Crash

You know being from the south gives you an opportunity to see how the racial profiling dynamic “really” works. Now….now….before errbody goes and thinks this is the moment I go all “Huey” (Newton or Boondocks), it isn’t (that ain’t what I’m saying). Not that there isn’t a need for that extreme view plus the action of protest and the threat of riot! We all know there is: the state sponsored murders of Bell & Grant, racial profiling, private prisons, basically black man hunting season in any PD in the US. So Amerikkka be happy we a peaceful people (Minister Khailids voice). I just wanna apologize on behalf of “Ye” and Our “Queen Califia” (google dat chica) Serena Williams (I know she’s a bit much 4 insecure bros but damn Common is the only rapper I envy, owwwww).

Apologize…..what?! KM tell me it ain’t so?! Yup me the writer of “That’s Life,” “Pressure” and “Bad Day Worst Day” is saying “I’m Sorry.”

I’m sorry that these two negroes lost their “cotton picking” minds this weekend, mind not to mention composer. Now ain’t nothing wrong with screaming on a line Judge “Califia” you just gotta make sure she ain’t Asian baby. Now…now I know you wanna object and the homie Com Sense right now is calling Dion (No ID 4 my number to say hey bruh….why u looking at my woman’s ass!). I’m just saying Serena that lady look just like the lady at the store my “Califia” buys a few “pieces” (code 4 weave).

Seeing your ever changing plethora of “Nu Dews” I know you ain’t doing the infusion thang like Oprah. You gotta be in the “beauty supply store” pretty regular or at least your assistant or mom or other sisters. Hence you should know there is a delicate and fragile truce between the Asian and African-American women’s community. So what you did just set us back 20 years. Do you want to return to the days when Cube wrote “Black Korean?” Sheiiiiit, you from Compton, you know how this sh*t go. You NEVER threaten the Asian lady (unless you a cute black kid with a foul mouth…”b*tch you betta gimmie my muthafugging money,” lol). This will get your azz locked up, shot or even worse, BANNED from the “weave sto.“ Now you 50 mill to the good, but what about your sista’s in the struggle; the struggle with kinky kitchens and quick weak fever. They wanna be able to walk the isles of the “weave sto” in peace un-bothered to the sounds of Chris Brown and T-Pain (Asian store’s ain’t get the “CB is banned” memo). And now because you threatened the sh*t outta that Asian lady in the fresh to death POLO jacket, these women’s experience will go like this:

AW: Sits with daughter frowning and pointing at sports section headline and pic of Serena spazzing on the line judge who resembles her aunt.

AAW: Enters “her” local “weave sto” before going to the “nail shop” next door and the African braiders a plaza over.

AAW: Um what the hell is this music ya’ll got on in here today…that sh*t irritating.

AW: This new music, no play Chris Brown any moe. You not get memo..smile.
Both women roll their eyes and turn away…

AAW: Well whateva…lawd lemme hurry up find this yacky in my color so I can go. This lady tripping today….umma call you back.
20 mins pass:

AAW still looks for her color. AW decides to “walk the floor” and adjust boxes near the AAW. Asian pop music is also louder on this particular song. Aggravated, the AAW turns to the AW.

AAW: Um excuse me, you ain’t gots to follow me, I have a good job. I don’t steal!

AW: What color you looking for?

AAW: The one in my MF’n hand, WHY!?

AW: You got yo color ok buy now and leave.

AAW What Bitch?! Leave…leave?! Do you know I will shove the yacky number 7 down yo throat? Do you?! You don’t know who you fugging wit. Uh b*tch I will whoop yo azz and TURN THAT FUGGING music off. I hate that ching chong sh*t anyway! Play some V-103. All yo customers black!

By now the young teenage Asian daughter who felt bullied by the black girl at her public high school and (teammate on the tennis team) will call the local PD who will promptly over react. The police arrive to drag the AAW out the store slam her onto the ground in full view of the public and his dash cam (this will later ensure he is fired) although he will not face charges and will be free to join another local PD.

