Will black people boycott R. Kelly?

Apparently, there’s some huge email list the black community uses when they need to mobilize around an issue.

You’ll recall that said list was instrumental in getting black people to feign outrage when Don Imus expressed an aesthetic preference for black women with lighter skin and straighter hair (that fucking racist!), and when some racist-ass judge down in Louisiana tried to charge the Jena Six with attempted murder just for stomping one of their white classmates unconscious. Pfft!

I wouldn’t know, because I’m not on the list. (I’m assuming it’s just one list, but who knows. There could be several of them.) Even though I’m black – black meaning the descendant of African slaves, i.e. the least significant form of blackness these days – and I spend pretty much all of my time on the Internets, I didn’t find out about either of the aforementioned “causes” until when most white people did. It just goes to show how out of touch I am with my brothers and sisters.

The latest such cause? Throwing R. Kelly under a bus. There’s an email going around urging black men to boycott R. Kelly’s music, and to sign an R. Kelly petition.

The blog Racialicious has the text of the email along with a link to the petition, which they got from a site that, as far as I can tell isn’t even a black site. It’s a hispanic site. But you know how these hispanics love to take part in black people’s bullshit protests. It’s like the LA Riots all over again. (Ahem, the LA Uprising, to use the politically correct term.) The name of the site is La Chola, which I’m assuming is the feminine version of a “cholo,” as seen in the best movie evar, Havoc.

The text of the email mostly consists of the text of the petition. I’m not gonna copy and paste it all here, because it’s kinda long and kinda gay, and you can read the entire thing yourself on the actual petition website, if you’re so interested.

Checkit: Black Men Against the Exploitation of Black Women

But then along with the text of the petion, there’s also a list of action items, bullet point-steez, as well as a list of books and films you might want to check out, should you be interested in pandering to a black woman’s sense of mostly imagined besiegement. One of them was the anti-rape documentary (such a courageous stance!) by my former colleague DJ Drama’s lesbian sister. Shout out to Mr. Thanksgiving.

I’m assuming the action items are more key than the petition itself, in the sense that it’s not like the petition actually means anything. I’ve started a number of them myself over the years using the same exact site, including my petitions to have Kanye West banned from the Grammys, and my petition that Johnny Carson be denied a proper burial. Because he was a racist, and racists don’t deserve proper burials.

Which makes you wonder why the action items weren’t included in the text of petition. As it is, by signing the petition, you aren’t really agreeing to anything other than being nominally against the exploitation of black women. I would’ve signed it myself, if it wasn’t for all of the shit about R. Kelly being guilty, despite the fact that a jury just proved it wasn’t him on that tape. Could it be that whoever came up with this bullshit in the first place isn’t that smart?

Anyhoo, here’s a list of the key action items:

o Make a personal pledge to never support R. Kelly again in any form or fashion, unless he publicly apologizes for his behavior and gets help for his long-standing sexual conduct, in his private life and in his music

o Make a commitment in your own life to never to hit, beat, molest, rape, or exploit Black females in any way and, if you have, to take ownership for your behavior, seek emotional and spiritual help, and, over time, become a voice against all forms of Black female exploitation

o Challenge other Black males, no matter their age, class or educational background, or status in life, if they engage in behavior and language that is exploitative and or disrespectful to Black females in any way. If you say nothing, you become just as guilty.

o Learn to listen to the voices, concerns, needs, criticisms, and challenges of Black females, because they are our equals, and because in listening we will learn a new and different kind of Black manhood

Those last three you can mostly disregard. (I’m not saying you should beat or rape any black women, but it’s not like you were going to anyway.) But I thought that first one was interesting.

I remember there was talk of an R. Kelly boycott back when the tape first hit the streets, but it never really got anywhere. I think a couple of different stations stopped playing R. Kelly for a while. But then he got on one of his hot streaks, and it was just like, “Um, nevermind. The “Ignition” remix was just too good to be trying to make some sort of bullshit moral stance.

And it may have been thought that Arruh deserved to be considered innocent until proven guilty; and that, if it really did turn out that he’s been peeing on middle school-age girls, he’d be tossed in jail, the public would turn against him, and this wouldn’t be an issue one way or another. But obviously the main issue was the fact that people still loved R. Kelly’s music, and a lot of people saw the tape and didn’t think what he did constituted that much of a crime.

