Rappers, Save Your Bullshit Mixtape Albums
You know what’s the lamest shit ever? When an artist puts out an album that isn’t any good, and then they claim it’s because that’s only the mixtape.
This occurred to me the other day, when I was reviewing the new album by Big Pooh, the other guy from Little Brother. I figured I’d check it out, since I do enjoy Little Brother (I thought that last album they put out was killer; 9th Wonder was obviously the weakest link – goodbye!), and since it had such a nice cover.
Also, I’d seen this video on Nah Right that was a preview of the video for the lead single, and it looked like there were gonna be some incredible women in it. Not that I keep track of these things, but I remember, a while back, Pooh had a video with a woman with some impressive cans. Big Pooh obviously has a keen eye for some pussy. Which might have to do with the fact that he’s the rapper that bears the strongest resemblence to yours truly. I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s spent a significant amount of time watching pr0n.
Of course, the album sucked balls. I probably shouldn’t have bothered reviewing it in the first place, what with it being a Big Pooh album and all. I like the guy just fine (no fishsticks) within the context of Little Brother, where he’s basically just filling up the space between Phonte’s verses, but even the very best Big Pooh album could only ever be so good. And the Delightful Bars isn’t Pooh’s best work. (I remember that one he had out back in like ’05 being way better.)
But come to find out the Delightful Bars isn’t an official Big Pooh album per se. It’s somewhere in between a mixtape, like that godawful Rapper’s Delight tape he had out last year or the year before (I think that’s where that one video was from), and a legit album. There might actually be another official Big Pooh, like that one he had out circa ’05, at some point or another. (Keep in mind, I was informed of this by the world’s one and only Big Pooh stan, and it might be entirely inaccurate.) Indeed, I was aware that the Delightful Bars is only available in iTunes, but I figured that was because there wasn’t a business case to print up any physical copies, as if Best Buy is gonna move any Killers albums aside to make room for that shit.
Fast forward a few weeks later. I’m listening to this interview with Camp Lo on the Friday Night Live Show, and they’re talking about the critical response to their new album, Stone & Rob: Caught on Tape. (Of course) they said it was mostly positive, but one of them said there was a blogger complaining about how it failed to live up to the level of Uptown Saturday Night. I figured he might have been talking about me, since I did a review of Stone & Rob, in which I complained that it wasn’t as good as Uptown Saturday Night (I know – the nerve!), but who knows. It could have just as easily been one of these relatively obscure hip-hop bloggers. Kevin Nottingham or somebody.
Then came the kicker: Stone & Rob isn’t supposed to be as good as Uptown Saturday Night, because it’s only a mixtape. The fact that the word “tape” is in the title should have been a dead giveaway. This despite the fact that Stone & Rob is listed in the Wiki, the world’s most accurate encyclopedia, along with the rest of their albums, and it even says it was released by a major label – some convoluted vanity subsidiary of Universal Records. How in the fuck was I supposed to know it wasn’t a real album? It’s not like any of these labels actually send me promos, with proper bios and what have you. I’d contact their publicity departments, but I’m pretty sure they know who I am at this point. There’s probably a memo going around with my name on it. As if that’s gonna do any good.
And anyway, why should I give a shit whether something is an official album, or a mixtape, or somewhere in between? I’m getting it from the same place, i.e. Rapidshare, regardless. And it’s not like I’m gonna be any more tolerant of bullshit, if I know it’s just some shit that’s been thrown together to keep an artist’s name hot in the streets, while they work on something that’s actually worthwhile. I could give a rat’s ass whether or not an artist’s name is hot in the streets.