Lil’ Kim, Queen of the Dead

Brian B.Dot Miller: Switching gears, you’ve been publicly unsupportive of Notorious. If Biggie were alive, do you think he would’ve been pleased with the film?

Lil’ Kim: I’m a very spiritual person and he’s come to me many of times in my dreams. But, I don’t think he’s happy at all, at all! Because Ms. Wallace doesn’t know Biggie at all and she barley knows Christopher, if you know what I mean. At all! And I was around. Even before he blew up so crazy, so I know how he felt about his mom. And Biggie was so much more than what they put him out to be in that movie. And to be honest with you, I know for a fact he’s not happy. He’s not satisfied at all. At all. And regardless of the fact, everybody who is involved in this movie, he has love for. Everybody. But at the end of the day, he knows who’s who and what’s what. Believe that. And let me tell you something, the way he’s feeling is going to come out. Like, trust me. Everything is going to come out later. You’re going to see who he really loved and the ones that’s standing up for him the right way is the ones representing him the right way.

BM: At this point, do you think he’d want you to reconcile with Lil’ Cease?

LK: I think after what Cease did, no. I’m going to tell you what my spiritual connection from Biggie is telling me, “Don’t look back, just do you” and that’s why my success is right here for me. I’m moving in a very positive direction, I don’t care what nobody say. They can have all the negativity and all the bull. Biggie said “Don’t look back. Forget Cease, forget all of them because they going to be sorry. Cause what they did was wrong” and he knows it. -Excerpt from interview on RapRadar.com

“I had a dream,” she said. “’Bout what,” I said. “’Bout B.I.G.,” she said. “That’s big,” I said.

I could have sworn we’d gotten this routine before at the beginning of another Biggie hanger-on’s album. Damn. If only I could remember the rapster… or the name of that LP… A sequel of some kind, I think.

So, Lil’ Kim has not only been dip’d by the ankle into a mythical river of plastic and silicone, but she’s also been granted clairvoyance by the Laconian demigod Persephone. Obviously, with her new-found gift, she turns to the most insightful entity possible.

You’re not alone in wondering how long the Queen Bee’s been communicating with The Notorious One and on what other important matters she’s been advised. As soon as I discovered that Kimmy had otherworldly connections, I pondered where along the line Biggie counseled Ms. Jones on the following matters:

-Carving at her own face, creating a human crack-o-lantern.

-Collaborating with and fucking Ray-J

-Woefully mishandling covering for a homie under oath

-Turning Japanese

The gods—clearly having given Biggie the power to communicate with the living, as exhibited by Kim’s account and Jay-Z’s catalogue—must be equally crazy. This is why we have atheists. We could be getting all kinds of wonderful insight from the beyond, yet all we get is the word of Biggie Smalls from unlikely prophet, Blonde the Baptist. Thanks.

Oh, yeah! Blueprint 2! That was it! Damn. I almost forgot.

[Blogger’s Note: That shit would have been ONE really good CD. “Meet The Parents” = that schidt!]

What Kim needs to do is knock Dionne Warwick and Miss Cleo out the fuckin box and get that hotline poppin. She can’t be the only motherfucker out there who wants to holler at B-I. She could sell more texts than them KING model phone wallpapers. Buffie and them don’t stand a chance.

That is, if her spiritual counsel didn’t more likely come from… the drugs, baby.

Questions? Comments? Requests? Still love her like a liiiiine… or the ganja?
ron@ronmexicocity.com

P.S.: I wanna know who’s talking to Tupac, besides the engineer at Afeni Records.

  • Pierzy

    What’s good Mr. Mex?

    I wish I could forget Blueprint 2…although I must co-sign that “Meet The Parents” is an amazing cut. Being able to forget that album would be fantastic.

  • the r

    blueprint 2….so many good songs and so many BAD ones….ballad of a fallen soldier, most underrated jay-z neptunes collabo

  • mo

    I can’t call it homie. I just remeber seeing the scene at BIG’s coffin tour through brooklyn where Lil Kim is going insane and crying her eyes out on mary j’s shoulder. Sad shit, and unfortunately the whole BIG murder fucked her up mentally as it would with anyone you’re close to.

