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50 Cent Turns Attention to Nas, Ignores Own Sinking Ship

It’s so cold in the Queens.

“Man, Nas is cold as ice. Nas is the block of ice that sunk the Titanic… I think he’s at one of those points to where his career’s finished, to be honest. He’s had some great moments and made good music in the past, but he no longer has the interest of the general public or myself.”50 Cent, XXL Magazine

Well if that ain’t the pot calling the kettle “Nigger,” Curtis.

While Nas may be at the tail end of a long and storied career–with albums in the middle we’ll pretend didn’t happen (like Jay)–50’s Congo mystique has already clearly run out. Terminate Our Shit is the hands down winner of the 2008 Grammy in the “Most Violently Ignored” category. As per the repeated delays in Before I Embarrass Myself’s release, market projections clearly indicate that Cincuenta Centavo is going to have some trouble moving his frisbees this go ’round.

“Get Up” sits “In Da Club” bitches down faster than explosive diarrhea. I seent it. Throw on that new 50 and it’s like every chick at the party instantaneously has to take a “Jim” at the same time.

[Blogger’s Note: Thank you, eddiesixes!]

I remember a certain hasenfeffer-toothed primate once having advised not to “throw stones if you live in a glass house.” Now may be the time for Amy Good Gorilla to take her own sign-language advice. For one, we can all see 50’s ass right now. Secondly, a nice-sized rock would be better used keeping the wobbly Lazy Boy Tony Yayo sleeps in from toppling over… that being, if he doesn’t try to sell it first.

Yayo would probably try to push the shit right out front of the Danbury mansion. That institutionalized-ass nigga don’t know where he is half the time anyway.

As far as the interest of the non-crack-purchasing public goes, if 50 has their interest, it’s clearly not for musical reasons. I heard dude’s supposed to be getting DeNiro’s coffee in a few upcoming crime dramas. That’s cool. I’m also aware that 50 has been named Val Kilmer’s official Bagger Vance.

“I’m right here witcha, Cap’n Boss. Been here all along.”

We at Ron Mexico City congratulate Mr. Jackson on the promotion.

The Legend of Nigger Curtis. Hmmm. I like it.

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with making sure that your money’s nice and long in preparation for life after rapstering. Sometimes niggas just need reminders of where they’re headed. Make no mistake. Before I Self-Destruct is the aptly-titled swan song of a rapper who stirred up shit with the best of them for a strong 5-year mainstream run.

I just don’t think bleeding on the prison shower floor is really the place from which to make fun of another nigga’s status.

Time to get that end-game money. I hear retired players do well as analysts sometimes.

Questions? Comments? Requests? Cover your eyes. This blog will self-destruct.

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