Let me guess: Kanye West was upset at how teh ghey his new single is, and he decided to take his anger out on a camera. That’s why he’s in jail as we “speak.”
Do I mean to suggest that he sat around last night reading blog after blog weigh in about how much of an abortion “Love Lockdown” is, and he formulated a plan to attack a stalkerazzi in the airport the next day. Which just so happens to be the 7th anniversary of 9/11? (Cheers, everyone.)
Obviously not. I’m just saying. That may have been what was going on in his brain on a subconscious level. Otherwise, how to explain why he would pick today of all days to beat up a camera, when he’s been hounded by photographers for years, and he’s supposed to have not one but two albums out by the end of the year – his own 808s & Heartbreak and Jay-Z’s The Blueprint 3: The Curse that Keeps on Giving.
Video of the incident hit the Internets just now (like, literally, just now), and, holy crap, this is some of the most hilarious shit I’ve seen on the Internets all week long.
Kanye’s got on one of those silly designer leather backpacks that he wears, and a gray extra medium hoody with the hood pulled up over his head, Unabomber-style. Which I think would tend to lend credence to my theory that he was just looking for an excuse to get involved in some sort of violent incident – at least on a subconscious level.
Seriously, who in their right mind goes to the airport dressed like the Unabomber on the anniversary of 9/11?
Also, what the fuck is Kanye West doing flying commercial anyway? Is he not successful enough to get an account with Net Jets, like Diddy has? Is that why he’s flooding the market with what I’m sure is gonna be garbage this winter – to get his financial situation together?
I’m assuming he was about to get on a regular ol’ American Airlines flight, not unlike Diddy has been reduced to as of late, though I suppose one of those time share airlines would have to take off at the same airport as everyone else. But I doubt that was the case here.
In the video, if you notice, there’s lots of regular-looking people milling about, as if they’re all about to get on the same plane as Kanye. None of them seems all that concerned that Kanye and one of his weed carriers are going ape shit, even though it was on this day seven years ago that TPAR’s people pulled their little stunt.
There’s even some guys standing around in black suits, who I’m assuming were with the Department of Homeland Security or some such, and even they didn’t bother trying to restrain him or anything. I guess they figured they might as well just let him fuck up those cameras, if that’s what he wanted to do, and then they could go ahead and lock him up.
The whole scene is reminiscent of someone’s impetuous child throwing a temper tantrum because his mother wouldn’t buy him any McDonalds, and the effect is only enhanced by the fact that Kanye himself is pretty small in stature. Which probably worked out in his favor. If it was me, they probably would have broken out the tasers.
I’m also wondering where Kanye was going in the first place, and why he doing so much traveling and making so many appearnces at places, when he’s supposed to be producing two very high proflie rap albums by the end of the year, and I’ve yet to hear anything that suggests either of them is gonna be worth a shit. Though I have heard plenty of rumors that neither is gonna make its release date.
My guess is that Kanye’s got a buncha guys holed up in a studio somewhere doing all of the heavy lifting, and his plan was to come in at the last minute, sing some shit through a vocoder, and be done with it. (For example, he obviously let someone convince him that “Love Lockdown” was gonna be a good idea.) But now he’s realizing that’s probably not gonna work out very well for him, and he’s pissed.