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      talking to biggie? biggie talking back?

      come on, money.

      we all lose people close to us, but that shit’s a step beyond. i don’t wanna belittle her grief, but damn… and then to discuss it publicly like that… i dunno, mane. the timing seems kinda perfect to go shirley maclaine on us.

  • OG Matt Herbz

    It would have been a good question to ask Kim how Big would have felt about that plastic surgery, like: “Do you think B.I.G. would even recognize you anymore…you know, like, in person?” then “Would B.I.G. still be able to tear into your ass without something falling or rubbing off or bursting or some shit?”

    Kim’s a straight joke. A shame that I never got the goods when the gettin’ was good, nahmean?! Nowadays, I wouldn’t fuck that bitch with TPAR’s dick.

    –OG Matt Herbz–

  • $ykotic

    “The gods—clearly having given Biggie the power to communicate with the living, as exhibited by Kim’s account and Jay-Z’s catalogue….”

    Church!

    • Dub Sac

      Ohh, burn!

  • http://xxlmag.com slim

    that bitch crazy! hahahahaha

  • amar

    biggie must’ve told kim to be a judge on that new pussycat dolls show. Girlicious must be the reincarnation of biggie. Shit, if i was reincarnated, i’d wanna be 4 hot young barely legal chicks too!

  • geico lizard

    “This is why we have atheists. We could be getting all kinds of wonderful insight from the beyond”

    ^
    I have to co-sign that Ron because the dead could at least give me the winning lottery numbers. Atheists are also born because of these pimp preachers who know we are in a recession but they keep asking for more money so they can pray to God for you and bless you,smh.

  • http://tonygrands.blogspot.com tony grand$

    Mex, I’ll tell you who Pac is talking to. Every conspiracy theory filled, rebellious youth born after he died.

  • Lowedwn

    damn, damn, daaaaaamn….can we get a small moment of silence for the woman who graced the “Hardcore” album cover….now can we get pettion to tell her Micahel jackson-esque-Lord of the Rings-Deformed-Gollum looking counter-part that we miss the Real Queen Bee.

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      *waving church fan*

      WELLL!!!

    • BIGNAT

      OH SHIT LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Hip Hop since 77

    @Lowedwn… CHURCH!!! The Real Queen Bee was a beast, that chick on Dancing With The Stars just looks like one.

  • http://www.MySpace.com/GrimeyHipHop Stan

    And Jay Zs catalogue…. Lol That’s cold…

  • c. gabi

    It must be hard losing your fuck buddy…especially when you refuse to believe that you were just a fuck buddy.

    • Michelle S.

      Ouch. LOL

  • http://1290wmcs.com “The Party Killa”

    The comments R on point…

    clairvoyance by the Laconian demigod Persephone

    ^^^MEX U almost lost me for a minute wit my slooooow ass…LMAO great post as usual.

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      i know i damn well i ain’t lose you. you got that. you got that.

  • chillin mayne

    christopher continually clarifies circumstances dat could crystalize in my future….i talk to him every day… biggieeeeee, HOW are i gonna do it??

  • chillin mayne

    i talk to chris every day… biggieeeeee, HOW are i gonna do it??

  • Beast McCoy

    The C.O.s at her prison [not to mention the inmates] must have done a number on her because she is out of her damn mind. Well I guess she met some butt-ugly cockeyed fat dyke named Chris and she just laid her head on her shoulder while “watching” dancing with stars and pretended that chick was Biggie. Dedication or Obsession?

    • geico lizard

      “Well I guess she met some butt-ugly cockeyed fat dyke”
      ^
      You are wrong for saying that about Da Brat,roffle

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com ron mexico

      damn. the hate is strong with you, young beast.

  • DANJA29

    Hey- I wouldn’t doubt Kim. He spoke to Jay in a dream before, and I know you remember when Puffy Woods was havin’ some trouble on the 17th hole and B.I. came from up above and talked to him.