Billy X. Sunday Stays On The Sauce…

So here I was at this Obama rally party thrown by the Sauce mag and Hu$tle $immon$ (the real one) and who taps my shoulder but the homey Jackpot who reminds me that I am behind in my drops here at the X spot. Say what you want about dude, but even when fools is in party mode he still has work on his mind. So here I am getting back at y’all now that I am back in my parent’s basement.

One thing I can say is that Harris Publ. throws better parties than the Sauce. I went to a King mag jumpoff last week and it was in a fly little spot featuring art and free cognac. Sauce’s joint was all crowded with D-list Hip-Hop glitterati like Ice T and his buxom broad, plus Lil’ Bow Wow. Sonn claims he is 21. I laughed knowing damn well his ass is 35. Bow Wow got that shit the nigga Webster had where you stop growing at 8 yrs old. The free hooch at the Sauce party was that bullshit Nuvo. I know I threw that shit under the bus before, but when it is free I go in crazy.

The chicks at the Sauce party were actually friendlier than the birds at the Harris party. I think that is because the Sauce staffers are mosty hoodrats who like to have a good time while the chicks that work at King magazine are mostly men-haters. Not all of them, but most of them. Who can blame them though. Every month they have to photoshop the skidmarks from off some chick’s asscrack. King magazine is actually the classy Black ass newsstand rag. Some of the shit I see needs to be sitting on the shelf in a brown paper bag. Maxim and FHM never make their covers look so damn scandalous.

The sauce joint last night is part of this push that Obama supporters have been on to get people to come out and vote for this dude next Tuesday. I decided a few weeks ago that I would vote for Obama instead of Cynthia McKinney and I am still on the bandwagon although all this hype makes me a little suspect. Especially when Hu$tle $immon$ is so embedded in the movement. I need to stop hating on dude like that, but I swear I smell some fishy shit when he puts his hands on something. I made the night work for me as I established some contacts. Who knew bitches were into this political shit so heavy right now?

My advice to you humps that have a hard time sidling up to some tender sexy need to get familiar with the politricks. Tell some broad you are doing community organizing on the internets and you might could get yourself a date or some shit. I kissed a few chicks on the mouth behind that bullshit and if it worked for me then one of you meatbags should have enough game to get a score from it. the other fly shit about the Sauce party were the free magazines. The Sauce has some dope content in their latest issue but the mag looks damn near homemade. They were using stock pics for their articles that you find on the internets. Ha. Sauce failed on the quality of the paper as well.

XXL is still the top Hip-Hop mag on the newsstand and the pricepoint is also better than the Sauce. XXL costs me $3 on Court Street in Brooklyn while the Sauce is posted up at $5. Both mags keep it fairly edgy as far as their content is concerned. XXL is of course a little more mainstream, but both mags are the equivalent of commercial radio in print form. XXL broadcasts with more megahertz. The Sauce is back on some college radio shit. After I left the Sauce party I went to this James Brown x Fela Kuti shit to rub up on some patchouli chicks. Now it’s 5 in the morning and I am back home.

If you want to party as hardbody as your boy Billy X. Sunday you gonna need to copp you a bottle of caffeine pills.

  • OG Matt Herbz

    How many hoes you leave that joint with, Billy. I’m sure you got a few passed out with no pants-on on your sofa and shit. Now that they’re serviced you got time to blog, right?

    Because, shit, at 5am, I was snuggled up in between a couple Mexican Mamis that I met in Plaza Fiesta. You know, the thick-type ones that can ride the meat. (Geno, where you at, son?) But anyways, y’all might knock a nigga for going after ladies with a little extra skin, but trust me, nothing beats having something soft and pudgy to keep you warm at night. I mean, when we’re spooning, their asses straight envelope my crotch, you know, cradling my goods in a nice warm, brown package. I love me some Mexicanas, mang…if I weren’t born a White Nigga, I would most certainly wanna be a Latino Nigga.

    Peace to all y que tengan un dia lleno de sol y morenitas lindas… Ciao.

    –OG Matt Herbz–

    • http://www.prettypancakes.com amar

      hey matt herbz,

      just make sure you don’t chase the ones that jump at you outta a bush in packs of 3, saying “hi papi”. Those hoes most certainly pack more meat than you’d prefer, if you catch my drift. Those hoes aren’t packing the lamb roast…they got the salami instead.

      http://www.prettypancakes.com

  • P-Matik

    What are those parties like, yo? I never stepped in one like that in NYC unless the Wax Poetics parties count.

    BTW, tell Cynthia McKinney to get her a** back to Congress. I checked her “platform” out, it’s not even realistic. It’s a wasted vote IMO. She’d do more good in the Capitol, she can introduce bills there too.

  • internet thug slapper

    “plus Lil’ Bow Wow. Sonn claims he is 21. I laughed knowing damn well his ass is 35. Bow Wow got that shit the nigga Webster had where you stop growing at 8 yrs old.”

    BXS you wish you could rub up on some patchouli chicks….LMAO but that shit right there had me rollin’ good shit!

  • capcobra

    tipping your scales again billy?…lol….my big homie used to tell me “cap party til the sun come up..this way you always get to see the next day”…that’s legendary libra shit right there…sadly he passed away in his sleep on oct 15th…{r.i.p. CAROLINA RED)…so yeah i’m glad to hear someone other than myself is still carrying on tradition…now get ready to do it all over again…cuz it’s halloween bitches!!!…lol..gone

  • http://www.ronmexicocity.com ron mexico

    “The chicks at the Sauce party were actually friendlier than the birds at the Harris party. I think that is because the Sauce staffers are mosty hoodrats who like to have a good time while the chicks that work at King magazine are mostly men-haters. Not all of them, but most of them. Who can blame them though. Every month they have to photoshop the skidmarks from off some chick’s asscrack.”

    *dies*

  • KF UK

    Caffine tabs?

    Bro you need to get your flava flav on and have a sniff or too, you wont go stop parting untill…well shit when did Flav start? Early 80s?

    Serious tho…i need to hit up ree yak parties, the broads would love the English accent! get my james Bond on…..

  • Dal

    $3 on Court Street… stop lyin… that shit is $5…. When i buy XXL i pay ur salary

    • KF UK

      what the entire $5? I think maybe Bol is worth that but Mex? nah hes on at least $6.50 per blog….

  • Valdez

    Maybe u are unaware, but xxl costs $5 in the store now also.

  • Valdez

    ^^^which is why i don’t buy it anymore. $4 was cool, but i honestly don’t think it is worth $5.

    Maybe I’m alone on this, but I personally think xxl has fallen off pretty hard in the last couple of years.

  • JAY STONE

    Billy Goat give up oldman.
    You sucks!!!