck Is 3 Stacks when you need him?

  • Apollo Moses

    Tony Grands is a smart man. Fools be so ready to brag about their three minute sessions in high school. “What happen Keisha, your boyfriend c*m fast?”-Yeezy
    As for that brutal remix, don’t you rush to get old…mama use to say…if to stay relevant you have to record with non rappin ace figgas, the entire game is a wrap. I’m sorry, coming of age in HS from 94-98 a lot of music will forever be a part of the soundtrack, now that your gettin grown we find ourselves in bizzaro world of revisits…and I’m not feeling the “you and old head dismissals” either because there are too many fools trying to be forever young…I’ll keep my classics while the real herbs jig to the Waka Flaka…oh they do it…but not as an emcee.

  • capcobra

    the weekend i don’t check xxl is the same weekend they post 2 weekend blogs..ain’t that a bitch..speaking of bitches..mariah carey corny as hell..i’m tired of her hip hop remixes..and i’m starting to think jermaine dupri is morgan freeman in driving mrs daisy..it’s like everytime her buzz ain’t right mariah tries to do a hip hop remix and jermaine dupri is somewhere near it..what happened to the mariah that sung vision of love and that bullshit christmas song?…not only do she pimp the shit outta hip hop but she even try to use the old beyonce/destiny child double up flow now..and the shit sound aight til she gotta perform it..then it’s just turns horrible..she can’t walk and sing at the same time…have you seen her perform lately?..mariah sucks…and the crazy part is i still ain’t listen to the song..i can tell by the featured names that it’s some bullshit..plus she got gucci mane for back to back remixes..wtf..somebody stop this bitch before she’s the queen of hip hop and r&b.

  • Brooklyn

    mariah carey been wack ever since she left tommy mottola, nothing that she’s done after that = classic, and she damn sure don’t look as good. call me crazy, but i liked her better back in the day when she was looking puerto rican with the curly brown hair. point blank, the bitch lost her mind, now she walking around in too small shirts and marrying 25 year olds when she’s damn near forty, not a good look. mariah carey got that peter pan syndrome, she wants to be 15 forever, but we know that shit ain’t possible, black might not crack, but high yellow gets mellow. i was a kid when “my boo” came out, but i remember all the bitches in my elementary school singing that song and monica’s “why i love you so much”, they were definitely into that shit. i might get cursed out by some atlien for saying this, but atlanta was always better at making r&b than it was at making hip-hip.

  • http://dasteamwerkmusik.blogspot.com bollocks

    “Jew Mane on anything but a speech pathology educational resource equals fail.”

    As always, Ron Mex for the win!

    ….and word to Brooklyn. I fux with Mariah Carey all day just because I came up on that Emotions sheeeit, but word to her not making a classic as of late. Since she lost all her range, her music is sadly just “good,” not “great,” even when she works with the R&B Gorilla, The-Dream.

  • http://dasteamwerkmusik.blogspot.com bollocks

    PS – Ron, good looks for bringing that song up. I haven’t even heard this latest bastardization of it, but I heard the original Ghost Town DJs shit this weekend and it made me hella nostalgic. Had to peep the (awesome) video and get on gchat to forward a link to my own boo.

  • http://cocoasentertainment.com Steven Johnson

    “My Boo” by the Ghostown Dj’s will go down in history as a classic. However, a eulogy never but some people should know the facts before speaking! The lead singer is Virgo and it’s very apparent that this person Rayona “Suga Momma” Graham really wants to be Virgo. Moreover, the lead singer “Virgo” of the Ghost Town Dj’s is not on drugs and is doing very well I might add but I ask the question! Why would someone want to take credit of singing a song they didn’t sing?