Now that he’s actually been found not guilty by a jury of his peers, I can’t imagine the success of an R. Kelly boycott would be any more likely. And anyway, I’m not sure what good it would do. Not only do I doubt that a decrease in sales of R. Kelly albums would actually prevent any black women from being beaten, but it probably wouldn’t even stop R. Kelly from peeing on young girls. It’s not like he could ever be hurting for money. And a lull in his career would just give him that much more free time!

  • http://www.myspace.com/omegaprepboy SBA

    this shit is great!

  • 239allday

    Have yall ever watched the Boondocks episode about the R.Kelly trial. That is prolly exactly the way it went down in the actual courtroom. If we haven’t boycotted the nigga since 2002 when all this shit started, why start now. Especially when he won the trial.

    • $ykotic

      Fam the Boondocks is that ISH! They been called it from the door!

      6 years later! Did u really think Kells would get popped 6 YEARS LATER?

      MOFO’s are disillusioned.

      And yes kats out here are riders…. Dick Riders!

      A “Let go of the Johnson” weekly blog sounds good.

      XXL LET’S DO THIS!!!!!

  • Yaw

    I thought the jury thought it actually was R. Kelly who was on the tape- they just weren’t sure about whether it was the alledged victim(?) in it.

  • JOVA

    Havoc is a dope movie….Anne Hathaway surprised me in that movie!!!

  • og bobby j

    why would a motherfucker care about what the fuck r. kellys doing…I got my own fucking problems…i aint got time to worry about who r. kelly is pissin on.

    So, next time i wit a broad and crusin…you might just hear “this is my song, for real, no doubt and the djs makin me feel thugged out” blarin out my shit.

    Plus…isnt anyone curious as to why this broad was just lettin niggas piss on her? most these bitches wont let a cat blow in her face….let alone piss

    someone need to make a “get off the next man dick” petition….

    • http://xxlmag.com Bol

      >someone need to make a “get off the next man dick” petition….

      Good idea.

    • http://www.going.com/larrybrite Larry Brite

      ***2nd that!***

      • og bobby j

        oh yea…no homo on that next mans dick petition….for you untied loose ankle ass niggas

    • iLL

      “someone need to make a “get off the next man dick” petition….”

      Amen to that. So many artist need one of them especially with the fickle way people love them one minute and hate them the next..he still messed up in the head though.

  • Negro Please

    Bol,

    I think I was mistakenly put on the infamous email list you were talking about, but instead of actually reading the messages, much less responding to them, I put them in my “Dumb Shit Black Folk Fight For, Even Though They Don’t Know Why” folder, and forgot all about it.

    And really, Aaruh did it (we all know that), but all that matters is that he was acquitted of all charges. The system worked didn’t it (even though there is still a chance that a civil suit could be brought against him and he might go broke for being “responsible” for a rime he isn’t “guilty” of, ala Orange Juice Simpson)? Nuff said.

    With all that being said, You know Dayum well that nuccas won’t boycott the “Pee’d… oops… Pied Piper of R&B” just cuz he pissed on some lil girl. Look at Lil Wayne, he kissed some old ass man (that he calls “Daddy” ‘rofl!) and is a closet drug addict (Dear Bobby and Whitney) and his shit still went dayum near Plat on in the first week (figures are all distorted so I’m goin with the lower numbas). Hell people will still go out and cop T.I.’s album even though we all know he snitched (that’s a whole other topic). Shi’ite, I wont lie, if MJ came back wearin’ the 45 (Mike Jackson, not Jordan homies) and dropped a slew of hit-makers like Billie Jean, Beat It, Thriller, You are not Alone, Man in the Mirror type shits, I would definitely phucks with it (no homo). And we all know, no matter what 12 of our peers say, that nucca is guilty. But hey I guess I’m a hypocrite

  • http://myspace.com/marko4aoc Marko-V

    We as Blacks tend to fight the wrong battles and place our concerns on things we feel we can ultimately win instead of fighting the things we might lose in hopes of progressin our battle. The whole R.Kelly ordeal was never going to end with a guilty verdict and everyone knew it. Sistahs in the hood was mad at the chic because she coulda got paid off dude witout reportin it. Same thing wit Mystikal (if you niggaz remember that case). Black men stay gettin persecuted because of the world’s fear of our sexual dominance. They used to castrate us in slavery, rape our wives to strip away our manhood and now when a dude wins a court case brought on by a jilted former flame and the white government you still want to stop this man from living his life. You’ve been brainwashed, bamboozled, and run amok.

