NEGRO PLEASE: Bow Wow vs. The Game – Madden ’09 Charity Blowjob Challenge

[Editor's Note: "Blogger's Note" has been taken over by Ron Mexico until further notice.]

I was gonna talk about Dame Dash’s broke ass but had a change of heart… I mean, plans.

Apparently, niggas wanna play some damn Playstation.

Earlier this week Lil’ Bow Wow went had one of his weed carriers run down to Wal-Mart or wherever to wait on line for one of them limited edition Madden ’09 20th Anniversary jawns. After inflating his ego by forcing his entourage to throw contests/only allowing them to use the Miami Dolphins, Mr. Wow issued a $100,000 challenge to The Game to, well, play games.

Let me not take anything away from The Other Weezy’s Madden skills. He’d allegedly beaten the Bojangle out of Soulja Boy, who only reads Playstation manuals. Shad must be doing something right.

With that much to his credit, Bow Wow need pump the damn brakes on his Power Wheels Hummer, gnome sane? Maybe he’s not aware that there’s a recession, you gnome sane? Flying The Game to Ohio from wherever Eazy-E’s testicles are buried is expensive, gnome sane? Gas prices high than a mawfucka right now, gnome sane? Niggas can do that shit online.

Y’all gnome-ass niggas gnome sane, nigga. This lil nigga Bow Wow say “nigga” and “gnome sane” entirely too damn much, gnome sane my nigga?

Ironically enough, Bow Wow cites L.A.X.’s imminent debut as the reason for $100,000 being nothing for Game” to put up. I think in all honesty homeboy already realizes that album sales ain’t shit and that YouTube hits are the real booty involved.

No “John David.”

Via requested medium, The Game not only accepts the challenge but requests to up the ante. Apparently the loser not only has to forefeit $100,000 (that may or may not go to charity) but also has to arrange for Ciara to gorglesnork the winner and his ensemble of merry [Super] Mario wallets.

What the fuck is wrong with Game?

While Game turns the conversation from a video foosball challenge to a perfectly normal Saturday night sleazy Black Wall Street gangbang hour, one of his niggas has the nerve to suggest “me first” when the camera turns his way.

Let’s take some time to introduce that nigga to the rules of this shit here. Even if Ciara could stop pop-locking long enough to suck anyone’s Big Meat, Mr. Weed Carrier doesn’t go first! WC gets whatever STDs the star/manager/star’s real best friend that doesn’t have to take possession charges/manager’s assitant/bodyguard/the guy that holds Game’s laptop leave behind on the subway, you dig?

“Me first?” That’s a “Negro Please” moment in and of itself. This is the kind of nigga who posts “first” on the blogs.

“And you ain’t seen the motherfuckin’ back of the bus.” –The Game

Oh, yes. We have… We just don’t want to go back there.

[Blogger's Note: This Black History Message has been brought to you by "Negro Please" and the United Negro College Fund.]

If Game wins I don’t know how he plans to collect his sausage rinse. Last I checked, Bow Weezy and Corey weren’t together anymore. I think I saw her trying to work for Diddy.

I’m joking, people. Relax. I heard Ciara’s dick isn’t big enough to qualify her as a dude.

If he really wanted to keep it funky he could have made that crack about Angela Simmons, but I suppose “RUN DMC” is a name he still plans to safely drop in the future.

I don’t know who would watch these niggas do what they do when they smoke out in Bow Wow’s play room, but hey. If $100,000 will be going to some inner-city pickaninnies, I’m with that. I won’t watch. But I’m all about the end result.

Somehow I think the proceeds will be finding their way to the Shad Moss Bathing Ape Foundation, but that’s just me.

Much like a tight round of Street Fighter II: Champion Edition, this one’s a Double KO of Negro Please-dom.

Bow Wow needs to just turn his day room into a full-time casino. Get the players all fucked up and take their money somehow, like a Ferengi.

While Ciara is totally a rapster jumpoff of the highest order, Game needs to leave the skeezers alone. It wasn’t a good look the last time he took off on the Wondercheekses of the world. It’s an even worse look today.

Not only does he come off as a misogynistic asshole who both fears and hates his own mama, but if Black Wall Street wants to take some Crying Game chances they might as well just buy out accept free drinks at a bar on Christopher Street and see what sticks.