While this happens, a group of young black male college students in skinny jeans, Kanye West Nikes and visor shades are going into the “weave sto” to buy fake diamond studs to complete their “look.” One of the college student’s develops a conscious and instead of looking away and ignoring the “abuse of a sista,” says, “Hey man, that’s a lady!” Looking up for a split second and seeing a brown man in tight denim, shades and a funny hair cut, the officer snaps. The cop see’s the monster that ripped the mic from the tender lily white clutches of the fair and pure country music maiden Taylor Swift at the VMA’a. He see’s the Black Zulu demon KANYE WEST! He flashes back to his 12 year-old daughter saying, “Daddy I hate Kanye West. Why can’t you arrest him? He was so rude to Taylor Swift.” Well now he can ….walking over to the 19 year old fashion forward college freshman he says, “Shut the F*CK UP! Seething with W.A.S.P furry, he thinks back to the two Kanye albums he bought his daughter’s older brother and how “Kanye” promoted being a college dropout (hence his son did). He even wondered was Amber Rose really white and being paraded around loosely like Jack Johnson did. KANYE WEST represents the FALL of W.A.S.P community control and here was his chance to make things right, right for his daughter, right for good Christians, right for Hannity. This was his chance to right America! He then, without giving lil’ Ye the right to remain silent, chokes the sh*t outta the kid and gives him a disorderly conduct and a weekend on Rice Street. By the time the black cop arrives, it’s to late to undo the damage that Ye and Serena have done. With out knowing it they helped to entrap a fellow brother and “sista” in the grips of the judicial system! One high school tennis star lost her mama for a weekend because her teammates mom never met her mom at the PTA. Though they had both been and did not speak to each other. A cop lost his job ensuring he’d hate all blacks forever, secretly and all rap music openly (even though Mr. West announced he is now a pop act, rappers will suffer for his indiscretion). Thanks Ye. The BM college attendee will lose focus and hope in becoming a lawyer, smoke weed, bullshit and become a public school teacher and girls tennis coach in your local high school. The AW store will return to playing CB in no time and all the people who watched that horrific sight will be back next week to ensure the “weave store” has brisk sales so the AW daughter can attend a private school next semester. Thanks YE thanks Serena. I don’t know what the f*ck Althea Gibson, Author Ashe, Chuck D and Ice Cube were thinking with all that dignity and righteous outrage sh*t. They should been wilding the fuck out and getting everybody’s head spilt…lol.

Only half serious today and I’m excited that CRASH the new season starts this week on Starz (is Starz really owned by BET?). Until tomorrow, please be kind to AW and teen W.A.S.P country music stars. The safety of the black community depends on it! Peace N*ggas….GTRGBBB

  • Silly Chilly Willy

    What’s good, Killa!

    Stephen Colbert is gonna have a field day over this. I can see it now (the sunglasses mannequin-display and maze-haired troubled genius Kanye….)

    • Silly Chilly Willy

      I shouldn’t laugh at this man, but that was some funny stuff !

      J7M

      • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

        @SC Willy

        You know it.

        The right-wingers are going to be all over Ye & Serena’s antics. Sad to say, but this is exactly the kind of ant hill that becomes a mountain.

        I’m all for freedom of speech, opinion & self expression, but there is a time & place for things. Serena wild out, & she knows it. But, she’s always looked like she was trying her hardest to keep from unleashing all that Compton taught her. I don’t care what she said though, you could bounce quarters off of that ass.

        As for Ye, we’ve discussed him enough already.

        • Silly Chilly Willy

          I can see it right now, we’ll be spending the next months defending hiphop everyday.

          Add to this the fact that Bill O call “My president is black” a racist song and get confused by “Answer the Call” saying is he good or bad, because he is a rapper and black and I have to put a tag on him. He got sonned by Jay with the signature of his book, though…

          On the other hand, this Obama fear circus makes me wanna side with some of this fuckery. I don’t advocate the shit, and it’s immature and fucked up, and all that, …..I’m just saying deep down inside me, I kinda, kinda understand…

  • these posts are racist

    Fuck the right wingers. Fuck the conservatives. Fuck Glen Beck. Fuck O’Reilly. Fuck these racist mutherfuckers. And fuck anyone who feels they should bite their tongue.