    • ODB

      You might have to try if you wanted to sound gayer that you just did with that old “our sexual dominance” bullshit. What, are you Mr. Marcus?
      He’s a black man that raped and peed on a black child. How did Whitey even get into this conversation???
      “our sexual dominance” makes you sound like a rapist, you creepy bastard.

      • http://myspace.com/marko4aoc Marko-V

        You ignorant swine eater. He did not rape that chic. The only reason they prosecuted was because he was a black man makin a lot of money. FLAT OUT. If you are Black, race will be a part of any and every thing you do.
        Do your history pussy.

  • http://therenaissanceforthenewmillenium.blogspot.com/ Missy

    Weren’t the jurors interviewed and stated that they did indeed believe that it was R. Kelly on the tape they just were not certain of the victim???

    I’m a bit concerned with the “mostly imagined” besiegement of black females. Black males are under the same such besiegement.

  • http://www.xxlmag.com the chancellor

    Listen folks, I didn’t see the tape, at least not the whole thing, but I couldn’t make out if it was him or not. I am however a firm believer in if your not guilty, then your not guilty. I know the legal system is wack. We could go on and on, but he walked away a free man. The end.

    Bol,

    Could you enlighten me on carson? Not even on some corny shit, but I was just curious. Was it the petey greene shit? I know he felt a certain way about us niggas after that lol

    • http://xxlmag.com Bol

      It’s a long story. I don’t even know if he was actually racist.

  • geico lizard

    i have that boondocks dvd of the r kelly trial and rkelly fans and rkelly is acting the same way they said they would all act after he was acquitted. i want a boondocks season 3 but if you buy the dvd mcgruder sounds like its not going to happen but a movie may happen. nice post bol when the xxl site was down i went to your website and i was crying at those comments the are too funny man especially the comments to that burger king sandwich and the british guy trying to open up about his bad experience at the uk bk.

  • Rex Banner

    I’m not gonna buy the next r.kelly album, fuck boycotting shit lol. I like how it says you agree to not rape or hit any BLACK woman, shouldn’t it be just any woman? fuck it I’m gonna go out and slap the next chick i see that’s not black for the hell of it

  • aaron lloyd

    this is why some people should never be allowed to run a blog. this idiot cant even agree that r kelly is a bastard and black men should stand up and against him peeing on our children. if black men cant stand against that, what would we stand up for? this fool offers nothing of a positive nature to our community. him or r kelly and if it was his child being molested, god and heaven forbid, i am sure he would have a different take on r kelly and his not guilty verdict, and the purchase of his music.

  • Smitty313

    That was him on the tape.

  • Jhon da Analyst

    “Introduce him to some older women, hide his camcorder……………” Courtesy of Huey Freeman

  • Oneofthemyo’s

    Dam that was on a gwalla gwalla website hmmm..
    Its funny black people more on his ass than n e 1 but I’m sure it would’ve been different if chick was white,
    Umm “our sexual dominance” is not bullshit! N/H, and young reezy been predicted this but hey he was found not guilty in a court of law, whats the problem yall naggers dont believe in the justice system? The last sentence of the propogan.. I mean blog is a scary thought though, r.kelly with free time=scary.

  • REALTALK

    Somebody needs to do a petition about todays black kids being fatherless.

    And how black men need to start being fathers to their kids.

  • Westcoast Mexican

    R. Kelly is the shit, all u old ass muthafuckas quit it with the nonsense bullshit,

  • http://xx gside

    How the fuck was Johnny Crason rasist explian that to I love the tonight show when he was on it I don’t watch that shit no more. Fuck R.Kelly I a’int never bought his shit before and never will something about him a’int never set well with me , he makes good shit .I just don’t fuck with him I never seen the sex tape that’s how much I don’t fuck with him.