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NEGRO PLEASE: Tupac More Overrated Than Elvis Presley?! Come on, Blender!

[Editor’s Note: “Blogger’s Note” has been taken over by Ron Mexico until further notice.]

“He had insane rock-star charisma. He admirably conceived of a gangsta rapper as a principled rebel. His booming baritone gave bass­lines competition for the most-trunk-rattling part of a hip-hop song. Hell, even Juice hasn’t aged nearly as badly as you’d expect. But while Tupac’s musical highs were epic—the pro-feminist ‘Keep Ya Head Up,’ the terrifying ‘Hail Mary,’ the boisterous ‘California Love’—that still leaves 15,837 other songs. He was a good rapper, not a great one: The guy larded records with self-mythologizing, mediocre filler that wouldn’t have made Biggie’s ‘give to Lil’ Cease’ file. Maybe someone in his retinue could’ve stepped in during one of those legendary 96-hour recording binges and said, ‘Pac, instead of laying down this 14-minute rant about how Sun Tzu taught you how to take down the East Coast, how about some Yahtzee?’ The man: awesome. The music: somewhat less than awesome.”Blender Magazine’s “The 33 Most Overrated in Rock”

This is a hilariously gully list filled with hate of the highest quality. (That is a compliment.) Given the list’s tongue-in-cheek nature, I had been reluctant to comment initially despite everyone around me being up in arms. Quite frankly, I agree that as wonderful and legendary as Tupac Amaru Rap Jesus Shakur may be, dude is insanely overrated.

This was, of course, until I finally observed that ‘Pac was deemed the top offender… and apparently of all time.

Tupac deserves to be part of such a list–but he doesn’t deserve to sit atop the motherfucker.

I’m assuming by “rock” they mean “popular music without regard to genre.” That’s what I get from magazines that put everything from Kanye to Coldplay in the same category. If anything popular is fair game, there’s no way Tupac in all of his perpetually resurrected glory is more overrated than say, an Elvis Presley.


Maybe Blender isn’t allowed to say “Elvis Presley’s” name in vain, but Ronnie can say whatever the fuck he wants.

Elvis Presley is the most overrated thing ever to happen to American popular music. More than thirty years have passed since he died fittingly on his shit bowl… as he was a pretty shitty package from what I’ve come to understand. He fucked and married children, then threw down on his child princess for fixing herself a little cockmeat sandwich after he threw his gyrating hips at every piece of trailer trash poon (and Ann Margaret) within pelvis-reach. After finally womping out on drugs and pancake-wrapped sausage, he’s still the most beloved musical figure in American history. To this very day he is referred to as “King” of the cloudy-ass genre in question.

Forgive me if I’m not feeling the royalty. I’d call a nigga like that a “fuckin’ bum.”

Today’s artists get railroaded for perpetrating any single one of “The King’s” well-publicized but universally-accepted transgressions and shortcomings of character.

Only time will tell if QVC will sell commemorative R. Kelly dinner plates that people will tell their grandkids not to eat on. I’m betting against it though. People don’t claim to see Tupac ordering pancake-wrapped sausage with extra bacon at strip mall diners up, down and diagonally across Middle America. Yet, Pac’s celebrity is considered less valid for some strange reason.

The nigga just put out a new mixtape LAST SUMMER! I bought it from Abdul on 125th Street with a pack of tube socks for $10!

It was the realest shit he ever wrote… back in ’94.

While we’re comparing the two, Gridlock’d alone shits on Elvis’ entire film catalogue. I don’t even have to whip out Above The Rim, Bullet, Poetic Justice, Gang Related and *GASP* Juice on that ass. Fuck a Jailhouse Rock. I’d rather watch Johnny Depp in Cry Baby.

Maybe Blender would argue that Elvis is included in “Music Before You Were Born (#25)” for much of their readership, but nostalgia for nostalgia’s sake is a far greater evil in this regard than an MC like Pac who had more to say than most artists of any genre of popular music in his day. That entire category should be ranked higher than Shakur. As overrated as he may be, most arguments for Pac as GOAT of the rapster universe are valid as fuck.

I’ll keep the (R)Ace of Spades in my pocket, but singling out Tupac and Timbaland (#26), placing them ahead of Kiss (#32) and not even mentioning Elvis is an atrocity and stinks to high hell.

Timbaland can’t be considered overrated when 80% of his listeners still don’t understand what he does for a track. You can go to a college bar where anywhere in America that plays his music and find people who think he’s merely Justin Timberlake’s hype man.

“Oh, you mean the big, scary black guy in the wifebeater who sings that one song with Nelly Furtado?”

Snarky hipster Blender writer negroes, please!

Yes, plenty of niggas think 2Pac is a prophet of biblical proportion. Yes, he has an extensive catalogue saturated with pseudo-gangster bravado and shit-popping filler that ultimately made him a target. No, Pac didn’t hold the sun still over the East Coast while Snoop Dogg pulled a drive-by from Boston to Boca Raton.

Still, there’s more greatness and thought-provoking social commentary in Me Against The World than that hip-swishing pedophile’s entire catalogue.

…and Elvis stole his whole swagger from black music.

Fuck. *pats pockets* Did anyone see my race card? I think I just dropped it.

Anyway… As I was saying–When 2Pac gets down from his cross he’s gonna pop a cap in all of your Blended asses.

Thug Life!

Questions? Commentes? Requests? All Eyez On Who?

P.S.: Yes, Biggie was a far more skilled rapper… but talent alone does not greatness make.

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