I Ain’t Got No Money In The Bank…

When the XXL Mag Dot Com site went down a couple of days ago I ain’t gonna lie to y’all but I was scared as shit. I thought that my Harris Publications gravy train had been suddenly derailed. First Scratch Magazine gets put on the skids and then the best gotdamned Hip-Hop website evar gets shut down. I was blaming Curtis ‘Interscope’ Jackson for this turn of events. The KanYe West XXL cover must have sent him into a cataclysmic ‘roid rage. I could imagine that Blackberries were being thrown around with reckless abandon at the G-Unit offices. I was already getting on my plan B grind though.

I sent some e-mails to the people over at the King Magazine website. Yeah, I’ve talked shit to their lead blogger, and maybe I’ve burned some bridges with their editorial staff, but why can’t we let bygones be bygones? I was scrambling like Jermaine Dupri was after the first week of that latest Janet Jackson album. If I was going to be back on the streets again writing for D-list rap magazines it wasn’t going to be due to my lack of begging for a cushy job at another Harris Publications periodical. Guns and Hip-Hop are kind’a related. With basketball season right around the corner I thought maybe I might get a gig at Slam Magazine. Too bad for me that no one in their editorial staff wanted to read my in depth expose on the rise and fall of Harold ‘Baby Jordan’ Miner, or my drop on the greatest Minnesota Timberwolf evar, Isaiah Rider.

How could this shit happen? Everything was going along so swimmingly. Jay-Z was releasing new music that apparently no one cares about. KanYe West has the number one album in the country and the hottest magazine cover on every newsstand. [ll] to that last sentence, of course. Why was Jimmy Iovine doing this to me? I had finally turned a corner after eight months of inane and ridiculous columns about the relationship of semi-retired athletes to semi-retired rappers. I finally found the voice I needed to bring social awareness and polysyllabic lyricism to the massive Hip-Hop collective and it was all being snatched away from me.

This is what I get for thinking that this rap music reporter on the periphery job would last forever. I’m mad that I didn’t save all my money for this eventuality instead of buying cases of Patron and duplicate pairs of Nike Air Max. This should be a lesson to all of you. This Hip-Hop shit won’t last forever, and what will you do when no one wants to hear rap music anymore? Have you saved away enough mental equity to return to mainstream society and still be productive? Are you up on your rock music references like Bol? If you aren’t then I suggest you get your ass to a Borders bookstore and copp the magazine Revolver. They talk a lot of rock shit up in that piece. And in this way you won’t be an outsider when that discussion moves away from rap music. This was a wake up call for me to stop taking this time and this opportunity for granted.

I hope all of you appreciate this forum that Harris provides for us to talk shit to one another and then do it all over again the following day. That in itself is a blessing that we are lucky we don’t have to pay for. So who cares anymore if you leave your comments in all capital letters? At least we have a place to leave comments.

  • gh

    a jay album no one cares about?THATS ALL EVERY ONE TALKS ABOUT .the moment he announced it everyone forgot about fiddy and kanyes albums.his first single is hot.cos its a street look so no one can accuse him of going pop.then he gonna follow it up with the official club banger.jay-z and kanye will have the biggest opening weeks of the year.

  • http://www.akirathedon.com AK D

    Amen!

  • Boner Jams 03

    the greatest Minnesota Timberwolf evar, Isaiah Rider.

    u tellin me that he is better than KG???one of the most versatile big men to ever play the game???Granted he doesn’t have any rings, but come on now…u are reachin with that one big homie…

  • 1,21,2..anditdon’tstop81

    hip-hop will last FOREVER! yo job on the otha hand not so much.

  • sleep

    Niggas he was being sarcastic about the isahi rider comment u can’t be that stupid. And u homey take that shit as a warning sign cause this rap shit is gonna die real sone. Look a kanye he figure that shit he put out a dance disco record called stonger and made you niggas think it was rap.andre 300 started doing blue and whatever he called that shit funk whatever.watch kenny chesney is gonna get the last laugh.

  • missile 6

    Good post Billy. Yeah I was a little worried about the site for a second too. Good thing somebody paid that bill.

  • Rich Arte

    yeah, i aint gonna lie…when I saw that xxlmag.com was redirected to some other site, I thought my manager at work saw that I was on the site too much and decided to block the i.p. address. Glad to see it’s still up and running, I like you guys better than allhiphop.com

    The only thing I go there for is ILLSEED’s rumors. You all need a rumors section.

  • Around and Around

    Best Timberwolve ever- Sprewell, He contributes Rims and B-ball, and chokes coaches that get out of pocket.

  • Tyler

    Here, here my brotha’. . Great post. I would love 2 peep your “indepth expose on the rise and fall of Harold ‘Baby Jordan’ Miner, or my drop on the greatest Minnesota Timberwolf evar, Isaiah Rider” so where it at cuz’? Hook a nigga up please sir. And since U are feeling all lovie, dovie, can I borrow a few bucks?
    SolutionsGlobalMedia.com aka SGM7.com
    Love it or Hate it, Tell a Friend.

