I Blame Michael Jackson…

wayne drake

The real rap music story that I wanted to discuss on independence (independents) day was the joint where they finally let it out the bag who was pulling Drake’s strings.

Did any of you humps think for a second that Drakes Cakes was going to be anything other than Lil’ Wang’s weedcarrier? Wang can’t afford to get busted for possession again while he is still under indictment in Arizona (you see how the Arizona sheriff Joe Arapaio did DMX?).

Part of the signing bonus is that Drakes Cakes gets to use LIl’ Wang’s daughter as his own personal video vixen. What meathook would send out a nine year old to be used as a prop for a song that explicitly described giving broads the business end of your manhood? Drakes Cakes made the best call by blaming it on Michael Jackson. “You see, Michael Jackson was dead and everyone was doing tributes, and well you see…”

The B.E.T. clusterfuck however wasn’t the most disappointing news about Drake. The fact that the ruse of Drake being the ONLY person to be placed on terrestrial radio without having a distributor over his head had run its course. I’m not a cynic that doesn’t like the dude’s music, sure it’s got more sugar in it than high fructose corn syrup, but that is like any pop music. Drake is the Timberlake of rap music. Too bad he doesn’t act as well as Timberlake does. I need to see less acting from Drake and more boobies. I hope they use the same chicks from his first video to reprise their role as titty mannequins for ‘Every Girl’.

You humps didn’t think that all of this publicity wasn’t being paid for? It was somehow organic? Grow the hell up. You can’t turn a wheel as cumbersome and inefficient as the music industry without some major entity putting their weight on it. Why? Because there is way more music being produced than is played on the radio formats and if you don’t want to pay for those spins your artist receives there is someone that will.

Remember that radio is just as ‘old model economy’ as the record business. It was the radio that CREATED the music industrial complex. The same way the auto industry is fueled by gasoline. Except the radio decided that only a few artists will have the chance to ascend. It’s usually solo artists where pop music is concerned. There have been boy bands that have ascended too and I hope that SlaughterHouse gets to be one of the chosen few, but I haven’t heard a track from them on the radio yet. Koch, er, E-1 Records may not have the money needed to play games with Clear Channel.

Drake has been the exact opposite with his voice being broadcast several times an hour. Drake gets what he always wanted too which is the direct connect to superstardom. Collabos with Lil’ Wayne, KanYe West and Jay-Z. He no longer has to sit in a wheelchair to get a check. No one even cares that he’s an immigrant either. This guy’s future is all but set. Somebody send in the 10yr old bride.

  • http://trackhustle.ning.com Indy

    My man Drake had a torn ACL. What else could he do? He didn’t want to make a big fuss about the performance because it was a Michael Jackson Tribute show. I guess the main problem is that they over hyped the performance and had him closing the show. I wonder what he had planned that BET didn’t provide for the performance. I think if they had some models using the stage like a catwalk it could have made the performance better. Or maybe had a few celebrities come out while he was performing.

    • SHAYYduhh

      C’MON MAN ARE YAL SERi0US yAll hAtin 0N dRiZZy? dAtZ dA bEST RAPPA iN iT..!
      C’MON MAN..!
      dA 0Nli REAS0N lil WAyNE’S dAUGhtER && fRiENdS WERE 0N the StAGE WAS bECAUSE thEY’RE PERf0RMANCE WAS lASt MiNUtE..!
      dRAkE AiNt GAY(WAyNE iS th0] bUt yAll jUZ hAtiN kUS hE CAME 0VA hEA tAh yAll C0UNtRY && tAki 0VA i CNt bEliEVE yAll kAWlEd hiM Ah iMMiGRANt..! l0l GNR All dAt..!
      yAll A bUNChA hAtaZ..!
      hE BEEN iN it $ Ah fEW yEARS && GOt M0 REP&&bUZZ && Ah biGGER fAN bASE dAN M0St ARtiStS Wh0 bEEN iN it dAe Wh0lE liFE..!
      bECAUSE hE SPit fLAME..!
      i0NEEN kAi WAt hE du..!
      iF hE tURN gAY iMA kEEP d0Wl0Adin hiS MiXtAPES..!
      dAtS GNE AlWAyS bE MAh fAV RAPPA..!
      POINt blANk..!
      YAll hAtAZ..!

