Heavy Mental

Prince Markie Dee. Kool Rock Ski. Buff The Human Beat Box. The Fat Boys. Ring a bell. Yeah you heard of them. At least some of you old heads like myself have. You think you know but you have no idea. These dudes weren’t a novelty act in the beginning. Before they was twisting with Chubby Checker, playing touch football with William “The Refrigerator” Perry and creating on screen hijinks with Ralph Bellamy and the nigga who was sticking Laura in that soap opera. (Lucille my grandma kept the kid up on Ryan’s Hope and them other ABC joints). They were a true rap powerhouse.

Back then it was hard to touch Run-DMC but they duked it out with Whodini for second banana status. You cocker spaniel dogs couldn’t touch their early catalogue: “Can You Feel It”; “Stick ‘Em (Buh-stick-‘em-ha-ha-stick-‘em!); “Fat Boys”; “Human Beat Box” their 1984 jump-off had some filler but it was tighter than Beyonce’s hair weave on tour. The fun fact was Kurtis Blow who was tight that his protégé DJ Run was outshining the master provided all the early beats. Payback is a mutha, Russell.

The original big niggas from Brooklyn had some other heat: “All You Can Eat”; “In The House”; “Jail House Rap” (which a lot of you rappers today can relate to. Ha!) The fucked up thing about all this is the CD treatment of these pioneering dudes. You’d be hard-pressed to find a Fat Boys disc without some digging. As far as I know all their good early albums aren’t available in their entirety on compact disc. Your best bet is to dig for the 1997 Rhino comp that best justly gives them their due: All Meat No Filler: The Best of Fat Boys. (It’s got a 100 hundred bucks or so ebay tag to boot!)

See even their greatest hits has some kind of goofy title. Clowning them. Yeah these guys had dollar signs in their eyes and went Hollyweird at the first opportunity but I got a soft spot for those chubbsters. I think I even did a Fat Boys feature in one of my early XXL’s (damned if I could remember which one). They’re probably hip-hop’s most misunderstood but hugely successful (no pun intended) acts from the era before the Golden era.

I wouldn’t hold my breath for a Hip-Hop Honors award but at least YN thought about y’all and acknowledged the legacy on a Saturday night. RIP to Queen Pen’s baby’s daddy.

Sidebar: Prince Markie Dee’s dolo latter-day hit “Typical Reasons (Swing My Way)” was tighter than Erykah Badu’s

  • turnerclassicmovies

    i mean if you’re gonna talk fat boys, talk kid ‘n’ play.

  • PURPLE HULK

    1ST

    • ill G

      you fuckin homo

  • K_Lang

    Yo, anyone listenin to hip hop that old is still got tape decks! If they did sell it in the stores in cd format do u actually think that people will buy it? I know they the pioneers and all, but I think they’d be better off selling it like those heart and soul albums u buy off infomercials.

  • http://XXLmag.com Brendan

    “Crushin’” was definitely one of the first rap tapes I ever had. They made me wish we had Sbarro in the country.

  • http://www.plasticsquirtguns.blogspot.com thoreauly77

    aha, p-hulk lost.

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  • b-easfe

    Everbody forgets how HUGE the fat boys really were (pause and no pun intended). That horrible movie is literally my first hiphop memory. They deserve a pointless Honor Award.

  • http://xxlmag.com Kane Corleone

    A… they sleep on who her baby daddy is cuz. The young homies have no idea the knowledge that was just dropped.Ha!!gettin my older god on.lol.Dont really go to buffets anymore but when I do, put that on everything I love cuz “all u can eat ” just pops in my head.Caaannnn yooouu feellll it,was my shit if u wore size husky back in 85 ,86 them niggas was the truth til Heavy came!

  • dolo

    From fat joe to the fat boys. . You redeemed urself yn

  • Slo Mo

    I appreciate this post – I was all about the Fat Boys as a kid and I still bump the cuts you mentioned. And I agree, aside from all their novelty songs, they were nasty mcs in their day with some top-notch beats, and Buffy made them totally unique without any gimmicks necessary. RIP. I’ve always read some brief references to Buffy battling Doug E. Fresh . . . I’d kill to get a full account of that story.

  • Josh

    Got all their old albums on wax…and the “Crushin” single b/w “Wipeout” (or was it “Wipeout” b/w “Crushin”?) on 45.

  • latino heat

    buffie was queen pens baby daddy?! thats deep! i guess yn was gettin tired by this point cause the typos are staring to add up as they go on. i know im late but im gonna get through all these. this shit is all pure gold yn.