Welcome back to ESDN First Hate. I’m Ron Mexico.
I’m not allowed any more female co-hosts. I also have to watch this sensitivity training video narrated by Chris Berman and Harold Reynolds.
I see how it is. When Berman does it it’s cute…
Anyway, we’re down to our final two SDNs. Here’s how last round went down:
#8 Diddy (72.9%) def. #10 Karrine “Superhead” Steffans (27.1%)
#14 R. Kelly (61.9%) def. #4 DMX (38.1%)
Much props to Superhead. She took this tournament by the balls and got to jugglin! She took out The RZA and Plies. Applaud this woman! Diddy simply had far too much momentum going to him to take that L.
SDN Tournament Championship Match
#8 Diddy vs. #14 R. Kelly
If Diddy wins it all, we have to name Diddy Blog the tournament MVP. Them shits catapulted Puff from a potential first-round K.O. at the hands of one Dirt McGirt to one of the last two standing. He also had ZERO easy rounds. Having taken out O.D.B., Kanye West, Lil’ Wayne and Cinderhead (the George Mason of this shit), Diddy’s a winner no matter how this plays out.
R. Kelly’s rout of preseason favorite DMX makes him a little more likely to take Diddy in a close one. He also showed Flavor Flav and the vile rapper Naaaaahs (the posterchild) ass-early exits as well. The songwriting genius combined with illiteracy, inability to articulate himself and unwavering devotion to publicly enjoying the pre-teen muffin top may be a little too much for your religious XXL/Ron Mexico City reader to ignore.
Today’s Negro Please Bonus goes to a former teammate of mine at Big Green. Yes, we all respect his bloggety blog grind. T.I. can claim to be Kang of the South all he wants. However, even he knows that whosoever controls the shine box also controls these solar-powered rapsters. In Atlanta, that man goes by SOHH Gyant… Shawty.
Shit often goes terribly wrong when bloggers step from behind the desk seeking “shine” of their own. Sometimes niggas get things tatted on them they damn well know they shouldn’t. Gyant gives the Negro Please reader the best of both blunders.
Who the fuck gets a tattoo of a keyboard on their arm? It’s been 10 years since “4-3-2-1″ and the subsequent Canibus/LL Cool J/Wyclef/Mike Tyson fallout. I can assure you that all parties involved sporting microphone tattoos fully regret their engravings by now. Some of them are even trying to cover up with Old Spice Swagger.
It doesn’t make sense to be getting your arms tattooed while carrying an entire website. Anything for a blog, though. Right?
Questions? Comments? Requests? Still considering getting that 20-sided die tattoo on the left shoulder? email@example.com