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Entering a world of pain

You guys know I don’t really follow sports like that. When somebody told me, yesterday, that Eddie Curry’s baby mother and her kid had been killed, I thought they were talking about the ninja from Family Matters.

Turns out it was that same guy from the New York Knicks who’d been accused of sexually harassing his limo driver, whom I’m only familiar with because that had been discussed on the Howard Stern Show.

It was only when I read, just now, that this took place in Chicago that I put 1 and 2 together. Could this be yet another case of a black celebrity from Chicago being extorted by the awful gangs there?

Keep in mind that this is all speculation. I hardly know anything about this case. And I couldn’t pick Eddie Curry out of a lineup, unless the rest of the people in the lineup were mad short and/or white. I only read about this shit over at Sandra Rose, and they’re only running a picture of the condo where it took place.

But I do happen to know that there’s been a lot of rumors and speculation over the years re: celebs from the Chi being extorted by gangs there. I’ve received emails informing me that Lupe Fiasco used to run heroin for them; that, when Kanye got his face all busted up, as seen in the “Through the Wire” video, it wasn’t from the car wreck he was in, but rather from a beatdown he received from them; and that they were somehow involved in that case where that pharmaceutical rep went missing, which I know involved another basketball player I’m not as familiar with.

And there’s a striking similarity between the killings this weekend, and the killing of Jennifer Hudson’s family, which also took place in the Chi, and which I also speculated may have had something to do with the gang problem there. Hmm…

The Jennifer Hudson case I’m actually not as certain about. It could be that it was just a matter of the guy her sister was dating having spent time in the joint and having emerged kinda batty, a la Saigon. (But not that kind of batty, I think…) You know her sister suffers from weight issues, even relative to Jennifer Hudson herself, and hence is more likely to take up with an ex-con. (If only there was a such thing as an attractive girl ex-con.) You ever go to a Wal-Mart on a Saturday afternoon, see a 600 pound woman with a baby, and wonder how that happened? I rest on your face.

I wouldn’t be surprised if the Eddie Curry case, meanwhile, was a matter of plain ol’ extortion. Two dead giveaways:

1) They killed the girl and her baby, but they let Eddie Curry’s son live. He was found standing over his dead mother trying to wake her up. Which reminded me of some of the back story from the show Dexter[1]. If this was the case of a psycho ex-con flipping out on his low expectations babymama, he probably would have killed Eddie Curry’s son, too. The fact that they let the boy live lets me know this was just a warning. Curry’s still got time to come up with the money, before they kill someone who’s actually close to him. (The fact that his son might grow up to be a closet case serial killer is just collateral damage.) If anything, they might have done him a favor by offing his baby’s mother. I know it’s insensitive to say, especially at a time like this, but think of how much money he’s gonna save now that he’s only got a son to support, and not the poor kid’s mother, and her other kid, and the ex-con she’s supporting, and so on and so forth.

2) How in the fuck is some shit like this gonna happen to Eddie Curry a mere matter of days after he was accused of sexually harassing his limo driver? That limo driver shit reeked to me of extortion even before his baby’s mother turned up dead with his son standing over her. I just figured it was a matter of the limo driver trying to pull a fast one, aware of how much money he could make from one of these ball players, who can’t afford to be viewed as a fudge. (Sandra Rose had a picture the other day of a couple of NBA dudes who looked pretty moist, which would lead me to believe this problem is pretty widespread.) And I thought he might have also been a racist, at least on a subconscious level, and that this might have had something to do with the inauguration. I should have known this went way deeper than that. Think about it: If he’s white, and he’s that smart, what was he doing blogging driving a limo for a living?

What do you fruits think? Is Eddie Curry being extorted, or am I reading too much into this? If he is, should he go ahead and pay up, since they took care of his baby’s mother for him? Or should he go to the cops and reveal to them what’s been obvious to me for some time now? Or would that constitute snitching? Speak on it.

[1] Did you know that the guy who plays Dexter is married to the girl who plays his sister on the show, i.e. like the fifth most attractive woman evar? I’m not sure if I’m gonna be able to watch that show anymore.

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