Man up, Drake

Drake needs to decide if he’s a total badass who’s too good for a record deal, or if he’s just another pussy who takes orders from the TIs. There is no in between.

He got caught in a lie the other day, when he told the Fader magazine that he doesn’t fuck with Universal Motown, his deal is with Universal Republic; then I guess someone had to call and explain to him that, even though he signed with Universal Republic, whatever that is, he’s now with Universal Motown. So shut the fuck up.

And he did. Not only that, but he went on MTV and apologized for having the sheer balls to talk shit about his tall Israeli benefactors. The fuck?

Drake was pissed at Universal Motown boss Sylvia Rhone, because he auditioned for her a few years ago, and she told him to keep it moving. He’d better stick with his career as the handicapped (and kinda black) kid on Degrassi Junior High.

He was probably especially pissed, because he expected there to be some sort of lightskinted kinship between the two of them. It just goes to show what little he knows about race relations here in the US. The last thing a light skinted black woman needs around is a light skinted black man. His hair might be a little bit better than hers, and that’s why she told him to go the fuck on somewhere.

But now that he’s poised to be the next big thing, she sees the error of her ways. It says in Billboard that she’s been going around telling people she discovered Drake. Only thing is, he was signed to some other bullshit subsidiary of the same major label everyone else and their grandma is ultimately signed to. So she went behind his back and had him transferred to Universal Motown.

I wonder if she bought Drake from some white guy in exchange for a case of Heineken, like my boo Kate Hudson in the movie Almost Famous. Or was that even necessary? It’s not like the people who really own these labels really give a rat’s ass if Drake is on Universal Republic or Universal Motown. The money will still end up in the same account. It might be better for Drake to be on Universal Motown, since the name Motown suggests black people, and Drake obviously needs to look as black as possible.

You can see why Drake would be pissed off at some shit like this. He thought he had a deal similar to the deal they give you over at Koch, or whatever it’s called these days, where all the label does is manufacture and ship CDs. Once they take their cut, for whatever that cost, you get the rest of the proceeds from album sales, plus complete ownership of your masters (as if that last Sheek Larouche album will be worth jack shit 10 years from now).

The first clue that Drake’s deal was a bit different from what you might get at Koch or somewhere was when they gave him a $2 million advance. He should have known, when they started talking that kind of money, that they wanted something in exchange. If Drake didn’t know that they could just randomly put people any ol’ person in charge of his career, as if he worked for the online department at XXL, who knows what else he signed over to them. They must have had someone explain this to him the other day, before he went on MTV and apologized to Sylvia Rhone.

What kind of shit was that anyway? You don’t have to issue a televised apology when you curse out your boss at White Castle. You don’t even lose your job. Trust me, I should know. And people who work at White Castle actually need that $200 a week. There were times, a few years ago, when I ate nothing but White Castle for months at a time, because they let you eat for free, and I needed any extra money I had for alcohol (gotta have priorities). If I had the sheer balls to tell a 50 year-old white woman to take a mop and shove it up her ass, I’m at a loss for why Drake is on TV apologizing. to Sylvia Rhone.

50 Cent never would have done anything like that. Fiddy Cent stays talking shit about Jimmy Iovine in songs and on the radio, throwing roid rage fits in the Interscope offices, and what have you, and you don’t see him having to apologize on MTV. Fiddy Cent can’t put out a new album soon enough. Literally. That’s because Fiddy and Jimmy both know that, whenever Fiddy does drop another album, it’s about to be Jimmy Iovine’s payday, even though he hardly contributed anything to it. If Jimmy Iovine doesn’t like what Fiddy Cent has to say about him, probably the most he could do is put Fiddy’s recording career on hold, which would just be payday interruptus.

Similarly, I’m pretty sure Drake could have refused to get punked by Sylvia Rhone, without having his career put on hold. Sylvia Rhone is just the lightskinted black woman they put in charge for PR purposes. I doubt there’s any way she could interfere with the release of such an important album, for the sake of her own ego. There’s way too much money riding on it. The TIs would probably get rid of her before they got rid of Drake. If the same thing that happened to Drake happened to me, I would have issued a statement to MTV, but it wouldn’t have been anything like the statement he issued.

