Is It Daddy Yankee’s Birthday?

I read this article about Daddy Yankee moderating some debate in Mexico, or wherever Puerto Ricans come from, and the following day, no lie, I saw like a dozen Mexicans laid out in the street drunk. The weather has been pretty nice during the day but nighttime has been getting brick. I figured these dudes were all getting twisted because of Daddy Yankee.

The talk has been that Daddy Yankee was getting amnesty for all the day laborers and the delivery men without citizen status. You know how the U.S. likes to keep immigrants always in fear that their ass might get deported or some shit if they get too uppity. Immigrants keep their mouths shut in general because of this. But now, thanks to Daddy Yankee a lot of Mexicans are feeling like they can speak their minds now.

I have fucked with Mexicans for the longest time. They have the best beer – Negro Modelo. They have the best food – bandeja paisa. And they have the hottest broad in the game – America Ferrara. Let’s never forget to speak the names of Daisy Fuentes and Salma Hayek either. For the next presidential election cycle I expect to see a Mexican running for either major party. Maybe this was why the Mexicans were all laid out on the sidewalk. They had O.D.’d while celebrating the notion of their socio-political emancipation. I can definitely relate to that.

It turns out that it was Dia del Cristofo Colom yesterday. So all the Mexicans were getting drunk in honor of that dude. It made sense to me since Mexicans love Spain more than themselves. Fools were tore up from the floor up too. What I will never understand is how Mexicans manage to get so effed the eff up from those tiny little cans of Budweiser. I need about four tall boys of Bud to even feel buzzed. [ll] to drinking tall boys.

The relationship that people have with their colonizers is always interesting to me. The folks in Barbados were British-loving to a fault. People living in the U.K. don’t romanticize their country as much as the Bajans do. Nevermind that these dudes were one of the colonies that Britain disenfranchised early they still love that place liked cooked food. Everyone in school or work there dresses like a goddamned bobby.

I’m glad that Mexicans love Columbus though. No particular reason. Just glad.

* OH SHIT! UPDATE * OH SHIT! UPDATE *

R.I.P. GIDGET GEIN

  • ri067953

    Yo Billy, you fucks with that Modelo Negra too? That is my shit, I will never go back to drinking any other mexican beer.

  • http://xxlmag.com Billy X. Sunday

    ^^ Best. Beer. Evar!

  • ri067953

    Yo Billy, you got it fucked up though. Don’t you know Mexicans stay drunk all day everyday? I’m Mexican and I come from a long line of heavy drinkers. For some reason, it is embedded in our bloodline. Also, Bill Richardson is a Mexican-American who ran for the Democratic nomination this year, so we have already arrived baby! And as far as us celebrating Coloumbus Day, that has never been a tradition that I know of. You must be confusing us with all those spics that live in New York, homie.

  • http://www.prettypancakes.com amar

    don’t forget having the best goddamn strippers with the best goddamn asses and the best goddamn lap dances EVAR

    i’ll take a fine-ass mexican stripper over a negro model[o] any day ;-) (unless she’s tyrah banks or one of those swimsuit booty models on kanye’s blog)

    http://www.prettypancakes.com

  • http://www.prettypancakes.com amar

    correction: actually most of the finest strippers in mexico are venezuellan or argentinian or some shit. But they work in mexico, so let’s call them mexican for the time being.

    http://www.pretypancakes.com

  • KF UK

    lacey duvalle > ugly betty

  • EReal

    Selma H > Fatty Ferrara

    ALL DAY ERRY DAY!

    Argentinian Chicks > Mexican Chicks.

    All the mexican chicks that I’ve seen look 1/2 retarded in the face and are fat as all hell. I dont think I’ve ever seen a hot ass MEXICAN chick on the streets. Beauty Pagent maybe.

    Shouts to my people in Mar Del Plata, Argentia, Dave, Chris, Matti the Mongrel and Baby Goriyya aka Alex.
    THERE IT IS!

    • 619

      You don’t think you’ve ever seen a hot ass Mexican chick on the streets, where the fuck do you live? Must be on the East Coast or something, because California got Mexican broads for days that’ll have you stuck, like let me get my best game together to try to pull this one! I feel sorry for you, really you should hop on a plane and go to South Cali, so you could see some real Mexican females, because they’re the finest ones out here.

      • EReal

        You hit the nail homie, I am from the East Coast. Notice I didn’t say there werent hot mexicanas, only that they are rare and elusive creatures, at least in my neck of the woods.
        Yall know the ones Im talkin bout, but I’ve always felt that Colombia and Argentina were the best of South America.
        Its all prefrence.

  • 619

    Billy’s confused as fuck, hahaha! Your in New York, you don’t have hardly any Mexicans. And all the Mexicans I know hate Columbus and I’m in South Klackifornia, this shit is like Mexican central out here. Do your history, he landed in the wrong spot, and killed off a bunch off Indians. Indian tribes in Mexico were all killed off by Spanish colonizers. Mexicans take pride in their Indian heritage.

  • Simple like ABC, 123

    Latin Girls > Modelo Negra > Obama-Biden > Cristofo Colom > Puerto Rican > Mexican > Daddy Yankee > McCain-Palin

  • Simple like ABC, 123

    Fuck Daddy Yankee’s birthday!!! hahaha!!!

    • EReal

      +1!

  • akaTheRealist

    Daisy Fuentes is Cuban..but she could get it nonetheless. And, the general consensus among men of any race, age, or eight, is that Brazil/Brasil has the baddest.bitches.evar. Point.blank.periid. like T.I. say..

  • yoprince

    mexican chicks?? really?? well, at least not where i’m from or been.

    in fact i be feelin sorry for mexican dudes, cause i used to see em out with their chicks in the food lion (b4 i started gettin that foods of all nations money) sometimes lookin like they’d strangle their own baby for some of the white stank walkin around..

  • victoria valdez

    Hi Daddy Yankee Happy 4th of July my birthday Feb 16 1994 I love You and Music P.S You are Sexy and Hot Can you Call Me 686-8581 or 664-6453 i have call you Victoria Olivia Valdez what is are Birthday is Feb you are HOT and SEXY CALL ME I LOVE YOU DADDY YANKEE