  • Pierzy

    Up early in the morning…

    Ron Mexico & I discussed this the other day. It is CLEAR how inorganic and packaged this entire situation is. It’s being sold to us…actually it’s being forced down our throats. You don’t get that amount of spins for free!

  • Jhon da Analyst

    Dude, I’m a grown ass man. I don’t have time to listen to some pop-fueled “rapper”. This nigga is like an adopted backstreet boy. GTFOH wit dat shit. Needless to say, I’ve never heard any of his shit. Of course that’s by choice. Fuck dat nigga!! No homo…

    • nellz

      so your just hating.

  • Jamal7Mile

    “What meathook would send out a nine year old to be used as a prop for a song that explicitly described giving broads the business end of your manhood?” – DP.

    It had to be someone at BET who never heard the song before (Steve??) and simply wasn’t on their job. This was a blind “green-lighted” show that was tossed out on stage, foresight be damned. No one checked Jamie Foxx either. And was Ving Rhames’ drunk ass REALLY supposed to walk out there on stage? Something tells me he wasn’t.

    I heard that BET denounced the performance, but I haven’t read that story yet. The replays blur out the kids on stage but… to little, too late.

    W/O hate, I’m not a Drake fan. His incredible buzz compelled me to listen to a few tracks via YouTube, but nah, I’m not bitin’ at the bait.

    • Jamal7Mile

      Oh yeah, nice drop Dallas. Good morning peeps. How’s the classes going, P?

  • Pierzy

    Good morning, Jamal…

    Classes are cool but you know how it is. You can’t wait to get done and then when you’re done you miss it…but grad school is nothing like undergrad. Those were the days [no Asher Roth]. All in all, it’s cool – I have 6 weeks in summer session and then my last semester in the fall is the equivalent of a thesis course. I’m sure at that point I’ll lose my title of fastest commenter on XXL.com.

    Good looks, man… I appreciate it. How are things on your side? What’s poppin’?

    • Jamal7Mile

      What’s up P?

      Don’t worry about that title… you got bigger and better things to do out there in Philly. We understand.

      Not going too good up here in The Mitten. Just read that the state is about to lose another 300k jobs by 2010. Real talk, I might have to move out East, West or South before the end of the year.

      But enough of the depressing talk… the sun is shining, the backyard pool is cool/warm, and I don’t have to work today. Plus, I’ll launch my first-ever blogspot real soon; just gotta hammer out the format, particulars, etc.

      I’m happy, well-fed and Blessed. That’s all that matters.

      • http://Pierzy11@gmail.com Pierzy

        Damn…I appreciate your outlook. I need to get some more of that perspective in me.

        Keep me/us posted on the blogspot. You know we’ll be regulars over there too!

        • Jamal7Mile

          I shall. Just look for the black “Jamal7Mile” to turn purple, LOL!

        • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grand$

          Sup’r 7Mile & P!?

          J, don’t plan on the Cali move. Just an FYI. Its not much better out here, bruh. Mr. Movie Star Governor is talking money out of our mouths to put in his pocket, behind a cloud of innuendo’s & clusterfuck proposals. Fuck Arnold Schwarzeneggar. & his movies, even Raw Deal.

  • OG Matt Herbz

    Man, fuck Drake. And I mean that–fuck his sweet ass. He gay. He ain’t gangsta and he ain’t even hard. I bet if I spill my drink on dude in the club, he won’t even get buck about it. I’ll spill my drink on that fool, pull the pink hanky out his suit and slap him in the face with it and he’s just gonna stand there acting pissy like a little bitch. I bet his face’ll turn red and all that too like a little ho. Probably wave his hand in some wannabe-diva-ass motions, too, and walk back to his ho-tel room crying on some bitch’s shoulder.

    I heard “Best I Ever Had” like 3 days ago and it was the “Worst I Ever Heard.” That was the weakest song based on the premise that you got to lie to these hoes to keep them on your dick. Fuck that shit, homo-rapper. I tell these women the TRUTH. If honey’s teeth abrased my dick, I’m a let her know, “Bitch, you’re drawing blood, how about I fuck your ass instead.” If she’s just laying there and just taking it, I say “Bitch, I ain’t your daddy–don’t just lay there and take the dick. Act like you want it–The Herbz giveth and the Herbz taketh away.”