  • Clockwork

    Yeah no doubt peoples dont seem to be feeling the new Hov joint but it’s got some dope wordplay in it – even tho the one-syllable Rakim flow on the 3rd verse is gonna kill it’s polysyllabic score!

    “P i repeat if you show me where the pot is”

    “P i…” = Pi (as in 3.14). Pi is a infinite number that never repeats itself. Guess he’s back off that “dumbing down for my audience” shit.

    Would be interested to hear your take on Blue Magic, Billy, as a fan of lyricism…

  • Dan99

    There’s always hiphopdx.com

  • boner jams 03

    Man Harold miner was my nigga in his college days at usc…..little known fact….he was declared the sports illustrated player of the year in college in 1992….beating out lesser-known bums like alonzo mourning and some center out of lsu who dunked a whole lot…i think his name was shaquille o’neal or somethin like that….

  • http://www.xxlmag.com EReal

    I was LOL @ That. I thought Elliot fucked somethin else up for us, hahaha.

    I just went over to DallasPenn.Com and did some catchin up, read Ron Mexico’s shit, he’s always entertaining, I found myself sifting through link upon link of blogs. I do goto AHH, but dont really get too tuff on them, just for the Rumors basicly, now that they have copied your format, and allow comments on news & ish, but it still didnt feel like home.

    XXlmag.com is my web-home. lol. Please be nice to us Jimmy!!! Dont let that interscope pape dry up! See what happens when you fuck around Elliott? Get your G-Unit cover game up before you fuck it up for everyone!

  • Clockwork

    Ayoooo… what happened to the post about Hov’s lyrics going over heads like moneyshots on midget broads???

  • May

    when i saw that xxlmag.com was shut down a few days ago, i got tight for real. that’s part of my routine when i’m on the internet, to go on xxlmag.com. bol’s posts are quite entertaining (even though he says mean sh*t about us females but hey, what can i do about it?) and billy sunday’s hilarious.

    damn. when xxlmag.com was shut down i saw no point in staying online that day.

    Sh*t…xxlmag.com like a f*ckin’ drug.

  • Content

    How could you ever lose your job when every other post is about how great XXL is? They’ll always keep you in the ‘house’.

  • Worley

    Do the Harold Miner piece. I would love to read it. I always wonder about athletes that have been discarded like a Michael Vick pitbull. Oops, did I say white men treat black athletes like the carcass of an animal?

  • LowEndofDaChi

    @ May, real talk. One of my buddies put me on to xxlmag.com, and at first all I peeped was the Bangers section. Then projects started getting slow at work, so I decided to check out the Columnists section. I might not agree with all of the views expressed (or posed in Bol’s case, lol), but you guys always manage to keep a brother entertained throughout the sluggish work week. Props to Billy for the moment of clarity.

  • Chad Biggz

    Xxl dot com is the shit. If yall bring Illseed over here. Yall shit on the world lol.

    I would wanna read about Harold Miner and while you at it tell us about my favorite college point guard of all time Ed Cota.

  • EReal

    Chad Biggz Says:

    September 27th, 2007 at 1:30 pm
    Xxl dot com is the shit. If yall bring Illseed over here. Yall shit on the world lol.
    ^
    CO-SIGN.
    If yall had Illseed over here, Id never leave this site, lol. Well actually, I kinda never do because of tabbed browsing, but you get the point.

  • CINCINNATI BITCHES

    WE WANT ILLSEED…WE WANT ILLSEED…

    OR ATLEAST A BANGIN ASS RUMORS PAGE. WTF?

  • N.O. 4 life

    illseed is the only thing at allhiphop…wendy williams weedcarrier has been good at hhdx but when xxl was out i was mad as hell

  • these posts are racist

    Billy,

    to an extent, this is only relevant for those who make money off of hip hop. I don’t make money off of hip hop, so if hip hop dies, as you predict, it won’t have a pecuniary effect on me.

    I have used rap to cope with life’s ills ever since I was a child, and will continue to do so, no matter what happens to hip hop, econmically.

  • May

    @LowEndofDaChi

    it’s nice to know that someone agrees with me.

  • http://xxlmag.com Billy X. Sunday

    That’s my point though TPAR, just the fact that you have a place to express your Hip-Hop self with polysyllabic terms is enough of a reason to be grateful.

    But I suppose only if your dad taught you how to be.

  • yee

    (Cough) allhiphop.com

  • Cuban Link

    This is one of the very VERY rare occasions “Timberwolves” and “great” can ever be used in the same sentence

  • http://www.myspace.com/sinistahmoneybagz Cleophus J Escobar….Hip-Hops New Tyrant

    HEY YOU, GET OFF MY CLOUD…

    YOU DON’T KNOW ME AND YOU DON’T KNOW MY STYLE!!!!!!

