Shit just got deeper than rap

I can't help but appreciate rappers more when I find out they really do the crazy shit they write about in their songs.

For example, when I found out that the Clipse really are epic drug dealers, I thought to myself, Man, I'm gonna have to go back and revisit their work. Maybe even Hell Hath No Fury. (Okay, maybe not Hell Hath No Fury.) But of course I didn't: It's not like I keep that shit handy, as if I'm Tom Breihan or somebody. I did hear that song they did with Kanye once on Shade 45, while I was on my way to Jack in the Box, and Stern 100 was running one of their patented half an hour-long commercial breaks. I thought it was one of the gayer things I've heard in a while, aside from the beat, which might be some of Kanye's better work in ages. The raps, though, were as teh ghey as a three dollar. Kanye may have even pwned them on their own shit, like he did Jay-Z on the similarly sad "Run This Town." I'm not sure. I wasn't paying that close attention.

But I digress.

Then there's Rick Ross, who may or may not have had someone from Don Diva magazine killed. A guy named Samuel Ferguson, who was old enough to have gone to high school with my father, got shot at on the freeway in Miami the other day, just like T.I.'s weed carrier when he made the mistake of making it rain on those hoods in Cincinnati, then he crashed his car into a median. He was pronounced dead at the scene, though it wasn't clear in the reports I read (AllHipHop and some local TV news) whether it was the gunshots or the crash that did it. If it was black people shooting, something tells me it was the crash. But they don't know for certain who did the shooting. They just know it was someone in a black four door sedan. And you know how it is with these hip-hop crimes. I wouldn't be surprised if the assailants get off scot-free, especially if Alfamega wasn't around to see who it was. Roffle.

Speaking of law enforcement, Rick Ross now finds himself in a tough predicament. Check this quote from towards the end of the story on AllHipHop (censorship theirs):

“Ferguson is a liar, he’s an informant, he’s a rat, he’s a b***h,” Rick Ross said of Ferguson during their feud. “I hope he’s offended; get at me in the streets n***a you know how we play. This s**t about to get Deeper Than Rap.”

Aww dang....

Rawse was supposedly pissed at Ferguson for outing him as a former prison guard. But it sounds like part of it may have been some confusion as to the purpose of an interview Ferguson conducted with Rawse. Rawse had known Ferguson since before he was a rappers, perhaps as far back as when he was still checking for contraband underneath ninjas' ballbags and occasionally having poo flung at him. At any rate, Ferguson must have been aware that Rawse was once five-o and had the sheer balls to mention it in both Don Diva and Hip Hop Weekly. If Rawse knew Ferguson was about to put his business out in the street, he probably wouldn't have granted the interview in the first place. And it sounds like he may have been pissed that the interview ended up in Hip Hop Weekly as well as Don Diva, similar to how ODB's manager/shylock was pissed that an interview ODB granted to Rolling Stone ended up elsewhere. (There's a mildly amusing followup to the post I did on him, but I don't have the time or space to recount it here.)

So, of course now everyone's gonna think Rawse put the hit out on this guy. And you know how five-o likes to conduct investigations using old issues of rap magazines. They've probably got some ninjas down at the station as we speak, trying to get them to pull an Alfamega on Officer Ricky. If I were Rawse, I'd keep an extra close eye on my weed carriers right about now - maybe invite them out for crab meats, just to see where their heads are at. No fishsticks. Even if Rawse didn't have anything to do with it, you know how these weed carriers are. They'll start making shit up, just to avoid having to 18 months in prison. They're weak like that. That's why they follow rappers around, rather than have rappers follow them around. And Rawse knows what it's like in prison. After all, he used to work there. If he definitely wasn't involved, he might need to holler at some of his former colleagues down at the station and run down his alibi.

On the other hand, this could be a good opportunity for Rawse to solidify his street cred. I'm not sure if there's a specific codicil for this in the Code of the Streets, but you'd think that being an ex-cop and having someone killed would cancel themselves out. If he can somehow convince the world that he did it without convincing his previous employer to lock him up for it, Fiddy Cent's Officer Ricky taunts would be effectively rendered moot. The key is to be very subtle with it, the way the Clipse have been with their manager's drug bust. The older one keeps doing these videos about how he enjoys pancakes (don't we all?) and he can only afford a BMW, but obviously the idea is to reinforce the fact that he was moving weight, just like Jay-Z does at some point or another in every song he's ever made. Rawse is already off to a good start with this quote threatening that this shit is about to get deeper than rap. Which is amazing to me on a number of levels. Not only does it sound like something Marlon Brando might say in the Godfather, if there was a such thing as rap music in the 1940s, it even ties in to the name of his new album (one of TPAR's favorites btw).

Possible title for the next Rawse album (or at least a song on it): Sleep with the Crab Meats (See What I Did There?)