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BLOG: Rick Ross Won

I was watching that video where Rick Ross calls Eminem a honky, and I thought to myself, This guy must be living it up. I can only imagine how many crab meats he’s consumed in the past week.

As a matter of fact, I’m not sure if you can get iodine poisoning from eating crab meats, or if that’s just shrimp, but Rawse might want to consult a medical professional. I know most seafood these days has got a lot of mercury in it, and that’s not good for you either. Rawse might be in luck though, since he’s so big. At least once a week, I do something that would probably kill a child or a woman, and I’m as healthy as a horse – not so much as a drip!

I joked about this the other day on Twitter, but every time I blog about Rawse, I really do get a craving for crab meats. Because I blog for a living, I’ve had nary a crab meat since I had some at my parents’ house for New Years, a few years ago. Later on today, I’m gonna be buying my own house, so I might have to cop some crab meats and some J. Roget, to celebrate. Only thing is, I’ve been having to write way more checks than I thought. So I might have to wait until next week, just to see what I have left, if anything.

Rawse, on the other hand, doesn’t have to worry. He’s probably got more money than he’s even capable of spending, which is not to say that he’s got that much money. It’s just, what is he’s gonna buy? In this new video, he’s showing off his pair of Kanye West’s ridonkulous Nikes, which look like some shit out of the second Back to the Future. As if we’re supposed to be impressed by a pair of tennis shoes. Even the brokest of black people somehow come up with a way to buy expensive tennis shoes.

Maybe that was just his way of taunting Fiddy. Fiddy spent all spring taunting Rawse, but it doesn’t seem to have had much of an effect on Rawse’s album sales. The general consensus leading up to the release of Deeper Than Rap was that Fiddy pwned Rawse about as bad as a rapper could possibly be pwned, but Rawse’s album will sell anyway, because people like Rawse’s albums way more than they like Fiddy’s.

And people do seem to like Deeper Than Rap. I know a lot of people enjoyed those first couple of Rawse albums as a sort of guilty pleasure, but all of a sudden I’m hearing people talk about this new one as if it’s actually good. All I can think is that people must be especially hard up for good new rap music. Keep in mind, that new Jadakiss album sold 135,000 copies its first week out, and it’s a Jadakiss album. Like I said on Gawker the other day, the streets are hungry for bullshit. Someone get Fat Joe on the phone.

Now that Rawse has done his numbers, it’s his turn to play the bully. I doubt he can have any more of an effect of Fiddy’s album sales than Fiddy had on his, especially since Rawse isn’t as strong a comedian as Fiddy. But Rawse claims he’s done with Fiddy anyway. Instead he’s going at Fiddy’s boss, Eminem. Which could be hilarious. Eminem hasn’t seemed as eager to beef with anyone since he’s mounted his comeback. I was hoping he might go at Asher Roth, but I kinda figured that wouldn’t happen. Maybe we can get him to go at Rawse.

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