Questions? Comments? Requests? Gnome sane? ron@ronmexicocity.com

P.S.: Game, unless you want to end up holding your head like Lil’ Wayne, don’t eat the brownies when you get to Bow Wow’s.

[Addendum: I just found this. Bow Wow goes back in on Game, his old tour bus and offers to put up gas money! It's like the little nigga read my mind. That's some Like Mike magic there.

These niggas REALLY should have talked to Madden first like geico lizard said.

Even a caveman could have went and got that money!

Nigga said he want MYA! These niggas is out of control.

"Floyd Mayweather on the Joysticks" earns Bow Wow whatever Nullus-related sentiment comes his way.]

  • yoprince

    lol.. the ciara mention was a shot at 50.

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      yes, clearly.

      • yoprince

        btw, i didn’t mean it was clever, nothing game does is clever (actually its always predictable, overdone, and overused), the “lol” was directed at your post. had to clear that up..

        • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

          oh, no doubt. i got you. we clear, holmes.

      • http://www.myspace.com/11spades11 Spades

        Yes clearly shut the fuck up white boy

  • geico lizard

    i agree with you ron about the bape collection will increase for the winner if that checks actually clears because i dont know if these guys can cut a cashiers check for 100grand. if they were so smart why are they giving madden free promotion? at least twista got paid to promote madden. you need to find out who that “me first” guy is because he jumped up out of nowhere for a shot at mvp of this negro please ish. we will just call him tyus edney for now,lmao

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      bwaaahahahaha @ tyus edney.

      wow. that’s some serious “hoop dreams”-era shit.

      2 points for the twista nod. so true.

  • DMV hustler

    LMAO, imagine bow wow losing and having to actually contact ciara, wonder if she knows how to dance on the joystick?

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      “umm, cee cee. yeah, this shad.”

      *click*

      nigga would have to call the voicemail and leave the most embarrassing message ever.

      “so yeah, i lost that bet right… and i need you to go suck game and his weed carriers off in their old-ass tour van.

      they’re somewhere in indiana right now. you can catch them if you run.

      zippety doo-dah. bye bye, now.”

  • $ykotic

    How can you play Madden 09 on Atari?

  • render

    I bet that country ass busdriver wishes he got his GED so he wouldnt have to drive the homothug negro bus across the country

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      *dies*

  • Penelope Rodriguez

    These rap niggas are too much for me. I can never take Bow Wow seriously. And Game don’t gotta mention Ciara’s name. She ain’t got shit to do with this

    • chad bro chill

      ciaras a tranny tht was the rumor and she has been quoted as saying shes a virgin ya know why cause i have a vagina and a dick

  • Diesel

    What if game won? lol that just SUCKS for ciara. but why would he bring her into this dumb ass bet anyways? the money going to chairity? on sohh, it said it was like idea or something.

  • TheCo!!inB

    joysticks…..really nigga?……..”ZIP IT UP AND ZIP IT OUUUUUUT!”

  • http://myspace.com/jermsinfect J™

    Lol ron u keepin killin these dudes…its ok dat lil bow wow tryin 2 make friends wit otha rappers but videogames? Smh..wats next? He calls game his favorite old school artist?

  • 239allday

    Good drop Ron, as usual. But DAMN!!! XXLmag is displaying severe symptoms of rheumatoid dick-ridis. All yall niggas been talkin bout is the Game. This is very similar to the way yall were riding Wayne in June. I wouldn’t be surprised if yall made a tab for him up there between bloggers and contests. Whatever…LAX is still going to be fire!!!

    Oh and by the way, I’ll body a nigga in Street Fighter. Yall fuck niggas can’t see me with Akuma.

  • ito

    lmao.. most niggas play videogames.. em niggas jus looked like herbs makin a big deal bout it…

  • Richard

    Ohio’s finest check out My mixtape WHO’S BETTER? on my page.

  • John Brown

    RON,

    Nice drop, but damn you aint had to take a jab at my Miami Dolphins. Imagine if Bow Wow wins and GAME calls MYA and she says ok. I bet you BOW WOW wouldnt know what to do with MYA, let alone where to start.