  • these posts are racist

    Billy,

    why do you have to be so disrespectful? I am a grateful person, and do appreciate XXL’s forum. I’ve even thanked you on several occasions for raising different issues that I felt needed to be raised and providing us with a forum to discuss.

  • accurate

    i typed like 20 url’s close to xxlmag the day the site was shut down. i was in mad panicc, bout ready to go flying out ma damn window.
    dont fucc around like that next time guys…

  • Dr Flav

    This is your cash cow? WOW, I might have to lighten up on you some, because thats kinda sad. I cosign TPAR’s view on the topic, the genre was here before this site and will remain. This site is just one of many parking lots of self expression on these internets. I think you giving this forum too much credit, unlike the instant credit you continued to be denied for at Sear’s dept. store. Diversify your portfolio young man.

  • these posts are racist

    Dr Flav, word.

    As a child, I could never afford a tape, CD or even a nice radio to listen to rap. I would borrow my friends’ tapes/CD’s or listen to rap at their houses. I never had cable, so no MTV raps, etc. And sill, hip hop was what helped me get through my poverty and other life problems.

    Whether or not Hip Hop stays econmically relevant or XXL MAG.Com disappears forever, is inconsequential to my life. In fact, it may be good for her.

    Hip Hop is like my grandmother. She could never give me money, but she loved me and gave me hope and inspiration.

    I’ll write a song about it:

    I met this girl when I was 5 years old/, and what i loved most, she had so much soul/….

  • THAT BOY NOAH

    XXLMAG.COM WENT OUT A COUPLE A DAYS AGO???….I COSIGN WITH E REAL XXLMAG.COM IS MY WEB HOME. IVE BEEN HERE SINCE DAY 1. BACK WHEN ELLIOT ANNOUNCED IT ON THE MAGAZINE AND IT STILL WASNT EVEN UP YET.SHOUT OUT TO THE STAFF!

  • Who dat?

    Damn TPAR, Why you go to be all sad or serious or both ? Take it easy man. I couldn’t watch MTV either man…growing up in the savanahs of Africa and shit.

  • boner jams 03

    I would wanna read about Harold Miner and while you at it tell us about my favorite college point guard of all time Ed Cota.

    ed cota was my nigga too…but he aint fuckin with my nigga raymond felton….and oh yeah…check that preseason poll when it drops bitches….UNC preseason #1…aint a better threesome in the county than lawson, ellington, and my favorite white boy, psycho t….

  • Dr Flav

    Who dat I dont think he was tryin to sound sad he was expressing the obstacles he overcame to get to his love of hip hop. Sorry I aint reply back TPAR, I usually hit submit and leave since it usually takes four days for a comment to post, but I was raised in southern WV and had to wait for out of towners or vacationing friends to come back and dub Red Alert and Mister Magic Rap Attack shows on dollar store cassettes. I am hip hop, word to Kris, you got to off me to destroy that shit!

  • http://xxlmag.com Billy X. Sunday

    First off, Brooklyn all day ‘ay day.

    Google Dwayne “Pearl” Washington and even though he was blackskint I ain’t talking ’bout no BlackBerrys, but then again, I’m old like that…
    http://dallaspenn.com/weblog/?p=570

  • Rizzop

    “Guns an hip hop are related”……Fuck outta here..We dont make em, we just steal/buy em…..I know it wasnt the gist of the post but i aint lettin it slip….

  • http://xxlmag.com Billy X. Sunday

    Rizzop,
    That line and link flew over your head, my badd. Go back and click the link. That mag pictured comes from the same people that publish XXL.

    (I hate to have to get like K-Solo and spell shit out to y’all dudes)

  • boner jams 03

    billy x,
    i’m hip to the homie pearl…he was nice..but he wasnt even the best point guard on his own squad when he was at ‘cuse…”the general” sherman douglas was the truth…homie set the ncaa assist record before that cracka ass

  • Boner jams 03

    like i was sayin before i was rudely cut off…..

    douglas set the ncaa assist record before that cracka ass crack bobby hurley broke it…and douglas had a better nba career than pearl…..however, if u wanna go with that flashy, razzle-dazzle, playground and 1 shit, then pearl is ya man…

  • Ryan

    “Too bad for me that no one in their editorial staff wanted to read my in depth expose on the rise and fall of Harold ‘Baby Jordan’ Miner, or my drop on the greatest Minnesota Timberwolf evar, Isaiah Rider.”

    I loved the East Bay Funk, and the time he swatted Ewing at the end of a blowout Knicks win. I wish he was still around. Ditto with “Baby Jordan”, I wish he made more of his career. I still think the greatest T’Wolf ever is Doug West (ok, maybe not, but he was nice for a minute).

    Revolver has some good stuff, but they have just as much shit as they do good features. Pick up Decibel for a better cover to cover read, they’re the best thing going for that kind of music.

  • http://xxlmag.com Billy X. Sunday

    BJ03,
    Sherm was down with Seikaly and the drunken killer Jason Williams, but Pearl was from the Danny Schayes days.