  • http://Pierzy11@gmail.com Pierzy

    “Drake needs to decide if he’s a total badass who’s too good for a record deal, or if he’s just another pussy who takes orders from the TIs.”

    I think it’s pretty clear he’s the latter. I mean, look at the dude. Put on another sweater and leave us alone, homeboy.

    • http://www.myspace.com/federalranga Federal Ranga

      Co-sign

      By the way check out my new vlog I recorded at South Beach which is very special place for me. That is where I met my boyfriend. If you want to see him check out my youtube video of “Turn My Rap On”

      http://www.youtube.com/federalranga

      This shit is classic

      • http://myspace.com/federalranga Federal Ranga

        Hello, clone…

        Somebody’s never heard the phrase “no such thing as bad publicity”. If you’re going to promote my shit, don’t forget to mention that it’s E6… Take care now, bye bye then. (Word to Ace Ventura)

        Commission!!!
        youtube.com/federalranga

        • http://www.myspace.com/federalranga Federal Ranga Fan

          “Somebody’s never heard the phrase “no such thing as bad publicity”.”

          Any publicity is great. I’m trying to get as many people as possible to watch this vlog of yours. Its the funniest shit I have seen.

          I mean come on. We got you with the emo nigga singing and dancing to your remake of a Soulja Boy song, which was pure genius.

          Then we have you doing a whole episode about guns from your mama’s basement, again I applaud your comic skill.

          And now “Episode 6″ on South Beach (are you kidding me) to talk about hip hop. The satire and irony in each episode is unparalled by any of the vlogs I have seen.

          And the best part is that each week you come on here and promote it like it is a serious blog about hip hop. I don’t know if that is just part of the built in comedy of it, but it works.

          So I will continue to promote it and hope that more people have time to enjoy it.

          I just believe in trying to promote it for what it is, comedy.

  • General

    “If Jimmy Iovine doesn’t like what Fiddy Cent has to say about him, probably the most he could do is put Fiddy’s recording career on hold,”

    I don’t know if you have paid attention, but that is exactly what has happened. Before I Self Destruct has been shelved goin on almost a year now. And even though 50 says it is going to be released in September, Interscope hasn’t given it the green light, but all of this is old news…

    Just as this story with Drake is getting to be old news real fast…

    You guys should really check to see what the other bloggers on this site are doing, because its like you guys are just rehashing each others blogs….

    Someone else did this blog on Friday

    • http://www.byroncrawford.com/ Bol

      Well, I did a post on Drake before whoever did that post Friday.

      I basically discovered Drake.

      Go fuck yourself.

      • General

        You from the Lou, ain’t you got a post on Chingy or something??? J Kwon???

        No…

        Oh well, its just the Drake/Motown thing is gettin old. Everybody talkin bout how Drake is overhyped, yet that is all the same bloggers that are bitchin about it are writing about, hmmmm

        • Sincere

          “Oh well, its just the Drake/Motown thing is gettin old. Everybody talkin bout how Drake is overhyped, yet that is all the same bloggers that are bitchin about it are writing about, hmmmm”
          General truest thing i’ve read on this drop.

        • http://www.myspace.com/federalranga Federal Ranga

          Really, please watch my vlog. My mama said she can only watch it so many times to try to get the number of views up, and I know there is only gonna be like 4 niggas from the Commission that watch it. Please, please watch it. I’m trying not to shoot it at the Shell station anymore. I did one from my bedroom and one from the basement, please. I got one on a park bench. I even tried one without the glasses, although I couldn’t see shit. Please watch it. Please. You can even catch some footage of South Beach.

          http://www.youtube.com/federalranga

        • Quan

          ^ ^^^^ ^^^ ^
          when i read this all i could think of is

          ” I got these cheeseburgers man! !”

        • valdez

          “I’ll suck yo dick!”

          “What the fuck u just say to me?”

          “I said I’ll suck yo dick.”

          HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! CLASSIC

  • SOMETHIN NEW

    Another waste of space of a blog.This was discussed about a week ago.To XXL,give this dude the boot and put someone on who actually can come up with better shit.

    He’s always talking about the T.I’s like they don’t have some type of control or ownership of this site or magazine.We all know Blacks don’t run or own anything to do with hip hop nowadays.So get over it and step it up Bol.