    What bitch is gonna hear this gay song and swoon over this fag that straight up admits he’s gonna lie to your ass and tell you that you were the best he ever had? That dick knows the best he ever had was when Wayne gave him the back-end business and tipped him with a reach around. He ain’t been able to rub one out without a plug in his ass, since. Fucking up-in-the-ass-crack rapper.

    I’m off my rocker today, mang. I’m killing anybody who’s bobbing their head to Drake’s shit. Don’t be surprised when Herbz grabs you by the back of the neck and forces you to bob your head on this dick. I’m mean like that, mang. Cold. Drake is an industry slut of the worst kind. He’ll suck dick or eat clit to pop off in this shit. He shady; not to be trusted. Turn that shit off, kids.

    –OG Matt Herbz–

    • vhingrhamesonyo’momma

      ^^^^
      WHO CAN POST AFTER SOME SHIT LIKE THAT? GODDAMN HERBZ!

    • http://www.bboycult.com www.bboycult.com

      ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS!!!!

      boy you cold! i mean pimp cold! i mean old pimp on the ho stroll cold! if you ain’t got a bitch, you’ll get a bitch! i mean one that pay when she lay, jack!

      my girl used to say niggas that pout they mouth, like Drake doin in the picture above, suck dick. and i’ll b damn if since she told me that, i didnt catch more than a couple of questionable muhfuckas poutin with they lips stuck in the same “i been suckin dick all night to get u this money, daddy” position.

      i fux wit u Herbz…

  • 1stclass937

    How can he say drakes music is waterd dwn or sugary or wat ever, he called it pop!!!am I the only 1 that think drake is a more raw thugged common type.like a poetic rapper wit swagger wat pop music u kno use metaphors like drake.if drake is pop wat is common

  • Mutada al sader the king

    Why the big conspiracy theory? Who gives a fuck if someone pushed the button on his song? Isn’t that the fucking goal? Wouldn’t all of the washed up Sounclick/Myspacers who troll the “internets”, love for that to happen to them? I guess all the Jews in the industry huddled up in Tel Aviv somewhere, and picked the next MC out of a line up while enjoying falafels and Matzah balls. Yea, it had nothing to do with the fact that his mix tapes were garnering attention long before the blogs and “hip hop websites”, picked up on him.

    The tearing down of another MC begins. Now I guess its time to give him the AsherEM, HAM treatment right? I don’t get it. I could see if dude came out on some gangster shit, on some hood shit and got exposed. From what I’ve seen and heard the dudes been pretty honest about his past, and does not carry himself or speak like he’s from “the hood”. On top of that, why does the “hood” have to be a measure of hip hop authenticity? Do you know how many kids listen to and buy hip hop, who have only heard of “the hood” via their favorite MC, or a Menace to Society rerun on BET? And why call the nigga gay? What evidence do you have? Oh, because he does not speak with broken English, or maybe it’s because he’s “light skinned”. Maybe he should get arrested and build up a rap sheet. That would probably help him, with his “street cred” I’m not his biggest fan, yea some of his shit is strait Splenda/ saccharine, but come the fuck on man.

    PS
    Bloggers who post comments on their own blogs under pseudonyms are gay.

    • OG Matt Herbz

      Who does that? Spill it…

      • BIGNAT

        i wanna know

  • Mutada al sader the king

    I have some suspicions,we need to do a reveal your IP day, for real. Peace OMH

    • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grand$

      Roffle mayo.

  • geico lizard

    Drake had two fails in one week with that video pissing off black women and the BET kiddie friendly performance. He needs to work hard to get his buzz back. Reshoot the video with Bria Myles(fully clothed) as your love interest and then perform at the MTV awards. I hope my check is in the mail for this advice Drake.

    commission!!!

  • juliuscharle

    co-sign.its like who can we piggyback off of 2 make this kid “hot”. weezy. imagine if it was some1 else. he could be on grandhustle or wit jeezy. hip hop died in the womb…

  • capcobra

    isn’t this the same shit we went thru wit asher roth a few months ago?

    • Victor

      Forreal, Drake is Asher pt 2. But he defo has an even bigger buzz methinks. He’s on BP3 while Jay’s own roc nation signees cant get put on. Wale? J.Cole? So much for label favours.

  • $ykotic

    This just goes to show you that no matter how white you keep those kicks, with erasers or rags, they’re gonna get scuffed.

