Not all kids are worth knowing

I’m sure it’s difficult when you somehow end up with a baby by a broad you had no intentions on doing anything with, other than dropping your load in her and being done with it.

Like, maybe you were going especially hard, and the rubber broke. And then she didn’t want to get an abortion, because she knew you had some money, and she wasn’t the kind of broad that could pull a man of your caliber without pulling some ol’ bullshit like that. (Let’s face it, if you’re a black man these days, it’s a buyer’s market.)

Or maybe she was planning on playing you all along. So she told you she was on the pill, knowing good and well that she wasn’t. Or she poked a tiny hole in the rubber while you weren’t looking, like the one kid did with that deaf broad (I’ll maintain to this day that she was smokin’) on Weeds.

Now you’re stuck paying for some baby you hardly have anything to do with – other than that you once had sex with its mother – for the next 18 years, if not longer. I’m not saying a man in that situation should try to duck his responsibility. I’m just saying. I can sympathize with that man’s plight. I’m human like that.

Hence I wasn’t all that upset when I read a couple of weeks ago that Juvenile didn’t bother to show up to the funeral of that daughter of his who got mercked by her batshit teenage brother. I saw a few people on the Internets pretended to be upset, but you know how it is on the Internets. People will feign outrage about anything.

On the one hand, I’m sure it would be weird to have one of your kids die and not show up to the funeral. I probably would’ve shown up myself just to keep up appearances. Lord knows the last thing I need is for people to get the wrong idea about me. But on the other hand, I’m sure it’s hard to say exactly how you’d feel if you were in that situation.

Most likely, Juvenile didn’t have very much in the way of interaction with the poor bastard, other than when he sat down each month and wrote its mother a check for some ridonkulous sum. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if, when he heard the news, his first thought was, “Wow, as bad as it is, it’s gonna save me a shiteload of money.”

I know, that’s awful. It’s probably true though.

There may have also been some ambivalence towards the baby’s mother, which would of course only be projected onto the child, in that Juvenile knew the baby’s mother wasn’t shit, and that her older son was crazy, but there wasn’t a whole lot he could do, since the family court system in this country is so biased in favor of women.

SIMILARLY, Eddie Murphy isn’t even gonna bother meeting the baby he recently had by Scary Spice. He’s pissed because she pulled the old trick of telling him he could hit it raw, since she was on the pill. Next thing you know, she was knocked up with his baby.

Supposedly, Eddie shelled out for her prenatal care and what have you (she must have smoked up that Spice Girls money), but now they’re in court trying to hash out a child support agreement. Eddie’s trying to get the payment as low as possible, since he didn’t want the baby in the first place, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he ends up getting stuck big time.

Actually, I’m surprised that girls can even pull that lying about being on the pill shit. There should be a law that says that, if a broad pulls some shit like that, she shouldn’t get any child support on GP. The only thing would be that I’m not sure how you’d go about proving she actually said she was on the pill, unless you got the whole thing on tape.

It should be obvious though, if you’ve got a shiteload of money, and the woman in question is someone you obviously couldn’t have any intentions on being with. I’d sat that even if you can’t prove that the man was definitely tricked, there should be some sort of consideration with regard to the caliber of the child’s mother when it comes to child support payments.

Some broads just plain don’t deserve that kind of money.

I guess what it comes down to is that, if you’re a guy, and you’ve got a shiteload of money, you’ve got to be extra careful about where you drop your load. You could end up with a child you could care less about by a woman you can’t stand, and then people will think you’re the one that’s the asshole when you don’t want to have anything to do with it.

What do you fruits think? Is it weird that guys like Juvenile and Eddie Murphy don’t want anything to do with their kids? Also, can any of you think of ways to turn this shit around on me, as if I’m the one who’s the asshole, let alone the fact that I don’t even have any kids? I’m sure you can. That’s all you people ever do.

  • http://xxl Dannnn

    I actually think you nailed it, man. Informative….

  • ATL = All Trannies Live

    I don’t care if the woman told you that she had her ovaries removed with sandpaper. You know what could come with sex (babies, stds) well before you engage in the act. It takes 2 to tango. So enter at your own risk.

  • spoke

    lol more real talk from bol…but on the cool, I aint have neither of my parents around so I couldn’t imagine doin a kid like that. Thats rough. It aint they fault mayne.

