Pretty Ricky… Come Get Your Man!
I have no words… Well, I guess I have to have some words if I expect to be paid and shit.
Pretty Ricky was my bread and butter bottom bitch a few years ago. Back on June 1, 2005–damn near four years ago exactly–I gave the following prophecy.
“I expect to see at least 2 of Pretty Ricky’s members on America’s Most Wanted in a few years after Pleasure [P] wises up and takes his prison-bitch act solo.” –Ron Mexico, SOHH.com Talkin’ Videos
Since this edict, Pleasure P has gone solo with his hoery. His replacement, Ambition AKA 4 Play has since been ousted from the band and their current lead sanger’s name is… wait for it… Lingerie.
I get it. Lingerie, ‘cuz he be barely on a lady’s ass?
[Blogger’s Note: They should have named the nigga “Lawn Jerray”!]
In what was like my second or third blog ever, I knew I was more than just cutting my teeth when tearing into these boys. No nullus. While I had no idea they were going to take millions of dollars in pre-teen girl allowance, I knew shit would eventually get this bad for Pretty Ricky.
For their sake, I hope this was just a group decision to sacrifice one man. While Pretty Ricky has always been a joke, I don’t see how they could have thought that any good would come from throwing their brother under the bus like this. I’m quite sure they’ve lost band members over less.
While I don’t understand why Spectacular thinks even chicks want to see him air hump in Eddie Murphy: Delirious pre-game drawers, I do realize why he never changed his homoerotic name. The plan has obviously always been to nail down the lunch shift at The Tool Box [or, insert generic man dance club name here].
The fucked up part is, their father is behind all of this. My daddy would have whooped my ass if he knew I had any intention on ethering myself this way. These niggas’ pops is editing this shit like, “Yeah. Pop that mussy [man pussy] a little harder… Do it more gracefully. I want Beyonce! No, wait… I want Solange! Solange that pelvis for me, Spec’.”
Even more fucked up is that this shit is a challenge to Bow Wow, Chris Brown, Omarion, Trey Songz and whatever other lame or washed-up tween non-idols he can come up with off the top of the head. It’s not even for the ladies! He’s not only promoting the new single. As you read this he’s refreshing World Star in hopes of a response!
I thought these niggas issued video game challenges. This grind-off shit is a new low.
Stage 2 of the Pretty Ricky downturn is coming soon. Pre-teen girls can’t afford to get this shit AND Drake these days. Check them old blogs. Negrodamus hasn’t missed a prediction yet. Ask LeBron James. All these niggas career “projectories” are securely on course.
Questions? Comments? Requests? Gonna grind on him? firstname.lastname@example.org
A Pretty Ricky blog on XXL! They said it couldn’t happen! I make miracles every got damn day, bitches.