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In celebration of XXL’s “I Know Rap People” [The White Edition] (peep it on Thursday, May 7 baby – Matt Barone and I do our thing) I decided to concentrate on a special brand of honkey (or should I say “hungkey” like Rick Ross). My people – the chosen ones.

You see, the Jews be running this white rap ish. And I’m not talking behind the scenes either – shout out to the T.I.s. – that’s Bol’s lane – I’m talking ’bout the music.

From the dawn of white boy rap – it took three Jews from New York to set it off. The Beastie Boys, not only repped for the peckerwoods, but they also made sure to reference their dreidel playing, matzoh ball eating roots. “I’m a funky ass Jew and I’m on my way.”

Fast forward a couple years and the next rapper to get put on by pro-semite Russell Simmons and his Def Jam Records was the jewfro sporting MC Serch of 3rd Bass. Probably more known now for his role in ego trip’s [white] Rapper Show and Miss Rap Supreme, Serch helped form Non Phixion, one of the illest jewish super groups of all time. While member Sabac Red was half Italian/ half Puerto Rock, the rest of the group were a bunch of tough jews (werd to Scott Storch) from Brooklyn’s Glenwood projects. Member Ill Bill’s brother, Necro, a rapper in his own right, produced many of the crew’s songs, which came out on Bill’s Uncle Howie Records – whose logo payed homage to Hebrew National.

On the West Coast, a man by the name of Alan Daniel Maman, aka Beverly Hills’ gulliest, bearded producer, The Alchemist was holding it down for both the Infamous Mobb and the Kosher Tribe. (Actor Scott Caan, his Whooligans rap partner and son of legendary actor James Caan, is also down with the squad).

Up top in the T. Dot, everyone from the teenie boppers to Funk Flex to Joe Budden are getting their panties wet over self described halfie, Drake.

And in the Midwest, Jew manager extraordinaire Paul Rosenberg once said that the King of the white rappers, Mr. Slim Shady himself has a grandma out there somewhere who is half-Jewish. Add suburban sensation Asher Roth to the mix – he has one Jewish parent as well, although he was raised Christian – and you almost have one more full-time jew for the lineup.

I don’t really have to name anyone else, but just to shove the point down some of y’all throats – kosher pause – Atlanta newcomer OJ the Juiceman has a new nickname. Yes! OJ The Jew Man.

As Jackpot always says, speak on it. And try not to be too much of a “racialist” people. – Jesse Gissen

Bonus # 1– Rappin’ Rodney Dangerfield, born Jacob Cohen, always gets respect in my book.

Bonus #2– Shouts to Ralph Lipshitz, aka Ralph Lauren – we styling on you!


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