    Have you seen the posters of Obama the Tea Party or whatever those racists call themselves have made about our President? Unreal man. Unreal.

  • Brooklyn

    i wasn’t surprised that serena got buck, she’ straight outta compton. shit, call her and venus “girls in tha hood.” i thought that lady was white, but i wasn’t wearing my glasses so i couldn’t see that well anyway. but that asian lady was lucky that serena didn’t get seriously compton on her and pull a gun from up under her skirt and start popping bitches. with an ass as muscular as that, i can believe she’s hiding a piece under them cheeks.

  • BIGNAT

    man mike you talking about the crash t.v. show. then you just penned them a full episode hahaha. you got a craft with the pen like we didn’t know that already. serena was getting mad over a call she gets her pass. kanye was drunk and dumb even though he was right. i am sorry i don’t know who the fuck taylor swift is. taylor swift don’t even know she not nobody hahahah i am fucking around. you touched on boondocks that is the realest cartoon ever made and for the people who can’t stomach to watch it. you a pussy because it might joke alot but that shit is filled with so much reality. even the pimp named slick back episodes.

  • Killer Mike

    im joking but 4real 4ral we know this is how that shit really happens. Remeber how Arab Folks got treated after 911. err body had a hard on (no homo) for any one that looked like a terrorist….lol…BOL!!!!

  • Killer Mike

    BTW I’ve seen the Taylor swift video A thousan Times (AMTV) only Rappers, Kids preparing to go to school and Junkies are up this time o morning. I knew she had a W.A.S.P fan base and had to be Big in middle america. So I knew this was gonna get ugly when i saw it. Although i do think it was all staged. Come on Kanye off dat Henney HELL NAW!! The bottles was not even dented. Also B’s Vid is DOPE as FUCK but THRILLER is the greatest Vid ever…..and im a Rap Nigga so it took alot to admit that. God bless Ye, Serina and the Men behind the matrix at MTV.

    P.S. did any body look up that Queen Califia chica. Um telling u its a wild fact to find out about.

    • P. Harris

      Yeah, I looked up Queen Califia, still reading up on information now…

      Good look KM

  • Silly Chilly Willy

    The only good thing about all this is that I don’t have to defend myself when I say I love Beyoncé. What she did was fuckin sweeeeet. The Queen Califia award goes to her as far as I’m concerned.

    Thanks for puttin us on game, Killa. I wiki’d that and it’s pretty impressive. Always wondered where the name Cali came from.

  • X

    People making racial issues out of this, whoever they may be, are absolute morons concerning this topic. Also, everybody stereotyping people different then them culturally or politically is just being a hypocrite by complaining about it. You obviously wouldn’t like it if it was the other way around, so why are you engaging in it?

  • http://www.justice.gov.za GO-Getta’

    Serena lost her cool & i bet she might have said sum racial remarks that have her evicted from the US Open tournament.

    Anyway big ups 2 Clijters she played well & showed that working mom can b successful by winnin’ the US Open Championship.

    Kanye was just tipsy & was’nt being racial at all.
    Beyaaawn-ce did undo sum damages after all she allowed the poor soul Tylor 2 have a moment.

    • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

      She just had a flashback to the liquor store, & thought she was getting overcharged for a fifth of Erk & Jerk.

      I can’t imagine how she
      treats poor Common….

      Common: C’mon girl. Chillax, why you beefin’ wit me, baby?

      Serena: Wha? I told you to massage each cheek for 25 minutes! My ass don’t look like a volkswagon by accident!

      C: Aight luv, easy, you know I’m like the water for yo’ chocolate….

      S: Nigga, if you don’t gitcho’ bald headed, incense burnin’, *looks around room for a tennis racket* matter fact,-

      Poor guy. No wonder he carries her purse & tote bag.