  • Mutada/Mullah Atari

    Good post Bol, not with all the light skin dark skin shit. Black people are black. Period.

    But since you spread the bigotry around pretty equally, and everyone gets it. I aint mad

  • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grands

    According to the formula for “success”, he’ll get robbed soon, arrested for stupid shit, & impregnate some washed-up R&B chick.

    Drake FTW!

  • Brooklyn

    “Drake needs to decide if he’s a total badass who’s too good for a record deal, or if he’s just another pussy who takes orders from the TIs. There is no in between.”

    drake thought that he was a bad ass, the fact that he got shot on degrassi had him thinking he was gangsta, that combined with the fact that he’s been hanging with wayne and them had him convinced that he was thugged out. but at the end of the day, drake realized that he needed the support of his T.I. uncles if he was going to get anywhere with this rap thing, so he apologized. but that isn’t surprising, this dude apologizes for everything, the role of being the unintimidating negro has been too well ingrained in him, he made his fortune off of being that for canadian television.

    • http://www.myspace.com/federalranga Federal Ranga

      He ain’t grimey like the Commission!!

      By the way check out my new vlog I recorded at South Beach which is a very special place for me. That is where I met my boyfriend. If you want to see him check out my youtube video of “Turn My Rap On”

      http://www.youtube.com/federalranga

      This shit is classic

      Shout to my man Tony Grands.

      We run this shit

  • Grimey G

    Drakes already got it stacked against him being light-skinned. Light-skinned blacks are not cool. Name some successful lightskinned blacks? All I got is John Starks

    • http://Pierzy11@gmail.com Pierzy

      Terrence Howard?

    • http://Pierzy11@gmail.com Pierzy

      John Legend?

    • chitchat

      Barack Obama?

    • chillin mayne

      beyonce??….bol?

    • n.

      you ignorant fuck.

  • RAWshad

    “Drake needs to decide if he’s a total badass who’s too good for a record deal, or if he’s just another pussy who takes orders from the TIs. There is no in between.”

    That nigga Drake is softer than Charmin tissue though. The nigga apologize to Motown Records or whatever they’re called after the fact he done dropped a recorded track that dissed them. That shit is recorded and all over females ipods by now.

    He could’ve held his ground or squashed it behind scenes. Either way he looking like a real bitch ever since he fell on stage, curled up in a lil’ ball crying and shit. IDK what else to say…

  • Jhon da Analyst

    Fuck you Nigga!!@Grimey G………no homo!

  • http://xxl All Dae

    tru tru…

    He shouldn’t apologize…he looked dumb for talking out his ass in the first place. Now he kisses ass publicly. not a good start…add the hurt leg and wow…our rookie of the year is injure prone. At least he got 2 milli to keep him warm…no hate.

  • http://www.myspace.com/atlatino404 El Tico Loco

    Dude been a bitch, it was just a matter of time like I keep telling ya’ll. This nigga’s gonna unravel right before our eyes even worse than Young Berg

  • BIGNAT

    i totally agree with not doing it that way. i would not have been on t.v. saying i am sorry. i would have said sorry but phrased it a little bit different. i would have issued a statement saying “yeah i fucked up but i still don’t like her ass. she passed on me and crushed my dreams. now she all on my coat tails now that i got a little bit of buzz. hopefully she won’t have anything to do with any of my projects. her hateful ass might try to sabotage me. god night and good bless”

  • Bsondabeat
  • Pana

    Successful lightskinted black person…. Uhhhh Luda, Obama, T.I., Deborah Lee, Kesha Cole, Halle Berry, Will Smith!, Vanessa Williams and of course, YN! Lmao!

  • giantstepp

    “There were times, a few years ago, when I ate nothing but White Castle for months at a time, because they let you eat for free, and I needed any extra money I had for alcohol (gotta have priorities).”

    Too funny! Bol is a fool.

  • tronthadon

    Some niggas dont belong in tha rap game..stick to acting he talk like a bitch..act like a bitch..must be a fagot..

  • http://desubmityournews.info/ Merri Sherr

    Why is it that this content jogs my memory of one other comparable one who Someone said somewhere else?