  • jonathan

    the real part about it is! there is no way to know that someone had a kid by me! i could not know who the hell this woman is! and how the hell she got pregnant! but it must have been on purpose and she obviously got pregnant! if you are talking about the broad in starbucks yesterday the black girl! i dont know that girl! i seen her looking at me in the face! but i have no idea who that broad is! i would remember sleeping with someone! these people are just makeing up shit to steal money! im starting to believe maybee i do have a kid out there but not by anyone who is claiming i do! for real for real! its just some bullshit so these people can steal money! for real for real! i dont know that chick from yesterday at all in starbucks that brownskin girl! i seen everyone looking like i was suppose to know her! but i dont! at all! for real for real! its really some crazy shit! i mean you got on tape every single person i been with! i dont get how this is even a question! but i guess its really not! ill never know!

    • akaTheRealist

      wtf…

  • Rizob

    of course i dont know the details behind juvie and his baby mama and child. but he may be one of those people that just doesnt believe in funerals. once a person is dead, he/she is gone. whatever feeling you had for that person can no longer be expressed to that person. a funeral nowadays is really for the benefit of the public, not the dead. i myself do not go to funerals, they’re (for lack of a better word) useless. This may be the reasoning behind Juvie actions.

    • Chaka

      Can you bury yourself when You die?If you cant then start thinking about what will happen to your body when you die if every one in your community(including your friends and relatives)do not believe in funerals like you.If you really think about this you will realise that you have been selfish all this while for not attending your loved ones funeral…As for my comment on the present topic.We all should remember that these kids did not ask their parents to give birth to them.So their parents should not use whatever problem or issue they have between themselves as a cause to hate or dislike their kids.The kids are innocent…As for you Bol,I havent forgotten about your comments about Pac being an inferior artist and a douche.That was a careless statment not befitting of someone like you.Peace an hip hop head in Africa wrote this

  • Southern Sovereign

    Ya Know Bol. I’ve hated ya mufuckin’ ass ever since you hit cyberspace with this blog…………But I gotta admit, You come with nothing but the ass-naked truth.

    It’s hilarious to me that women are seen as heroes when they become single parents knowing the “possilbe father” or group of niggas in question, will have nothing to do with the child and then continue to carry and eventually give birth to a child thus depriving them of a complete life with both parents.

    Where as a man could be be told a lie like “I’m on the pill” and get hit with a paternity suit 9 months to the day and gets looks like he’s the scum of the earth. Look what happened to Scott Storch. The “White Jewish Guy” has a “completely black daughter” not because he fathered the child but because the court says he did. There should be a petetion or something to get these laws re-written(Bol start sumthin, I got college to worry about).

    But in closing the shit you said Chili Bol(your new name) was harsh, but it was the truth. So consider me a new fan.

    SS Gone.

  • Ashley

    WOW!!! Personal experience? LOL.. I agree to some extent. Since you do not have any kids, I can understand where the basis of your opinion may come from. However, being an adult you should be aware of what can come from your actions. Many women, are decietful and do things as you have explained for personal gain. But, if your dumb enough to listen to a female, that you WOULDN’T have a lasting relationship with, then you should slap yourself! Not only do you not know anything about this “one timer” or their sexual history, then you deserve to pay for your stupidity. Think about your health before you lay down and, in this case, your money! But the bigger picture is; There is a child involved. Yes you may not want anything to do with the child, but it is a part of you, yourself. Believe it or not, there are women supporting their families solely. They may have not kept the un-planned child for money reasons, but rather for morals, religious beliefs or whatever. So fine, don’t have anything to do with a child that you don’t want yet helped to create. But, atleast provide some financial support so the child can eat, dress, and enjoy things in life like many of these celebrities that you referred to do.

    • Y. Fame

      I agree wit Ash. People gotta think out here. On both ends.

      You should check out BeatsAndFoodStamps.blogspot.com. I think you’ll like the material

  • http://www.myspace.com/friscorepresenter ant

    Bol 4 president

  • Allen_J

    Man I’ve been saying that for years they’re should be some law against that women lying saying the on the pill just to get pregnant and rich off people who have money

  • geico lizard

    http://www.nationalcenterformen.org/
    Bol its messed up that women can lie to a man that he is the only one who could possibly be the father and then after the dna test shows he isnt the father he cant sue her for fraud or sue to get his child support money back. women get away with this all the time and then complain about they have no rights. women can get away with murder in this country its crazy. dont be afraid to ask for a dna test in court fellas no matter how mad you think she might get it could save you 18 years of lies and her stealing money from you if she lied. Chris Rock always jokes about women setting men up like that but he is speaking from experience.

  • geico lizard
  • Iceberg Slimm

    I’m rolling with Eddie on this one. People think just cause it’s your kid you have to take care of it, but bitches do scandulous shit like this all the time and they shouldn’t get away with it. If a female set me up like that, I probably wouldn’t want shit to do with the bastard either.