  • Killer Mike

    @X

    Jus watch Crash homie and u will understand. Also did i or the other commentors make it racial or was that the thousand of folks whom choose to use the word NIGGER to describe Mr. West when Jerk, Asshole or Douche Bag would’ve worked fine.

    Im jus alluding to what the movie and show crash do. Take seemingly unrealated events and show how some small moments in the lives of people will tie and bind there lives in weird and some times traggic ways. i.e. a cop harrased a home owner who happens to be friends with the president who happens to say the cop acted stupidly. Sound far out but hey shit like this happens, Sorry if it offended in any way homie, but like Kanye say’s “i gotta be real.

    • these posts are racist

      Co-Sign.

    • X

      I understand that. It’s all good. I’m just attacking that kind of behavior. Like you said, asshole or douchebag would have worked just fine in Kanye’s case.

      And by the way, I am not offended at all. Just being real like you said you were being. Appreciate it.

  • caino

    l find it amazing that kats in the grand ole US of A get so heated over the VMA’s l mean its MTV…noone watches MTV since they stopped playing music videos, and the fact its getting slowly turned into a race thing leaves me scratching my head!

    If 2 people dont get along and they are different races doesnt mean that its because of their race that they dont get along ! it might be because one of them is a douche !!

  • REAL TALK

    CLASSIC = before errbody goes and thinks this is the moment I go all “Huey” (Newton or Boondocks)

  • General

    We can all agree that neither the Serena Williams nor the Kanye West episodes had anything to do with race, but we all know that these are the type of events that Fox News and the fringe elements of the right wing love to use to stoke more flames of fear and hatred in our country…

    We all know that they are gonna treat this (Kanye incident) as the evil out of control negro attacking the innocent pure American girl and use it as an example of how the country has lost its way and needs to return to the way it was when the “founding fathers” were alive aka slave holders…

    We just need to make sure that we don’t follow that path with them. I’m not talking about keeping your mouth shut, but instead making sure that we don’t waste our time in helping them make this out to be more than what it was, which was a druken celebrity with emotional issues who made an ass out of himself…

    Don’t fall for the bait

  • 3rd eye clear

    King was assassinated in 68′..42 years ago!
    To say that race is not still a factor in the USA is just crazy!
    My mother has stories, my grandfather just made friends with a white person two years ago, not because he is racist but he feared white people. Can’t blame him after being chased from Alabama in the heat of the night, with part of his face removed.
    We come some ways in this little time (42 years) but we have a ways to go.
    You can’t hold a person for over 400 years and then tell that person after 42 years everything is equal and they are on an even playing field… FOH

  • http://WWW.MAJORMUVS.COM *BLOCK*

    BLOCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    @ KILLER MIKE

    THIS OFF SUBJECT LIKE HELL BUT HELL WHAT BETTER TIME THAN THE PRESENT….I GOTTA PATNA THATS BEEN WORKING WIT BIG KUNTRY AND MACK BONEY..WE WERE UP THERE THIS PAST WEEKEND @ BANKHEAD DAY AND AT CLUB RITZ…ANYWAY HOW DO I GET IN CONTACT WITH YOU ABOUT GETTING YOU IN THE STUDIO WITH HIM??

  • Apollo Moses

    Smart and Funny drop…but WTF is wrong with being a public school teacher?

  • Moving Sideways

    Actually, I haven’t seen the Serena incident, but I thought that tennis players wylin’ the fuck out at calls was part of the game (see: McEnroe, John). As for the racist stuff, ‘Ye fucked up because he’s a douchecopter, not because he’s of the African-American persuasion.

  • http://www.myspace.com/pharris27610 P. Harris

    co-sign 3rd Eye Clear

    Race is a huge factor. I don’t care what anyone says but in my city, Raleigh, or the Greater Raleigh-Durham Area racism is definitiely evident. It may not be the same racism that my fathers father went through but it has just changed.

    I thank god for my raise and promotion that I received last year and how I was moved out of the area where all the brother and sisters worked to the big bldg. where it’s prodominantly white. It felt good and it was an accomplishment. But this past year I’ve dealt with people not wanting to get on elevator with me, I speak and won’t get spoken back to, I get looked at funny but I wear slacks, button up, and a tie everyday, and only in my immediate department do I feel like my opinion matters. With all that said, it may not be as rampant as it used to be, but it’s still there.

