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Chris Lighty Is The Vince McMahon Of This Rap Shit…

Okay, I’m not exactly saying the truth with this drop’s headline. Vince McMahon is a fucking genius. An evil genius, but still a fucking genius. Chris Lighty, not so much. Chris however was smart enough to capitalize on his equity from toting record crates for DJ Red Alert (read: weedcarrier) to owning a multi-million dollar artist management company. Violator Management has guided the careers of some of your favorite rappers from N.O.R.E. to Prodigy to Q-Tip and Missy Elliot. But the recent work that they put in with Busta Rhymes speaks volumes to the direction that they have for the artists under their influence.

Do you remember when Busta used to rhyme? Now Busta is more likely to be on XXL for busting a bottle over someone’s cranium than spitting verses that would make you head spin. The direction from Chris Lighty has been that rap music is now a contact sport and only those artists willing to get in the ring will be victorious. Busta seems to have taken this dictum literally by going into the weight room and drinking Barry Bonds’ smoothies. None of those things have aided Busta’s flow however because the dexterity and flexibility on the microphone that he once displayed is now replaced by a gruff growl better suited for DMX. What flavor Busta has lost on the mic he has gained in sponsorship for product placement of Courvosier and Mountain Dew. Just in case you were wondering, mixing the two isn’t bad either. Tastes just like Red Bull.

Chris Lighty’s own Hulk Hogan is Fisty Scent. That is the franchise player right there if ever there was one. Fisty has the most charisma and marketability of any rapper right now aside from maybe a Lil’ Wang (who is featured in the latest issue of Ghey men’s Quarterly). Fisty Scent represents the image of a Black male that the Tall Israelis want to broadcast not just across America, but across the globe. Instead of displaying a bare-chested savage with nosering and a spear in his hand we have a bare-chested savage with diamond earrings with a microphone in one hand and a gun in the other. The formula works for Vitamin Water and for Tinsletown. ‘Hollywood’ Hulk Hogan meet Curtis ‘Fisty Scent’ Jackson.

Chris Lighty’s latest rap music clients are the New York City based rap triumvirate of Saigon, Papoose and Uncle Murda. Chris’ plan for these new artists out the box has been to put them into a cage match where Saigon gets snuffed by Uncle Murda, only to be blindsided with a chair from the audience by Papoose. Chris believes their squabbling will give their music some type of credibility. Keep in mind this is rap music now and Hip-Hop is dead as far as Chris is concerned. Instead of using these three artists to combine their movements and form a rap music Voltron we instead are reduced to viewing the lowest common denominator in people. The real problem is that rap music itself is as fake as the blood you see on wrestlers inside the ring, but occasionally a Chris Benoit takes that shit to the proverbial next, next level. Vince McMahon doesn’t have a qualms about putting that death and destruction into his product. I imagine that Chris Lighty doesn’t mind either as long as he is making money. Where will that leave Saigon, Papoose and Uncle Murda in the end? Where will that leave Hip-Hop?

Get rich or die trying is still in full effect. I need to get a late pass.

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