    So when that girl asks why her dad doesn’t want to see her, don’t tell her because he ain’t a “real” man. It’s because you tried to trap him and these are the consequences of your stupid ass actions.

  • avengerxl

    Bol you got a point women should be held accountable for there actions and so should men. They both must be held accountable on equal footing. Most cats agree with you becuase they on some other shit(i.e. behind on child support). But on the real dudes should be more careful with whom they fuck. Even if she is a bangin video hoefessional type you got to know that random ish leads to this type of things or STDS eventually. So do what you got to do just know the risks and try not to think with the wrong head. If you caught up and got loot gone cover the kid, it didn’t ask to be here because it has two fucked the fuck up parents and it shouldn’t suffer if you can help it after all it is a part of your dumb as and your family lineage. Truth be told the one you throw away may be the one who saves yo worthless black ass. So fuck the chick but handle yours on the real or just dump in hookers word to elliot spitzer.

  • master cheef

    this post will go down as one of your classics.

  • Fernando

    Damn Bol, scratch Juvie off your list.

    You better watch out fat man, as gully as some of these southern rappers and their bag handlers are, I wouldnt be suprised if somebody comes after yo a$$.

    Its a good thing that nobody reads your crappy blogs or bothers to care about them.

    This one was a classic though. Probably one of your best along with calling Papoose a ninja.

  • http://xxlmag.com houston’s finest

    well written

  • lelsie

    it’s fucking hilarious that ya’ll niggas act like we gotta friggin talk you out of your condoms! what a load of crap. std are flying around the hood cuz u bisexual part time prisoners stay running in up in barely legal girls without condoms, implication being monogamy. When’t the last time any of you losers had to beg a bitch to keep your condom on! fags.

  • Surfer Dude

    Yeah, lets start the movement, we want a real black man (no homo) that speaks th truth and keep them bitches on a leash,
    BOL FOR PRESIDENT 08!!!!!!!!!!!

    • Ignant Nicca

      i hate ignorant people……

  • Sirius

    When girls have fathers like this, they grow up to be video hos.

  • yeeee

    That is why you blast in her face or what ever body surface you prefer and then spray her sticky ass with 409 to kill the sperms.

  • The Spaniard

    These “man’s rights” posts are on point like a lazer beam.

    I’m not even sure if you’re joking or not but this shit is 100% accurate. I tell broads right out the gate that “I don’t want any kids from you, PERIOD! So if you get pregnant it’s an abortion…one way or another” and either they agree or disagree with my sensitive and reasonable prerequisite.

    Not suprisingly, this simple statement filters out a large number of potential sperm recepticals. Plus, it’s hard to get pregnant by me anyway…unless you have ovaries in your throat.

    Lastly, to all the men out there…it’s a buyer’s market…period, white or black (or whatever). Stop simping and get your minds right.

    • E

      “ovaries in your throat”…clutch

  • http://xxlmag.com Kane Corleone

    No he didnt nail shit he just made a statement that all dumbass niggas will cosign.Wear a fucking condom ,your own condoms niggas not the one a bitch gave you.Also what dumbass nigga just takes a bitch’s word when she say she on the pill?Woooow game is to be sold there was once a group called Penthouse Playaz Clique they had a song called “Trust No Bitches” listen to it .6star general @ ease

  • The Spaniard

    Rizob is on point also.

    Funerals are a bizarre ritual. I’ll be damned if I am going to waste time sit in a room with a corpse, with some people actually touching and kissing the stiff then go waste more time & land by buring the corpse.

    No thanks, I’d would rather sit at home and remember the good times while I am doing something useful…like relaxing on my sofa or making a grilled cheese sandwich.

    • ?

      Yeah, when I die I don’t want to have a funeral. I’d rather just be cremated and have people remember me.

      And why wouldn’t you wear a condom if you don’t want to have a kid? It’s common sense that if you bust a nut in a girl’s pussy a kid will likely be created. Or did some of us fail health class? In my opinion, people should only go raw if they want to procreate.

      On another note, who the hell trusts a girl to say that she’s on the pill or takes a condom from her? Those dumb asses deserve what they get.

      • starboy

        that you Questlove?

      • Chaka

        ? ,cremation is still part of a funeral process just like burial is part of a funeral process.You,Rizob and The Spaniard should just open up and tell us the truth:Cemetaries make you think of your own end,and this makes you scared.Check the comment I left for Rizob(see above),you might learn something there.Peace

  • dsread

    Byron I thought you could never go any lower well you proved me wrong this is terrible.