    *** MORTAL KOMBAT >>> STREET FIGHTERS***

    • EReal

      Marvel vs Capcom > Killer Instinct > Mortal Kombat > Street Fighter

  • http://XXLMAG.COM INTERNET BULLY

    WHOMP WHOMP WHOOOOOOMP… GOOD ONE RON. PUBLICITY STUNTS ARE LIKE HOOKERS IN VEGAS NOWA DAYS… EVERYTIME YOU TURN AROUND… BOW WOW WHAT A JOKE… HIS FATHER WAS BETTER OFF PUTTING ON A CONDOM OR PULLING OUT… SHOUT OUT TO GAME FOR STEPPING HIS “GAME” UP… THAT LAST ALBUM WAS DOOKEY BALLS…

  • Pierzy

    What up Mex! My bad for being late on this one, gnome sane? For real, this shit is ridiculous. If two dudes that you knew had this kind of back-and-forth in real life, you’d call both of them clowns. Now? It’s a couple of _____ that act hard and gangsta in videos arguing over video games… These dudes make Drama & Turtle look like winners by contrast.

  • Rudeboy

    nigga it took me like 15 minutes to read this blog.. shit was fucking hee-larry-us(college white boy accent)!!

    word, this shit was cool.

  • Manny78d

    This nigga Ron,

    “Flying The Game to Ohio from wherever Eazy-E’s testicles are buried is expensive.”

    “I heard Ciara’s dick isn’t big enough to qualify her as a dude.”

    Had me rollin like shit, and not a “no homo” in site !

    DMV, WE GO HARD!!

  • John Brown

    RON.

    BTW, the dude that said “me first” his name is KAOS. There is youtube video where game plays homeboy and 21′s him.

    ***Ironic how GAME says he got shot while he was playing MADDEN, now he is still getting shot will playing MADDEN but this time is CUM-SHOTS. Fuckin tour bus was a sausage party.***

  • Shawty J

    Despite how pointless this blog was and that I would’ve rather heard you blog about Damon Dash, this one was still pretty funny.

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com Ron Mexico

      we ain’t lettin dame escape. :)

  • DA TRUTH

    I got winner.

  • kashrulz

    I am actually interested in this little madden battle shit. Whatever distracts these rappers from music, i’ll watch. Game beasted when he said ciara gotta suck his whole entourage’s dick! Damn Homie! How you do that there??

    I got $500 on bow weezy!!!!!!!

  • DETROIT

    Bow Wow is the gayest nigga on earth, and he knows it! that’s why he’s always tryin to floss his lipsync money. in most cases, havin bread is all that matters, but bow wow could have a billion dollars and still be the weakest nigga in the game. remember when he sicked his bodyguards on torre? LMAO! he’s the softest nigga ever to rap!

    as for the game, he grew up in the foster care system, so he gets a pass. niggas like him are always a lil off!

  • Maddolies

    All I Got To Say Is…
    Black Wall Streets Bout To Blow The Fuck Up!
    Boom Boom!!!

  • DETROIT

    hey mr mex,

    I HAVE SOME SPECIAL REQUESTS

    you still haven’t spoke on this shawty lo nigga. his bankhead beefs are classic. I THINK HIS WEED CARRIERS ARE THE LAST LIVING SLAVES. it’s probably too late now tho, his 5 mins are up!

    also, PLEEEEEEASE speak on kwame kilpatrick tryin to get to the Democratic Convention by any means necessary, even tho barak don’t want him there!

    good job mex, i’ll holla back

  • droopey

    Yeah I saw the game video and I thought he sounded like a character from The Boondocks. That “nigga” needs to change his vocabulary I know he doesn’t speak like that on a regular.

  • Detroit P

    Ay Negro Please Jackpot for sayin Game>>>>>everybody except Kanye..and givin them weak ass reasons…..That was definitely a Negro Please…I double fuckin dare you to Negro please that nigga on that dumb shit

  • mig

    bow wow a ho

  • geico lizard

    when you catch up to dame you need to talk about swizz beats too ron.

    • http://www.ronmexicocity.com ron mexico

      yeen’t lyin.

  • Brownie

    Still moanin i see about games name droppin, i dont give a shit if he’s bangin out sick tracks i’d let him name drop a whole album and it wud still be better then half of the shit these rappers release these days. Peace

  • The Tony Reyes

    Damn,

    Bow Wow is that Desperate
    to
    make Friends….