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Lil’ Wang Is The Jawa Of This Rap Shit…

What the fuck peanut butter and jelly shit is this?!?! Lil’ Wang stays getting merc’ked on every track that he guest rhymes on. Tell me I’m lying. Most recently he played the role of Sammy Sosa on KanYe West’s ‘Barry Bonds’. Actually he was more like Rafael Palmiero, since he stays poppin’ that HGH even after the league banned it. Now I just listened to Little Brother’s ‘Breaking My Heart’ and even the weedcarriers’ weedcarrier splits Wang’s wig. No disrespect to Phonte who does his thing in general, but true story is that he is 9th Wonder’s sack stasher, and Big Pooh carries Phonte’s bags [ll].

I don’t even want Wang to fuck with Fifty Cent right now. It wouldn’t even be close. You see what Fifty did to Cam’Ron? The whole Dipset movement is in turmoil now. Lil’ Wang is Cash Money Records savior and if Fifty gets his hands around his neck it will be ugly. I love bashing Lil’ Wang because I don’t care for his skillset, but I don’t want to see the lil’ homey obliterated like that. Fifty squeezed Ja Rule out the game so bad my dude can’t even get work as a Fredro Starr stand-in. Damn, here we go again.

I call Lil’ Wang the Jawa of the rap game because you remember how they came from that planet that was like a wasteland? Isn’t that what New Orleans is like to this very minute? Plus the Jawas were all about passing off junk as new shit. Remember when they sold Owen Lars that broke down astromech droid that exploded before he choose R2-D2? That’s just how the Jawas get down. On some shifty bullshit. That’s why they stay getting merc’ked by the sandpeople and even the stormtroopers. And that’s why Lil’ Wang stay getting bodied by cats everytime he does a guest verse.

I was thinking that Lil’ Wang was gonna hire Ja Rule on the low [ll] so that maybe he could get a songwriter that understands bars and hooks. Ja Rule knows how to make hit fuckin’ hit song too. Maybe Ja Rule could write some shit for Wang and put Ashanti on the chorus, or some other unknown R & B chick. Ja Rule wrote all of Ashanti’s verses so it don’t matter who they use because the kid is that nice. The other thing Wang needs is beats. He is nearly impossible to listen to over some of the wack beats that have been given to him up to this point. Maybe KanYe can change that although I think if Premier gave Lil’ Wang some music I might look at him differently. [ll] again to that sentence, listen to him differently. This isn’t an East coast bias thing either.

I mean, didn’t Wang try to, er, adopt Jigga’s flow? Lil’ Wang desperately wants to rhyme like some dude from New York City so why not put the people around him that will help him express his shit that way? Ja Rule to write the songs and place some random R & B chick on the hooks and Preemo on the boards to make that shit sound grimey and Hip-Hop. That is the recipe to Wang’s first classic XXL rated album. I might even copp that shit when it drops.

Nah. I’m lying. Fifty Cent won.

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