    • http://xxlmag.com Bol

      It’s gonna go lower than this. Just you wait.

  • Taneto

    Like Eddie Griffin said:

    “And then when you thought you gon’ lose the nigga
    you went and got pregant – didn’t you bitch, DIDN’T YOU!!
    THE OL’ KEEP A NIGGA BABY
    And then when the nigga ain’t around, what do you tell the child?
    “Aww that nigga ain’t shit, that’s why yo’ daddy ain’t here;
    cause that nigga ain’t shit.”
    How bout bein a woman, and tellin the kid the truth
    that yo’ momma, you was a hoe!
    TELL THE KID!
    Momma was a hoe, I was weekend pussy
    I had you to keep the nigga, it didn’t work out
    that’s why he ain’t here – but he a good nigga
    cause he take care of his REAL family
    I was just a dumb bitch, tryin to keep, a nigga that I wanted”

  • http://www.flavanetwork.tv Tj Sun

    You hit it on the head again. Please get at us we would love to have you comment on so other hip hop hot topics!
    TJ Sun

    http://www.Flavanetwork.tv

  • crocker

    Bol. Damn. That shit’s happening to me as we speak. Married with two, count em two kids. And the husband isn’t father to either of them, and the kids have two different fathers. U hittin a lil’ too close to home. But regardless, ur still my favorite caucasian hip-hop blogger. Nullus.

  • POLO DIZ

    thats real talk..this chicc tried to stick me the same way..too bad i aint rich like juvie and them…so she eventually changed her mind. I aint sayen it was right…but that was a bill i coulnt afford…but anyway..good post.

    http://www.myspace.com/polo_diz

    i got beats for sale bitches!!

  • mr go getta25

    Well Bol you nailed it. I have been the victim of the vindictive woman. I have a child by a woman I only knew for a week and it only took one time. Here are the details:
    1. Met her at a club.
    2. She found out I had a good job after talking for about a week.
    3. Went to a hotel.
    4. Had my own rubbers.
    5. She poked a whole in MY rubber(s) while I was in the bathroom.
    6. She later told me that she had poked a hole in the rubber, after I found out she was 3 months preggers
    7. Now I have to pay $2145.87 per month to a woman that has 3 other children that don’t receive 1 DIME in support from their fathers!!!
    8. Before you say I am a dumbass when we met it was the summer and her kids were away at their grandparents house, so I never even knew she had children. **The woman has the body and face of a 23 year old
    Word of Advice:
    “Get out of the booty when you drop the load”

  • BORN IN THE NORTH, RAISED IN THE SOUTH

    There are so many other places to nutt than inside the puss… When will niggaz learn?

  • The Spaniard

    “You,Rizob and The Spaniard should just open up and tell us the truth:Cemetaries make you think of your own end,and this makes you scared.”

    I see that Hollywood Upstairs Medical College has resumed its psychology program recently.

    I’ve worked at a funeral home. The paralyzing fear of subcoming to my mortality was to much to bear…even now just thinking about death makes me want to cry…oh my god! What will I do? Arrggghhhh!

    Wait…I’m fine now.

    Dead bodies don’t scare me & neither does “my end”. People standing in a room with a corpse, kissing it and wasting money burying it, is stupid and a waste of time and resources so I don’t do it.

    • Chaka

      My brother its called love and respect.Thats what we show to the dead when we give them a good and decent burial(not all good burials require much spending).After all,it was with that same body they where able to show us their own love and respect while they were in this life.Its like you did not read the post I directed you to read,please do because you might learn something there…oh i almost forgot to tell you.You said:”People standing in a room with a corpse, kissing it and wasting money burying it, is stupid and a waste of time and resources so I don’t do it”.This statment from you reminds me of a Biblical narrative in John 12:1-7 where Judas was complaining that a woman who out of love for Christ poured an expensive perfume on Christ’s feet,was being wasteful.Judas words where:”why wasn’t this perfume sold and the money given to the poor?It was worth a year’s wages”.But note what the sacred writer said was the main reason behind this comment from Judas:”He[Judas]did not say this because he cared about the poor but because he was a thief;as keeper of the money bag,he used to help himself to what was put into it”.From the way you spoke,i bet if one where to invesigate the main reason behind your complain about people being wasteful in giving their loved ones a befitting burial,one would discover that they are nothing but selfish reasons.Happy Easter to you all.Peace

  • The Spaniard

    “Its like you did not read the post I directed you to read,please do because you might learn something there”

    Sure I did, in fact, a reasonable person would conclude that I actually addressed your comments in full.