  • http://www.undabelly.blogspot.com FURY

    WTF r u going on about meng? This has got to be the most random blog posting I’ve ever read! And WTF is the 10 yr old bride (or bride metaphor) about?? man stop wasting out time and write about something real.

    SMH @Fucking bloggers get paid for bullshit

    Uno…

  • Dallas Penn

    Fury,
    Your blog sucks ass. XXL wouldn’t even consider having you intern up in this piece.

    Rapphags! Learn this one lesson if you learn nothing else…

    Emcees >>> Rappers

    Drake is a rapper.

    • $ykotic

      Preach on…

  • Ray

    I think his music is crap, but I’m 36 and think most rap ou now is crap. That said, it cracks me up that all these e-thugs login and start bashin the dude. All though I dislike his music, I’d rather see more pop rap rather than played out gangsta rap. I challenge some to name me a current rapper that can rap rap about biches, money, killing, drugs, etc. The industry took the music I helped launch and turned into self destructive, demeaning garbage.

  • El Tico Loco

    I called it a few weeks back, didn’t I? Gangsta rap may be dated but douchebag rap?

  • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grand$

    I see Drake as the same Frankenstein’s monster that the industry has been releasing upon us [||] since the 50′s. But, I don’t see this one breaking out of the lab & terrorizing town-folk. Even still, hide your teenage daughter’s y’all. Between him & R. Kelly, Prom’s will have to start providing child care services.

    Very rarely do we come across a home grown product that just dazzles it’s beholders. & those who do naturally exude such talent aren’t shoved down our throats in this manner. Granted, they don’t get the same level of notoriety, but maybe that’s for good reason.

    I guess I’d dislike dude much more if he were proclaiming to be the best or committing some idiotic campaign of world domination. As long as he stays away from the Art, & adheres to the flimsy end of half-assed R&B/hip pop shitburger, he can do what he chooses.

    The ladies like him, even though he looks like Earthworm Jim to me. So be it.

    Just wait. When he teams up with T-Pain & Akon (which we all know WILL happen), its going to be a (w)rap. He is the *dry heaves* future.

  • Teddy

    hi hater

    • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com Tony Grand$

      ^^^^
      That’s the best you can come up with.

      Hi back @ you, duck sauce.

  • Pablo

    No one even cares that he’s an immigrant either.

    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

    WTF what are you trying to say with this. Immigrants i’m from Canada from Latino ascendants and proud of it. So IMMIGRANT damn man that’s some corny ass comment.

    Dallas Penn stick to your video blogs and your writing is way low from average.

    and you can thank all the immigrants that like Hip Hop as a culture, that’s what happens when rappers are too busy doing wack ass music and labels functioning on payola. Yes an immigrant is the US no1 Rapper, stupid ass.

  • http://www.yahoo.com Dra$t-iQ Alkoholik

    O G HERBZ! Nigga you a legend,had a nigga rolling on the floor in fits of laughter.
    but on the reals though I aint fuckin ewith that Drake nigga, nigga be one of em manufactured talents if you ask me bet the muthafacka’s ghost writer is Baby’s baby, (if you catch my drift), sick of this emo-ass rap bull shit you know I aint gon trip but rap is the escape from this bitch-ass-nigganess world we live in and if we have pink-scarf-holding-tight-jeans-wearing-fags like Drake being callled the hottest thing in the game right now then you niggas got dicks stuck up your asses too. Call me a hater see if I give a fuck I be speaking the truth, this Canadian ass faggot who was on sum gay ass surburbian Tv show as a youth now trynna switch shit and say he Geeed, coz he lies to bitches to get ass well fuck that!I dont play that bitches know how a nigga roll and if you don’t believe me holla at em whores here in the J-Sec, they know how a nigga roll but if I see anyone or hear anyone bumping that Drake shit am sticking my size 13 air force one’s up theor ass!

  • Joey capp

    Can I ask something here? Who gives a fuck? Seriously, no offense DP but who gives a shit if a pop rapper is getting the hook ups from Lil Wayne? At least he’s not hurting hip hop like Soulja Boy or the guy from D4L? He’s not insulting his race or ethnicity or anything like that. He’s just making some pop rap for the girls to shake there booty to.

    While I’m almost definetly not planning to pick up his album I will admit he’s made a pretty catchy song

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