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Say it ain’t so, Will Smith!

One of the few blind items I was able to recognize in that DL hip-hop book was Will Smith.

I think the part about him mentioned something like, “This guy is one of the biggest actors in the world, but before that, he was on a TV series, and before that, he was a rapper.”

Clearly, that had to be Will Smith, right? I mean, there’s only so many black guys you could say are among the biggest actors in the world. And once you control for guys who used to be rappers, that pretty much just leaves Will Smith and Ice Cube. And obviously it can’t be Ice Cube.

(I don’t care how many of those god-awful kids movies he does, I refuse to believe Ice Cube fucks other guys. Definitely not for free, he doesn’t.)

But I didn’t think too much of it at the time, I guess because you don’t really think of Will Smith as being a rapper the same way you think of other guys. Yeah, he was a rapper before he was an actor. But it’s been such a long time since he was relevant in the least bit. There’s probably kids these days who don’t even know Will Smith used to be a rapper. After all, it’s been over 10 years since Big Willie Style.

No, really. Do the math.

Plus, Will Smith never really put forth that image of being an alpha. I never would have guessed for a minute that he fucks guys, but it’s not like he was kicking rhymes detailing his conquests with the ladies. In retrospect, this might have been our first clue. Will Smith has been balling for a minute now. We probably should have heard more stories about him getting busy than we have.

Shit, once I start getting it in with these hoes, that’s all you’re gonna hear is tales of Bol’s cock. We might even have to set up a new blog on this site to contain all of them. Or, at least a separate category. It’s a good that’s mostly just a whole lot of wishful thinking, and that’s probably all it’s ever gonna be.

But I digress.

In case you fruits haven’t heard, there’s a rumor going around that Will Smith used to cop male hookers from one of these Hollywood madam types. She recently relocated from LA to New York, where she told this to a guy who’s supposedly an investigative journalist.

I tried to check the guy’s site, but I couldn’t connect. I don’t know if the site’s just down right now, due to the overwhelming amount of interest in Will Smith’s teh gheyness, or if Big Willie sicced the junkyard dog on him.

I wouldn’t be surprised, though, if it was the latter. Will Smith’s a $cientologist now, and you know those $cientologists don’t play when it comes to legal issues. Remember that time when Will Smith told that journalist that Hitler wasn’t a bad guy, he was just confused, and then he turned around and sued the guy for quoting him as saying some shit he actually said? I’m pretty sure he won that case.

It makes you wonder if this occurred to the madam, before she went public with this. You’d think the guy would have known better, since he’s an investigative journalist, and who hasn’t heard of the Church of $cientology’s strong arm tactics these days? Maybe he did, and he’s not sweating it, because he’s got some sort of paper trail.

He’d kinda have to, right? Otherwise, this rumor wouldn’t hold any more weight than any ol’ fudge on the street saying he used to fuck Will Smith. Meanwhile, I’m seeing this being blasted across all sorts of mainstream media outlets. Even if it isn’t true, I’d say there’s already been a considerable amount of damage done.

Will Smith better hope Elron and his crew can put the kibosh on this. Or else, he might want to see about getting his money back.

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