    Now my point is how you react to things. I take it for what it is and I’m going to milk this company as long as I can and as far they let me go up I’m going to keep milking them. I’m not going to curse out nobody for not riding on the elevator with me. Shit, I get a straight ride to my floor because of that. Milk. You look at me funny and you’ll get loud sarcastic ass good morning from me. I speak to you and you don’t speak back then I’ll speak again and again until you open up your dayum mouth. I’m not rude when I do it, but I’m establishing myself as I’m not taking this shit from you and you’re not going to get at normal “nigger” reaction out of me. That’s what they want “Ye”, “Serena”…

  • Killer Mike

    @ Apollo Moses

    Nothing moses i love teahers check a couple blogs back “who needs culture” Im jus saying if u were meant 4 law u should not go and undereducate student cuz u didnt. To all teachers sorry if i threw ya’ll under the bus. Peace.

    @ Block grindtimeofficial@gmail.com

  • macdatruest

    Black people are savages when they wild out or niggers right? Courtney Love stormed the MTV awards red carpet she wasnt a meth-faced cracker whore. Brittany Spears baldhead flashin coochie. John McEnroe wild out he aint an animal. Michael Phelps is an olympian, he driving drunk and blowing loud pack kush. Oh yea he feels sorry. But it’s not just the double standards is the whole profiling of black people as a “community” only when one black person fucks up in the public light or a black person is publicly mistreated and it cant be covered up.

    When MJ (both) were rising to greatness it wasnt racial. When Timberlake switched from N’Sync bubble gum pop to being a fake ass black man, it wasnt racial or even a nod toward the quality of black music and producers. Basically when any black person does something good its just the one individual. When a nigga fuck up, then it’s “them”

    I was reading an interesting article about ‘bubbles’ that were going to bust, which are areas so oversaturated in the economy that they are bound to collapse. Like the educaton bubble: everybody is going back to school but there are no jobs for any graduates. Or how the internet bubble burst after everybody tried being an internet entreprenuer early 2000. The next bubble about to burst which I was tellin my homeboy before I even read this article is the RACIAL TOLERANCE BUBBLE.

    People tried to act so racially together in America once Barack got in office and some black idiots even started saying racism was over.As the economy slips even more, which it is as we speak, and unemployment tops that of the great depression which it will (unless they change the way they measure unemployment AGAIN to obscure the harsh reality that we are fucked jobwise in America) all the Barack love is gonna turn into hate.

    Bush fucked up too, and left the mess for Barack–but he wasnt black, and rich people didnt suffer. Barack on the other hand, he’s just black enough to take the fall for the almost all white male governing body. Then an overall backlash against “dumb niggers” in all social and economic areas is gonna start. Trust me, Im always right… True Shit! Public unrest and civil turmoil. After that….FEMA Camps and Martial Law it’s the only way our government can afford to function with the amount of debt we’re in. But the events leading up to Martial Law have to appear random and insignificant,then the media has to throw gasoline on them. Like this Kanye shit and the Serena shit.

    • DV8

      true indeed….I can feel it in the air (Sigel, not Phil Collins but I love that track too)

  • macdatruest

    oh yea I read about The Amazon Queen Califia I didnt see her pictures, but she sound like she got a fat ol’ ass from the historical accounts haha! I’ll time machine dat…

  • dusty boy

    Call me blind but all I saw was Kanye THROWED in the GAME… I’m sure he said sorry cause when he saw him self he realized he was acting like a puto…

    What it do to the whole DIRTY 3RD!!!!

    RIP DJ SCREW, FAT PAT, H.A.W.K., Big Moe, Pimp C, Mafio, Gator, and all the fall SUC soldiers!!!

    Bangin’ 3 n the Moring RED Edition!!! Classic SCREW!!!!

    Whats up to Killer Mike!!! Its good to see TRILL southern boyz writing for XXL!!!