    Pay attention to the series of stamements listed below…

    [Me]
    Funerals are a bizarre ritual. I’ll be damned if I am going to waste time sit in a room with a corpse, with some people actually touching and kissing the stiff then go waste more time & land by buring the corpse.

    [You]
    “You,Rizob and The Spaniard should just open up and tell us the truth:Cemetaries make you think of your own end,and this makes you scared.”

    [Me]
    I’ve worked at a funeral home. The paralyzing fear of subcoming to my mortality was to much to bear…even now just thinking about death makes me want to cry…oh my god! What will I do? Arrggghhhh!….People standing in a room with a corpse, kissing it and wasting money burying it, is stupid and a waste of time and resources so I don’t do it.

    [You]
    Thats what we show to the dead when we give them a good and decent burial

    If that’s what you want to do to show your love and respect…ok.

    You think mourning and showing “respect” to your deceased loved ones involves having a official ritual with their rotting corpse…I don’t. Selective bible quoting irrelevent to me also as the bible is filled with inaccuracies and logical fallicies.

    Anyone I associate with would not want money wasted on a funeral so I am showing the proper respect to their wishes.

    Why would a story about a biblical thief looking for easy access to new marks have any relevence to what I said? I’ll give you the benifit of the doubt and assume you were making a (false) general analogy about hidden motives behind dislike of funerals. I assure you, like I said before, I’m not “scared” of dying, I mourn my dead family and friends to my satisfaction, and I surely do not want to rob anyone of their burial finances.

    Any money or land used on a funeral is a waste of resources in my opinion, irrespective of any funeral bargins that may exist.

    I would even go so far as to suggest that your love for funerals come directly from your religous beliefs and not from some desire to show “respect”. Good luck.

    • Chaka

      My brother before we continue this discussion, please tell me what you want the people associated with you to do with your remains when you die?Do you want them to leave it in the open to rot away as if you are a rat?or do you want them to cremate or bury it?peace.

  • Chaka

    The Spaniard,i will be back to my sit in two days time.Would like to discuss more with you.My off for the Easter holiday.Peace

  • The Spaniard

    I want them to use the cheapest cremation service possible. I imagine leaving the body to rot would be a major health hazard (and illegal).

    Any money that would have been spent on funeral & burial services should be allocated toward something that not being placed into the ground. A memorial service or some sort of gathering of friends would be great if people want to remember the good times they had with me. If anyone spends any money burying me or looking at my corpse, they better hope I can’t come back and haunt them because I will make their life a living hell.

    • Chaka

      My brother even if its the cheapest cremation service possible,money is still being spent; and cremation,like burial,is a funeral process.So if you want to be consistent in your statment that any money or land used on a funeral is a waste of resources, irrespective of any funeral bargins that may exist;then you should have opt that you want those associated with you to leave your body to rot in a desert(atleast it would not be a major health hazard there).My bother lets not continue to argue over this.Funeral is part of the natural instinct of man and so it is found in every culture and is practiced by every race.It is a way in which those who are left behind pay their respect to those who have departed from this life.Peace.

      [note:In this my post,I refrained from making any argument from the Bible,because I feel,from your earlier post,you are of a different faith.But that does mean that i feel you are right in your statment that the Bible is filled with inaccuracies and logical fallicies.You are wrong here,but this is not the place to discuss such topics.]

  • The Spaniard

    Now you’re equivocating…and ignoring the fact that leaving bodies rot illegal and the word funeral was not being used in place of “corpse disposal”

    Anyway, my argument is not to use zero resources, as you have framed it, but to use the least amount of resources as possible.

    Personally, I wouldn’t give a shit about being left in a desert to rot because…I’m dead. I won’t be thinking about anything.

    And since I don’t live in a desert it would most certainly waste unnecessacary resources in order to transport my rotting corpse. Is that consistent enough?

    I agree with you that funerals are practiced in abundance in many cultures…along with a laundry list of other stupid shit that I could also haphazardly apply to the “instinct of man” (if I only had my PhD in Human Studies from H.U.M.C.).

    The source of your argument was apparent (and explictly referenced). The logical flow of your line of thoughtin regards to this debate fits well with the fact that you don’t see the gaping holes in the writting of the “Holy” Bible…especially if it is supposed to be inerrant…which it’s not…unless you like to equivocate the meaning and context of words…which you do.

    May Apollo bless you.

  • CZA

    Always quick with the “It takes two” but it only takes one to keep it. Crazy, huh?